July 22nd, 2010 – 0403
I dreamt, earlier, about flying. Oompah was somehow narrating it, instructing me. I chose from a few planes. There was the B-2 Spirit (with propellers on the front) and a few others, including a VTOL. I think it was a logic problem, which to choose, as they were all boxed in by other planes. I chose the Spirit anyways. It got some lift in the short space it had, and cleared the other planes, but as I accelerated, instead of going up, it went down. It bounced up again, and I pointed it towards the sky and gunned it. It cleared. I fly around for a bit, generally straight up and straight down. I fly close to the land, over mountains and stuff. This whole time my view of the plan has been in the third person, but now I am somehow physically attached to the plan, holding on as I steer it. But I fall off, once into one cliff area, and later into another. A cinematic screen comes up and displays the names of these two deadly gorges, and I can’t help but feel they are somehow related to Lord of the Rings. Later . . . my brother and I are with my dad. We are going to my grandfather’s house to visit. In the car, my brother and I have some Ritz-Bitz, although they’re more like desert-y peanut butter crackers. In the car, I realize my iPod Nano can actually play music without any headphones in it. We go into my grandfather’s house, although I don’t see my grandfather or grandmother. I do see [great-grandfather] though, who is happy to see me. We hug, and I say, “It’s good to see you Papa!” For some reason, I cannot see anybody, but they are all telling [great-grandfather] to get back to his chair. Suddenly, I know that we are staying the night for some reason. I go to the kitchen, which is the kitchen from Mom’s house. Dad is in there, putting food into the fridge. I complain about starving. He asks me if I ate my Ritz Bitz, and I confirm that I did. I tell him, “I’m just so hungry.” He tells me I can have some more if I’d like. I remember going off somewhere, and coming back for more. Everyone goes to bed except Sean and me. The dream gets hazy here. For a minute, I am doing something in the presence of this pained hacking. It may have been a new dream. Anyways, I’m in my pajamas and in the kitchen, and it’s daytime, although I do not yet notice it. I walk towards the sound of the hacking, and find [my dog] is the source of the noise. He is in the game room, almost into the kitchen, but he falls painfully into the wall. I pet him and tell him he will be alright. Suddenly, I realize this is pretty abnormal. I’ve never heard him make such a noise. I consider the possibility of dreaming, and try to push my index finger through my palm, it fails. I count my fingers quickly, still concerned about the dog. Five on my left hand. To my horror: four on my right. My pinky or ring finger is missing. I disregard. One more reality check to make sure. I pinch my nose and breathe through it deeply. And then it hits me: I am in a dream. Holy. Cow. I realize my heart has quickened, and some sort of feeling has surged through me, one of achievement and excitement, although it feels nothing like it. I try to calm myself, although I realize I don’t have much time. I look at [the dog], still hacking, and command him, mentally, to stop hacking and get better as I turn around and stride quickly to the front door. He walks with me, no longer sick. I open the front door, and he looks out and at me, but I take no time to say goodbye. I know exactly what I have to do. I notice that it has just rained outside. It is humid, and everything is wet, but the sun is shining through the clouds with a midday’s brightness to the east, as if just rising. Walking out onto the sidewalk in my pajamas, I look into the sky, put all of my trust into my knowledge that this is a dream, and jump. And fall flat onto my back. I feel the concrete, the dirtiness of it, and get up. I jump a few more times, each in futility. [My brother] is there now, with his bottle of water. He looks at me and laughs. I hear a truck coming, and get up to hide. I am in my pajamas after all. I awake. (July 22nd, 2010 – 0429)
Looking back, I find the part with my dog a bit disturbing. I think, before lucidity, that it was taking a sour route. I've had bad dreams with my dog before. What I find more unnerving is the possibility of it becoming a lucid nightmare. When I ignored my dog to test myself, I could feel . . . hate, contempt, and evil radiating from him. It was scary. But I knew I was in control, and thus, fixed it.
I realize I probably need to take a moment for dream stabilization next time. Increasing the vividness, the lucidity. I think I lost it at the very, very end.
What about my failure to fly? I think I just need more confidence. I told myself I could do it, but I think, deep down somewhere, I had begun to question. This led to a loss of lucidity, I think.
Still, success! I feel great! Care to comment?
EDIT: lol, I'm pretty excited, and scared about that lucid nightmare part. *shudder* Looks like I'll be about four hours short on sleep today.
Bookmarks