Laura's Dream Journal

[citizennumber3]

I've finally decided to start a dream journal. After about a month of absolutely no lucid dreaming, I'm getting a tad frustrated. But I haven't really been doing too much to help myself, so it's my own fault. I'd been doing reality checks occasionally and telling myself each night before bed, "I'm going to be lucid tonight" and I never am. So, perhaps, this journal will help push me in the direction of lucidity. I'd like to forewarn anyone reading this: There are some people whose dreams do make a little sense, are sometimes easy to understand, and follow a linear plot. I am not one of these people. My dreams are the crazy kind--jump around constantly, make very little sense. Consider yourself warned. The following is a conglomerate of dreams I had the night before last. I've decided, instead of writing a full-blown journal after waking up from every dream, I've just (groggily) written down keywords on a piece of paper on the endtable next to my bed. I will try to assemble these keywords into something psuedo-coherent. September 8th-9th keywords: Mill, Rachel P., Gerbil, Parking, Fountain PART I. I suppose the first thing I remember about this dream was being with a group of girls I'm familiar with, but not exactly close friends with. We were walking through this building that resembled in the inside of a barn. There was light pouring down from a small window several feet above us. There was this woman sitting on a stool below the window, sitting in front of this vat of water which contained clothing. We walked out of the building, and on the outside it looked like a windmill. I do remember one girl's face, and this girl was Rachel, someone who I have in all of my classes at school right now (we're both seniors in high school. I'm 17 years old.) So Rachel and I, along with the others, had to feed this tube-like thing in through the small window so that the woman could get ahold of it (it had a totally purposeless funnel on the woman's end) and water poured through the tube and into her vat. I have absolutely no idea what this could symbolize in my waking life; I can't remember what emotion I was feeling at the time. But it was sunny outside, we seemed to be in lush, green country. There was a tree near us, but the rest was a huge field and you could see rolling hills beyond. The sky was a beautiful blue filled with puffy clouds. PART II. The next part is hazier, though I'm sure it followed the previous part. There was this gerbil--and I'm almost positive it was a gerbil, yet it was more the size of a guinea pig (but it definitely closer resembled a gerbil.) And it was running through this tall grass. My mother and I were weeding a garden; everything was shady and cool. This "garden" was below a canopy of trees. The grass had a blue tint to it--which is not to say it was entirely blue--it was green, but there was also a hint of blue in it. So this gerbil was running through the tall grass, darting around our ankles, and then running out into the open, heading toward another cluster of trees. I think there were some cars parked on a gravel driveway alongside this stretch of grass. Our garden may have been beside a house, and underneath an extension of the houses roof. I do not remember. But the focus of this part of the dream was on the gerbil, anyway. After waking up I thought that cute animals may be one of my dream symbols. My family only has one cat, and it took my sister and I years to convince our parents to adopt her. Ever since, I know I've wanted to adopt more pets. I really do love animals. But our parents just won't go for it. So I often dream about adopting adorable animals. However, this guinea pig-sized gerbil, now that I think of it, could possibly be a manifestation of an actual guinea pig I had before we adopted our cat--her name was Peanutbutter because, well, that was the color of her fur. And I associate gerbils with having that color of fur. Perhaps that's why I wrote down "gerbil" when I woke up. But, now that I think of it, it must've been a guinea pig instead. PART III. The parking lot. It looked to me like we were instead a canyon of sorts--high plateaus of grassless land all around us. It looked dead and barren. The sky above was still blue--but this "parking lot" was no longer in the countryside--it was in the middle of a desert. Also, I think there was a huge fountain covering one side of the canyon. All I remember of this scene is backing out in a green car (a Hyundai, maybe??? I don't know) and then driving down this very steep slope. ...That's about all I remember.

[citizennumber3]

