Two nights ago i couldn't fall all the way asleep. the dogs were snoring and making noise and barking and my body was suffering the way waitresses' bodies do at the end of the weekend. i began to drift off and thought i heard a spatter of rain outside and the murmur of thunder. then the hair on my arms began to rise and i felt that electrical tickle that comes on if you get caught out when lightening is approaching. it grew until i felt like i was holding onto an electric fence, paralyzed with a painful surge of electricity filling my body. i grabbed my husband's arm and slurred his name (this took all my will to do) and woke him up. he remembers this so i know at least that much was real. i felt like i had to hold onto him or i would either float away or be struck by lightenting. as i began to fully awake, this feeling died down and disappeared. don't know what it was. it was wet outside the next morning, but after i awoke during this episode i did not hear the rain anymore. real or no?
at last i fell asleep. and "awoke" in a farmhouse version of the house i grew up in which is in a vinyl siding cookie-cutter development in rl. i decided to take a stab at projecting since maybe that was what had begun earlier. this time i wouldn't be afraid. so i walked out on the porch and made it dark by thinking it so bc i thought would be uneasy trying it in the light-- it was like night on the porch but daylight outside the porch! sat down in the porch swing and concentrated on that pissing on the fence feeling again and presto!- floated right out and took off toward the sky doing a breast-stroke. when i looked down at the yard and the neighborhood i came back down but could take off at will again. off and on i would be aware i was dreaming and make some sort of change, change the scene or my location in it instantly, pass through cielings and walls-- once i got my head halfway through the wall and got stuck, then i remembered, oh yeah! i'm dreaming and slipped through with ease. after a bit i forgot i was dreaming and walked into my parents' fictional-version bedroom and said look! i'll prove i can fly, and began swimming in the air over their bed and around the rather small room as they watched in amazement. i think i even said, see! it's not a dream, i can really fly! i was careful not to hit my head in the corners or crash into them. owell.
the strange thing about all this is-- i dreamed i was awake and decided to have a lucid dream within the dream! whatever works.