Thread: Are Gays Capable Of Raising Children?

Howie's right when he says it all comes down to nature or nurture. And right now science doesn't have an answer as to which is right. And so the debate isn't much of a debate, more of an exploration of one's own beliefs.

But I will tell you this. give me 10 newborns, kill my conscience, and give me impunity from moral or legal reprimand, and I will give you 10 different abominations after 10 years. The role of nurture is significant enough that a child can be molded into anything within the human spectrum, and even some things well outside of what we consider human (look up: Hitler youth, feral children, etc). And still the cycle of life goes on, children always being born and almost always turning out OK, despite conditions of neglect, misuse, or poverty, which I say in subjectivity must all be far worse than having two parents of the same sex. You see, the creation of abominations has never been in the interest of human beings, save perhaps hitler or his ilk. If you put a child in the care of some person, any person with even a shred of morality, that person will almost invariably look after the child's interests. There's a reason you don't find dead children in the streets or hear of child brainwashing programs anymore. It's because of love. The only thing a child needs to develop healthily is love. And so if two gay people love each other and love a child enough to accept the tremendous burden of raising him, then that child will turn out alright.

TANGENT: something like 4 of 5 homosexuals were molested as children. If you view homosexuality as unnatural and want to protect a child from it, two things would seem to work very well: 1. [insert witty quip about the catholic church) or 2. put them in the care of any honest gay person. could any human being really repeat a traumatic experience of their childhood to another child? I personally submit no, but feel free to share if you've been molested and would molest someone else. anyone? didn't think so. If my understanding of morality and childhood trauma is at all correct, then it would seem that gay parenthood would produce fewer gays than straight parenthood(read: wherein abuse is more frequently unnoticed to the outside world due to the lack of prying eyes and the comfort of majority)

Originally Posted by Dangeruss

Howie's right when he says it all comes down to nature or nurture. And right now science doesn't have an answer as to which is right. And so the debate isn't much of a debate, more of an exploration of one's own beliefs.[/b]

amen

which makes it all the more sucky when a law is placed based on a certain group's beliefs, rather than on scientific evidence one way or the other

This topic seems silly to me without the real opinions of gay parents...or children raised by gay couples. You are all going on about what a gay couple WOULD or WOULDN'T do...and how children raised by a gay or straight couple WOULD or WOULDN'T feel or act...etc. I mean, it's all just assumptions...based on your own opinions. None of you really KNOW or have EVIDENCE of the claims that you are making. Meh...

Originally Posted by Aquanina

This topic seems silly to me without the real opinions of gay parents...or children raised by gay couples. You are all going on about what a gay couple WOULD or WOULDN'T do...and how children raised by a gay or straight couple WOULD or WOULDN'T feel or act...etc. I mean, it's all just assumptions...based on your own opinions. None of you really KNOW or have EVIDENCE of the claims that you are making. Meh...
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it all really IS just speculation

the best I got is that my stepdad, who's a psychiatrist, said that, based on studies he's read, children of gay couples don't become gay any more or less often than those of straight couples, nor do they end up any more screwed up

we'll just have to wait and see down the road when there are more examples of children raised by gay parents and, like nina said, we get their input on it before making and huge claims either way (though I'm inclined to believe that there's nothing so wrong about it that it should be against the law)

Originally Posted by Howetzer

Some great arguments for both sides. As I said before I think it ultimately comes down to a persons belief in nurture or nature.
Unless there is irrefutable evidence towards one or the other, then there will always be this debate.

I can state that science has come to realize that children mimic what they see at much earlier ages that ever realized. Also at a staggering rate that they take in information and are ..? programmed, at an early age as well. Take that as you will.
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I agree with that. The beleif in nature or nurture. I think they are both needed. You could look at it like Nature is the common sense one learns by him/herself. And Nurture are the lessons taught in either school or home. The idea in the world is balance. You need all things at the right amount to thrive. I think thats why the lord above (im sorry if you see it as pushing religious beleifs on you by just mentioning god, but thats the only way i can say 'god'... so deal with it.) made our bodies to need such balance in vitamins and minerals. The fact that some vitamins and minerals ingested at the same time as others will negate both. Some will completly absorb a vitamin. Take B6 and calcium for instance. Calcium will totally absorb B6 so that the body cannot reap the rewards of the vitamin. Our bodies are so much more complex than anyone of use gives credit for... this is the same with life. All that is required is balance. Male interaction. Female interaction. If both are made at an early age, then gay or straight doesnt matter.


Also its a good thing that someone mentioned single households. I was raised in a single household for a good part of my life. If it wasnt just my dad, then i was over at my grandparents which were strict as hell, and my grandpa hated kids. I found myself nerveous to be around women in middle school, i found that i was also sensitive because my grandmother was a dramaqueen. I also found out even recently that I didnt know how a man and a woman carried out a good relationship without strangling one another as far as clingy-ness goes.

Originally Posted by The_Musician

Also its a good thing that someone mentioned single households. I was raised in a single household for a good part of my life. If it wasnt just my dad, then i was over at my grandparents which were strict as hell, and my grandpa hated kids. I found myself nerveous to be around women in middle school, i found that i was also sensitive because my grandmother was a dramaqueen. I also found out even recently that I didnt know how a man and a woman carried out a good relationship without strangling one another as far as clingy-ness goes.
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So you should also find the relevance in two same sex couples having influence on a child.

I agree with that. The beleif in nature or nurture. I think they are both needed. You could look at it like Nature is the common sense one learns by him/herself. And Nurture are the lessons taught in either school or home. The idea in the world is balance. You need all things at the right amount to thrive. I think thats why the lord above (im sorry if you see it as pushing religious beleifs on you by just mentioning god, but thats the only way i can say 'god'... so deal with it.) made our bodies to need such balance in vitamins and minerals. The fact that some vitamins and minerals ingested at the same time as others will negate both. Some will completly absorb a vitamin. Take B6 and calcium for instance. Calcium will totally absorb B6 so that the body cannot reap the rewards of the vitamin. Our bodies are so much more complex than anyone of use gives credit for... this is the same with life. All that is required is balance. Male interaction. Female interaction. If both are made at an early age, then gay or straight doesnt matter.[/b]

So these complexities at times lead to inefficiency. Not correct. Not as it was suppose to have been born. So being gay should be viewed no different than that.
Please reread my other statements that go into greater detail on this facet of that part of the discussion.

Can gay men raise a Child?

Let me turn it around:
Why wouldn't Gay men be able to raise a Child? That's a good question. I don't see why not.

You see, you don't need to be female to be a good Parent.
My father has always been a very distant, busy man...Not much of a Father-person. A lousy parent.
However my cousin has a great dad, my Uncle. He is full of love, makes everyone laugh and always takes his daughter out on excursions and holidays, told me and her bedtime stories... He's a great parent.

I think if he were gay, my aunt were a man and good parent like my uncle too and my Cousin were adopted that she would have had at least JUST as much of a great childhood as she had now.

I don't see a problem with 2 gay men raising a child.
Some men, like my father were just not cut out to parent, while others are, like My Uncle.
So Provided that the 2 gay parents were good parents like my Uncle: I see absolutely no Problem in 2 gay men, being good parents, raising a child.

ok