I give up because...idk why but whenever I go lucid I for one can't really control myself, I do feel like I control myself but my toughts are not all there, I think stupid, heck I even ran into the wall 5 times saying "It's a dream I MUST BE ABLE TO GET TROUGH IT" everytime just ending to bounce back with my shoulder hurting ... XD but anyways whenever I get lucid I either end up paralised in bed with no ability to get out and just wake up fast, or I end up being lucid without control over anything.

Basically what's bothering me is whenever I try to call out my subcouncious the lucid dream ALWAYS turns into a nightmare, once it was hearing people lock up the surroundings of the house and then run in chasing me where I melt into the floor and escape outside and then can't see a thing as my view is blurry but hear people all around me running to me screaming "THERE HE IS GET HIM!", another time a tiger jumped me out of nowhere and well....tried to kill me and so on, and if I ask before sleeping something about my sub-c(usually what do I have to do to talk to you) my regular dream is either me getting lost or hunted by armed men and then I "Wake up" where I'm actually in a false awakening but I am so tired that I want to go back to sleep instantly but the moment I close my eyes my sub-c makes me sence the WILD'ing sensations of shaking and all, cept it's REALLY PAINFULL and scary and if I break free from the sensacions due to sleepyness I can't get away and just close my eyes again and all over again and if I do give up then I will feel like my soul was ripped away from my body and dragged SO FAST that the "Wind" hurts too and then I will end up lucid but wake up for real like 5 seconds later. And every time I wake up I end up being sad or scared, my Sub-c hates me for some reason and idk why I mean even when I meditate it attacks me >_>......and as far as I know sub-c should be like you, but that is SO not like me, I am sencitive and enjoy watching love, cuddling, basically everything gentle XD

So yah I give up, a person I hold very dear shouted at me to stop it already that it's just hurting me and nothing else. (That person talks to their sub-c and apparently their sub-c is always with mine but apparently my sub-c is acting all like me gentle, loving and caring.....so....I am out of ideas what is going on)