Computer Horror Story

**ninja9578** · 09-13-2007 03:56 AM

A young computer scientist was fiddling around with how to encrypt entire discs so they they could be sent across wires without being hijacked and if they were, no one would know what they were.

He thought of the idea to encrypt discs as loss-less music files. He would use their digital signature to make sounds, even though to the ear they would sound like static, they would hold the entire disc image. He knew that because certain program accepted scripts embedded in music files he would need to use the backwards signature of the disc.

He was encrypting discs late one night and then he came upon a disc that he had never seen before. The top of it was severely scratched, but he figured it probably was important because it was locked away so he went to work encrypting it.

While the CD played backwards he suddenly heard terrible sounds, they were the sounds of people being tortured, and pigs being slaughtered, and demons laughing and telling him to do horrible things.

After it was over he was too terrified to move and his buddy came in and noticed it. He asked what was wrong and they programmer pointed at the disc and uttered rambling sentences about the devil.

"Oh, this disc," the older buddy said, knowing what it was. "Let me show you the real reason it's down at the bottom of the drawer. The sounds of hell is nothing compared to this." He took the disc to an old computer, despite the programmer begging him not to.

He placed the disc in the drive and typed a few commands. When the programmer saw what was on the screen he cried out and fainted in horror. It said... "Installing Windows."

**♥Mark** · 09-13-2007 04:00 AM

Gee, didn't see that one coming.

**Idec Sdawkminn** · 09-13-2007 04:51 AM

I LOL'd.

**Alban** · 09-13-2007 05:59 AM

Ah tis true. So, so true.
*fantasizes about games and 3D apps on Debian*

**Identity X** · 09-13-2007 02:54 PM

Rubbishest thread EVAR!!!

**italianmonkey** · 09-29-2007 12:38 AM

having right now been tortured by my windows pc once more, my hatred is big enough to say that this story is ART

**Grod** · 10-25-2007 03:22 AM

I. LIKE. WINDOWS.

You hurt mah feelings.

**Sornaensis** · 10-25-2007 10:35 PM

Originally Posted by Rasenganxxchidori

I. LIKE. WINDOWS.

You hurt mah feelings.

No one cares! :p

Wow, that was funny. Not really, tho. J.k. [rowling].

Ugh. Spaming again

I do prefer linux over windoze, tho.

**bro** · 10-26-2007 04:30 AM

Hahhaaahh...that was actually really good...indeed I did, as we say, "laugh out louds" (lulz).

**Identity X** · 10-26-2007 10:16 AM

Originally Posted by bro

Hahhaaahh...that was actually really good...indeed I did, as we say, "laugh out louds" (lulz).

No it wasn't it was bigotted and stupid, devoid of any real wit or intellect, and only served to childishly dilute the often genuine criticisms against Windows (which is not spelt "Windoze", a practice I find abhorrent).

Seriously, regardless of whether the original poster wrote this or not, he did post it, and therefore I suggest he either (a) grow up, or (b) learn to be funny.

**Grod** · 10-27-2007 04:00 AM

Originally Posted by Seismosaur

No one cares! :p

Wow, that was funny. Not really, tho. J.k. [rowling].

Ugh. Spaming again

I do prefer linux over windoze, tho.

Ugh... Linux?! Come on. Mac OS 10 is so much better than linux... I don't get why people like linux. Seriously, there's nothing good about it. Mac is much easier to use, user friendly, and accessible. What can Linux do? Boot in 10 seconds? Linux is a waste of time.

**Ynot** · 10-27-2007 04:42 AM

Originally Posted by Rasenganxxchidori

Ugh... Linux?! Come on. Mac OS 10 is so much better than linux... I don't get why people like linux. Seriously, there's nothing good about it. Mac is much easier to use, user friendly, and accessible. What can Linux do? Boot in 10 seconds? Linux is a waste of time.

cause different people want different things
there is no "one size fits all"

some people want a fast server OS that never delays disk access for anything
some people want a desktop OS that never delays GUI redrawing for anything
some people want an OS so small, it can boot over their network for a diskless case in the living room

there's countless different scenarios (hence many, many different distros of linux - each catering a different need / situation)

I see in your profile that you're a graphic designer. Mac's cater very well for your situation
but it doesn't do everything

**Sornaensis** · 10-27-2007 05:53 PM

Originally Posted by Ynot

cause different people want different things
there is no "one size fits all"

some people want a fast server OS that never delays disk access for anything
some people want a desktop OS that never delays GUI redrawing for anything
some people want an OS so small, it can boot over their network for a diskless case in the living room

there's countless different scenarios (hence many, many different distros of linux - each catering a different need / situation)

I see in your profile that you're a graphic designer. Mac's cater very well for your situation
but it doesn't do everything

Neither does linux. But it's getting there! At least it DOESN'T do what windows loves to: Crash, throw garbage errors out, completely f*ck up the most trivial aspects of running a computer, and boot up sloooowwwwllyyyy.

**Burzhi** · 10-27-2007 06:28 PM

I'd just like to add that most of the retarded Windows bashers ironically even use Windows themselves.

Personally, I run Windows XP at home. This allows me to play games and run Windows applications. However, I always have an SSH connection open to a Linux or FreeBSD server in PuTTY. I get the best of both Windows and POSIX operating systems, IMHO.

Sure, Linux has a set of fairly decent GUIs available, but they really aren't that great. Its command line, however, is awesome, making Linux suitable to simply open up an SSH connection to and use to all of its capability, whilst also running Windows.

