Hi Lyla! I'm somewhat new to Lucid Dreaming as well, so I'm going through many of the things you are.
About a year ago I had a dream which really spooked me, and a week after that I had a really enjoyable dream; none of them lucid however. They were such powerful dreams, though, and at the time I truly believed I didn't dream anymore!
I tried keeping a dream journal, but for the first six months I remembered nothing, I swear. After those long months I started recalling more dreams, mostly because the simple act of trying to remember dreams in the morning. This practice makes the mind form a habit of prioritizing dreams to remember in the morning, something the majority of people's minds don't do without practice. After about 3 more months, I FINALLY had a lucid dream!!! All that time IS worth it.
I honestly think that what makes so-called "natural" lucid dreamers is the ability to recall dreams well. Many people have been remembering dreams since childhood, so they've already made the habit of waking and recalling. Another thing I have noticed is that people who share dreams, or even talk about what dreams they'd like to have, tend to remember dreams more. Dreams are a very personal thing, and talking about them with real people leaves a lasting impression, in my experience. Talking to people on this forum should really help!
Dream Recall is the hardest part. Seriously: focus EVERY bit of attention you have on remembering your dreams. Before bed, don't even think about LDs, think about some way to remember your dreams only. Dream Recall is what talent plays a role in; some people have been doing it for years, so they DO have an advantage there. However, once you finally remember your dreams (which in my case took six months...) lucid dreaming will come very easy, I promise.
Heck, after a year now I'm STILL focusing on trying to develop dream recall more than LDs, and I've definately made progress. You must keep in mind that dream recall is a habit. Right now, it sounds as if you are in the habit of NOT remembering dreams, although that doesn't mean you can't. The only way to get rid of any bad habit, is to replace it with a good habit.
Lucid dreaming is one of many end-results possible with good dream recall (and IMHO the very best). You gotta get a good foundation, and then the harder parts will be all the easier.
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