solaetia

With my brother and telling him about my friend’s band, listening to them. I tell my friend that they should (re?)name their band Weirguild. I thought about how I had a new apartment to unpack. I wondered if I should go there now, or if it would be better to wait until later.
Suddenly I remembered that I had left my dog at daycare, which was an old apartment I used to live in (#4). I grabbed money but I realize I never saw her enter apartment I just dropped her off in yard. I felt panic rising.

With an old friend (JM) on a bus. She runs thru open bus doors to get out at stop- this seems like a strange thing at the time, like a feat she accomplished. The people on the bus are looking at her in astonishment. It was like she somehow jumped from our bus to the street through another bus into the street again.
We are walking to ? My dog’s vet? We get there and there is a dog that looks like just a head and no legs. He has a tan retro military shirt or hat on. A face that looks almost human. I say he looks like a [military] vet. I know someone who works here.*

Thoughts:
My brother loves music, he also plays some instruments. This particular friend is in a band, and I haven’t talked to him in a long time. Last time we talked he asked me if I had listened to his band yet. (He sent me some links to their music) I felt guilty because I hadn’t. I’ve been phasing this friend out of my life, not because I don’t care for him, but because we had a FWB situation before I met my husband, and my friend admitted feelings for me when I became unavailable. We’ve parted ways in an amiable way, but I don’t think he understands why Ive been ghosting him, even though I have tried to explain it in the past. I said it wouldn’t be fair to my husband, but in reality I felt it would be unfair to my friend to continue being a part of his life if he had feelings he needed to get over.

I was entering an auditorium for some kind of job-related announcement/seminar. Donald Trump is there. The crowd was told that they can’t stay unless they are wearing a certain kind of shoes or attire. I looked down to see I am wearing a pair of strange high-top black with white markings canvas tennis shoes. I had to leave. Someone tells me I should have worn my silver shoes and I feel irritated by this remark.

I went to my apartment, which is similar to an apartment I rented in waking life over 10 years ago. My mom was there, she tells me that Donald Trump has bought the company I work for. I told her he did not, I don’t even work for a company, I work for one woman who calls herself a company. My mom laughs at me, telling me Im wrong. The way she is treating me made me angry. I asked her where are her facts?! And she sort of went catatonic, looking off to here right, not acknowledging me. I yelled at her but Im confused why she isn’t answering me now. Then I realized I was dreaming. I still felt angry so I pushed her and then I decided I was going to through the television out of the window. We were on the 2nd floor, but since I knew I was dreaming i knew there would be no consequences. I did this, and then I left. I was outside on the drive with my dog and I decided to fly. (ho, hum) I had my dog under my left arm and I was holding sandals in my right hand. Once I was floating I realized I didn’t need to hold onto my sandals and I could let my dog to the ground as well. I thought about running with my dog too. The outside of the apartment and the street are almost identical to the apartment I rented over 10 years ago. (#4) My husband wakes me up to tell me he is leaving for work.

Thoughts:
This apartment seems to be an important location. In waking life I lived tree for only a year. When I moved in things were great- I was dating a new guy, I had just started a career I loved, I could pay my bills and I had friends that I went out with regularly. Over the year that I lived there my drinking became out of control, my closest friendship enabled my bad habits. We were robbed together at gunpoint down the street from this apartment while walking to a nearby shopping center. I starting dating a drug-addicted-sociopathic-compulsive liar. I lost more than one good friend and a good job. I ended up moving out of the place and into the house that my crazy partner lived in with some friends. This was the beginning of one of the roughest periods of my life, but that ended up teaching me a lot of valuable lessons. Maybe the apartment symbolizes a transitional period between good and bad?
The dreams where family members hate me or treat me horribly are so common now that I have decided to really focus on becoming lucid in these moments. Instead of throwing things out of a window and flying off though I would like to do something else. Something to break this cycle. Maybe just tell them I love them?
Shoes were a theme in this dream too. I guess they must symbolize how I feel about myself compared to others.? And how dare Trump invade my dreams!