September 9th-10th keywords: Restaurant, "Are You Being Served?", Karen = "pink hair lady", Bathroom, Aziza, Ted, Kalee, Amanda, Laura's Birthday, Snow, Shopping, Flight somewhere, Packing, CDs and Purse. PART I. The shopping mall. I'm trying to think of a way to describe it...It was nothing like the mall we have where I live--our mall is dark, the majority of the light coming from skylights placed far apart. It can feel like you're underground sometimes. My dream mall was extremely bright. It was spacious and the walls were white, and the only place I think of that it sort of felt like was this shop they have in Heathrow, only whiter and emptier. My friends and I (I can only remember Aziza, Ted, Kalee and Amanda being there, but there were probably others) were browsing through one of the shelves. It was my birthday (in the dream) and we were just hanging out...in the mall...which is weird, because I hate shopping. Anyway, we look to our left and everything is a lot more croweded. Suddenly that part of the mall is much darker than that store we're standing in, and everything on our left seems to be tinted red. There are no walls or doors or anything...the stores boundaries are the colors of their floor tiles and paint on their walls, as well as the items in them. So, they are defined, but you can see everywhere. PART II. Suddenly I'm not longer with my friends, but am by myself, heading over to this restaurant that's part of the mall. I go up to this woman standing behind a counter. She is Karen, a woman I've worked with in the community theater group in real life--she has a daughter who is my age, and two other daughters were are involved in the theater group as well. Karen (in the dream) has pink hair, and reminds me of the woman in that British comedy, "Are You Being Served?" In waking life, the night before I had this dream, my father was watching that show on PBS and I only caught about two seconds of it. I have no idea why it would have such an influence on my dream. Anyway, I don't want to eat anything, I merely need to use the restroom. What happens next is easy enough to explain, as I've had SO many of these dreams before: in real life I need to go to the bathroom, but I'm asleep, so this translates one way or another into my dream. Usually in one of two ways: either I can't find the bathroom, or people are watching / interrupting me so that I can't go. Anyway, back to this dream: I'm in their bathroom. But, remember, there are no walls. So people are walking right through, walking through the bathroom to get to their tables. And I'm embarrassed as heck, as you can probably imagine. There is a feeble attempt to separate the rooms--there's a sort of island between the back room and the bathroom, and sort of fence between the bathroom and the restaurant. Most people are walking around these barriers, but one couple decides to hop over both to get to their table--giving me the impression that they weren't supposed to be there at all. Eventually I give up and wake up and heed the call of nature. PART III. Back with my friends. We're outside of the store now, and we're walking back to my house (a long trek) through the snow. But it's okay. I'm not frustrated by this--I enjoy spending more time with them. The snow is beautiful in the dream. Everything is white and crisp, and, yes, cold, but I just don't mind one bit. We eventually do make it to my house (but I think there was a "let's catch the bus!" episode in between...that I don't really remember, but have a vague sense that it might have occured. I often have those kinds of dreams for some reason. I'm always missing the bus, or just barely making it on. A bus may be another dream symbol.) Anyway, we eventually make it back to my house and have my birthday party. We're down in the basement, but it looks like it did when I was a kid. Since then, in real life, we've redone it and furnished it and it looks nice now. But it was in it's "unfinished" state in my dream. PART IV. I remember near to nothing about this part of the dream. We (not sure who "we" is) were headed on a plane trip to somewhere and I was packing for the trip, trying to find all of my CDs so I could put them in my purse to listen to on the plane. Yep, that's about all I remember. This may have something to do with what happened in real life: I went to London over the summer with a bunch of people from school. But on my way through one of the security checks in Boston I got pulled aside. Apparently my mp3 player was at a "strange angle" in my purse and they had to look through it and swab the inside of my purse. Maybe my subconcious was trying to tell me, "bring CDs next time" lol.

[citizennumber3]

September 10th-11th No dreams that I remember from last night. But I wanted to make a note of this so I can learn more about my dream / dream recall habits. I was reading 1984 for A.P. English class until 12:30 a.m. before finally turning the light out. Before this last week I hadn't made a concious effort of noticing when I have the most dreams, when my dream recall is at its best, and turns out...this is common knowlege, I know...my dream recall is at bad to nonexistant when I don't get enough sleep. I woke up at 6:30 a.m. and was surprisingly awake and alert. Getting up at 7:45 a.m. on normal days I feel groggy and stubbornly stay in bed as long as possible. How weird is that? So the conclusion for last night: I'm sure I dreamt, but I have absolutely no recollection of my dreams, but I woke up feeling considerably and relatively chipper.

[Jess]

September 10th-11th I woke up at 6:30 a.m. and was surprisingly awake and alert. Getting up at 7:45 a.m. on normal days I feel groggy and stubbornly stay in bed as long as possible. How weird is that?[/b] Hey, that's probably because you're waking up from different stages of sleep at 06:30 and 07:45. If you feel groggy and want to go back to sleep you're waking up from deep non-REM sleep. If you feel awake then you've just been in a lighter non-REM sleep or dreaming in REM sleep. We go back and forth from dreaming to deep sleep every 90 minutes or so. Try getting up at 07:30 or 08:00. Hope you don't mind me posting, I wasn't sure if it was a rhetorical question or not!

