Hehe. Well "control" is a word with many definitions.

Some non-lucid dreams are sort of "slept through." You see what is going on, but you aren't necessarily Affecting anything, even your own actions.

In some non-lucid dreams you actually Feel like you're in the situation. You have "control" over your body just as you do in the waking world.

In some lucid dreams you are simply an observer. You know you are dreaming, but you don't necessarily Choose to control your own actions. This is simply a lucid form of the first dream I spoke of.

In some lucid dreams you are yourself, and have control of yourself, while deciding not to affect many, if any, of the factors around you. (These have given me the most exciting LD adventures, so far.)

And in some lucid dreams, still, you have control over yourself, and a comfortable ability to affect everything around you: the color of the sky, the rotation of the earth, the uhm...inhibitions of the opposite sex? Hah. Just to name a few.

As far as reality checks go, it depends on how you come to Do the reality check. If you're just doing it because "Hey, I haven't done a reality check in a while, let me do one," and you find out you're dreaming, that was not lucidly Willing to do a reality check. But if you're thinking "Hmm.....this is strange...I wonder if....," and then you do a reality check, to find out you're dreaming, that means you were bringing yourself into lucidity, and verified it with a reality check.

Hope this helps.