I was at a mechanics to get my car fixed. A song came on the radio (some old R&B or funk song) that I liked, and I felt happy. I told someone that my Dad used to love this song. I started flowing around the parking lot. Realized I was dreaming and became lucid. I flew into the sky and saw 3 blue jays flying near me. I decided to fly next to them, but one of them looked wary of me so I sped up and flew really fast towards the mountains in the distance. I was high up, and there were clouds, and it was beautiful. I landed on the highest peak of the mountain, and I discovered a small room just inside of the rock I landed on. It had a small branch carved into the stone and an olive-green cushion to make the seat more comfortable. There were 2 windows carved into the stone as well, and I looked back out towards the area I flew from.

As I climbed down I lost lucidity. I walked past a house that was partially open (missing outside walls) and I saw an area with lots of shelves and interesting [nature-based?] art. All I can really remember about these objects is that I saw leaves and wood.

I needed to take a shower before a road trip. I had trouble deciding which shower I would use. I knew I had hours until I needed to leave so there was no rush.

I was living in an apartment complex and driving home through the parking lot. I knew I needed to pay my rent but the office was closed. I saw who I thought was the office manager outside talking to another person and I briefly thought maybe I would just walk down and pay the rent to her. But when I parked near the office I saw that there were designated slots to put your rent check in after hours and I decided I would do that. My last name was completely different than my maiden or married name: Polley. First name was the same.

Thoughts:
I have no idea. I have been getting good sleep the last few nights. The lucid dream wasn’t the most lucid I’ve been. I will have to think about these for a while.

Waiting tables, in the weeds. I had to take ashtrays to outside tables to switch out
and I put a bunch of tiny (dirty) ashtrays in my mouth so I could have room to hold other things in my hands. Realized this was gross and removed them, but I think a customer or two saw me.

With an ex (EB) and I was miserable, told him that he needed to move out and he said he wouldn’t but I was determined to get away from him.

Then the situation became a girl that wanted to blackmail me, and she wouldn’t leave unless I gave her money. I can’t remember what she thought she had on me. I kept telling her to move back home, which I think was Florida.

I had a different partner, and even though we were on the verge of ending things, his mother was trying to help me make the girl leave. I was thinking about moving, maybe we were ending things because of this. I remember looking at a map of his mom’s house, the key had the textures of the floors of each room.

Partner and I discussed him throwing a bday party for me, to let friends now I wouldn’t be around for a while. He decided to buy them all tickets to a concert instead of a party. I thought this was weird. (But I guess it’s weird that he would be throwing a party for me that I wouldn’t even be attending.)

Thoughts:
I hate these old ex dreams.

I was walking to my car and it was engulfed in a hedge growth. I tried to break through to sit in the front seat and wait for [someone]. My cat appears from a tree and the branch bends and lowers her to the ground- she looks as if she might fall but doesn’t.

I am still outside in the same area. I see a squirrel and I bend down and it comes to me. I don’t have anything to feed it so I get up before it approaches my hand.

I am in trouble in school, and I have to stay behind for in class detention along with around 5 other students. The teacher is a woman that in waking life I don’t recall ever seeing before. She doesn’t like me, as if I have behaved terribly and deserve no respect. She lets the two students she likes go home, and ignores us. The two other students and I get angry at how she is treating us. I get up and move to leave as well, and I knock things off of her desk.

I get a newsletter via email titled ‘The Dawn of the Voice.’

Thoughts:
The newsletter is probably a reference to a design job I might have to work on. I slept well and all the way through the night last night, but I felt frustrated this morning that I didn’t wake up immediately remembering my dreams. Once again I feel like I am not being very mindful and feel more determined to practice awareness and ramp up my meditation times.