[citizennumber3]

No, I don't mind you posting at all--that makes sense, thank you for telling me. However, I'm afraid I don't have much control over when I wake up each morning. My life is dictated by school. I have a driver's ed. class at 7:30 on Mondays, Wednesday and every other Friday. On Tuesdays and Thursdays and every other Friday my classes start at 8:45. So I have to wake up according to when I need to be at school (I'm not a morning person, so if I can avoid getting up at 6:30ish twice a week, I will take that opportunity)--usually it takes me 45 minutes to an hour (or so) to get ready in the morning. And on weekends I enter the Great Eternal Sleep. Such is the life of a teenager.

[Jess]

Could try changing it from the other end: go to sleep earlier/later.

[citizennumber3]

This is true. However, with community theater rehearsals going from 6:30 to 9:00 each night as well as a mountain of homework for two A.P. classes, I don't know if I'll have much more control...I mean, if I decide to go to bed at 11 every night, and one night I've still got 50 pages left of "Hamlet," I think I'm going to try to finish the homework. I'm not trying to disregard your ideas--they're very good suggestions--but, like I mentioned earlier, my life is very scheduled and structured by outside forces. School, theater, my parents, etc. Dreaming and understanding my dreams is important to me--but not as important as those things.

[citizennumber3]

September 11th to 12th Keywords: St. Paul's; Rain; Amanda runs other way; Roof / Shelter; Airplane; Book; H. C. Movie; 2 Boys; Steph S., S. W., Sonya all quit my show; Doreen; Shopping Carts. PART I. The first part of the dream I remember (solely because I wrote down these words) was standing on an elevated platform of some sort. It was a part of this huge building that I felt might have been some huge museum or church. It reminded me of St. Paul's Cathedral. My friend, Amanda, and I were on this rooftop/platform thing and it began to rain. Not huge drops that soak you instantly--but thin, spear-like drops cascading down. Not lightly, exactly...but not exactly a heavy rain, either. I went to run underneath this canopy-type part of the building. But instead of coming me, Amanda ran in the other direction, out into the rain. PART II. Somehow I went from that dream to another. I don't remember much else from this dream but being inside this small jet with these two boys. It took me FOREVER to remember what "H.C." meant. Then, after much reflection and frustration, I realized it stood for "Holden Caulfield." These two boys reminded me of Holden, and of the boys in A Separate Peace. I was somehow in competition with them. I mean, we were friends it seemed, but very competitive with one another. I'm a writer in real life, and it felt like all three of us were playwrights jealous of each other's work. I'm not really sure how the "movie" part of this fits in with the dream. I don't remember that part. Maybe we were all trying to write a screenplay and only one could be chosen for production? I honestly don't remember. PART III. Like I said, I'm a writer in real life. I once directed one of my one-act plays and it was difficult getting my friends to take direction from me. So, in my dream, I dreamt that three girls I know in real life (Stephanie S., Stephanie W., and Sonya--all "S" names...how odd!...I'm not best friends with any of them, but I am friends with them to some extent) were all working on one of my shows. We were standing on the lawn of my neighbor's house (the house across the street from Sonya's house) having an argument with them. They all dropped out of my play at the last minute. Somehow we skip to me going up to the door of my other neighbor (the Thorpe's house) and, instead of one of the Thorpes, Stephanie S.'s mom answers the door, and says very coldly that her daughter has quit and doesn't want to be involved. Flash back to the three girls again, and they're walking down from the lawn towards the main road, pushing shopping carts in front of them. I'm pretty sure the carts were empty. I made an angry comment while following them, along the lines of, "My first cast didn't need shopping carts! They carried everything on their own! You are usless!" lol. I don't remember what I said word for word, but that was basically the message I was trying to get across. (Also, for the record: went to bed at 11:30 p.m., woke up at 7:50 a.m.)

[citizennumber3]

September 12th to 13th I do not remember the dreams from last night. I forgot them upon waking. However, unlike the other day, I do remember having dreams. I just don't recall what they were about.