In 5 years, I am hoping to see Windows become completely obselete - it only prides itself upon the software available and developed for it. Let's face it, at the moment, if you don't have Windows available to you, you are missing out on something in some respect or another. An improvement in Linux's available GUIs and user-friendliness will increase its userbase, and therefore increase the rate of software development for it.

It can only get better for Linux.

**ninja9578** · 10-27-2007 06:51 PM

Originally Posted by Burzhi

I'd just like to add that most of the retarded Windows bashers ironically even use Windows themselves.

I haven't used Windows in years.

Mac has the same command line functionality as Linux, it is UNIX underneath after all.

**Ynot** · 10-27-2007 07:32 PM

Originally Posted by Burzhi

I'd just like to add that most of the retarded Windows bashers ironically even use Windows themselves.

there's a big difference between using windows, and having to support it

if, indeed, someone bashes windows and voluntarily still uses it, then yes, he's a moron
but I guess it's the way of the world - better the devil you know than the devil you don't

but if you have to support it (being the computer guy in your company, or you work in any customer facing job in IT) then you're going to have to support windows - regardless of your own personal views
These people are generally the most vocal

Ironically, the reason cited by most people for sticking with MS, is that changing OS is too complicated and time consuming
Well, right now, there's little difference in the "pain 'n suffering" department between XP --> Vista and XP --> anything else

**Grod** · 10-28-2007 04:19 AM

Originally Posted by Ynot

cause different people want different things
there is no "one size fits all"

some people want a fast server OS that never delays disk access for anything
some people want a desktop OS that never delays GUI redrawing for anything
some people want an OS so small, it can boot over their network for a diskless case in the living room

there's countless different scenarios (hence many, many different distros of linux - each catering a different need / situation)

I see in your profile that you're a graphic designer. Mac's cater very well for your situation
but it doesn't do everything

Yeah... I'll admit, I'm pretty biased. Linux just isn't my style. Hmm, I didn't know it could do all those things. Maybe I should research my points before I make them.

**Burzhi** · 10-28-2007 03:27 PM

Linux just isn't my style. Hmm, I didn't know it could do all those things. Maybe I should research my points before I make them.

Oh? Do please elaborate. If anything, Linux supports EVERY style possible, with the number of slight alternatives and differentations it provides in the way of distros.

In many respects, Linux is MUCH more user-friendly than Window.

e.g. Your system will automatically update all the software you install when available, not just the OS itself.

e.g. To download and install a program, you simply type: apt-get install program name (differs dependent on distro, but all same concept). No trying to find BS pirate copies of stuff (or wasting money on them)

e.g. Destitution of truly effective viruses (anybody who incorrectly calls them "Virii" in an failed attempt to sound clever must be flogged), thus little paranoia in comparison.

etc..

**Grod** · 10-28-2007 05:16 PM

Originally Posted by Burzhi

Oh? Do please elaborate. If anything, Linux supports EVERY style possible, with the number of slight alternatives and differentations it provides in the way of distros.

In many respects, Linux is MUCH more user-friendly than Window.

e.g. Your system will automatically update all the software you install when available, not just the OS itself.

e.g. To download and install a program, you simply type: apt-get install program name (differs dependent on distro, but all same concept). No trying to find BS pirate copies of stuff (or wasting money on them)

e.g. Destitution of truly effective viruses (anybody who incorrectly calls them "Virii" in an failed attempt to sound clever must be flogged), thus little paranoia in comparison.

etc..

Dude... If you read my post I said I like MAC. I work in graphic design so that caters to my need. Mac is perfect for me. Using Mac, I don't get viruses. I have a PC too, but I only have it to play games.

**Identity X** · 10-28-2007 05:41 PM

Originally Posted by Burzhi

Oh? Do please elaborate. If anything, Linux supports EVERY style possible, with the number of slight alternatives and differentations it provides in the way of distros.

In many respects, Linux is MUCH more user-friendly than Window.

e.g. Your system will automatically update all the software you install when available, not just the OS itself.

e.g. To download and install a program, you simply type: apt-get install program name (differs dependent on distro, but all same concept). No trying to find BS pirate copies of stuff (or wasting money on them)

e.g. Destitution of truly effective viruses (anybody who incorrectly calls them "Virii" in an failed attempt to sound clever must be flogged), thus little paranoia in comparison.

etc..

1st example: Ok.

2nd example: Only a limited subset of possible programs, and due to some vendors (*cough* Debian *cough*) being so far up their own arses that any program that has even the slightest hint of serviceable property rights is excluded from their repository, this is often very limited. For everything else, chances are a package is not available and you have to resort to compiling the source yourself, which 90% of the time lands you in dependency hell.

Also as for "finding bullshit pirate copies of stuff", I assume you mean that there are open source alternatives. True, some open source programs, such as gcc, emacs, vim (the best version of which is the Windows "Cream" version

) and compiz are at the top of their game, but most others, including almost every graphically-heavy open-source game ever made and even such favourites as GIMP, are inferior compared to their propietary counterparts.

And most "good" open source software: including emacs, vim, GIMP, LaTeX, and Firefox are multi-platform and are available on Windows anyway, or implementations thereof.

3rd example: I've never had a virus on this Windows PC of 3 years, and have never spent a penny on protecting myself from them. In fact, the only time I screwed it up was when I had a misadventure in Linux and the recovery disc had to come out...

I'm not a Windows fan boy, but I refute your defense of Linux.

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