reality<LDs

June 29th 2010

Jedi and the Fire Cult

I was at my friend Koerner's house camping in his backyard. There was a giant deck in which the "overseers" were watching the "tribes" in the lawn move and interact. I was in the wide expanse of land that the tribes were in. I was looking at the other tribes and realized my tribe only consisted of me and the other tribes had fire and people moving about. The tribes (there were 3 of them) were in a triangle shape in comparison to each other. I moved northwest to the far corner of the triangle, showing myself to the other tribe. This tribe consisted of a large group of girls. They had a makeshift tent of animal skin, as well as very tall green grass and lightning bugs. Koerner's sister was in this tribe and she came up to me and grabbed my penis. She smiled and shook her head in a proud sort of way, and accepted me into her tribe. That's really awkward. Anyway, I moved into the tribe and saw that they had primitive bike-like apparatus. I asked Koerner's sister if I could take one to travel to the other tribe. She shook her head yes and wheeled one over to me. I got on the bike and...

SCENE CHANGE.

I was riding my bike on a road near my house that ends in a cul-de-sac and was with a few other people, Koerner's sister included. We rode to the end of the road and got to the cul-de-sac and saw a bike path at the far corner. We rode onto it and realized we had entered a beautiful vibrant forest. We rode around for a little while and then....


SCENE CHANGE

I was back at Koerners sister's tribe and was just leaving with the bike. I rode past a great expanse of land quite fast and realized that I had reached the other tribe. This tribe had fire and a large group of people wearing different color paint on thier bodies. It was the "Kahliek" tribe which informed me that they had developed a writing system. I entered the tribe and sat around the fire with someone who looked like the poacher from "Ace Ventura." He told me to complete my first mission I had to hit the fire with my maul. Everything in this dream became exactly like Oblivion dreamplay and I took out my weapon, (a blunt maul) and smacked the fire. I got a "MISSION COMPLETED" sign in front of my vision and talked to the guy. He said "good job, here is your next quest. Buy one of these two weapons, a sword or a falchion." (he took out a soup ladle and a shiskebab from Fallout 3) I took the soup ladle and put it in a treasure chest next to me because at that moment, Darth Vader came looking for it. I appeared in a large town with buildings like in Oblivion and I was leader of the Fire Cult. The Fire Cult was a large "guild" organization that Darth Vader was trying to steal the legendary soup ladle. I was in this shop type thing owned by the Fire Cult and I was stocking the front window that you would look through from outside. I was putting a giant lock on this chest in the front and putting the soup ladle in it. The lock glowed green when I locked it on. I put the treasure chest in the corner face backward and Darth Vader came in the room. He said "WHICH JEDI MADE YOU! YOU ARE A FULL JEDI, WHICH JEDI MADE YOU!" and I screamed "YOU'LL NEVER KNOW WHO MY PARENTS ARE!" He bashed the treasure chest open with a light saber and everytime he hit it a new "jedi couple" would appear. A giant pink beam of light shot out of the treasure chest, followed by a space ship that was shaped like a horseshoe with a giant orb of light circling around it. I got in it and I flew into space. I was being pursued by many similar ships, and we were all on the same pink beam of light. We were shoved into what was essentially a giant tennis ball container. And then my brother woke me up.