[citizennumber3]

September 16th to the 17th I do not remember the beginning of this dream, nor the dreams that followed it, but I did try my best to commit the ending to memory. I remember walking through this building--I don't think it had a roof, and possibly only one wall--the only one in view--but had the effect of being closed off and dark. This could very well be a dream sign--it seems that buildings in my dreams have very hazy boundaries--usually they are defined by color and light/darkness, rather than walls. Anyway, this one visible wall had an opening in it--a doorway, but no door...if that makes any sense. As a stark contrast to the dark building, you could see lovely scenery outside. Lots of sharp green hills. I was walking with my mother through this building, and I had a bicycle with me. I wanted to go and ride my bike over these hills--but it was too crowded. There was some sort of fair or festival taking place, and the entire area was crowded by people--most of them on bicycles, but many of them walking around. There were probably little kiosks scattered here and there, but I don't have a very good memory of the logistics. So, instead of risking riding my bike out into this crowd, my mom and I turned back the way we came. Somehow we wound up in the building's restoom (of course, in real life, nature was calling--doesn't it always work that way? Seems I need to drink less water or something.) So my mom stood outside the door, and I went inside. What happened next, I believe, was the result be being partially lucid--if that's even possible. I think I was getting bored with the dream, and wanted something interesting to happen. For some reason I had my mom's glasses in the pocket of this white button-up shirt I was wearing. I figured if they fell into the toilet some hilarious plot might ensue. So I spent about a minute, weighing the pros and cons of "accidentally" dropping the glasses, and finally decided it was just too funny a prank to pass up. So I materialized a quarter that was slightly behind the toilet. I went into the stall, and leaned over the toilet to pick up the quarter. And I think that's about the time I woke up. So, I'm a bit confused. I don't think I was completely lucid--just like one can be half-awake, I think I was half-lucid. I spent some time after I woke up debating this in my mind, and I decided that I definitely was aware to some extent that it was a dream and I had control. How else would I have willed that quarter into existence? I've never done that before in a dream. Hooray! I reached partial lucidity! I'm going to put all the lucid parts of my dreams into blue text from now on. (Being a synesthete, I associate the color blue with the word "lucid" for some reason.)

[citizennumber3]

I know, I've been majorly slacking with the dream journal thing. But now that community theatre started up, life has become instantly stressful. Two A.P. classes (with other classes, not to mention) also rehearsal from 6:30-9 every night, lines to learn, three books to read, and I've started exercising regularly for at least 45 minutes every afternoon after school, which takes up yet more time. Plus there are colleges to apply to, senior pictures and forms to fill out, etc, etc, etc. However, there is one dream I had on: September 18th to 19th which is worth mentioning. I remember very little about it (surprise, surprise) but I DO remember having this one substitute teacher teaching a class in the dream. I think it was a social studies class in this dream. I felt a sort of anxiety. Probably feeling overwhelmed with school work. This substitue is a regular (her husband used to be a teacher at the school) and she has possibly the worst name anyone could ever get stuck with: Gay Butts. I'm dead serious. That is, in real life, her true name. Well, anyway--I dreamt that she was substituting for this s.s. class, and no one knew what they were supposed to be doing, and I was having difficulty understanding the assignment. You wanna know the freakiest part? The VERY next day in REAL LIFE (that would be yesterday--Tuesday the 19th) in my Web Page Design class, who else but Mrs. Butts came in to substitute!!! None of us had any idea what we were supposed to be doing, and I was considerably frustrated. So, in essence, my dream became a reality. I've never had a prophetic dream before. So this is highly fascinating to me. I wonder if I'll start having more of these types of dreams--that'd be neat. Or, maybe it was just a strange coincidence. Anyway, I'll try my best to keep this updated (I know--its purpose is to help me, not to really keep anybody else informed) but I can't promise anything. Life is getting rather hectic as of late.

[citizennumber3]

