Have a big problem with the sexualness of lucid dreams

[Connor23]

Well, i haven't really had a lot of lucid dreams but for the handful i've had, i can never do anything i really want because it all leads to something sexual, like the best example i can think of is when i had my first induced lucid dream, i spent a couple minutes stabilizing it then i had a huge intent on flying, but i saw some girl from my school and i just walked by her and we started making out, soon after i got excited and woke up, the next time was when i was playing with the idea of controlling fire, it was going great until i saw some girl, sure enough it happened again, and i woke up really disappointed and mad because my lucids are only a few minutes because of this. i would really like to get advice because i cant experience all the things i would love to do in lucid dreaming because of this. i really try not to get caught up in things like that, but as soon as it happens i just give in.

[dtc119]

Yeah.... it's pretty hard not to. I'd say my first 10-20 lucids always turned sexual. Or a wasted attempt at turning corners / opening doors in attempts to find a hot guy. You'll get it. Make yourself a mantra or a checklist, maybe a meditative exercise. Make a mental list of things you need to do the instant you become lucid. Mine: stop what i'm doing. stop moving. take a deep breath. take a long, in-depth analysis of your surroundings to stabilize. remember to rub my hands/chest/body or grab an object and clench it, and then perform my current goal.. lol, my current goal: lucid snowboarding. i've yet to do it, and i love snowboarding. can't wait

[Ferret]

I have had this problem quite a few times aswel, it always makes me wake up from my dream a lot earlier than I would have otherwise, and I dont even have that much intrest in lucid sex. Like yea its cool every now and then but a few of my last ones have been like this and its really anoying! I just wana go do fun stuff! I think when I was doing my best was when I would set really strong goals of what I wanted to do. Like every time I did a reality check I would think about my goals and even imagine myself doing them and whenever I became lucid I would instantly know what I had to do. Lucid snowboarding is frikken awsome! You can go so damn hard, in my dream journal iv got a lucid sandboarding dream, was one of my favs, its was really cool and I was just doing it on my feet without a board.

[Zephyrus]

What i do as soon as i become lucid is fly, forget stabilization. I just immediately jump up and fly, and i concentrate only on flying and slightly on my surroundings, that way, all DC's disappear, from there i work on other dream goals (i have only lost one lucid due to not stabilizing, and they were all DILD) my current goal: lucid snowboarding. i've yet to do it, and i love snowboarding. can't wait same i love snowboarding! i'v managed to do it once, but a dream scene change made me grass board instead (still quite fun)

[Sigmund]

To be honest, none of my LD's have been even remotely sexual. Sorry if I seem blunt, but I'd rather have real sex than fake sex someone in my head (and frankly that just seems like masturbation). As others have said, maybe make yourself a mantra that you say to yourself before dreaming (or frequently throughout the day) that you'll focus more on your goals. I can't tell you exactly how to phrase it, otherwise you wouldn't be using your own mantra. If you're lucid enough to constantly think without changing your entire dream, next time you see a girl, just think to yourself something like, "That girl always ignores me." It goes along the same lines as, "This door leads to Siberia." When you believe something like that with a defining statement, it usually happens the way you want. Then you can go straight into accomplishing your goals. By the way, as a person who skis, I now have a new goal to go Lucid Skiing. Thanks last few posters!

[dakotahnok]

Just making out? If so than sex would REALLY knock you out of the dream. I can actually have sex and remain in the dream.

[Connor23]

wow, now im gunna go rollerblading really fast with just my shoes

[Connor23]

Just making out? If so than sex would REALLY knock you out of the dream. I can actually have sex and remain in the dream. congrats i guess, things were always leading to sex i just popped out of the dream before i ever really got there. i would always be really close than i wake up,

[dakotahnok]

Congrats? lol nothing to congratulate on. I guess i worded the other post wrong.

[NrElAx]

Snowboarding is one of my goals to do in a lucid dream. I'm just gonna go crazy fast down the mountain haha. Knowing my sexual life at the moment, I'd probably wake up after sex but hopefully not just making out.

[Connor23]

ok, im looking for advice what to do to stop myself from doing this and i have had a few good responses i don't care if you can have lucid sex or not. im just how to get past this. i dont want to be rude but if you have advice please give it, not your opinion on me waking up from making out in lucid dream.

[AscendedSleeper]

I would say having a clear plan of what you are going to do when lucid would help. Start with the stabalization (very important) then have a good idea of what you will procede to do whether that be flying or whatever else you want. You could go through the plan in your head throughout the day and when falling asleep if you want an even better chance of remembering it when lucid.

[Zephyrus]

I would say having a clear plan of what you are going to do when lucid would help. Start with the stabalization (very important) then have a good idea of what you will procede to do whether that be flying or whatever else you want. You could go through the plan in your head throughout the day and when falling asleep if you want an even better chance of remembering it when lucid. forget stabilization!!! just get the hell out of there! just get away from the current scene before a DC distracts you!

[Connor23]

what if i dont know how to fly?

[Kolten]

Learn how to fly in your own way. I start off with a run and jump as far as i can and just start flying. But on the sexual part, if you can learn to control your excitement it won't wake you up.

[Connor23]

i tried really hard not to get excited and i thought i wasnt because the first thing i did was sit down and breathe calmly for a few minutes while stabilizing, but it ended anyway.

[Kolten]

Well when it comes to sexual activity it takes a little bit of practice to not get excited, just because it's natural for the body to do that.

[Connor23]

Which is what i knew would happen but i couldn't control myself, i guess i was just really overwhelmed with the control and lost my focus for my goals

[Kolten]

Yeah probably, and are they usually girls you know? or girls that you have never seen before? Because when it's girls you know and you see them everyday and they are sexually attractive that tends to happen to some people.

[Connor23]

they are people i see at school everyday and i think they are attractive, and since lucid dreams is the only time i can express those feelings safely, thats another thing that helped me lose focus

[Kolten]

That's probably exactly the reason. Do you meditate or anything? Because when you are going through puberty your hormones kind of go crazy, and meditation really helps with that.

[Connor23]

really? i used to meditate a couple times a week but i havent been able to sit down and meditate for a while, just during the day or before sleep?

[Kolten]

Yes meditation and yoga can really help you have control over your body ( I prefer meditating) but just do it 10-30 minutes before you go to bed.

[Connor23]

awesome, thanks for the idea

[Kolten]

No problem, and good luck.