dream fragment

When I first post my dreams they will almost always be a rough draft because I type them right after waking up and copy and paste what I could remember here. I will come in to write the details later! The lucid dreams will be heavily detailed in the beginning and I will come to elaborate on the regular dreams later.

My main technique for lucid dreaming is trying to focus on everyday life. Give myself ways to stay conscious throughout the day. I'm still pretty bad at this, but I guess it is slowly getting better. It makes ordinary life more fascinating at least. I can never had one specific title for my dream posts because I have recall multiple dreams in one night. I usually have so many dreams that it is difficult to remember them just because of how much I need to write to get all of the dreams down.

Color Coding System:
Regular Dream
My thoughts about the dream
Lucid Dream
False Awakening

Chinese names to cover identities of real people

Car Sick

In a car with one of my roommates, 艾娜. I am not sure where we are driving to, we are in a deserted looking area. Almost like a desert. We stop close to a restaurant/hotel. I stop the car in the middle of the road and get out. I am worried about parking it there, but I figure it will just be a short while. I get sick and go throw up. I try to cover the fact that I am throwing up when someone comes over to ask if I would like to reserve a table. I try to make it look like I am just wiping my mouth and slowly rise. He assume that I am going to be sitting at the dinner table with this one Chinese guy. I find him attractive, but tell him that I'm not interested in a table. I start to see the Chinese guy who was at the table talking to another guy while looking over towards me; I believe at least one of them or both were Chinese American. They start to fight for my attention, trying to get me to look over in their direction.

The Alleged Suicide of Bethany

I am in a room with several other people, though just as an observer. The three people in the room begin discussing some matter or the other, not sure what it was exactly. One woman recites a poem that she made up having to do with a river and drowning, it has some element of being morbid and sad. After saying it, one of the other people asks her where she learned that poem. She replies that she got it from a play called Beth (which I assume is referring to Macbeth). After she says the word "Beth" the second woman in the room accuses her of actually meaning to say Bethany, which is the name of the woman that was killed. She then talks about how she must have been involved in Bethany's death. She brings up how she brought a dress to Bethany's bedside for her reaction to it. She would put her hand on the dress to see how she reacted to it. She also mentions how she would spend over 170 hours on Facebook. I am assuming to research information about Bethany's death? Also I remember thinking in the dream that 170 hours is not that much, but in my dream I mistook her saying 170 hours for 170 minutes, which is only a little over 2 hours. Then I realized that even 2 hours on facebook is a lot of time.

Sexual Abuse - slightly graphic

I have a dream about 婻. She enters my dream and tries to kiss me on the mouth. I avoid her as she gets closer to me. Horrified I wonder what is wrong with her. She puts her hand on my chest and tries to get closer to me. Mentioning something about another friend I have that I would be okay doing that with. She acts possessed in the dream. I wake up horrified. I wonder how I didn't realize this was a lucid dream since it was very out of character for her, but then I think that maybe in my subconscious I feel this is something she might be capable of.

No Future

I talk to my sister about her ambitions and the program she wants to research in. She tells me she is considering no longer doing it, but she is worried about being the disappointing one in the family since everyone else was disappointed with me and what I did with my life. She doesn't want to upset my dad.

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Meeting in a Dark Room Turns Party

