Thread: Selfmade Man

Ophelia:
Being married for a while, with a good relationship.... I've picked up some interesting things about women. Sounds stereotypical - perhaps I mean 'many' women.
Sometimes its hard to pin down exactly what it is.. mostly feelings.

In any event, Ophelia, you're explaining things really well
And the guys here seem to be gaining a lot from it.
Me included. Ive never tried to put these things down in writing. Set in stone.

As for changing personalities?... I find that one bit of advice comes back to the tibetan monks and their dream yoga.
They believe in meditating, like many other spiritual techniques. But they believe in listening to their thoughts, and being mindful of them at all times.
Eg. those zen gardens (sand with rakes).. they are intended to be soothing, meditative, but not entirely introspective
They enable you to meditate, but not to ENTIRELY lose touch with the surroundings. Of course, their football field zen gardens are thebest for this
That way they bridge the gap between being unaware of your thoughts and being mindful and meditative while performing normal daily tasks.

I think what I'm saying is that learning to be mindful of your thoughts at all times is both difficult and very rewarding in many areas.
It will both help lucid dreams, your personality, and your perspective on life. Hell.. it might even help for psychic abilities if you're fortunate (These psychic self-help things prescribe the same therapy of listening to your thoughts)

BTW, when you do start listening to your thoughts well enough, you'll notice that we are all a little schizo deep inside. We have different trains of thought going on in our heads.
And No - I don't need a therapist - This isn't only my personal observation

Another suggestion - that subliminal messages program I wrote may help you perhaps. Messages like 'Awareness', 'Look around', 'Notice Thoughts', 'Thinking?'... stuff like that. May help.
No promises, just a suggestion

at one point i was sure i'm schizophrenic
it kinda fits what i was going through... maybe i am but it makes no diffence becouse i was aware of it! i was aware of thinking paranoid thoughts that seemed to have no sense but they made ALL sense to me!
i could rationelize them all but the probabilety of them being actualy true was very very low!

and yeah i think everyone has some kind of fucked up thought patterns they're not really aware of... (or even instincts!)

anyway... relationships betwine men and weman were mentioned alot and i though i'd give this link... maybe some of you know it already...
just makes me laugh every time i read some of it...
its called "Things my girl friend and I argue about"

http://www.mil-millington.com/

The problem is that we are not just our conscious mind. There are things that we are not aware of, that have been repressed and sent into out uncounscious, that also play a role in defining who we are and what we feel. Why me may never become aware that we are having these, we should still try and analize if the way we act is the way we honestly truly want to, and if it fits who we want to be or who we feel like.

Each of us has a different sense of morality that has been inbedded into us by every experience we have been through. Thus what I think is right might be wrong for you. That is what in the end comes to define what we want to be. We must analyze our behavior, trace it back and make sure it is justified. By doing this we won't betray our true instincts of being...

in fact maybe all are a bit schizophrenic(or how the hell u spell it). It's possible that a lot of us have another personality, burried deep inside ourself under another personality that have been "forced" to us by our friends and relatives...

that's very true... we all seem to have several faces... one for our family, one for our friends, one for work, one for play... it just depends on what kind of person you are. but yes, just be like paperdoll and the world with be a happy, sunny, fun-filled place.

and ct did that comment have a biblical innuendo?

adidas is right. We all have several personalities, for different aspects of our lives. When I'm one on one with some one i act far different than with a group. I'm more reserved and thoughtful one on one, so I just have to work on making that a dominant personality. Ophelia, I'm lovin the tips, any more would be greatly appreciated.

Originally posted by kickbackseifer
adidas is right. We all have several personalities, for different aspects of our lives.

I'll third that thought. I noticed a while back that I tend to behave differently from friend to friend as well. But it's usually the friend that I can be "more reserved and thoughtful one on one" with, who is easier to develop a romance with.

That is true, we aren't the same person with everyone. I have known this and have observed that in my behavior for quite some time, and have tried my best to be as congruent to my personality as possible with anyone I am with. Most people will agree that I am the same with them as I am here, or with other people. I just don't like having to be a different person for some and another for others. I rather be the purest essense of me all the time. If others don't like it, well, nobody is forcing them to be my friends. I think that it is much better to live like that.

Originally posted by adidas
ct did that comment have a biblical innuendo?

Yeah...it does. I don't read the bible or such but it is a pretty obvious one...and hilarious too

and ct did that comment have a biblical innuendo?[/b]

Yes, quite.

Originally posted by Truthbearer
That is true, we aren't the same person with everyone. I have known this and have observed that in my behavior for quite some time, and have tried my best to be as congruent to my personality as possible with anyone I am with. Most people will agree that I am the same with them as I am here, or with other people. I just don't like having to be a different person for some and another for others. I rather be the purest essense of me all the time. If others don't like it, well, nobody is forcing them to be my friends. I think that it is much better to live like that.

That shows you have integrity, imho. It takes alot of effort for me to get into a habit like that. But well worth it to try.

You realise that being different to different people implies being 'two faced'
Of course, thats the negative word for it... not criticising.


I don't deviate my personality much between people... only perhaps being more irritable to some than others. Usually with good reason.
And of course, previous private history with the person may create 'private jokes' etc. (eg my wife)

But other than that... I'm the same with everyone except my boss