Sorry about the double post, and that this one is so long, but I had a breakthrough of sorts. I left the RV and went into my office in the trailer where I've been going to study for the last few days.
I did 2 runic readings with the only question that could come to mind: "What do I need to Learn?"
I used the stones first and drew 9 then cast them on the cloth. With that reading, you look for patterns. The center runes are most important and the ones to the outside represent outside influences.
The first rune in the pattern was Dagaz. It was the only one that fell completely straight. All the others were either Merkstave (crooked) or Reversed. It wasn't a pleasant reading and I was confused as to how I should interpret it.
So I decided on something more simple. I drew 3 wooden runes and laid them before me, representing Past, Present, Future. The three runes had also been randomly drawn for the stones. And these too were either merkstave or reversed *sigh*
I decided to read them as upright because of the nature of the question. And then it made sense.
They spoke of creating my own path, of spiritual growth and journeys.
I then set about randomly choosing a rune for study. I chose "Algiz", then crocheted a sachet to wear both the wooden rune and symbolic stone around my neck.
But I kept thinking about Dagaz.
I gave myself a spiritual name then decided to tattoo Dagaz on the inside of my right wrist.
I felt instantly liberated and driven to make the changes in my life that must be made.
This is what I knew of the meaning of the rune:
"Breakthrough, awakening, awareness. Daylight clarity as opposed to nighttime uncertainty. A time to plan or embark upon an enterprise. The power of change directed by your own will, transformation. Hope/happiness, the ideal. Security and certainty. Growth and release. Balance point, the place where opposites meet. Dagaz Merkstave (Dagaz cannot be reversed, but may lie in opposition): A completion, ending, limit, coming full circle. Blindness, hopelessness."
But then I came back to the RV and decided to research the rune some more. I found a beautifully written page and as I read it, I knew for a certainty that I had chosen correctly. If harmonizes with what I'm going through completely.
"Dagaz is also the confusion inevitable in the spiritual journey. It embodies those times the Gods and ancestors throw us into turmoil, where we cannot see where we are going or where we are or how we go there or what on earth is happening but all omens and portents, our own discernment, it all points we are where we need to be and going in the right direction. Dagaz can be called upon in those times to help wind one’s way to some small degree of understanding of the overall path out of the chaos. Chaos is part of dagaz’s nature though. it understands it and understands how it can be incredibly productive."
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