Outside view of ‘my house’ [not house in waking life] It is dark outside, but the house is white and lit by moonlight. On the roof there is a small cemetery. Suddenly I am in the house, upstairs, near the window facing the cemetery. I hear a voice whispering my name: ‘soooolaaeeetttiiiaaa…I’m looking for sssooolllaaaeettiiaa…’ I open the window and there is a small creature with a black hooded cloak. It asks me if I will tickle it. <This sounds way more scary as I type it than it was experiencing it. The creature, although it’s skeletal face was mostly obscured, seemed benign.

I was working at the old cafe, but we had desks and small 8”-10” retro monitors. One of my monitors just said ‘baseball’ in white type on a black screen. A man who was either just hired or a new client hovered over me as another boss/employee explained what I was working on. I felt my space was being violated. Later, I was in the restroom and a man walked in looking around for things. I yelled at him to get out, and he argued that he knows what I look like and isn’t interested in me, he just needed some things from this room. Again, I felt violated.

People from the cafe were boxing up there things, I was one of the last people in the building. I had three bags and many different clothes and shoes that I was trying to gather and decide what to wear. A girl was lugging her things out and remarked on all the people being jailed. I responded that I was surprised or something, and she asked me in a slight shock if I wasn’t being arrested too? I said no they hadn’t arrested me, and she seemed to think that was unfair and continued on her way.


Thoughts:
My dreams seem uninteresting and meaningless at the moment, and I don’t feel like I am gaining much insight- expect that I am not very attend to my inner self at the moment. Maybe that’s the point. I feel distracted by things going on in my waking life. I know though that continuing to journal I will have some break throughs and get back to where I want to be, and hopefully progress from there.

I was with a mutated-dream-version of friend and their family. In my dream, their oldest son, who was still a child, had recently passed away. They still had one other young son, and I was talking to him in a mall that we were all shopping in for a new bed for the little boy. He asked me if the bed was going to be for [dead son]. I felt sad and confused on how to answer this.

I was working in a restaurant setting and a co-worker told me that I had forgotten to bring a mat over when I brought the flatware. I recalled seeing this blue mat (maybe something that you would lay dishes on to dry?) so I went back to the area I thought it was and grabbed it. I felt a sense of satisfaction because I suspected my co-worker wanted to get me into trouble.

dream fragment- Two newborn lion cubs, maybe more. Not in a wild setting. Another human present and we were commenting on the cubs but I don’t remember what we said.

Thoughts:
This friend of mine and family are in town right now and I probably won’t see them before they leave. The restaurant dream is a common theme for me. The co-worker in the dream was in waking life a girl I went to high school with that I haven’t talked to in many many years. Finally not a dog-centric dream!

I was on a dark street with my dog (I seriously must have nothing else going on in my life) and she suddenly ran off toward the river. I was shocked because she has never done this, and she was ignoring my calls. I finally caught up with her but I didn’t have a leash. I thought it would be a good idea to put her in my car (I can’t remember what I was doing at the time, but I was going somewhere that wasn’t home.) I held onto my dog’s collar as we walked back and I encountered a drunk man that I apparently knew as a regular in a restaurant I worked at. He made some random comments that I don’t remember and I felt slightly uncomfortable. I went into a theater/pub where two of my friends were. One of them had my car keys. The first one I encountered, Amy, was announcing someone to the crowd. I tried to get her attention but couldn’t. I saw my other friend, Angi, and she gave me my keys. My dog morphed between my current dog and my last dog, who passed away almost a decade ago. This is not uncommon. I also remember driving by an outdoor laundromat during the day, and thinking that I could work there, that it didn’t seem so bad. The place was basically a parking lot with one or two washing machines/dryers and a stand with a bunch of hot pink and bright blue flowers for sale.

I had dreams of trying to solve graphic design problems too, in fact I thin this is what the bilk of my night was spent doing. I'm currently taking some courses, and I guess my brain is working overtime.

