Punisher: War Zone

**Bearsy** · 01-19-2009 07:09 AM

PUNISHER: WAR ZONE is THE BEST time I've had at the movies this awards season. I've seen better films. MUCH better films. SLUMDOG MILLIONAIRE, THE DARK KNIGHT, LET THE RIGHT ONE IN and RACHEL GETTING MARRIED I'm sure, someday, will influence my work and make me think twice before I let slide something hack-y and un-original.

But I didn't ever feel like standing up on my chair and cheering. None of them made me cackle like a rail-yard hobo who's found half a cigar and a can of beans. And none of them had a scene where Dominic West, in Frankenstein makeup, convinces black, Chinese and Irish gangs to put aside their differences and act as cannon-fodder in his hissy fit vengeance scheme against Frank Castle, aka The Punisher.

People are not shot in this film. They have holes blasted through them or are turned into sticky mist.

People are not punched in this film. They have their faces pummeled off.

Children are not threatened. They are un-fixably scarred for life.

The film does not contain a hero. It does not contain an anti-hero. It contains a glowering Brit who huffs around in a bullet-proof body canister like he's searching for the perfect toilet to unleash a ten burrito dump. He's just as awful as the villains he dispatches and, unlike scores of other action heroes, does not utter a single clever or ironic quip. He'll plug someone and already be turning away, scanning the horizon for something else to kill. He's played by Ray Stevenson, but could have easily been played by Ray Stevens. He's more a force of destruction than Jason Vorhees or Michael Meyers could ever dream on.

Keep in mind, all of this mayhem, insanity and just-plain bugfuckedness is contained in one of the most beautifully shot films I've seen this year. It's almost distracting, how gorgeous cinematographer Steve Gainer's palette is. It's like he studied BLACK NARCISSUS and THE RED SHOES right before shooting a snuff film.

And director Lexi Alexander, a former stunt woman and kick boxing champion, has just groin-punched her way to the front of the line in the Nutball Director's Pantheon. Make room, Miike! Step aside, Kounen!

PUNISHER: WAR ZONE is still in theaters. Barely. It took ten days for it to body-crawl past 7 million dollars.

**The Cusp** · 01-19-2009 06:52 PM

Originally Posted by Elis D.

People are not shot in this film. They have holes blasted through them or are turned into sticky mist.

People are not punched in this film. They have their faces pummeled off.

Children are not threatened. They are un-fixably scarred for life.

The film does not contain a hero. It does not contain an anti-hero. It contains a glowering Brit who huffs around in a bullet-proof body canister like he's searching for the perfect toilet to unleash a ten burrito dump. He's just as awful as the villains he dispatches and, unlike scores of other action heroes, does not utter a single clever or ironic quip. He'll plug someone and already be turning away, scanning the horizon for something else to kill. He's played by Ray Stevenson, but could have easily been played by Ray Stevens. He's more a force of destruction than Jason Vorhees or Michael Meyers could ever dream on.

Awesome, it sounds like they finally got the Punisher right this time. Well ok, she should be Italian instead of a Brit, but the attitude sounds right. It's got to be better than the '89 version with Dolph Lundgren.