September 24th to 25th WHOA! Okay, I've had dreams about fighting with my father before, and dreams about my mother dying, but this one takes the cake! Though it was extremely unpleasant, and it didn't last very long I was LUCID at the end of it!!!! Okay, the first thing I remember was sitting in our kitchen at the table with my sister. She was making a poster, writing in yellow and purple marker. Apparently our kitchen was playing host to her art class, and the teacher was letting me teach one part of the class. Before the other kids came, I assured my sister that I was going to explain to the children that I wasn't looking for any specific product, and that they wouldn't have any creative boundaries because art is not about thinking inside the box. She seemed so relieved and thanked me, because a lot of the kids (herself included) wanted to point that out to their art teacher, but were too shy. I told her that's exactly why I was going to tell the entire class right off the bat--I was shy and passive at one point too. But after the other kids joined us and got their projects underway, the real art teacher stepped in and insisted they do this weird wood carving things. They were sticks with a carved image on the top, meant to be lawn ornaments on some sort. Many of the kids depicted Christ on the cross in their carvings (ironically, I know.) But I settled for a nature scene. We stuck the sticks in our backyard, and my father appeared out of nowhere. I explained to the art teacher that my family's Catholic, but I'm Toaist and I've only been going to church to respect their beliefs (which is truly the situation in real life) and my father handled the situation very tongue-in-cheek. When the art teacher left, he started to yell at me. I stayed behind in the woods while he walked up towards the deck of the house, walking up the steps. He disappeared into the house for a moment, but came back with a loaded gun. Our cat was sitting on the deck when he came out, and he instantly pumped her full of lead, her bloody corpse lying at his feet. I raced up to the house, fear and anger gripping my throat, and began to yell at him. He threatened to shoot me, but part of me knew he must be bluffing. Eventually he put the gun down, and I picked it up. We continued to argue, I aimed the gun at him for self defense, but didn't intend to kill him. My mother, hearing the noise, rushed outside and pleaded with us to drop the gun and stop arguing. I put it down, not wanting to hurt anybody, but my father grabbed it back up and began threatening to shoot us both. By this time we had walked in through the back door and were standing in the kitchen. (The strange part is, the deck in the dream led straight to the kitchen like it did when I was a child. When I was about 12ish, my family added on a mudroom in real life because, I mean, we live in Vermont. A mudroom is pretty much essential.) I hit behind the side of the house, watching cautiously through the window, into the kitchen. I had managed to leave, the the arguement had really heated up between my parents. He threatened her again, and then he did it. He shot at her at least five times, blood flying everywhere, her body instantly collapsing and falling to the floor. By this time I was crying uncontrollably and shaking by the side of the house. Then I realized--"I must be dreaming; this can't be happening!" And sure enough, I realized it was all a dream. I knew I was lucid, but I was so upset and depressed that I didn't really want to be in the dream any longer. Who wants to be around a homicidal father? I was also kind of curious about how it felt to die. So I jumped out from behind the side of the house, into his line of sight. He instantly shot at me, and the bullets ripped through my skin. But by the first bullet, all I could see was the color blue. The sensation was like each bullet was a drop of ice-cold water tearing through me, and eventually it felt like I was swimming under freezing water. Visually, the only way I can describe it, was like seeing a bunch of blue butterflies just scattering away in all directions. I guess that's how my mind interpreted dying. I woke up and my body ached unbearably, but the pain slowly faded. I instantly wrote down the entire dream in a notebook on my nightstand. I'm still considerably shaken by the whole experience.

[citizennumber3]

Two lucids only about a week apart--it's almost too good to be true. I doubt I'll be having too many more in the near future. But here's to hoping. September 26th to 27th The first thing I remember was sitting in the high school auditorium. Our director, John, was up on stage explaining that we were going to do a show, and I got the feeling is was a show for Halloween or something. I half-heartedly suggested "Rocky Horror Show" and, to my complete surprise, we ended up doing just that. Before I knew it, I was up on stage in a Columbia costume, singing for all I was worth. And my throat was killing me. (I have a cold right now in real life--probably how my throat pain got translated into the dream.) Cut to a semi-related event. There's a bunch of high school kids up on the stage, performing a half-assed rendition of some other musical. They can't act, and it's sort of painful to watch. However, the entire auditorium is packed--standing room only--and I am sharing a seat with this guy I used to have classes with in elementary school: Nick Benson. I'm pretty sure that's his name. (In real life I think he must've moved--I remember disliking him as a kid, and then he just sort of evaporated when I had my head turned in jr. high. Or maybe he's still around and I just never see him. Maybe he's changed so much I don't recognize him.) But, anyway, I'm sitting...not on his lap...but between his legs, and his hands are casually resting on my waist. His eyes are on the stage, but I get the sense he's more focussed on me. And I also get the sense that he's drunk, somehow. Cut to the lobby. (It is dream lobby I have seen before in other dreams--based mostly on our high school lobby, with influences from all over the place. Some of it reminds me of this high school in Maine we went to for the New England Drama Festival my freshman year.) I'm searching for Aziza and somebody else (I think it was Kalee--possibly Hayley or Brittany) and I'm searching for my coat. It's raining outside. I just want to tell Aziza (and the other) about Nick and how blatantly sexual his actions were. I also want to find my coat and leave. It's a green sweater, actually, not a coat. But I can't find anyone or anything because it's so crowded in the lobby. I push my way around halls--the building is nothing like anything in reality, but parts of it remind me of buildings I know I've seen in other dreams before. I can't remember what happened after that. I think that was the end of that dream.

