Staring into pretty girls' eyes, but they look away.

**The Blue Meanie** · 05-04-2006 09:46 PM

Hello! It's me again. This is my second post in this forum to have one of my dreams interpreted. I have a fair idea of what this dream means, but, I'd like to hear other people's opinions.

The Dream:

05-May-06 0440 // Non-lucid // Very high vividness // Long length // Standard Dream

Title: "Staring into Pretty Girls' Eyes"

This dream starts off as a bunch of people at a barbecue held by D T, a male freind of mine who lives in Australia. The barbecue is on the rooftop deck of a building, and I'm pretty sure it's a resteraunt I visited in Sydney once about three and a half months ago when I visited D T in Sydney.

Anyway, I'm there, obviously. There's a LOT of other people there who, at the time, I remember seeing quite clearly. The ones I can remember: D T is there himself, cooking dinner over the barbecue. R T, his father, who I respect immensely, is also there. Other than them, everybody else is female. Very pretty females as well, some of whom I recognise. There must be about 15-20 of these girls/women. I'll explain who they are later in "Background Information", as I think that's where that info should belong, to stop from interrupting the "flow" of this dream.

They're sitting and standing in a semicircle around me, all looking at me. This is very strange... they seem to be staring into my eyes, and waiting expectantly. Some are smiling, some look nervous. Anyway, I'm standing in front of them, and I make eye contact with the rightmost girl. I'm staring directly into her eyes, and after a few seconds, she looks away and blushes. She looks slightly embarassed and disappointed. I'm a bit disappointed, too, but, I turn my eyes to the left and stare into the eyes of the next girl.

At this time, I think D T, still cooking behind me on the barbeque, says we should have a game: a staring contest between me and the girls. This is what is already happeneing, so, I go along with it.

I stare into each girls' eyes in turn, and each one looks away, looking as disappointed and embarassed as the last. I remember seeing their eyes EXTREMELY clearly. All the girls' eyes were beautiful, and stunningly clear and colourful. This was by far the most vivid part of the dream, and something which had quite an effect on me. It was almost as if, by looking into their eyes, I was looking deep ibnto their souls, their minds, whatever you want to call it. All the girls look away, and none can withstand my scrutiny. This is disappointing, and I remember feeling quite dissatisfied.

At this point in time, D T and his father R T get into a big argument, and D T is sent to bed. Myself and the girls leave the party, and we're all a little drunk. There must be at least 15 of these girls. We're walking along a street that looks remarkably like Symond's Street that runs through my University. They all disperse as they make their way home. In a last-ditch effort, I ask a few of them to come with me to the supermarket, get some alcohol, and continue the party elsewhere. I think a few of them follow me, including the redhead, and a lovely part-maori girl who I don't recognise from real-life. I don't think this last epilogue part of the dream really matters all that much, and it didn't have much of an emotional effect on me. At this point the dream fades.

Background Information:

I'm 20, male, single, and not EXACTLY looking. I've never been involved in a serious romantic relationship, mostly because I'm very picky. I tend to adopt the attitude "Do it once, do it right". When I say "picky", I don't mean looks, either...

The girls in the dream:

One is an extremely pretty, pale redhead with pale green eyes who I saw, like, ONCE, on the bus a few days ago and remember thinking how attractive she was.

Another is J, a friend from University who I haven't had much contact with for about a year, because I haven't kept in touch as much as I should, even though she's in most of my classes and sits behind me... She's an asian girl, extremely pretty, and once in the past I was interested in her quite a lot, and asked her out. We went out, but nothing ever came of it. I think it's because, though she's a lovely friend, she's just not right for me.

Another woman in the group was S, an older woman from a psychology tutorial with... blue eyes, I think.

Another girl was E, a girl who is in my law classes along with J, and who, though I AM interested in, I don't really see myself going out with her... plus, I get the impression she's already taken. Nice girl, extremely intelligent, but... not for me.

There's lots of other women, as well, some of whom I recognised but can't remember, others who I've never seen before. At the time, their faces were all VERY clear, and their eyes were extremely clear and very, very, vivid. I would say, when compared to real-life, about 500% vividity. I know that sounds weird, but, their eyes just seemed more vivid than real-life. Weird.

