Hi all, I'm new to the forum so please let me know if there are details or other important things that can help with interpretation. Firstly, I'm a 23 year old male. I just graduated from college with a BS in Psychology. When I had this dream, I was in my last semester of college and I was going through some hardships with my girlfriend, who we'll refer to as Marie. She and I have been best friends for the better part of 6 years. Over these 6 years, we've been very interested in each other. We decided to make it official last spring. Shortly after, she moved in with me at college. When she moved in our relationship started to go down hill until it reached a point where I didn't know if I wanted to do it anymore. It seemed that I could no longer be myself and do the things that I wanted to do. I couldn't grow as a person and experience the things that I wanted to. It was during this time where we were in an in-between stage that I had this dream.

My dream was actually a dream within a dream. It starts out I'm going to this restaurant. I have a reservation. It's dinner with Marie. I'm a little early so I have to wait a bit. Now this restaurant is in like a Central Park type place. Some sort of outdoor restaurant with umbrellas and what not. (I've never been to Central Park or any place of that nature. I've only seen pictures and movies.) Off to the side, say 30 feet, is this cave/ditch/hole thing. For whatever reason I decide to go inside it. I figure I have time to wait until she gets here so I sit down and relax and I eventually fall asleep. Cue second dream.

Now in this dream I'm completely lucid, I can manipulate what I want and do what I wish, but I decide to let it play out just to see what happens. I live in this big city, New York or Chicago or something similar. [As far as I can tell, I don't know Marie] (I've always wanted to live in a city, as opposed to the small town I've been living in for the past 5 years) I have this close group of 5 or 6 friends. I don't think I actually know who these people are but they're the best friends a guy could ever have. I laugh with them, have fun, there's no drama whatsoever. It's amazing. I feel like I'm finally happy for once. In this group there is a girl named Alex. She has short brown hair and bright green eyes (think street sign green). [Side note: she's basically my ideal woman] The moment I meet her I felt this instant connection to her. Like she knew everything about me and I knew everything about her. It wasn't a romantic connection. It was a wholesome deep connection. Something I've never felt before. Almost like she completes me. We're inseparable. We go everywhere together and it's perfect. The dream goes on and I start to realize the dream is breaking down. It's just me and Alex in front of this flower shop. I start to see the buildings crumble ever so slightly. So I look to her knowing that there's something that she knows that I have to know. She has answers that I need. But I don't have time to ask what I need to. I ask her "will you stay with me? Will you be here the next time I fall asleep??" She looks at me so sadly and says "no, I can't. I'm your personification of your subconscious/consciousness." And as soon a she says that, I feel this profound pain. Not physical. Emotional. Like I had lost something that I could never get back. Like I wasn't whole anymore. I fall to my knees and start crying like I've never cried before. The 'pain' pervades through my very being. That connection I had that made me whole was gone and I wasn't sure I'd ever get it back. And all around me the dream is collapsing. Buildings start full on falling to the ground around me. And then it ends and I wake up in the cave. It's a year later. I go home and wondered what it all meant. And then that dream ends. I wake up and my heart is pounding and I feel so empty. I cried when I woke up, wanting to go back to sleep in hopes of seeing her again.

I go to sleep often, hoping and praying, that I will see her again. I haven't.

Well that's all I can remember about it. It still troubles me to this day. Again, if there are any details that could be helpful or if you have any questions, let me know. Thanks a lot for your help.

-duplex2128