Thoughts: I took Valerian Root before bed last night, probably falling asleep around 12:15am, which is late for me. I read some design books in bed before sleeping. My thoughts seemed to be racing again—not very stressful thoughts, but my brain struggled to relax. Again, visualization practices seemed difficult and uninteresting. Woke up at 3am and read for an hour or two, fell back asleep around 5ish. I'm taking my dog to the vet today for vaccines. Looking for part time work.

1. I went into a basement level shop to check on the alteration of a bra/corset. It was metallic grey. The shop couldn’t find it.

2. My dog was recovering from a surgery of some kind, (injury on one of her hips/hind legs?) and I decided to stay with Jane, a woman who used to work at the dog training facility we attended. In my dream I only lived a block or so away from Jane, and it was total dream logic as to why I needed to stay at her place. I remember her asking me, and I told her that I knew she was trained in case something happened while my dog was recovering. She seemed to disagree that she was qualified, but I justified it in my mind. Later though, I remember thinking I should gather up my things and go home so I started to do that. Just then, some people came to Jane’s front door- a group of meshy-looking adults that seemed to want to sing for us. They had 2 dogs and I held my dog back and said she wasn’t good with other dogs (partial lie). They came inside anyway, and stood around us and seemed intimidating. It was a mixture of men and women, specifically I only remember the pockmarked face of a man with a mustache. I decided to continue gathering my things and bolt. I had an old long blue car, maybe something like circa 1970s. It barely ran, and some people in the group made fun of me as I drove off. I said, ‘This isn’t my only car!’ The way in which I was driving was more like me on a toy car (sitting on top of a small car) which is common in my dreams.

3. Ordering dog food online. This felt like a longish session of me being unable to make a decision on what type and size food to order. ???



Thoughts: I went to bed after a full day of work and exercise. I took a melatonin because my mind wasn't feeling very tired. I read for a while and then slept like a dead person until @3am, when I woke up and remembered just a small portion of the corset dream. Read for about an hour and a half, tossed and turned until I fell back asleep. Thoughts more active than usual, had trouble quieting my mind, and visualization did not come easily. I'm not sure what these dreams mean if they mean anything. My dog has an upcoming vet visit for a vaccination. She was a little sick the other day but otherwise very healthy and happy.

I went to bed early last night on 3 glasses of wine (yeah I know) and mild depression. I woke up around 2am with memories of a dream where my brother was very angry with me. I have these dreams fairly regularly, where either my brother, my mom, or my husband really seem to hate me and I can't figure out what it is that I have done that has made them feel this way, or to this extreme. I also had memories of being near a black dog -maybe a lab/mastiff mix?- who was viciously defending her puppy from my dog Cayna and I. I was trying to slowly back away and keep my dog from interacting with the angry dog mama, and my fingers were very nearly bitten off several times. When I woke up with these dreams still on hand, I felt too sick and too apathetic to write them down.

I read for about an hour before I laid back down to attempt sleep. WILDs were on my mind, they almost always are in the early morning hours because I've had so many in these circumstances. I usually know I have to lie on my back and remain very still until I feel myself getting sleepy, then the buzzing/synthesizer noises come and then I feel myself push out of my body and float away from the bed. I tossed and turned and slept for minutes at a time until I returned to lying on my back and feeling really sleepy. I heard loud discordant crashing sounds instead of the more usual buzzing/synth sounds. I felt myself rise out of my body, and I floated to my right and up until I was against the wall. Where my face was touching the wall, I could see an Iggy Pop poster hanging there in the darkness. I don't actually have this poster or any poster hanging there, but I didn't think much of this, and I continued to float, but towards the ground at the foot of my bed. My dog's bed is there, and when I landed I saw her; her face slightly distorted like it has been in other lucid dreams, sort of snarling and scared. I tell her it's ok, I'm dreaming. As usual, I worry if I am really at the foot of my bed and talking out loud. I get up and try to fly. It works, and I start wondering around my house. The clarity wasn't the best I've had. My house was dim, somethings were normal, and others weren't. As I approached my front door I thought, 'Wait! I should experiment here. Should I meditate? (I've done this before with strange effects) Then I decided I would try to reinvent the interior of my home, because as I was trying to fall asleep earlier in the night I have visualized a fantastic treehouse/hobbit-hole house in a forest of giant trees. I closed my eyes and told my self that when I opened them, my house would be amazing. It didn't really work. My kitchen had expanded and looked different, but my old rotten house was still mostly there. From here I lost lucidity or my memory of what happened next.

