Thread: Hi! I'm New, but please read..

A'hoy a'hoy,

I thank anyone that reads this, for I know it looks like a lot.

Recently in the past two to three weeks, I have finally brought my mental or physical problem to the professionals. The information and details within my tests and discussions with these people have brought much interest to sleeping stages, and thus, I searched for it on the internet, and found this website.

Ergo, I hope that the following will be read by anyone on here and that your feedback may be of some support or advice I may greatly be able to use.

The Diagnosis

In the future, I will soon be put through tremendous amounts of tests. Blood tests, phsycials, and possibly even a cat scan. Apparently I have major symptons for:

- A physical disorder, such as: enimiac, brain tumour, or some other deficiency
- Schichzophrenia
- A major sleep disorder
- Unexplained
- etc.

If the tests all prove that I'm phsycially prefectly healthy, then I will be sent to counselling.

The Problem

I've been suffering from day hallucinations for a long period of time in my life and recently they have become more frequent. While conscious, I will have these occurences of hallucinations.. I'm not sure how else to describe them. Most of the time, I will pass out when it happens, sometimes, I just vividly see it, like intense day dreamings. It feels like instense deja vu and a dream mixed together.

Visions I have seen vary completely, however never involve myself. I've only seen things from a vantage point to whatever the vision was. In the last month, I recall having around 8 hallucinations. In the past, it would only be about 1 every 5 months or so.

Whenever a moment like this happens, I also feel a sharp feeling in my left temporal lobe (where your brain processes images along with many other related things) It is not painful, simply a sharp feeling, like an itch, but inside. This indicated them that it may be something physical.

Nothing in life has grown in correlation to these occurences. The closest thing I can feel in closest correlation, are my beliefs. Others say that it is stress in life cause by the amount of bad luck I've been having...

I try to look past that.. this problem I've been having for a long time... and I'm not sure what the end result will be.. depression, is a side result..

How Does This Relate To Lucid Dreaming?

The other possible catalyst for these hallucinations is the fact that I have been having lucid dreams for the entirity of my life. I love these dreams and control them to do whatever I wish, just like all of you.

However, I have been repeatively awakening within the real world and believing it to still be the lucid dream. After reading this website, the "reality checks" is what would seem the to be the best suggestion, however.. I have tried this, and I day hallucinate the reality check the be false (so I'm told).

The fact that I'm aware of this, however, is the sympton for schitzophrenia.

My Lucid Dreaming

My dreams during sleep often portray completely random and abstract things. When in control of it, it is hard to comprehend what is going on and keep lucidity (this also happens in reality with me, thus the drug prescriptions).

Some examples are:

- I created a long stretch of an empty street, with many street lights, and focused upon each streetlights beam of illumination.. and then thanking the light before moving on
- I helped.. something, create a door, and opening it revealed a sky of stars
- Me and another being created a planet
- I manipulated the Earths atmosphere to spin as fast as possible, heal itself.. then implode

My Day Hallucinations

As this is theorised to be confusing lucid dreaming with reality, my self-awareness of this perpetuates the symptons for schitzophrenia and further, unfortunately, induces further day hallucinations.. so believed.

My day hallucinations almost NEVER relate to myself. Examples:

Catalyst:
- I hugged a friend of mine (no faint)
Hallucination:
- Seeing her cry profusely

Catalyst:
- Shaking a mans hand I trained with at a previous job (fainted)
Hallucination:
- A man walking into the job room with a rifle and unloading a fierce burst into everyone

Catalyst:
- Focusing intently upon a busy intersection(fainted)
Hallucination:
- Seeing the intersection carpet bombed, shrapnel and cars attempting to fly out of the mushroom cloud but eventually enveloped into it

Catalyst: (this is my first hallucination that I can remember, when I was 8 years old)
- Watching a movie with family, I zoned out away from the movie and focused on the wall.. listenining intently..
Hallucination(?):
- Hearing a voice whisper to me a date in the future

My Thanks To You

For anyone that took the time to read all of this, my great thanks to you and respects. I appreciate any feedback and your patronage is greatly appreciated in my current life situation.

Thank you,
~ Michael : O'nus[/i]

I hope that everything turns out ok for you...
Do you get enough sleep?
I know if I dont, I can just pass out like that, usualy accompanied by hallucinations.

