Ok..Truthbearer...seriously...put down the knife.
As far as I can see, you're a really cool and smart person. Your self-esteem may not be that high, but neither was mine up until just a little while ago. I would just like to assure you that you aren't a moron by any stretch.
okay, so you hate yourself because you were insulted & stuff in 7th grade , ill tell you something, from the 1st to 8th class (in holland, it is the whole primary school), i was kicked to death (read as: not really dead, but close) and insulted and stuff and noone did something about it, noone, even when my mother came to school, they just ignored it. every and every day again (god i loved the holidays) and then, in the 2nd half of the 8th year on primary school, till now, in 2nd class secondary school, it all goes well, and do i try to kill myself in my lucid dreams? NO! i cant even get lucid, and if i could, i would spend my time with beter things, in stead of stabbing myself to death and hate myself, my advise is: stop this nonsence and love yourself or something . or else i will have to get your phonenumber to play for psychiatrist (read this in an extremely sarcastic way) .
Truthbearer you should love yourself because it isn't your fault you were bullied. Honestly, those people were just jerks. You need to realize this, because you are a cool person and it wasn't your fault. I went through the same stage of thinking that. I was bullied when I was younger.
On the note of the dream, it was probably just your inner-reasoning realizing that you really shouldn't hate yourself. Of course, it certainly wasn't me. *shift eyes* *runs away*
You are a beautiful person with a wonderful heart, but you're covering it with your past and holding on to the griefand pain. Letting go of grief and pain is a wonderful feeling, believe me! It stops sudden outbursts of tears and allows me to sleep soundly at night. Because of my release, the future is bright and full of wonderful things for me to experience, just as there are wonderful things out in the world for you to experience! I love you, Truthbearer, as a friend and fellow human being.
Anyway, Truthbearer. This is tubcat speaking, and as you know tubcat rules all and he decides what happens in this universe.
I order you to start loving yourself and seeing the beauty that every soul posseses. I order you to love yourself for it is hard to love others if you cannot love yourself. I order you to focus on the positive instead of the negative. I order you to forget about the past, the past is over and the people whom picked on you are now irrelevant.You are who you are right now, and it is time to start seeing the beauty and love inside your own soul. Ask yourself why it is necessary to have low self esteem and what the use of it is. Ask yourself why not smile at the warmth inside of yourself and inside of this world.
I order you to really read and SEE what everybody here is saying.
We, all of us are saying that you are NOT moron, that you should LOVE YOURSELF because there are alot of POSITIVE aspects about you. Do you see, none of us hate you. There is no reason to hate yourself.
Some people here said that if you keep believing that you are some sort of retard you become one, now, believe you are a beautiful person and so shall you be one.
I, tubcat, am concerned with all human beings. You ARE a human being and a soul! Like everybody else, with equal rights, and you are special and unique (in a positive way) like everybody else. Ask yourself yet again, why am I doing this? Everybody here tells me I am not a retard, the past is over and here I am. Hating myself where instead I could love and smile at myself, and then smile at the people aswell.
End message.
Listen to Tubcat, hon *flaming accent*. Anyway, Im sorry I do not usually like to be blunt and just confront people like that. But you need to recognise the fact that I am not bashing you at all(non of us are). I am telling you to open your eyes and see yourself, see the beauty we all posses, and to see what we are really saying.
Whatever happened to self compassion? Forget about self pity, you dont feel that. But whatever happend to self compassion?
I shall make it clear yet again,I am not telling you that you are being stupid or annoying in whatever way. And you are not harming anybody else. But we are all just concerned Take tubcat's words to be genuine (sorry Im just silly) and meant to be kind, I promise you they are. What else can I say...find the love, boy!
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