Dream: the dream started out as me and my soon to be wife were in a space shuttle. she was the pilot and i was the co-pilot. the shuttle rockets took off and started towards the sky without any problems. when we reached the stratosphere, she said she didn't know how to fly the shuttle and that i needed to while she went to the bathroom. while she was in the restroom, i leveled off the shuttle to make the transition from earth to space much easier and safer. she returned and said she would be flying the aircraft while we were in space because it was easy. so i let her fly it and took my eyes away from the windshield. i felt the shuttle shutter violently and looked up through the windows and saw that we were back in earths atmosphere and were slowly heading back to earth as if we were landing a plane. out of nowhere, the aircraft went into a nose-dive.she was trying to regain control of it but wasn't strong enough so i took control and was pulling the aircraft up. it was starting to come out of the dive when i looked through the windshield and saw a huge rolling hill with beautiful green grass. i told her that i was going to pull the aircraft up and land it going up the hill so that the slope would help us slow down. as we got closer to the hill, i noticed that i wasn't going to be able to pull it up fast enough and the ground was coming at us very very fast. i turned to her and said 'i'm sorry babe... i love you with all my heart.' she looked at me and said, 'it's ok. i love you too.' i looked up through the window again to see how close the ground was and saw it right in front of us so i grabbed her hand. as i was turning to look at her, the aircraft slammed into the ground. everything stopped. there was no feeling, no thoughts, not images, just black. almost as if everything just shut off. then, what seemed like an eternity later, i found myself alone walking through a tunnel. i emerged from the mouth of the tunnel and walked out to a clearing in a field on a dreary cloudy day. someone appeared next to me and was just walking. i felt sad, depressed and lonely. i felt like i was searching for something but didn't know what. i knew that i had died and wasn't sad about that, but still didn't know what i was upset about. the guy walking next to me didn't say anything but i knew he wanted me to sit so i did. a playpen with dogs appeared in front of us and i was playing with the small dogs. the guy started talking to me and said i was in a better place so i asked him if i was in heaven and he didn't answer. so i looked at him and asked if i was in heaven. he was very dirty looking and generally unclean and said 'unfortunately not. but at least you aren't in hell either... we haven't made it that far yet. we'll just hang out here for a little.' i continued to play with the dogs. one of them started to bite the other one so i separated them. he went back to biting the other dog and hurting it so i pulled him by the back of the neck away from the other dog. again he went after the other dog so i grabbed his throat and pulled him away. the dog bit me and i got instantly mad and started squeezing the throat of the dog. the dog started to freak out and try to get free but i had a good hold on its throat and was squeezing harder and harder. out of nowhere, a bunch of my friends i had served with had grabbed me and pulled me away and were saying i was going to kill the dog. i started crying uncontrollably saying 'he bit me, i dont know what to do'

Significant Life Events: finances are on my mind frequently. i am getting married on july 30th. i'm scared that i won't be able to provide for my soon to be wife. we have minor arguments due to stress over finances.

Background: 24 / male / white / and employed at a corrections facility

Mental Illness Or Depression: PTSD and multiple TBIs from service in the Marine Corps

Location: southeastern ohio

Feelings About People: i love my wife to be more than anything in this world. we argue about money a lot because i want to prove to her i can take care of us and make everything work on a small income.

Relationship Status: about to be married.

When And How Often: first time ever on July 11 2016