So, yeah. I think I've already got a clear idea of what this dream means, but it seemed to be a very meaningful dream, so, I thought I'd post it here anyway to see what other people's responses are, and whether they match up with my own. Thanks!

**Distant Clone** · 05-04-2006 11:22 PM

Originally posted by The Blue Meanie
It was almost as if, by looking into their eyes, I was looking deep ibnto their souls, their minds, whatever you want to call it.

It seems to me they are all doing the same, looking inside of you for something, but not finding it. Basically, you are missing a component of yourself.

**think green** · 05-05-2006 05:56 PM

I'll give this a shot.

You feel that these women and women in general can see through you? (But his doesn't sound quite right because you say you are seeing through them.) That they can see things in you that cause them disappointment and embarrassment or is the whole idea of being stared at with such scutiny emb. & dis.? What are you disappointed and embarrassed about in your life? You seem to feel that they all see the same thing. It can't be too bad, because they still want to be around you. The ones that you recognize are ones you have rejected as possible relationship material. Are they disappointed and embarrassed because they find you attractive, but you have rejected them sexually. Wow. You're all the way in Australia, huh? Dog gone it! You could add one more to your string.

The other thing is that sometimes, eyes in dreams are wordplay on the personal pronoun, I, the self. So, these women have very clear eyes or maybe I's, selfs. They are women you respect? Strong women intellectually, psychologically. They know themselves well. Does this sound right? Maybe also, women whose opinion you respect. If their eyes are so much clearer in the dream, I assume that their eyesight is too. (eyesight - I sight?) But none can stand your scutiny. Literally. You say that at the end. So, you've turned your scutiny of them back on yourself. But, you know, it doesn't sound like that either.

You say that your not EXACTLY looking, but you're in a staring contest for God's sake with 15-20 women. My question is: what ARE you looking for? You are obviously a perfectionist, "Do it once. Do it right."

The thing is, I operate on the theory that dreams always tell you something you didn't know. They don't just rehash something you have accepted consciously. But what is this telling you?

You say a couple of times that you feel disappointment too; dissatisfied; "last ditch effort," but to do what?

The dream seems so blasted literal. Are all your dreams this literal? I'm trying to find a symbol here or some wordplay. Maybe all that you say in the end is what the dream is about.

I'll take another stab. You are, in the dream, trying to get to know women 2 ways: by staring and by drinking? In the dream, it doesn't work out well.

Cool dream. Sorry I couldn't help at all.

[/quote]

**The Blue Meanie** · 05-05-2006 08:39 PM

Cool dream. *Sorry I couldn't help at all. *

No, no, you've helped, definitely... certainly, your interpretaion is interesting.

Wow. *You're all the way in Australia, huh? *Dog gone it! *You could add one more to your string.

LOL! Nah. I'm in New Zealand. I was just VISITING my friend in Sydney.

You feel that these women and women in general can see through you? (But his doesn't sound *quite right because you say you are seeing through them.) That they can see things in you that cause them disappointment and embarrassment or is the whole idea of being stared at with such scutiny emb. & dis.? *

No, this isn't exactly it. In this dreams, as in ALL my dreams that are in the first-person, I'm the dominant character, and NEVER looked down upon. I'm not quite sure what this means. It's me who is looking through these women, not vice-versa. When they look away and are disappointed and embarassed, it's because they can't hold my gaze, not because they see something about me that makes them feel like that.

The ones that you recognize are ones you have rejected as possible relationship material. *Are they disappointed and embarrassed because they find you attractive, but you have rejected them sexually.

Yeah... see, this is sort of what I thought as well. I only know about three of the women from real-life, but even so, this is how it felt in the dream...

The other thing is that sometimes, eyes in dreams are wordplay on the personal pronoun, I, the self. *So, these women have very clear eyes or maybe I's, selfs. *They are women you respect? *Strong women intellectually, psychologically. *They know themselves well. *Does this sound right?