Welcome to the site O'nus!

I, and others, are pulling for you! Hang in there!

Ok... I'd love to NOT sound nuts to you, but that's just not going to work. Maybe you can just see the end before all of us, maybe(and please don't take me too seriously... unless you want to) all those images and weirdness is trying to tell you something. I mean, maybe even if your not seeing the literal end, maybe you just subconsciously believe it is coming, and it has started to manifest itself into your reality. I don't really "know" anything, but I'm just saying that I think it's weird(at least the ones you described) for these hallucinations to all have this sort of similar theme. I think the date one is what I find really creepy... what was the date... do you know? Anywhere near December 22, 2012? I don't know, man. I talk to a lot of people, and everyone feels something important is happening in our world right now, even if my stupid 2012 theories and all that is just crap. I wonder if you just know more than the rest of us. Prophets come in strange ways and places...

I hope that everything turns out ok for you...
Do you get enough sleep?
I know if I dont, I can just pass out like that, usualy accompanied by hallucinations.

Yes and no. We're not sure wether or not I get enough delta sleep. This is because they guess that I may be fainting due to lack of delta sleep which the body requires as a \"break time\" and since I have more REM sleep then delta, my body may simply force itself into a delta state immediately and spontaneously.

I can't just pass out like that though. Infact, I have a very hard time falling asleep. It sometimes takes me hours to fall asleep.

Ok... I'd love to NOT sound nuts to you, but that's just not going to work. Maybe you can just see the end before all of us, maybe(and please don't take me too seriously... unless you want to) all those images and weirdness is trying to tell you something. I mean, maybe even if your not seeing the literal end, maybe you just subconsciously believe it is coming, and it has started to manifest itself into your reality. I don't really \"know\" anything, but I'm just saying that I think it's weird(at least the ones you described) for these hallucinations to all have this sort of similar theme. I think the date one is what I find really creepy... what was the date... do you know? Anywhere near December 22, 2012? I don't know, man. I talk to a lot of people, and everyone feels something important is happening in our world right now, even if my stupid 2012 theories and all that is just crap. I wonder if you just know more than the rest of us. Prophets come in strange ways and places...

When I was younger, I too thought the date I was told was supposed to be armageddon or something. However, I no longer believe that. I'm beginning to believe it may be the siginificant marking of a world wide realisation of somekind. My guess is as good as anybodies, however, just because I hallucinated a date, doesn't mean it should mark the end of the world.

It's funny because I used to be so hesitant to tell anybody anything remotely relevant to any of this, especially the date.. however, it's:

11.11.07 - Yes, rememberance day.

The significance is still beyond me. It may simply be a complete personal realisation. I couldn't tell you.

What might the significance be of 2012?

Thank you all for your responses,
~ Michael : O'nus[/quote]

However, I no longer believe that. I'm beginning to believe it may be the siginificant marking of a world wide realisation of somekind.[/b]

December 22, 2012 marks the end of the Mayan Calendar date. There are also several other signs that point to this date, including Nostradamus(citing a near date, I believe)(he also stated something like the beginning of the end would start with two towers getting hit by fire rom the sky).

It's also used in as the end date of Terence McKenna's Novelty Theory. He states that is the day when human "novelty" will reach it's highest. So he's saying that on that date, something more "novel" than anything that has ever happened will happen. He marks it as the eschaton, the sort of end.

He and John Major Jenkins(they wrote a book about this subject), and many others, including me and many of my friends, have speculations on whether that will be when a new level of awareness is reached by mankind.

Terence McKenna had a belief that computers, and information sharing, would play a massive role. Maybe we will birth AI, or maybe we will simply link ourselves all together in a world wide network where information flow is pure and instantaneous(for instance... you feel cold, and I live on the other side of the planet and am quite busy doing something, but I can still recognize that you are cold, wayyy over there doing whatever your doing), where we can feel the emotions of every other person in the world. If we can see all the thoughts, feelings, emotions, and everything else of everybody else in the world, and still hold onto our individuality... well.... things will be interesting to say the least. It's a strange thought...

Or maybe we will all just wake up the next day, and nothing will be any different from how it was before. Only time can tell...