[citizennumber3]

September 28th-29th I never wrote anything down about this dream, but I did try to replay as much of it as possible once I woke up. I still remember bits and pieces of it. So, here goes... In this dream, I was much younger than I am now. I get the sense that was anywhere between 10 and 13. I was in the woods with this girl, and, more than anybody else, she most resembled Nicole Kimball--a neighbor of a friend of mine. She's a few years younger than me in real life, but extremely short and tiny. Let's just call her Nicole, even though I don't think it was her, exactly. So, Nicole and I were in the woods. It was a crisp, but sunny autumn day. The entire area was orange and yellow and brown--vibrant. Not dead. Or dying. We were running around in the woods (we also ran in and around this tree house/wood cabin-type place. Like most buildings in my dreams, I don't think this structure had a roof.) It wasn't clear what were running from. It seemed like we were just goofing around. Then these boys (at least two or three of them...it might have been more, I don't remember) started chasing after us. It all seemed like a harmless game of tag for the first few second, but quickly I became deeply threatened. Nicole and I, though it seemed all fun and games, were really running for our lives. From the boys. But from one boy in particular--he was like a shorter, smaller, younger version of Gary Brolsma ("Numa Numa" guy) and we knew he could do considerable damage if he got hold of us. At one point we found my mom's car (a car, in real life, my parents just traded in for a newer Toyota) and we were inside of it, trying to get away from the boys. But the big one (we'll just call him Gary) was pounding on the windows with his fists. We thought he might actually break through the windows, so we hurriedly dashed out of the car. With some quick thinking, I made sure to lock all of the doors so they couldn't get in. Nicole and I ran down a small, tree-filled valley in the woods, and stood upon a couple of stumps. The stumps were right in front of a bush full of yellow leaves. We took off the sweaters we had been wearing, revealing yellow shirts, and we stood there, camouflaged. But as the boys ran down the embankment, they only ran by us once, and then instantly backed up and spotted us. We darted away again. I'm sure the chase scene lasted for eons longer than I've described. But now we cut to the elementary school, and things are very crowded. It's spring suddenly, the ice and snow almost completely melted. There are little glistening streams running through the fresh new grass. I spot Kalee, and she reveals that she's just broken up with her boyfriend, Dan. Somehow this means that I can start dating Chris...I know, it makes no sense. Suddenly Chris and I are walking next to one of the little streams of melted ice, holding hands, talking and laughing and smiling. (Chris and I did "date" once. Okay...it was only one date...but...we got to be good friends and I really like the guy. But it was unrequitted love. Unrequitted "like"...not love. But, anyway, I did have feelings for the guy at one point in ancient history. Things were awkward between us for a while, but lately we've gone back to be normal. We'r good friends again.) Cut to a completely different area of the school. A bunch of kids. Apparently it's "show and tell day: pets edition" because tons of kids have their pets with them. I glance over and find that my cat, Nemo, in cartoon manner, is being swallowed whole by some other kid's python. (I love my cat, and this part of the dream seriously disturbed me.) I ran over, choking the python, trying to get it to regurgitate my cat (she was only half-swallowed; her eyes were big and I can't think of any way to describe them other than "cartoonish"...she looked like something straight out of a Saturday morning kid's show. Her eyes did, anyway.) And that's about when I woke up. Deeply distressed. I gave Nemo extra hugs this evening.

[citizennumber3]