No... not exactly. I only know three of the women well enough from real-life to form an opinion on them... I respect one of them, but, she doesn't exactly fit the "eye = I" interpretation you just gave... Sorry, my bad. I should have given more details about these women for interpretation...

I'll take another stab. *You are, in the dream, trying to get to know women 2 ways: by staring and by drinking? *In the dream, it doesn't work out well.

LOL! Okay, funnily enough, I don't drink that often at all. In fact, I've only just recently started drinking on a very occaisional basis after having gone withouty alcohol for a good two years. I CERTAINLY don't look for women by drinking, or going to bars, pubs, etc.

You say a couple of times that you feel disappointment too; dissatisfied; "last ditch effort," but to do what?

I'm disappointed because none of these women can withstand my scrutiny... they all look away.

You say that your not EXACTLY looking, but you're in a staring contest for God's sake with 15-20 women. *My question is: what ARE you looking for? You are obviously a perfectionist, "Do it once. Do it right."

LOL! Whoa. Okay, dammit, this is probably the most useful part of your interpretation. Heh. Some things are just so obvious that you fail to see them, when it comes to interpreting your own dreams. Heh. Wow. Okay, maybe I AM looking.

What am I looking for? Ummmm... I'm not sure, exactly. I'll have to give that some serious thought.[/quote]

**think green** · 05-05-2006 10:17 PM

You're a dominant personality with high self esteem--sounds like. And you'd like to find an equal. How's that?

**poeticDreamer** · 05-05-2006 11:23 PM

May I?

I've read through all of the offered interpretations, and the ones you agree with go in the same general direction I was already leaning, so let's go with that...

The most important part of this dream, I think, is that the girls look away, and when I read your DJ when you posted this, I could totally picture a bunch of girls standing around you and turning away embarrassed or sheepish. It's not an uncommon occurance--it's one of those things your subconscious records...remember we talked about that? You may not always realize it, but you know how uncomfortable it can be to hold intense eye contact with someone for very long, especially someone you're attracted to.

My guess is that either

a. you're frustrated because you can't seem to find a girl who is your equal, or
b. you're chasing girls away by being too picky. I mean, think about it, here are a bunch of girls at a freaking barbecue, and you're "staring into their souls." Girls feel judgement harshly--even the possibility of rejection can cause women to do the stupidest things (and yes, I am speaking from experience). So if they feel that you are scrutinizing them, even if your scrutiny finds them "worthy," they're going to feel as if you're looking at all of their faults, and they will eventually...turn away.

There's my two and a half cents. (What? It's inflation!)

**Ryden** · 05-06-2006 12:54 AM

All the girls look away, and none can withstand my scrutiny[/b]

You need to look no further than the above quote. You have a bunch of fine options in front of you, yet your nature doesn't let you keep anything going with them. In my opinion the embarassed look is due to them "not being good enough" for your tastes, and therefore they are embarrased.

The walk home/epilogue- the number of girls dwindles, and you start trying to keep them around. It is your mind playing with the idea that if the scrutiny continues, you might end up with noone.

Just my two cents.
Advice (take it or leave it): expand your horizons, experiment a little

**The Blue Meanie** · 05-06-2006 01:05 AM

Originally posted by Ryden
The walk home/epilogue- the number of girls dwindles, and you start trying to keep them around. It is your mind playing with the idea that if the scrutiny continues, you might end up with noone.

Ah! This is interesting. I hadn't thought of this, and you're probably right. Yeah... okay, thinking back on the dream, that sounds right.

I'll take the interpretaion. Whether I'll take the advice... hmmmm. Remains to be seen.

But thanks anyway, your interpretation of the "epilogue" was extremely helpful.

**harvey3000** · 05-07-2006 06:18 AM

My interpretation is different than the others. To me the girls are taking a break from leering guys and invite you in their circle and play a game that shows you how they feel inside about guys sometimes who embarrass them because women have slightly more refined minds.

**harvey3000** · 05-07-2006 06:19 AM

My interpretation is different than the others. To me the girls are taking a break from leering guys and invite you in their circle and play a game that shows you how they feel inside about guys sometimes who embarrass them because women have slightly more refined minds.

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