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    Thread: I can't just take it easy. Any advice?

    1. #1
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      I can't just take it easy. Any advice?

      Hello dreamers!

      I've been practicing lucid dreaming nowadays, and this week I found out the best way (particular way) to attain lucidity.
      I'm waking up really early (6 AM) during the week to go to a class. This class finishes before lunch, but it restart again at 2 PM. So before lunch, I take naps in my car, and believe it or not, I got to my lucid dream ALL days I took a nap. Yeah, I know it's great, but the hard thing is coming later.
      Everytime I get to a Lucid Dream, I always control myself good at the beginning of the dream. I don't get too excited, I do some reality checks until the dream gets clear and colorful. But after that, I ALWAYS do the 2 SAME things:
      I jump to start flying (which I can do pretty well) and then I go search for some girls to do 'stuff' with them (I ain't no perverted), and ALWAYS after that I get too excited and then I wake up. I can start a good lucid dream, but I don't know why, my unconscious mind always brings me to search for girls - I love them, by the way, but not like a maniac.

      I need some tips/help about what I can do to control more my actions in my dream, like do more creative stuff, etc.
      Am looking forward for your tips!

      Thank you!
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    2. #2
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      Same thing happens to me man! when i am lucky enough to get a lucid dream i really want to explore my dream world and really test my limits and have adventures but by subconscious makes me look for some nice looking girls too! I guess one way we can both overcome this is to do some MILD type mantras like "When i lucid dream, i dont have sex" and maybe this will help

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      I hope I do not get this urge when I finally become lucid! I am happily married so I'm hoping this has some effect on my subconscious desires when I finally get there.

      I have been visualising what I'd like from my lucid dreams when I do reality checks to in a way invoke the dream I desire if I happen to be dreaming At the point of reality checking.

      As well as repeating mantras during hypnagogic state to myself on what I'd like from my lucid dreams namely question my dream characters as to what they represent, to find my dream guide and the ultimate goal is to find what I envision to be a vault where my memories are stored.
      Last edited by Desryachri; 02-08-2014 at 09:25 AM.
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    4. #4
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      Sex always wakes me up too or makes me loose my LD. But I rarely do it, almost never. You have to remind yourself all the time, that you NEED to stay focused, calm.... Do it when you are awake, do it when you go to sleep. Practise when you are awake... Just pretend you are in a LD and do as you are trying to calm yourself down. Even when you are in a dream and it feels you have it under control and its calm, you still need to remind yourself that you need to stay focus. I become lucid, than I stop every minute or two what I am doing, and just look at my hands, touch walls, grab things, reminding myself I need to stay focused. And it works...

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      Quote Originally Posted by RichardPena98 View Post
      Same thing happens to me man! when i am lucky enough to get a lucid dream i really want to explore my dream world and really test my limits and have adventures but by subconscious makes me look for some nice looking girls too! I guess one way we can both overcome this is to do some MILD type mantras like "When i lucid dream, i dont have sex" and maybe this will help
      Yeah, I'll try the mantras! They work really well when my lucid dream start, so I think "I'm dreaming, be cool." and then I go flying search for girls. But next time I'll try to control myself! hehe thanks man
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      Quote Originally Posted by nitika View Post
      Sex always wakes me up too or makes me loose my LD. But I rarely do it, almost never. You have to remind yourself all the time, that you NEED to stay focused, calm.... Do it when you are awake, do it when you go to sleep. Practise when you are awake... Just pretend you are in a LD and do as you are trying to calm yourself down. Even when you are in a dream and it feels you have it under control and its calm, you still need to remind yourself that you need to stay focus. I become lucid, than I stop every minute or two what I am doing, and just look at my hands, touch walls, grab things, reminding myself I need to stay focused. And it works...
      Got it. The secret is the FOCUS. We can't just do things that makes us really excited? That's hard because everything you do in a dream makes you really excited, like flying, creating fireballs, etc. How do we get excited without waking up? Thanks anyway, nitika

    7. #7
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      Think about what you want to do instead of what you don't want to do. Be specific. Rehearse it in daydreams. The key is to remember what you want to do after you become lucid. You can even include flying as part of it, but with purpose. Like fly to the moon and explore the surface.

      If you want a more open-ended experience where you react to the dream scene, you can still work in some specific things to remember. Start a conversation with a DC by asking their name and favorite flavor of ice cream. Or touch the ground and walls in the scene to stimulate the tactile sense. Things like that. Have specific cues and goals to accomplish within a larger improvisation.
      I am sure about illusion. I am not so sure about reality.

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      Quote Originally Posted by sisyphus View Post
      Think about what you want to do instead of what you don't want to do. Be specific. Rehearse it in daydreams. The key is to remember what you want to do after you become lucid. You can even include flying as part of it, but with purpose. Like fly to the moon and explore the surface.