New dream: I was with my Mom and Step-Dad in an upscale department store/hotel. They were trying to exit the store by climbing up some rocks that were part of a display, and I was trying to explain that all they had to do was walk through a couple of hallways back to the hotel and exit from there. They didn't seem convinced, and anyway, had already managed to mostly slip through a crack in the wall to the outside sidewalk above.

Then I was with my brother in McDonalds (!!! I haven't eaten fast food in a long time). We each had our laptops and it seemed like we were having a meeting. I was just going to order some coffee. At first we were trying to squeeze into a booth with 4 other people, and then I noticed all of the other empty booths around and suggested we use one of those. The dream gets even less cohesive here—my brother's wife was there, then we were either at their house or my Mom's. Dialogue happened but I can't remember much of what we talked about. A portion was about Shepherd puppies, and people breeding them, and how one guy had a web-cam on his to help sell them. I was trying to share my knowledge of Shepherds but no one wanted to listen.

Then I was in a car, maybe in the backseat but someone else was definitely driving. My mom and her husband were saying things about me that I found really out-of-touch, like laughing about how I love certain things/celebrities that I haven't been into since i was a teenager. I tried to correct them but they just smiled like they knew better. Then my Dad called. (he passed away last year) He told me Happy Birthday (not my birthday, but maybe I was thinking of Father's Day?) and was his usual excited and goofy self. He also joked about me liking a certain celebrity and things I used to like when I was a teenager. I turned to the woman driving, who I could now see (and I seemed to be in the front passenger seat now) and I knew she was my dad's girlfriend(dream only, not IRL). I tried to tell her that I wasn't the same person they thought I was, and she seemed to pay more attention, but still didn't really believe me.

Last, I was walking and talking to a vague someone and explaining to them how it seems that I must come off as stupid to everyone because it seems like everyone treats me that way. The look on their face told me that they also thought I was stupid, but was trying to placate me.

Thoughts:
I gave a lot of exposition throughout, so there isn't much extra to add. I think I have self esteem issues, anxiety, and guilt over not seeing my family much nor feeling very connected to them.

An environmental catastrophe was about to happen to the Earth. Humans were aware of this, and there was a system installed in which we all had to wait for our name to be called (sometimes in groups, sometimes alone) and step aboard a small asteroid-like rock that floated nearby a cliff. The asteroid was like a disposable mini-rocket, and as it launched off with each group, it begin slowly disintegrating until the people aboard would fall to the ground and die, or be injured and die later. It was terrible, but not very real-feeling. I watched a friend die, then came my turn, and I woke up before I died.

I fell back asleep and entered a similar scenario, only this time it felt more real. I was living in a 'Fall-Out' type village, with very few amenities and maybe 50 people at most. We were under the control of another group of humans, like a military or militia. We had a local stand where a guy sold things like cigarettes, food, drink, drugs, etc. There was a man who delivered small amounts of rations regularly. I saw some soldiers going into some of the other homes on the compound and I knew the end was coming soon, they were going to take us away, and some [vague] bad thing was going to happen. During one moment I seemed to be playing the role of a child, although I also had my current dog, Cayna. I heard that the soldiers weren't allowing animals to come along and I began to panic. I knew I couldn't leave Cayna behind. She would starve. I knew she had been abandoned before and I dreaded the idea of putting her through that again, at my hands. I was leaving the home I shared with other people and I think I told a woman and her 2 kids that I had a dog and I was so sad to be made to leave it. I asked her if she was ready to leave too, and she said they were staying, because they have a cat, and if you sleep outside with your pet you can stay. I was thrilled and went to get my mother [random woman in dream, not real mom]. I saw her in the back of a car being driven away. I cried for her and she looked back and seemed to be crying out in pain of leaving me behind.

