Things To Ponder

[Howie]

TEN THINGS TO PONDER FOR 2007 #10 Life is sexually transmitted. #9 Good health is merely the slowest rate at which one can die #8 Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich. #7 Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks. #6 Some people are like a slinky... not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs. #5 Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in the hospital dying of nothing. #4 All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism. #3 Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars, and a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents??? #2 In the 60's, people took LSD to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal. AND THE NUMBER ONE THOUGHT FOR 2007: We know exactly where one cow with mad-cow disease is located among the millions and millions of cows in America, and where one strain of e-coli got into the spinach, but we haven't a clue as to how to apprehend thousands of known criminals, including serial killers, pedophiles, Internet predators, identity thieves, would-be and actual terrorists, foreign students whose visas have expired, illegal aliens, suspect members of Congress, crooked CEO's and CFO's etc. Maybe we should just put the Department of Agriculture in charge of everything.

[Burns]

#8 Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.[/b] Hahaha, nice one.

[Ynot]

- Why do all electrical goods fail a week after the warranty is up? - Why do people drive to a gym, peddle on a bike that doesn't go anywhere, then drive home?

[DeadDollKitty]

LOL #1 and #8 are my favorites ~R~

[purple raevyn]

#7 Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks. haha, there's actually truth to that. i just got back online 2 weeks ago, and i havent felt hungry once.

[flight]

#6 Some people are like a slinky... not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs. [/b] lol, yeah know a few people like that.

[pj]

#5 Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in the hospital dying of nothing. [/b] Giving credit where credit is due, this is a Redd Foxx quote. And a GREAT one.

[AlternateReality]

- Why do people drive to a gym, peddle on a bike that doesn't go anywhere, then drive home? [/b] Lol that makes so much sence. Always hated them bikes, the only thing they should be used for is to make electricity...

[Lucky27]

-We have people saying oaths in courtrooms, prior to saying things we decide to disbelieve and send them to jail.

[Oneironaut Zero]

How come death row inmates, when given lethal injections, are swabbed down with alcohol first?

[Ne-yo]

#9 Good health is merely the slowest rate at which one can die[/b] This is all too true. LOL

[Burns]

How come death row inmates, when given lethal injections, are swabbed down with alcohol first? [/b] Alcohol helps reveal the vein for a proper venipuncture. We have to use alcohol before giving a euthanasia injection too.

[Lucky27]

-Some people in third-world countries dying of starvation, while others in more wealthy coutries or dying from (symptoms of) obesity.

[The Blue Meanie]

Alcohol helps reveal the vein for a proper venipuncture. We have to use alcohol before giving a euthanasia injection too.[/b] I don't know why, but that's creepy. Made me shudder. ICK, Burns!

[Umbrasquall]

#6 Some people are like a slinky... not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.[/b] I don't know why but I smiled at this one.