Eleven or one? Eleven parts... or one whole? That's what came to mind when I saw your sig. I'm not sure if that means anything to you, but it does to me. Anyway...

First, I want to welcome you to the board and also congratulate you for having the balls to say all that you've said. Most people with such visions tend to remain quiet about them, for fear of society's backlash (i.e. putting a label of 'crazy' on you and locking you away). I just want you to know that, regardless of what anyone in the 'real world' has to say, you are not crazy here. I think I'm going to back Second Attention on this. I think that, perhaps, you can see things that others can't. It manifests in some people but not everyone it manifests in can control it. Maybe the ability is stronger in you? Have any of these hallucinations followed through? For example, your comforting your friend?

I have a rather objective outlook when it comes to ‘mental disorders’, being that I’ve been diagnosed with one myself and my mom works with kids who’ve been diagnosed with something or other. I’ve also been doing some independent study on schizophrenia, split personalities, paranoia, psychopathy, and sociopathy, so I’d like to think that I could make a somewhat educated statement here.

I think that society is too quick to slap a label on what they don’t understand. A girl frantically calls a friend on the telephone. She is scared to death because of a dream she’d had the night before. “Don’t get on the plane,” she tells her friend. “Please, if the tail is blue, or there’s an ‘A’ on it, change your flight. Cancel your flight. Anything, but don’t get on that plane!” Her friend promises to abide by her warning. Anyone else she mentions the dream to laughs at her and calls her crazy. Nothing happens, her friend makes it home safely, and life goes on as normal… Exactly one month later: two planes crash into the World Trade Center. American and United. Take a good look at those planes. And still, people say she’s crazy.

Is she crazy? Is she schizophrenic for seeing things? Or did she see get a glimpse of what was about to happen? Who knows? It’s like Serinanth said in a previous post: two friends are riding in a car. One sees a yellow cab, the other a school bus (or something similar). Who is crazy and who is sane?

You may very well be schizophrenic. One can never truly know the mind of another. But so far, you haven’t described anything that would lead me to that conclusion. (For those who don’t already know, schizophrenics seem to function outside of reality. Or, more accurately, they tend to create their own realities and they function very well within those boundaries.) Given what you’ve told us, and the fact that I’ve personally bore witness to and experienced way too much to ever doubt anything, I’m not about to slap a label on you. Who am I to judge, anyway? We’re all here for one reason—because we dream. We see things that others don’t. I think you do, too.

I know I got a little long-winded and I’m not even sure if I make any sense at all. But, if it helps at all, here’s another person that doesn’t think you’re crazy. I think that you may have prophetic skills. If this is the case, please don’t mistake that for a ‘disorder’. But, at the same time, by all means be concerned with your health. Especially with the fainting. Get checked out and make sure you’re ok. Your health is your first priority. I know we’re strangers, but I do sincerely wish you the best, and I also want to extend an offer of friendship and a sympathetic ear if ever you need it.

And with that, I think I’ll shut up now.

~Willow Mae

Well said Lost Soul! I was wondering where you were
O'nus, I think you will find that this place is very open minded and receptive what some would call strange or different.

Of course, the majority of us are 'different' to begin with

Keep coming back and keep posting! Oh, and tell your friends!

Originally posted by A Lost Soul
Eleven or one? Eleven parts... or one whole? That's what came to mind when I saw your sig. I'm not sure if that means anything to you, but it does to me. Anyway...

Have any of these hallucinations followed through? For example, your comforting your friend?

First, thanks a lot for your time and well thought out replies, all of you!

111 doesn't pertain to any dreams of mine or whatever. It has to deal with my view on society. I see everyone as, wether you like it or not, you're a number. Bank number, SIN, what ever, you're a number.

But, I have managed to pick my own number: 111. Yes, I was able to get my SIN and bank numbers to include 111 within the other digits.

Although it may seem like the most pathetic step in this society, it's atleast some sense of individuality in this manipulated world.

As for if any of the hallucinations following through: yes. Although, the majority have not, and I usually have the inclination that they won't for sometime (which I believe to be after the date).

