Why Do You Want to Lucid Dream?

[O'nus]

Hello, why do you want to lucid dream? Are you having difficulties lucid dreaming? Remembering your dreams? Are you having sleeping problems? Uncomfortable nights? Are you finding life dismal? Perhaps it is perfectly content? Before delving into learning how to lucid dream, it is best to ask yourself, "Why?". I have tried to teach many people how to lucid dream and, many times, this simple question leads to an entirely new resolution. I. Do you want to be able to be in control? II. Do you want to escape the stress of regular life? III. Do you want to control your erradic sleep? IV. Do you want fulfill fantasies? -------------------- I. Sleep In Order to Control? "The harder you press onto a wall, the more you try to force it, will only revert all the more stress on yourself." If you are seeking a feeling of control, I'd like you to ask why? Do you feel out of control in your waking life? Why? Why do you not talk back? Why do you subject yourself to others wills or, better yet, why do you not try and find ways to connect with others rather than distance yourself? The choice is ultimately yours. You do not have to let others influence you. You are always the one in control of your providence. Never forget that you can deliberately change your attitude at any time for any reason that you wish. No one can take this away from you. Is there a gun to your head? You have the choice to leave, to say no, to find help, to fight back, or to choose to enjoy it! No one, no matter what the case, can take away your ability to choose how you feel and who you are. Control your life, not your dreams. Do not delude yourself and give into a diversion of the real issue. If you are feeling alienated by society, find ways to integrate, not to isolate. You may say, "Well, I like to be isolated" but why would you? You do not like the trends that others do? I think that the very fact that you are reading this shows that there are, in fact, others in the world that do share your interests. Go find them! Communicate! II. Escape? "No matter how far you run, your shadow will always follow you." Problems, conflicts, emotions, and all things that are human will encompass your life wherever you go. Any job, school, social clique, parents, friend, and even dreams will offer challenges and problems. Embrace chaos. Without chaos and stress in life, there would really be no reason to think or find ways to enjoy life. You need stress and you need chaos in order to embrace the better things in life. The more stress you have, the more you will appreciate those short moments of exuberance. Keep in mind, however, that you do not need others in order to be happy. Dreams are not an escape. Unfortunately, you will wake up. You cannot run away from your responsibilities. There is no harm in taking this up either. Find ways that you can enjoy things and life rather than focusing on the negatives and what you dislike. "The longer you stare into the darkness, the more that darkness becomes you." You are the one who is choosing to stare into the darkness or not. III. Sleep problems. "You cannot chase two rabbits at the sametime. Focus at one issue at a time. While lucid dreaming may seem overwhelmingly amazing and inspiring, it will also make you feel alienated and like a candy that you cannot have. Be patient. One step at a time. Figure out what is causing you these problems before looking too far ahead. Keep your eyes fixed just ahead of you rather than on the horizon. Seek help for your insomnia problems or breathing issues; whichever it is, keep focus. You can get help and there are many who want to offer it. IV. Fulfill Fantasies While fulfilling fantasies can be harmless in the long run, it is important to keep control of your desires and remember that they are dreams. Fantasies are nothing compared to real life. Nothing you can dream of is more amazing than what is right infront of you. Think about it; you are trying to find a way to control your unconsciousness via some method in the tangible world. Could you ever dream of something so transcendent and intriguing? A simple view of fractals (or SolSkye's threads) will show you just how inspiring life can really be. If you are seeking to fulfill fantasies which are simply not capable in life, keep in mind that some are very well capable and it is this notion you have that they are not which deters your ability to make them come to fruition. Do not dream of what you can do; just do it! Dreaming of how to talk to a girl? How to kiss a guy? What to say to someone? What you would do if someone died or asked you to marriage? You have many people who are willing to help you and offer you their vast experiences in life. Dreams are completely isolated - you dream alone. Open yourself up to others instead of shelling yourself and a whole new world will reveal itself to you. ------------- Be careful. The rise of self-awareness across the horizon can sometimes be blinding. I hope this has been enlightening. ~

[LucidDreamGod]