I had Cayna though, and now I seemed to be back to my regular age because my husband was with me. I knew sooner or later we would be forced to commit mass suicide. I felt an enormous amount of dread. I thought, 'This is the worst possible ways things could end.' I wondered about Cayna again, and how she would survive without us. I thought she would have plenty to eat for a while—the left behind food and corpses...but then something convinced me that her death would be horrible if I let her live and I began to wonder if the safest thing to do for her was also poison her when we had to poison ourselves. My heart hurt; how could this be happening? I thought wouldn't it be wonderful if somehow, right before the and that someone said we didn't have to die after all? We could go on living! I felt a sting of hope rise and die quickly. I looked at my husband who was teary-eyed as well and told him that maybe the best thing for Cayna in the end would be to take her with us. He cringed and seemed to emote that he didn't want to talk about it. I said, 'I understand but I just wanted to say it now so when the time comes we had talked about it.'

Some time went by. We were outside this entire conversation, my husband and I. He suddenly told me to hold still and he began plucking at something on top of my head. He plucked off a ladybug -still attached to some of my hair- that he said had burrowed itself into my head/hair.

Thoughts:
I had some allergy issues right before bed, and my throat felt tight, felt itchy, and it felt a little hard to breathe. I've had allergy induced asthma before and it wasn't that bad, but I decided to take a Benedryl to relieve my symptoms. My husband spends lots of time playing Fall Out 4 lately, and I think the post-apocalyptic town was designed with that in mind. I have been a little worried about my dog. She is aging, and I wonder if I am giving her the absolute best care that I could be. Do I exercise her too hardly when we run? Do I feed her too much? etc. I found it interesting as I typed it out that my worries about abandoning my dog turned into me playing a child being 'abandoned' by my [dream]mother. I'm not sure what that means though.

I was floating in an ocean in mostly darkness, although I could see below the surface of the water. I could see my legs moving to keep me afloat, and a long rope attached to me, via my waist I believe. On the other end was a camera. I was part of some experiment for me or an unknown identity to explore depths of this water.

Later:
I reunited with an ex from my distant past. I'll call him Jake. My first memory of the dream is Jake and I laying in bed in the morning, sitting up with our backs propped on pillows against the wall. We were talking, and Jake said, 'Don't go falling in love right away.' I was not in fact feeling happy I was there, and felt like perhaps I had made a mistake. I said, 'I'm not, don't worry.' Jake looked hurt, and I realized he had actually seemed very happy we had re-connected, and maybe I had hurt his feelings. We were on some kind of trip, and we were leaving this day. I packed up, and Jake didn't talk to me much. Randomly my mom was there, as well as my step-dad, accompanying us on our journey home. Next we were in a car with a young version of my bio-dad driving. I was in the back, Jake in the front. He said, "We need to talk later, and I hope you remember what you promised me back [at the bleachers? football field? I have a vague image in my mind of what he meant, but I don't remember what he said]. I also didn't remember what I had promised him and I felt a little nervous, and a little like a jackass and I thought I was probably ending things once again with Jake and he would hate me.

Next Jake and I (and maybe my family?) are in a grocery. I have an old, ragged roller suitcase. I stand next to a store employee and notice a crow at his feet. The crow is eating tiny crumbs of debris from the floor. I laugh to the store employee and we both agree the crow is a great little helper (keeping the floors clean). The crow begins to peck and tug at my suitcase, but I don't care because it's old. Then without my direct recognition of this in the dream, the crow is a dog, like an Australian Shepherd, and we are playing tug of war with my suitcase.

