I agree with you completely, Universal Mind. what the fuck is up with that. seriously, what the HEYLL.
so, anyways, about how cool ecstasy is. (haha)
no really it doesn't matter that it's cool, it's illegal, and lots of cool things are illegal, like gay marriage. my point here is, and before I say anything else, is that it is an illegal drug and no matter how "cool" I or anyone else thinks it is, it's illegal and by saying it's cool I DO NOT mean I recommend going out and trying it. on the contrary I recommend that you don't.
okay, now that that's clear.
I can't watch the documentary, or I can but I don't currently have speakers so I couldn't hear it. I think ecstasy has potential to be a good drug, but there are conditions. (one is that it's illegal, of course). another is that because it's illegal, it is sold illegitimately and has a higher chance of being laced with something very toxic (I think?), or "watered down" considerably, or not even ecstasy (MDMA) at all but something like caffiene or ephedrine or some other combination of non-MDMA stuff.
I think I should be able to relate my experience with it, it is in the past, and just telling people about it doesn't mean I recommend it. I can tell people about a time when I got drunk and drove my car into a ditch, but no one would recommend that would they? (I never did that by the way, it was just for example's sake.) I will actually say right now, before I talk about this experience, that I don't recommend anyone taking it, seriously. (unless it were to become legal, therefore safer).
I took it once, and although I would describe this as a positive experience, I STILL DO NOT RECOMMEND TRYING IT. I took one whole pill, and it hit me about 30 minutes later. I mean it HIT me. I was leaning back in a chair, and I sat up (I guess too fast), and suddenly felt like I was going to pass out. this really scared me, because of a traumatic experience I had involving marijuanna, in which I had a serious panic attack after taking about 4 hits and really believed I was going to die. (it was not because of the marijuanna itself, but because I had worked 87 hours that week, on little sleep, little food, lots of coffee. not a good time to take 4 hits of weed. also I do not advise the use of marijuanna either.) anyway, it had been quite awhile since the attack and over time I gradually got better at keeping myself calm if I suspected I was about to have another attack. after a few minutes, when I fully calmed myself, I felt...very open. it felt, in a way, like everything, absolutely everything, was a warm cozy blanket. everything was a wonderous work of art, every sense I focused on was a thousand times clearer. I felt "open" because I could absorb everything with every one of my senses so much better. it also felt like time slowed down. everything seemed a little slower. the first thing I noticed was my own voice, I talked to the two people I was with and I was hyper-aware of my voice. I spoke a lot slower.
my sense of touch was incredible, we were all massaging each others hands and feet, which felt absolutely amazing. (and we were all tripping.) in the duration of this whole experience nothing sexual happened, this was a completely non-sexual experience for all of us, but I can totally understand why people take e and fuck, HA. anyway, something I noticed was that my rubbing one of their hands or feet felt just as good as getting a massage myself. usually when you're the one giving the massage, you feel like you're doing work, and the only pleasure in it is knowing that the person you're massaging is getting pleasure from it. NOT THIS TIME. I rubbed their hands and feet for HOURS, and it felt just as good as (if not better than!) getting a massage myself. imagine that.
and I talked. A LOT. I talked the entire fucking time. I talked for 6 or 7 hours straight. up until just around the time I took the x, I had never been one to talk. I had just started opening up and talking to people more. I think x makes people more talkative anyway, but since I never talked before that, I think it made me talk double because I was letting it all out. I talked about everything, but the thing I kept wanting to talk about most was my childhood. before, I never felt good about my childhood. I didn't like remembering it. for some reason, it all seemed disgusting to me, I wished it had been totally different. it wasn't bad or anything, it just didn't appeal to me for some reason. but now, it was so beautiful. I could remember so many things, I remember a lot from my childhood anyway, but now each memory was much clearer. and as I talked, if someone brought something else up and we went off topic, I could always come right back to what I was talking about. my memory was hyperactive.
I have Grapheme → color synesthesia, the most common form of it, I see a different colour for every letter of the alphabet and every number (except for the letter "O" and the number 0, understandably). I don't SEE the colour, I am just sort of aware of it. so these letters I'm typing now are black, I see them as black, but I'm aware each has it's own colour, and so they sort of "appear" colourful. anyway, while I was tripping, it was a lot clearer, which was very cool.
after the 6 or 7 hours, when it mostly wore off, I felt terribly restless. I could NOT sleep. I kept thinking, and I kept rubbing- my own hands mostly. I couldn't stop for a long time. I was still rubbing my hands and other things nervously, off and on, for several days. also a few times in the days that followed I had these nervous attacks, I felt way too open, like I was absorbing every little thing I saw and could not tune anything out.
while I regard this as a positive experience (despite the restless days that followed), as it did help me to be more open to people and things, and the sensations involved were intense and wonderful, I do not recommend anyone trying it themselves. it is not safe. it is not legal. it could be laced with something, you never know. just don't do it.
I hope that sharing my experience was at least somewhat enlightening as to the effects of ecstasy, even though it was just one experience. if anyone has any questions, please ask, I'd be happy to answer. and God, I hope this does not get deleted, especially since I've clearly spelled out many times that I don't recommend the use of ecstasy or any illegal drug.
hey look at this, I found a huge list of slang terms for it and combinations of it with other drugs: http://www.mdma.net/ecstasy-mdma.html
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