The negative effects of increasing dream recall and clarity...

**Legato** · 10-19-2010 07:52 AM

I'm sure lots of people have posted sad stories of their former lovers.. or maybe it's just the thread below mine.

I just think it's worth explaining in a nutshell.

A brief description of myself beforehand. I'm 18 years old. Going in to the Navy. Trying to attain my first lucid dream. Boot camp is in June.

In June, a few months ago I broke up with a girl who I've been with for a little over 4 years. I went from waking up with her right besides me in the morning and spending every waking moment with each other... to having her move in to another guys apartment and changing her phone number to avoid me.

Now I'll spare all the sad details but I think it's fascinating how dreams and the subconscious work together. Even though I'm mostly over the pain of the breakup.
In almost every dream I recall, she is there.

It's as if my subconscious thinks she's still with me. In my dreams we're still together and sometimes I even go back in time to when I'm with her. Increasing my dream recall is getting very difficult because I just see her clearer every night. And for those of you who know how vivid a dream can be.. these experiences are so real it's scary. You can even feel your fingers stroking their hair.

Anyways, I just thought I would share that little bit. I guess it's an inspiration to keep trying for my first LD so that I can control it and get rid of those thoughts. It's almost like Inception, just she ain't dead.

Anyways, goodnight and happy dreaming.

**sunshineDaydream** · 10-19-2010 09:53 AM

Isn't it interesting how vivid it can be? Just a couple of nights ago I dreamt of an ex lover and remember being able to feel every muscle on his back.

I'm assuming because you say 'negative effects' you don't want to continue having these dreams about her? Maybe when you get lucid you can tell her she's not allowed in your dreams anymore. That has worked for me before. Until then, you can use her as a dream cue. Put it in your head that if you are with her, you are probably dreaming. She might actually be able to help you become lucid.

P.S. Really wish you hadn't said that about Inception without a spoiler alert. As I just got done looking up showtimes. *shakes fist* ah well, my own fault for being so lame and being the only person in existence who hasn't seen it yet.

**Legato** · 10-19-2010 08:49 PM

I didn't really spoil anything. The movie is so massive and complex that seeing it is a completely different thing.

And well yeah, the dreams are amazing and they bring back old feelings. Some of the best feelings ever. But then I wake up to this world and I just feel so disappointed. I ain't depressed anymore but it definitely doesn't help me get over her.

And actually, she almost helped me attain lucidity. The other day I realized that it was impossible for her to be there with me in my dream, but right when I figured out it was a dream I woke up. It was in the middle of sleep paralysis so nothing was very stable.

**Robot_Butler** · 10-19-2010 10:55 PM

Dreams like these are great reminders to cherish the time you have with others in your waking life. You can experience many amazing things in dreams, but, sadly, you can not interact with other people. You can never duplicate a real loving relationship in a dream. When I get a sad dream about someone I've lost, I let it inspire me to go meet new people and strengthen the relationships I still do have.