I mostly Lucid Dream for II and ofcourse IV I find most of your agruments pretty valid, but I think you can run from responsibility in the time being and thats the important thing, therefore you have no reason to thnik about your responsibilitys in your dreams thats just a waste of time. And you think it's better to deal with the problems we have in real life, in real life, see I disagree with you there in certain problems ofcourse it might be better in terms of effectivness but the easiness of it in a dream is far better, and besides you can just use dreams as training wheels for fixing a problem and then later on you can do it in real life and it will be much easier, I mean obvously you wanted to mention the things dreams are missing as comapred to real life, but there are so much more that dreams have that life just can't. You do not have to let others influence you. You are always the one in control of your providence. Never forget that you can deliberately change your attitude at any time for any reason that you wish. Thats not as easy as it always sounds, specually when your just depressed, then when your confident you always get that feeling that makes you wonder why you couldn't just feel anything anytime, but it just isn't that way in the average days mood.

[O'nus]

I mostly Lucid Dream for II and ofcourse IV I find most of your agruments pretty valid, but I think you can run from responsibility in the time being and thats the important thing, therefore you have no reason to think about your responsibilitys in your dreams thats just a waste of time. Key emphasis on "time being". You can use the same justification for psychadelic drugs or alcohol. Perhaps even abuse - it makes you feel good for a temporary amount of time. However, you eventually must deal with the issue. Do you think that this is avoiding the problem...? And you think it's better to deal with the problems we have in real life, in real life, see I disagree with you there in certain problems ofcourse it might be better in terms of effectivness but the easiness of it in a dream is far better, and besides you can just use dreams as training wheels for fixing a problem and then later on you can do it in real life and it will be much easier, I mean obvously you wanted to mention the things dreams are missing as comapred to real life, but there are so much more that dreams have that life just can't. I do not think you give yourself enough credit. Let me demonstrate: - Be happpy - decide to happy right now. You have the free ability to do this anytime you want. You do not need a dream to do this or any other conditions. Anything else, any other fantasies or desires, are just contingents to this eternal happiness that you can have if you choose to have it. Obviously, the largest thing you can do in dreams which you cannot do in waking life is control the external. However, my question is; why do you want to do this? What do you think...? Edit: Thats not as easy as it always sounds, specually when your just depressed, then when your confident you always get that feeling that makes you wonder why you couldn't just feel anything anytime, but it just isn't that way in the average days mood. True; it requires a lot of strength and effort and I think that is why so many people are incapable of doing so. I can tell you that I resolved my depression through these means and I have been in an infinite exuberant state ever since. Nothing can take this away from me unless I want it to. You are capable of just the samething. It is the feeling of giving up on this seeming challenge that perpetuates the depression. It is because you know you can do those but do not that can perpetuate the depression. However, just like convincing yourself to sky-dive - once you land, it is more fulfilling than anything. ~

[LucidDreamGod]

Key emphasis on "time being". You can use the same justification for psychadelic drugs or alcohol. Perhaps even abuse - it makes you feel good for a temporary amount of time. However, you eventually must deal with the issue. Do you think that this is avoiding the problem...? I do not think you give yourself enough credit. Let me demonstrate: - Be happpy - decide to happy right now. You have the free ability to do this anytime you want. You do not need a dream to do this or any other conditions. Anything else, any other fantasies or desires, are just contingents to this eternal happiness that you can have if you choose to have it. Obviously, the largest thing you can do in dreams which you cannot do in waking life is control the external. However, my question is; why do you want to do this? What do you think...? Edit: True; it requires a lot of strength and effort and I think that is why so many people are incapable of doing so. I can tell you that I resolved my depression through these means and I have been in an infinite exuberant state ever since. Nothing can take this away from me unless I want it to. You are capable of just the samething. It is the feeling of giving up on this seeming challenge that perpetuates the depression. It is because you know you can do those but do not that can perpetuate the depression. However, just like convincing yourself to sky-dive - once you land, it is more fulfilling than anything. ~ Well I wouldn't justify drugs because after doing it you actually are harmed in certain ways, not imeadietly by physical problems but my addiction, physical dependency exspecualy, Yes I think it's avoiding the problem temperaroly and thats the key, but you ment long term, inless you stayed there forever which is impossible or died in your sleep no you couldn't avoid it, it's still a nice break though, your right there. If I decided to be happy it would really be fake happiness, sure I could say I have everything I need and I don't have any major problems, I have peole who care about me, and friends that I like to spend time with. It just feels like greatfulness well a part of me desires to get away and to get to my true desires. My true desires range from adventure to romance, and every where inbewteen, why? because it brings me satisfication, so I can enjoy real life later on, altermitly it ends up improving my real life, why can't I get those things now? I could but some of them would be betetr and more interesting experiences in dreams, and those thigns are a real challange to get in the waking world. EDIT: Yeah your right there certain goals in real life leave a very good after impression on yourself, certainly soemthing to look forward to if you choose not to use lucid dreams to assist you. Oh sorry that I make so many mistakes in my spelling, I tend to type fast with only 2 fingers. Ofcourse there is no correct answer as to reather it's better to just aim for your dreams in reality them go down the root of escapism, kind of like choosing to use training wheels then ride a bike or just ride a bike from the start, you might feel stronger and it might have an everlasting proudness thats stronger for the person who was bold enough to climb onto the bike first thing.