There are minor ones that weren't so dramatic that came through. Although, the most memorable was.. well.. I'll put it like the others:

Catalyst:
- Christmas eve, and sitting up in the middle of night and thinking about my aunt who was driving..
Hallucination: (no faint)
- A car screeching into a ditch over slippery ice after swerving out of the way from a large truck (not sure what kind of truck at all)
Result:
- My aunt crashed.. well, that happened to her, but she was fine.

There are other, minor, minor things that came true.. Like hallucinating a door opening, and then someone opens it.. or a toilet being flushed, and then one is flushed.. Most of the time you'd think that it's just a subconscious expectation, but, I don't mean these things happened in my close proximity..

So there you have it. Thanks for your replies!!
~ Michael : O'nus

Well, counselors never solve problems, sometimes they try, but they usually just make things worse. Counselors just tell you your problems, they can't do anything to fix them.

I was wondering, maybe you have a special type of ADD, it's most likely not caused by the deficit of attention (well, real true ADD isn't caused by attention or the lack of), where, when you try to focus or something, your brain will do the opposite. Maybe while you're awake , your mind likes to drift into that theta stage quickly. I don't know...

Do you work or live in a place with high radiation levels? I've seen many people here are from Colorado, and an resident in colorado gets the radiation of about 1 chernobyl a year (I think). Serinanth, I forgot where you worked, but you do work at a job with some chance of radiation, right?

It is dumb to be skeptical.

About the end of the world, or mankind, or whatever: Does it matter? Even if it is 2012, and something happens, what are we going to do to stop it?

I'm sure most everyone has had dreams that predicted future events, it's not insanity.

Or maybe I should use non-lead solder from now on...

Originally posted by dougdrums+--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(dougdrums)</div>

Do you work or live in a place with high radiation levels?[/b]

Thanks to growing up in a military family, and my mothers job training, I have actually never lived in one place for longer than two years. So.. I figure that eliminates that.. right?

Originally posted by dougdrums@
About the end of the world, or mankind, or whatever: Does it matter? Even if it is 2012, and something happens, what are we going to do to stop it?

You never know...

<!--QuoteBegin-dougdrums
Or maybe I should use non-lead solder from now on...

lol

~ Michael : O'nus

Yeah, my dad is in the military, now if I live somewhere for more than two years, I feel like I have to move.

My brother in law is szytsophenic( sorry about the sp ) and you dont sound this way to me, you actually sound pretty level headed.

Originally posted by jill1978
My brother in law is szytsophenic( sorry about the sp ) and you dont sound this way to me, you actually sound pretty level headed.

lol.. I'll take that as a compliment. Thank you

I have yet to find out any results on any tests too... It seems that it will take a while. Be sure that I'll post the results..

Thank you for the reply,

~ Michael : O'nus

if the health tests all come out okay, i'd find an alternative therapist. one who is not caught up in labelling gifted minds like yours as "disordered".

someone on these posts mentioned that counselors tell you what your problems are and usually make things worse. i have had an opposite experience. my therapist ( a referral from a friend) ended up being WONDERFULLY alternative. very down to earth but also very open to symbolism, dreams, regressive communication, etc etc. she helped me greatly and never once told me what my problems were. she barely even guided me to my problems. she constantly reminded me "this is your time. this is for you. you are the boss. what do you want to accomplish in these sessions?"

i guess my point here is BE PICKY. find someone who is open, not LEADING you towards any opinion. be true to your inner voice that will tell you if this person can be trusted for your situation. you will know.

now, are you having all these tests and letting yourself be studied because this "problem" is interferring with your life? sometimes our quarks are just quarks and accepting them is all we need to do. of course sometimes they stop us from having healthy, productive lives. definition of healthy and productive = one you are happy with. i'm sure some people in society would define it differently - being that they like to put everyone in boxes.

good luck on your venture. just be you. if your "problems" get in the way of you being you, then get help. that's my only advice - and i hate giving advice.

btw, good comments y'all!


peace out
: )
w

A counselors and theripists are two different things.

Maybe I'm just negitive...

Well considering my financial status.. I'm only able to take free volunteer counselling..

Basically students in study trying out their education... real fun... considering I know more about psychology than some...

*Sigh* I can't even afford the medications being prescribed to me either.

So yeah.. I'm in a rut..