There's something creepy going on around here... October 14th to 15th In this dream, I was looking at a video. Apparently, in this video, there was supposed to be a ghost somewhere, but after watching it the first time, I didn't see anything unusual. The film footage was a quick clip--it seemed to be set in a park during some sort of medieval festival in England. There was a procession walking down this little stone path while others watched--one woman in costume with a sweeping skirt walked by, and, what appeared to be a yeoman warder, was standing in front of a bench. f I replayed the video, and actually saw something the second time. It was a blip of blue on the bench. I played it again, slowing it down. Eventually I saw that it was a transparent, blue-tinted apparition of some young man, who seemed to be in his mid-20s, and looked a tiny bit, to me, like Tom Kenny. Suddenly it was no longer a video--I was actually inside the scene, watching that ghost on the bench. Soon all I could see was his face. When I looked closely at him, he turned into an older man (mid-40s, early 50s) and looked, as best as I can describe him, a tiny bit like Andrew Lloyd Webber. He was giving me this sarcastic look that. I thought, perhaps, the look seemed to say, "I'm right here--why aren't you doing anything? Oh, typical. How typical." Then, he turned away from me, and I thought it was because he thought I couldn't see him. He lay back down into this younger man's body--he became the young man again. I feel like I'm missing an important element of the dream right here, but the next thing I remember is the ghost man standing up, walking from the bench, and standing behind the yeoman warder. Then he actually stepped INTO the warder in front of him, and the look on the guard's face was that of sheer shock and horror, but utter helplessness. His mouth opened slightly, and the consonant sound, "Ss" came from his lips. Almost as if he were fighting the words back down his throat. He said: "Ss--Send Help!" He yelled it at the top of his lungs. At this time I woke up, shaking, trying to figure out what to do. I started yelling in my head, whispering out loud, "I don't even know where you are! I don't even know where you are!" And I then I got the most extreme shivers of my life. My entire body was consumed by tingling shivers--and I wasn't even cold. It would appear to me that his response to my question was, "Right here." Spirits have a way of doing that--I don't think they get into your body, really...but they get into your mind. Or they meet you halfway on some overlapping dimension. I'm not entirely sure. But I've talked "to dead people" for as long as I can remember, so the experience isn't new to me. I tend to get pretty bad shivers when the spirit I'm talking to is inside my mind or this other "dimension"; it's happened before. But NEVER unexpectedly, in a dream. This is what frightened me. Who in the heck is this guy? I know it was a dream, it certainly wasn't an OBE (at least...I don't *think* it was...) but this guy got inside my head and obviously wanted help for some reason. But after I had woken up, I basically told him to "Go away; I can't help you." And after a moment more of shivering, I'm pretty sure he left. I got the feeling that he expected me to help him, like I was running some sort of Spirit Help Desk or something...??? Creepy. I wonder if there's a real video out there somewhere. Or if anyone knows more about him. Based on the VERY real shivering, knowing of his presence, I can honestly say this was a real dead guy with a real problem.

[Man of Shred]

crazy. i get presences in my room at night all the time. sometimes i have a dream of the presence. in one instance i awoke and whoever i had the dream with was still in my room. i talked to him and saw him clearly as day. like i was dreaming awake. it's on pg4 of my dream journal if your interested BTW. they might be undead. but also there are astral beings that seek us out in dreams. they can follow us into the daily you might not feel them. sometimes you might see them briefly in your periphials. sometimes you have to stalk these presences. if you feel they are harmfull then stay away from them. if they seem friendly, make a pact with them. Edit: I love your detail BTW! you have good recall!

[citizennumber3]