[O'nus]

Well I wouldn't justify drugs because after doing it you actually are harmed in certain ways, not imeadietly by physical problems but my addiction, physical dependency exspecualy, Yes I think it's avoiding the problem temperaroly and thats the key, but you ment long term, inless you stayed there forever which is impossible or died in your sleep no you couldn't avoid it, it's still a nice break though, your right there. What is the difference between escaping life via drugs and dreams? You can easily get addicted to dreams and the idea of lucid dreaming which can cause you to sleep more which will also cause many physical problems. Sleeping in excess causes significant health problems. So, what is the difference then? I think we agree, though, that it is still avoiding the real issue - if this is the reasoning behind lucid dreaming. If I decided to be happy it would really be fake happiness, sure I could say I have everything I need and I don't have any major problems, I have peole who care about me, and friends that I like to spend time with. It just feels like greatfulness well a part of me desires to get away and to get to my true desires. What's stopping you from acquiring these desires in real life? Do you feel you need to fulfill these desires in order to be happy? My true desires range from adventure to romance, and every where inbewteen, why? because it brings me satisfication, so I can enjoy real life later on, altermitly it ends up improving my real life, why can't I get those things now? I could but some of them would be betetr and more interesting experiences in dreams, and those thigns are a real challange to get in the waking world. Which things? What would feel more joyous: - In waking life; That person you have a crush on finally talking to you and asking you out - In a lucid dream; having a lovely night out, sex, or anything else in a lucid dream while under the pretense that it is not "real" Ofcourse there is no correct answer as to reather it's better to just aim for your dreams in reality them go down the root of escapism, kind of like choosing to use training wheels then ride a bike or just ride a bike from the start, you might feel stronger and it might have an everlasting proudness thats stronger for the person who was bold enough to climb onto the bike first thing. Sometimes preperation can cause even more anxiety. Who do you think will be more nervous: - A: Studied for an exam for a full year, or some great length of time - B: Studied for a very short period of time, if at all. - Let us say they both pass with 95% - A: Will feel relief and joy from all the time they have invested - B: Will feel joyous and surprise from doing so well with little practice at all! My point in this analogy is that, while exams are a near impossible thing to practice this liberty with, happiness is easily accesible at any time. What do you think...? ~

[LucidDreamGod]