If anyones got some spare money, you can send it to me!!

~ Michael : O'nus

It sounds a good bit like narcolepsy... Have you been tested for that?

Originally posted by DAL9000
It sounds a good bit like narcolepsy... Have you been tested for that?

Yeah kinda. Everyone keeps avoiding saying that and instead goes into large detail of the theorised sleeping disorder of mine, instead of just saying, "Narcolepsy".

I say, "Yeah kinda" because I'm still in the midst of many other tests.

Thanks for the question!

~ Michael : O'nus

Well, narcolepsy is more than just falling asleep... Very often victims of it are very concious while their bodies are paralyzed and have waking hallucinations... The fainting attacks are usually brought on by intense emotion of some sort, like laughter or fear, etc... It seems to be related to a lack of melatonin producing cells in the brain (at least I *think* that's the neurochemical), and they're pretty close to coming up with a treatment for it... It's kinda funny really, the neuroscientist that discovered the link had tried to find it for years without success, but immediately stumbled across it by accident when he tried to identify another neurochemical involved in eating while trying to develop a new diet pill...

</UselessInfoRant>

Originally posted by DAL9000
Well, narcolepsy is more than just falling asleep... Very often victims of it are very concious while their bodies are paralyzed and have waking hallucinations... The fainting attacks are usually brought on by intense emotion of some sort, like laughter or fear, etc... It seems to be related to a lack of melatonin producing cells in the brain (at least I *think* that's the neurochemical), and they're pretty close to coming up with a treatment for it... It's kinda funny really, the neuroscientist that discovered the link had tried to find it for years without success, but immediately stumbled across it by accident when he tried to identify another neurochemical involved in eating while trying to develop a new diet pill...

</UselessInfoRant>

The only real complication with narcolepsy in my case, is that I will have many hallucinary attacks and not fall unconscious.

Otherwise, yeah, it would definitly sound like it.

Thanks for the "UselessInfoRant"!

yes, but, a good guide does not tell you how things are, they simply guide you on your own self-discovery. their title doesn't really matter. besides, look at parents for example, how effective is it when they tell us what our problem is and then how to fix it? rarely works.

in my posts, particularly those responding to requests for dream interpretation, i try to hold back. humans have a tendency to say "this is what your dream means" when in all reality, we really don't know. our interpretations of other folks dreams are merely that - interpretation. like i've heard it been said, we are our own best dream interpreters. that's why i'm leary of people on postings (or counselors and therapists) who speak in definates when interpreting someone elses dreams (or life) - be it helpful-hearted or just the human tendency of egotism. i struggle daily to save others from myself. ha ha

anyway. put that in your back pocket. or not.

peace out
: )
w

i wonder how "crazy" you'll be once you start getting some REAL SLEEP!!

it may be as simple as that.

sometimes i wonder if your lack of sleep is allowing your brain to be connected to something bigger than us - something that knows and sees the future - something our minds and society are not evolved enough to understand or handle yet.

like they say, we use less than 10% of our brains!


: )
w

Yeah, I really have no clue what your dream means, but I can guess

Originally posted by Paikea
yes, but, a good guide does not tell you how things are, they simply guide you on your own self-discovery. their title doesn't really matter. besides, look at parents for example, how effective is it when they tell us what our problem is and then how to fix it? rarely works.

in my posts, particularly those responding to requests for dream interpretation, i try to hold back. humans have a tendency to say \"this is what your dream means\" when in all reality, we really don't know. our interpretations of other folks dreams are merely that - interpretation. like i've heard it been said, we are our own best dream interpreters. that's why i'm leary of people on postings (or counselors and therapists) who speak in definates when interpreting someone elses dreams (or life) - be it helpful-hearted or just the human tendency of egotism. i struggle daily to save others from myself. ha ha

anyway. put that in your back pocket. or not.

peace out
: )
w

Well, in my situation, I don't know anyone who has enough time to interrogate and try to figure out my problems; they've all got enough of their own. But hey, if you know anyone that does, let me know!!

Originally posted by dougdrums
Yeah, I really have no clue what your dream means, but I can guess

I'm insane!!!! I will kill you!! Mwah hahaha!

Thank you for your replies,

~ Michael : O'nus