What steps do you take before you sleep to induce a calmer sleep?
To get a good nights sleep with less feelings of being rushed or under pressure I suggest doing something calming before bed. Another thing you can do is do some autosuggestion -- say something like "I will relax in my dreams" over and over in your head. Try to imagine how that will feel.
What are some ways that I could train myself to realize dreams are dreams?
To learn how to lucid dream I suggest you start here. This tutorial covers the basics of lucid dreaming. You also should read over the Reality Check (RC) tutorial here.
I have read a few, such as drawing an image or letter on my hand, or looking in a mirror. But I feel like to be able to control myself in a dream I would already have to be lucid.
Dream control and control of yourself in LDs comes with time.
I have been writing in a dream diary for a bit now, trying to make myself remember dreams more often, hoping that this would make it easier for me to dream more intensely.
Good! That is the most important thing you can do to improve your dream recall.
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