What is the difference between escaping life via drugs and dreams? You can easily get addicted to dreams and the idea of lucid dreaming which can cause you to sleep more which will also cause many physical problems. Sleeping in excess causes significant health problems. So, what is the difference then? I think we agree, though, that it is still avoiding the real issue - if this is the reasoning behind lucid dreaming. What's stopping you from acquiring these desires in real life? Do you feel you need to fulfill these desires in order to be happy? Which things? What would feel more joyous: - In waking life; That person you have a crush on finally talking to you and asking you out - In a lucid dream; having a lovely night out, sex, or anything else in a lucid dream while under the pretense that it is not "real" Sometimes preperation can cause even more anxiety. Who do you think will be more nervous: - A: Studied for an exam for a full year, or some great length of time - B: Studied for a very short period of time, if at all. - Let us say they both pass with 95% - A: Will feel relief and joy from all the time they have invested - B: Will feel joyous and surprise from doing so well with little practice at all! My point in this analogy is that, while exams are a near impossible thing to practice this liberty with, happiness is easily accesible at any time. What do you think...? ~ Yeah you could get addicted to lucid dreaming and it could have physical problems, though it's probably more controllable and less unhealthy to be addicted to your own dreams, and easy to stop then drugs, though it's worth alittle addiction when it comes to the dullness in my life, though I wouldn't sleep over 10-12 hours usualy. A Berrier is stopping me from gaining most of the desires in my life, I tell myself to do it, but I just can't seem to do some things, like build relationships because I fear rejection so much and more then that my natural side just seems to not let me do it, a part of me even makes excuses like I really don't need it, or even that I can do it in a lucid dream. I feel that after I've had it that life would be much funner to live, and I am into the habbit of thinking that I must have the better way, so my mind actually makes it worse then it would be following the path that I am, then normaly would be if I didn't worry so much. Hmmm the first option never seems to happen, I've waited for 4 years almost and nothing, because I am sooo shy I can't seem to make my move, and she's alittle shy to even when I smile at her and she smiles back she won't initiate anything. Option two has it's advantages, you don't have to be limited by resterants and school in a dream you can go to magical kingdomes and go on adventures together. Well yes sometimes making something bigger then it really is, is going to blow up the problem you originaly are trying to make smaller, I think the realism that lucid dreams can have, and the fact that I always seem to be thinking about a problem I'm going to face will overcome the nervousness developed in preperation. I can't be certain but it's a guess with me as an indivisual that it'd be easier that way, still I'm not sure. Some of this deep conversation has made me relise bad thinking habbits I have, interesting, but I don't know if they can be overcome.

[O'nus]

though it's probably more controllable and less unhealthy to be addicted to your own dreams, and easy to stop then drugs I would not be so sure to say that. There is certainly a dynamic of addiction. Some people can easily rectify their addiction whereas others are enthralled. I would say the same about dreaming. Just take a look at insomniacs. Many insomniacs deliberately keep themselves asleep; why do you think they would do that? Hmmm the first option never seems to happen, I've waited for 4 years almost and nothing, because I am sooo shy I can't seem to make my move, and she's alittle shy to even when I smile at her and she smiles back she won't initiate anything. Option two has it's advantages, you don't have to be limited by resterants and school in a dream you can go to magical kingdomes and go on adventures together. There is nothing stopping you but yourself from talking to her. Worst case scenario, she says "no" and that only reveals that you were not meant to be with her then. If it is still so enthralling, then perhaps you are more in love with the idea of being in love rather than the person. Some of this deep conversation has made me relise bad thinking habbits I have, interesting, but I don't know if they can be overcome. I hope it helps. You are the one in control of your life and your individual providence. In conjunction with this, might I suggest you click "What is the onus...?" in my signature and let me know what you think about it. ~

[bluefinger]

For me, it is a question of curiosity. I find the concept of lucid dreaming quite interesting, and thus I wish to explore it. I wouldn't say it's escapism for me, I get enough of that through my computer games (joke!), but of course, I do want to do all sorts of things with my dreams. So, overall... it's mostly curiosity

[O'nus]

For me, it is a question of curiosity. I find the concept of lucid dreaming quite interesting, and thus I wish to explore it. I wouldn't say it's escapism for me, I get enough of that through my computer games (joke!), but of course, I do want to do all sorts of things with my dreams. So, overall... it's mostly curiosity Seems like a good reason for me; it keeps your individuality in check and does not rely on anything else for a sense of purpose or fulfillment. ~

[bluefinger]

Seems like a good reason for me; it keeps your individuality in check and does not rely on anything else for a sense of purpose or fulfillment. ~ My purpose in a way is to find out more about myself through my dreams. In terms of what I have done with the lucid dreams I have had, I've always focused on either 1) exploring the peculiarities of the dream world, or 2) Looking for my subconscious, etc. A high goal set quite early, but I feel it helps me motivate towards me getting better at LDing. However, at the moment, I'm in a 3-4 month long dry spell, so for the moment, I'm simply trying new techniques and getting back into the habit of doing loads of RCs during waking life.