      If you want a more open-ended experience where you react to the dream scene, you can still work in some specific things to remember. Start a conversation with a DC by asking their name and favorite flavor of ice cream. Or touch the ground and walls in the scene to stimulate the tactile sense. Things like that. Have specific cues and goals to accomplish within a larger improvisation.
      Interesting.
      Well, so doing simple things (touching the ground, walls, etc.) are good to maintain the lucid dream state?
      So whatever I do that makes me excited in the dream will wake me up?
      I always rub my hands when I know that I'm dreaming and everything starts to get more colourful, but afterwards I always do the 2 things I mentioned above.
      So, I should practice what I'm gonna do in the dream before attaining lucidity?
      Thank you, sisyphus

    9. #9
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      MaerDream, I think your problem might lie more in memory than anything else. When you become lucid and only do the same two things, you are likely doing this because you are not remembering to do anything else (or even that there is anything else to do).

      Your memory is naturally unavailable during regular dreams, so it can be difficult to access during LD's -- and, without memory, you "forget" to do the things you wanted to do, or can't avoid doing some simple recurring action that your unconscious sends up in response to your lucidity.

      What you might need to do is "turn up" that lucidity a bit, to help activate access to your memory. I suggest that you set very specific goals for your dreams (goals that, of course do NOT include flying or searching for those girls). Think about those goals often during the days before your LD attempts: about how everything will look, about how you'll feel, about what you'll do. Then include those goals in your thoughts (or your mantra) as you go to sleep before the expected LD along with a firm intention to remember them.

      Another thing you could do is set an intention as you go to sleep that you will remember that your real body is asleep back in its bed ... this is a nice step toward remembering everything else.

      This might sound like odd advice, but you might consider it. Memory is a critical but often overlooked fundamental of lucid dreaming. Give it some attention, and you might solve your problem.

      A side-effect of this remembering, BTW, is that it allows you to pause and gather more self-awareness, in effect elevating your lucidity; so, if you are able to activate your memory, you will not only solve your problem but also be more lucid, and ready for even better adventures!
      Last edited by Sageous; 02-08-2014 at 06:14 PM.

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      Quote Originally Posted by Sageous View Post
      MaerDream, I think your problem might lie more in memory than anything else. When you become lucid and only do the same two things, you are likely doing this because you are not remembering to do anything else (or even that there is anything else to do).

      Your memory is naturally unavailable during regular dreams, so it can be difficult to access during LD's -- and, without memory, you "forget" to do the things you wanted to do, or can't avoid doing some simple recurring action that your unconscious sends up in response to your lucidity.

      What you might need to do is "turn up" that lucidity a bit, to help activate access to your memory. I suggest that you set very specific goals for your dreams (goals that, of course do NOT include flying or searching for those girls). Think about those goals often during the days before your LD attempts: about how everything will look, about how you'll feel, about what you'll do. Then include those goals in your thoughts (or your mantra) as you go to sleep before the expected LD along with a firm intention to remember them.

      Another thing you could do is set an intention as you go to sleep that you will remember that your real body is asleep back in its bed ... this is a nice step toward remembering everything else.

      This might sound like odd advice, but you might consider it. Memory is a critical but often overlooked fundamental of lucid dreaming. Give it some attention, and you might solve your problem.

      A side-effect of this remembering, BTW, is that it allows you to pause and gather more self-awareness, in effect elevating your lucidity; so, if you are able to activate your memory, you will not only solve your problem but also be more lucid, and ready for even better adventures!
      Well, that was a perfect explanation.
      Yeah, I think my problem is in the memory thing. Before I take the naps, I always think on doing stuff to help with my work, which is music. But everytime I get to the lucidity, I forget about my work and I go do naughty things.
      I'll practice my memory and my mantras before taking those naps then.
      So, for example, if I want to make a piano appear, I have to practice my memory on doing such things before taking the naps?
      It's weird because when I get to sleep paralysis or lucid dreaming I always keep calm and do it great.
      But after I know I'm lucid, I do those things.
      Sorry about such silly questions.
      Thank you, Sageous.

    11. #11
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      Quote Originally Posted by maerDream View Post
      So, for example, if I want to make a piano appear, I have to practice my memory on doing such things before taking the naps?
      Yes. But also think about it during the day as well, to help build up an expectation both of the piano and remembering to play it.

      It's weird because when I get to sleep paralysis or lucid dreaming I always keep calm and do it great. But after I know I'm lucid, I do those things.
      That's more common than you might think... be glad, though, that you at least have the first step down!
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    12. #12
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      I've got the same problem and usually end up spending the rest of the dream searching for hot girls instead of doing what I planned to do. Some very helpful advice here that I plan to try out to sort the issue. Thanks all.
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