Hello All,
I am new here, and I hope I am in the right place. Before I recount my dream, I want to give you a little bit of background.

I have been married for a little over 3 months, and have been tring to concieve during this time. I suffer from infertility. We may not have been trying for very long, but I have known of the pre-existing condition causing my infertility for about 6 years. We have not yet undergone fertility treatments, but plan to very soon. It causes me great emotional turmoil, at times (especially now), it has been all consuming and it greatly effects all aspects of my life.

You should also know that I feel as though I have had precognitve premonitions about my not being able to get pregnant, despite modern medicine. I had my first encounter with this at 6 years old, when I cried to my mother that I believe I'd "never be able to have a baby".

Sometimes I feel a bit of hope kick in, a bit of optimism, and I feel like maybe it can happen for me. Last night I was feeling this way, right before I went to sleep. Then, I had a very vivid dream in the early morning hours. I remember even waking up during the dream, falling back to sleep again, and the dream would continue, just as vivid.

In the dream, I was in the process of adopting babies. The dream was very strange, and set in the old house I grew up in (my grandmother's house, a two family where I had lived for 22 years, but I have not lived there in 6 years- my grandmother continues to live there but is in the process of selling).

An "agency" of some form was bringing babies over to show me, and I had to choose one or two of them. I had asked for baby girls, but almost all of the babies were boys, and I was choosing boys- I have no idea why, since I would love a little girl. There were at least 5 or 6 babies present in the dream. Most had dark hair and olive skin, except the last baby, who was very small and had blonde hair and blue eyes, but with a spanish name. Someone in the dream mentioned that this baby in particular was in "deserate need". His diaper was also soiled, and I layed him down in an old doll carriage resembing one I had played with in childhood, which I lined with a paper padding, to change him. The dream ended there.

That particular child only smiled when I lifted him above my head and bounced him a little. Another child that I was "adopting" but didn't know why, as supposed to be 6 months old, but looked to be 3 or 4 years old. I had asked specifically for newborns who were 2 or 3 days old, but all of the babies were over 6 weeks. Most looked several months old. Many of them were quiet, some laughed. I can't remember if any of them cried.

It appeared that I was asking my parents and husband for opinions, but they never appeared in the dream, or even answered back. The only person whom I actually recognized in the dream was my grandmother, who asked me why I was adopting a child who was not a newborn, and she said she'd never adopt a baby that old ( this is something she would probably never say).

There were seveal people in the dream that I did not recognize- a man who worked for the "agency", and a woman holding a baby girl- I couldn't figure out if she was a birth mother or if he worked for the "agency".

I had a very difficult time in the dream figuring out which baby or babies I wanted to adopt. I felt calm in the dream, maybe even happy to be around the babies and possibly adopt some, but I also felt a bit as though I knew I was dreaming, and I was uneasy about it. I sort of woke up a couple times, but the dream continued when I fell back to sleep.

I am very disturbed because I want to get pregnant more than I want to take my next breath, but I feel as though I KNOW I never will. Is this a premonition of whats to come?? Please help me with some insight.