[CrimsonWolf]

That is a great post O'nus, a lot of very useful stuff there. Personlly, I lucid Dream to fufill fantasies, although mine are ones that can't be completed in real life; such as adventures to other worlds or using magic and the like.

[roguext22]

very good thread onus.. i dont want to ld for years..but still it happens... its quite useless for me to ld... but.. answer your question onus.. are you also dont want to ld?

[O'nus]

That is a great post O'nus, a lot of very useful stuff there. Personlly, I lucid Dream to fufill fantasies, although mine are ones that can't be completed in real life; such as adventures to other worlds or using magic and the like. What I am curious of is why you want to experience travelling to other words or using magic? There are many places, likely in just the city you live in, that you have never been. As for magic, why? How does it make you feel? Why do you desire that? are you also dont want to ld? Rogue, I like you. I get the impression that English if your first language (or have difficulty typing) and you still talk to us - I like your spirit. I do like to lucid dream, but I usually give it up to dream a normal dream. I sometimes like normal dreams more because they tell me about myself and let me interpret myself. Lucid dreams are fun and I look at them the same way I look at any other form of entertainment. As for others, I am simply trying to drive an inquiry into the difference between entertainment and desire. Sometimes we may even delude ourselves - perhaps I am deluding myself. This constant inquiry is infinitly revealing. ~

[Metaphyz1k]

You do not have to let others influence you. You are always the one in control of your providence. Never forget that you can deliberately change your attitude at any time for any reason that you wish. This would be wonderful, if it were true. However, we live in a society in which we are constantly influenced by those around us. Those with more knowledge, intelligence, and experience than ourselves are held in high regard, and we are are expected to seek their wisdom and, hopefully, rise to their level of expertise. We see this in throughout workplace, educational environments, and casual social settings every single day of our lives. One of the primary aspects of society is influence, and this is how a community grows. You may say, "Well, I like to be isolated" but why would you? If you are feeling alienated by society, find ways to integrate, not to isolate ...you do not need others in order to be happy. You were making quite a point there about isolation, but then you contradict yourself in the very next subject. How can you suggest that one shouldn't isolate oneself from society (even if they like it, mind you), but then explain that happiness can be found there? I fail to understand your reasoning. But, personally, I believe that if isolation brings true happiness, one shouldn't hesitate to seek it. This separation from society may or may not better it, but what good is one to the community if he or she is unhappy? Dreams are not an escape. They indeed shouldn't be. One of the main premises of lucid dreaming is to better one's waking life by means of new knowledge and insight attained through exploring his or her inner self. Fantasies are nothing compared to real life. Are they not? Without fantasies, how would one's aspirations in life shape into being? If one doesn't dream about it, they cannot achieve it, as with any prestigious goal that requires hard work and dedication. If you are seeking to fulfill fantasies which are simply not capable in life, keep in mind that some are very well capable and it is this notion you have that they are not which deters your ability to make them come to fruition. Hmm, now fantasies seem have a lick of significance. All of the sudden, they are no longer nothing compared to the real world, but now they are capable of directly translating into it, thus imposing a considerable influence upon it! Do not dream of what you can do; just do it! Dreaming of how to talk to a girl? How to kiss a guy? What to say to someone? What you would do if someone died or asked you to marriage? You have many people who are willing to help you and offer you their vast experiences in life. But why not try looking inward for some advice as to how to go about living one's life? Lucid dreams are excellent tools for rehearsing for waking life, so why shouldn't they be they be utilized to their fullest potential? I am not saying that you should cease to ask for advice outwardly, but looking inwardly is sure to provide some useful insight, as well as prepare one for how to apply it to the real world. Dreams are completely isolated - you dream alone. But not fruitlessly.