We stopped at a small Bed and Breakfast, my mom and her husband resurfaced. They showed us the rooms we would be staying in. The entire Bed and Breakfast shared one kitchen. I didn't like this idea but I wasn't too bothered because I knew we were only staying one night. It was a cozy place, like a grandmother's home. Jake, an older man [replacement for my Dad and Stepdad?] and I sat around the kitchen table. Jake was talking about how many horrible people there are in the world. I said, 'But there are lots of great people too,' I start to mention how I also think about how everyone was once an innocent child, but Jake seems not to care what I have to say. A baby crawls into the room and spills a small amount of soda on the rug. I laugh and the baby giggles, and I teach it how to clean up the spill. The baby, clad in a diaper, seems to only be around 8 months - 1 year old. I ask Jake and the man if they have seen that funny new Hitler movie. 'You know, the German one, where Hitler time travels to present day after he thought he killed himself? It's really pretty funny in some spots."


Thoughts:
The ocean beginning seems very obviously symbolic of me looking deep into my emotional past or sub-conscious. I can also see how it is a well-executed prelude to the following dream. As far as the 2nd dream, I have been dreaming rather frequently about various exes, and finding myself stuck in relationships with them again. I'm afraid this says something about my latent insecurities about my marriage; aspects of it that remind me of things in past relationships I didn't like, or things about myself that I don't like. In waking life I am very happily married, and although my husband and I are working to better ourselves, I suppose I am looking forward to a time in the future where these things have changed.

I fell back asleep this morning while trying to visualize floating on a river. I practice visualization pretty regularly, and occasionally it produces a WILD. When I initially entered the dream I thought that it must be one of the rivers nearby, as the landscape looks the same. I seemed to be floating on an invisible boat, or I just never looked down because my field of vision was just the river and the trees on either side. Instead of moving forward slowly, like floating on a boat, my body felt the sensation of going backwards, and rather quickly, and feeling regular patterns of large swells of waves, almost like a slow, backwards rollercoaster. The scene was in fact similar to the image on a video of a simulated ride. After a little while of really enjoying this sensation, I was plunged into darkness, and had a tingling sensation. I continued to feel as if I were moving backwards, only now it felt more like falling. A tiny fear came up in me and I briefly thought of death. I saw tiny orange and yellow moving geometric figures accompanied by rapid 'tink tink tink tink' sounds as they slid around on either side of my visual field, sort of like a mini tetris game.


Thoughts: The was not quite an OBE, as I did not have the sensation of moving or jumping out of my body as I have in the past.

Hi everyone,

I call myself Solaetia here. I'm a, ahem, 'middle-aged' human female and I've been interested in dreams since I was a kid. The first dream I remember was from when I was around 4 years old, it was short and involved my dog and Robin Williams in his role as 'Mork' (70's kid) I was playing with my dog when I saw Mork was visiting us, along with my grandma and grandpa. ^_^ The first nightmare I remember happened when I was around 5-6 years old, and involved being sucked into a picture that sat on the nightstand next to my bed, and turned into a cartoon. I began having reoccurring nightmares about bears when I was 12, and they lasted throughout my early 20s, although I still have bear dreams now and then they don't have the power that they once did. I had my first lucid dream at 15 before I knew what they were called. I discovered Stephen LaBerge's book 'Exploring the World of Lucid Dreaming' when I was around 17 and I believe that is when my true oneironautic journey began.

It's been a while since I've kept an online DJ (I used SawLogs for a few years back when it was online) and I am excited to be back in a dream community. I feel more connected to myself when I record my dreams. My goals are to keep that up, continue to exercise and advance my LD skills, study and practice Dream Yoga, and to become overall more aware in waking and sleeping life.

Happy to be here.

Solaetia