My impression is that, you ARE special. You are holding in/back something. Something very useful. You refuse to give it merit or value, as its derived of you. And you believe you can only have as good as the station/life born into. And that reaching for more or better, even within that, is a fools mission. After all, its your idea..so how good can it be right? You CANT be the first to ever think it!

Well, its good/important enough for the rest of your brain to wait for sleep to ambush you...repeatedly...trying to get you to own it by telling you. As for "you cant die, your that special". I believe that would be brains way of offering a little piece of mind.

After all, when trying something brand new. What greater comfort is there, than to know it wont kill you?

(New to forums, and 1st post. Never done anything like this outside of for my friends/family. So if i have made any forum faux pas, please do let me know)