 Originally Posted by Noogah
What I'm trying to say is, by dedicating part of our time, life, mind, and soul to an object, character, or even a plush toy, it seems that in a sense they have a kind of "life" inside of you. I mean, in a movie, when a character dies, you feel genuine emotion, as though part of you is gone. By hundreds of people lending a partition of their mind and soul to a character, or inanimate object, it seems to me that the object gains a sort of "life"
Anybody agree?
when I was seven years old I watched this anime. from the moment the main characters came on screen, I understood them. I loved them.
but it was also an adult anime with a dramatic ending that gave me a nightmare that very night. the nightmare was so horrifying, the only thing I remember was the sound of my own scream as I woke up.
well thanks to that combination, the characters have lived in my head since. if I let my imagination play, they are very life like. so life like....
there is this particular dream-character. and when I dream with him, I always identify him as my male half. 'he' is literally the other me. if I become lucid, 'he' disappears. And nothing I can do can summon him.
The only thing I can think of is that he is literally a part of me. And when I become lucid my male half no longer exists outside of me, because I am him. what am I babbling about??
well...one time in a dream, I spent the entire time looking for one of the anime-characters. when I found the character, I felt something. It's hard to describe. It's felt like finding a soul mate. It felt like finding a part of myself.
but after I became lucid, he vanishes before my eyes. Just like my 'male half'.
****************
why do we cry over mere imaginary characters? the answer lies with the subconscious. the subconscious doesn't make reality distinctions. what is being experienced is always 'real'.
so all imaginary characters that you love, are 'real' to your subconscious
now the fun part is.....why would the subconscious daydream about an imaginary character? Well, I believe the answer is metaphysical. I believe the answer has to do with reality being created by thought.
in this belief, humans do not have the power to create life *because you can not create energy*. we can only give life. by means of giving a part of our own consciousness *living energy* to something else
enter the obsessed fan - subconsciously trying to give life to an imaginary character. the end result is a thoughtform. a tulpa still living on the mental realm
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tulpa
all thoughtform entities are the same. they exist and live only because a consciousness thinks *gives energy* to them. what does this mean? it's hungry for your attention.
think I'm crazy?? probably. but my story doesn't end here
in fact, I'm so crazy, I'm willing to say that the two characters in my head.......don't just live in my head. they are alive in a mental realm, and they are hungry
why did I come to this crazy conclusion?
once apon a time I found this amazing fanart and fancomics. I looked at this fanart...and I felt this weird buzz of energy...this fanart looks a lot like my imagination!!!
It was weird..Too weird. Like someone came inside my head and made illustrations of it.
Now the artist doesn't speak english. And I don't speak japanese. What were the chances that these two characters would 'play' the same in our imagination?
And a strange thought came to me....what if the imagination in my head isn't mine???? what if the imagination in my head..is the SAME imagination she is experiencing?
What if these imaginary characters..aren't so imaginary?
I told you that when I was seven years old I had a nightmare after watching the anime. I told you that I loved the characters. But what I forgot to tell you was..I was not obsessed with the anime until I woke up that morning from my nightmare. It was the nightmare that made me obsessed. Simultaneously, I hated the characters. I hated the anime. I hated all of it. I hated it because I was obsessed.
And already at the age of seven I would have told you I hated it because it wouldn't leave my mind.
Something is wrong and I decided I needed to remember the nightmare to understand. The only nightmare in my entire life that I could not remember any of it upon waking.
Last year was my first attempt to recall the nightmare.
In a dream I shout out that I am ready to revisit the nightmare. Instantly a portal appears in my dream. And I know that all I have to do is fly in, and I would revisit the memory, understand, and move on with my life.
As I fly up to the portal two dark male entities drag me down. And pin me to my bed. They threaten me. Their voices were indescribable, barely words, more like sub-human growling. Low, throaty, dark voices. I couldn't stand the sound, I had to wake myself up.
I sickening feeling came to me when I woke up.......because there are two characters living in my head, and they are male. A disgusting thought, that all this time I had been giving my precious energy to these two dark entities, that have plagued my subconscious, since the nightmare I had at age seven!!
This is what made me believe that they were tulpas in the astral/mental realm. And not just figments of my imagination.
The problem? They aren't mine. I didn't come up with them. I didn't create them. The tulpas were originally created by the anime author. With millions of fans giving them energy, they were 'alive' and hungry long before I saw the anime. If you read up on tibetan tulpa stories, most of the tulpas have the same fate...they become 'dark'.
But what about the dream where I felt that the Character loved me back as I loved him? That Character was NOT the tulpa. That Character was me. The part of myself that was stolen by the tulpa, and I was reclaiming that part of me back
one down, one more to go
ps, I still can't recall the nightmare
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