Long time, no post. But this one's pretty cool, so I thought I'd write it down in here. (There are parts where it seems a little...trippy...) December 10th to 11th I only remember bits and pieces of my dreams that night. I'll try to break them up into sections. PART I I was in my living room, standing on furniture while I sang "Rent" tunes with a guy and a gal playing Roger and Mimi. They resembled (but weren't exactly) Declan Bennett and Krystal Brown--the Roger and Mimi in the current "Rent" tour cast. (In real life my friend Tyler and I saw the show, and got to meet these two--along with Harley Jay (Mark) and Jade (an ensemble member / Alexi Darling) and they're just sweet, sweet people.) I was trying to sing over them, because I couldn't hear myself, and that irritated them. We were all competing to be the loudest...and that's about all I remember. PART II Um...can't remember much of this part. All I really remember is sitting REALLY high up, on this wicked-tall building in the city. Normally I'd be afraid of heights, but we've got a canopy over us and a railing in front of us, so I'm not too worried. I was sitting there with my (real life) friends, Tyler and Stephanie. On the other side of the street, there is this biodome-like building. Not that it's a dome...but it's housing these odd plants. Through an enormous window we can see all of these trees--they look like palm trees sort of, but their bottoms are exposed and they have no roots--the bottoms are completely rounded and yellowish. They are hanging in this huge net, so that their bottoms are suspended above the floor (if there is a floor--I don't remember seeing one.) Suddenly, later on in the dream, they start falling through the nets and (I guess there must've been a floor after all) because they start bouncing up and down like rubber balls. And somehow this was my/Tyler's/Stephanie's fault. (TRIPPY TRIPPY TRIPPY.) PART III New York City...(center of the universe )...um...it was New York, only not. More like a cross between Montreal and London, actually. Narrow streets, smaller buildings, lots of brown-earth-tones (as opposed to blindingly metallic skyscrapers.) Anthony Rapp was there, standing in the middle of a plaza. Adam Pascal was standing on top of a very tall ladder for almost no apparent reason (I told you this dream was sort of trippy.) Cut to me, walking around with this 19/20-something college girl who is a total stranger. I don't remember taking any photos of her, but in my dream "memory" I "know" that I had taken a picture of her with Anthony. Later on I'm in the passenger seat of her mini-van, and she is driving us through the crowded, narrow streets. I ask her for her e-mail so that I can send her the pictures of her and Anthony. She tells me that her name is Kaitlin and gives me her school e-mail--she explans that she's at Penn State. The first thing I think of is an old friend of mine from real life--Stephen--who is an graduate student at PSU, studying astrophysics. Okay, now here's the cool/interesting/mildly amusing part of it--in real life, I did a Google search on "Kaitlin Penn State" and there is, apparently, an actual Kaitlin at the school, studying physics. Now, that's probably not an enormous peculiarity--same name, same school: big deal. It's probably a coincidence. But what if this girl and I were actually sharing a dream? That'd be pretty neat...and extremely random. Not likely. But I can speculate, can't I? December 11th to 12th I should just briefly mention the dream I had last night, as it was quite disturbing/hilarious. It also involves Tyler. Our friend, Jayden, was having a birthday party. He had invited Tyler and I, Matt, Brandy, and a bunch of the older/college kids I rarely see/talk to anymore. His house, apparently, had a million floors because we kept going down flight after flight of stairs. Jayden's mom was with us. (Which was strange, because, in real life, his parents are divorced and his mother lives in Florida while he has been living here in Vermont with his dad, and is now going to St. Mike's college.) Each new floor looked vaguely familiar to me, but they weren't all from the same house. It's hard to explain. Anyway, after going down and down and down...we reached this cave-like basement (seriously, everything was dirt. We were underground.) On one side of the cave there were steps that led up to this enormous TV screen, and below it was a control panel. For Jayden's birthday, Tyler had gotten him this enormous, life-like video game. Jayden was thrilled, obviously. We went back upstairs (and by upstairs, of course, I mean up *several* stairs.) We sat down at the kitchen table for cake (which, wasn't in a kitchen...our environment was outdoors somewhere. Maybe by a beach. I don't remember.) I was flustered, because I hadn't gotten Jayden anything/wasn't sure what to get him. So I took off my bra and underwear and gave it to him (AHHH--wtf, mate?! Did I mention I did this while remaining fully clothed at all times--the magic of dreams, ladies and gentlemen&#33 That amused him. Then all of the other girls at the party decided to do the same thing, offering up their undies to him. ??!! I think this may symbolize my current frustration with Christmas...I want to get my friends gifts, but I'm a broke kid about to enter college. So I was going to make something crafty and personal for my friends. Maybe this dream is trying to tell me that making something intimate for them will amuse them, but may make me rather embarrassed...? Not that I should be. But perhaps, in my subconcious, I feel guilty for not being able to buy them decent crap. Ooooooooooooooooooooh commercialism.

[citizennumber3]

Man, it's been a long time since I've posted on here. But, with school and work and extra curriculars and worrying about the fine details that graduation and getting ready for college entails--things have been a little stressful lately (but, then again, when are they not?) My dream recall abilities have gone down the crapper, quite frankly. It's been really difficult for me to remember dreams lately...it's awful. I've never been this terrible. Now it's like I wake up and entirely forget the dream the second I open my eyes--if I'm lucky, I clasp onto a couple of keywords that spark my memory of a small portion of the dream. Below I want to summarize one small portion I recall from last night's dream--ephemeral as the dream was, this part really sticks out in my mind for some reason. May 17th to the 18th There was some sort of parade taking place. There were hot-air-balloons (sp?) in the air above us--scattering, and only a few of them. It was such a typical, vivid Vermont scene. There were rolling great hills surrounded by puffy white clouds that seemed to envelop the entire scene, crowding the sky, but also gathering around the tops of the hills. What slivers of sky could be seen were sharp blue. Everything was very sharp and crisp, come to think of it. We (I have no idea who "we" is--myself and a group of people living in the town, I guess.