A lot of movement happens before entering my lucid dream. I am always in some type of dark void moving around. I end up lucid in a house with a bunch of black people, behind a guy who is sagging his pants. I accidentally grab onto them and they pull down a little so I move back away from him as I am afraid of accidentally offending dream characters. I follow them upstairs. It is very dark. I realize a lot of my lucid dreams lately have been dark for some reason. I try to mentally turn on the light in the room, but to no resolve. I then decide I will close my eyes and imagine light! I end up leaving the dream. Well this isn’t very good. I guess I’ll try to go back maybe. So I am floating upwards into space moving around twisting and turning. I start to concentrate on the people on the couch. I start falling down, down, down, down. I’m still concentrating on the couch. I end up back on the couch and some lights are finally turned on. Though this time I am at some sort of party. I start walking around noticing all of the different people in the dream. I walk past one guy and wave at him. He is a tall black gay guy with dreads, he kind of scowls at me after waving hi to him as if he is thinking “why are you taking to me?” I keep walking and try to start talking to myself to hear my own voice. I didn't speak out loud originally because I thought it would end the lucid dream for whatever reason, and also because I believe I can communicate with the people in my dream by just thinking anyway. I continue to around the party until I see Cookie and Luscious from The Empire (a TV show) sitting at a table laughing and smiling. Cooke's hair is done up and she is wearing bright red/orange looking lipstick. I continue walking and see a character from The Game. I keep moving around hoping I can see two of my favorite guy characters from the show. I then see Tay Diggs from The Game. Wanting to play around with my lucidity a bit, I ask him if I can kiss him. “Yea, sure.” He replies with slight hesitation. He is extremely tall in my dream. He must be at least 6’4. As I go in for a kiss he tells to me wait, that he wants to jump back in the pool first because he’s worried his breath smells like pizza. I assume he is maybe going to gargle the pool water to get rid of it, which I find slightly strange but at the time I thought it was normal. I follow him outside and watch him jump back into the pool. I also want to jump in but I am fully dressed. I am wearing a white and peach looking dress/jumpsuit, not sure how else to describe it. I figure I can jump in because I am dreaming anyway and I can just make myself dry when I get out. I start to jump in but realize how high up I am. I see a woman at the bottom. Next to her are two twins, black women with big poofy loosely curled hair and a white female friend of theirs. The woman at the bottom is also white and her hair is braided loosely into twists, which seem to be fake locks for her as her hair looks very thick and coarse and the twists stick out to the sides instead of lying straight down. I start to jump in but I am too high up. I look down and realize I might end up hitting the stairs that lead to the shallow end of the pool. The girl with the twists makes a comment about my hair, "Did you like do mock locks or something?" She says to me. I look at her with confusion. "Um, my hair is in twists. It doesn’t look anything like locks…" She replies, “I know! I was just thinking you black people love to do ghetto stuff with your hair.” I end up next to her. Annoyed I reply something like “What the hell kind of comment is that?” She says, “I’m just kidding!! Gosh lighten up!”

“Don’t make comments like that to any black people. Especially ones that you are not even friends with.” Annoyed, I start to leave the pool area, and end up in a game room with Michael Jackson. Yes a lot of celebrities in this dream…which is kind of weird for me. We play some type of car race game where you press a button and a difference sequence of actions pop up one by one. You keep choosing until you are happy with your sequence of attacks on the other player. When you are done you both allow them to play out. When you are hit, your part of the game starts shaking. It was on something that I guess could be described as a long, black pole. One opponent stands on one side with the other person standing on the other. You face each other and if your part vibrates it will make you move and fall so you are acting as if you have been actually hit. Michael Jackson would get very dramatic when he had been “hit”. Like falling down and clutching his chest. I guess it would be pretty entertaining if I wasn’t so confused about this type of game. After this part of the game I lose consciousness and wake up.

Little Minchkin and the Road Trip

I am with my parents and as we are walking in an indoor parking garage I see one of my sandals on the ground right after realizing that one of my sandals was missing off of my feet. My dad scolds me for being so careless with my things. Inside of the car my mom starts to put all of our dirty shoes in a bag. My dad gives her his sandals to put in the bag since they are too dirty. The shoes are all filled with sand. I am assuming we all went to the beach. As we are driving in the car, my dog Minchkin starts to climb onto my legs and stick his little face out of the window. However, he is too forceful with doing it and I am scared he will fly out of the window. I hold onto him tightly and only put him a little close to the window, but not all the way.

Buying New Balance Shoes in Shanghai

I am outside trying to buy New Balance shoes for 周周, I ask what type of shoes they have and see they only have really big sizes (European size 50) and really small sizes for a baby. The woman selling them says they don't have any other in between sizes right now and that all of the styles are for men.