Alyzarin

So just for the record, I've gotten lucid three times in the past four days. >.> But I haven't felt like recording them because the one from Tuesday just totally disappeared from memory, and the one from yesterday I remember basically nothing of either, but I remember all of the non-lucid bits both before and after it. I guess I might add that one in here.... But the first one, I want to say that nothing important happened. But I might just want that to be the case. ._. There's really no way to say for sure. The second one... I'm pretty certain that the only thing I did was phasing, which is of course nothing new for me. I remember experiencing it and everything, I just don't really remember the experience itself. Oh well, the one from last night very much made up for it....

Oh, and for the last few days I've been taking 400 mg of L-theanine a day, divided into two doses of 200 mg with one in the morning and one in the late afternoon or early evening, usually.

Yesterday

#1 - But why are we in a skyscraper to begin with? [Non-Lucid]

I was in some school class in a huge skyscraper in some downtown area, and there were random people I graduated from high school with, this girl who sits behind me in my speech class I'm taking this semester at college, and my parents, for some reason. There was a massive storm coming our way with tornadoes visible through the windows and everything, and I was holding my mom's hand as we were all scared. There's a flashforward and things get hazy, but I remember seeing people evacuate but thinking that it wasn't on the same day but it was the same "windy season"....

#2 - Who would build a bathroom like this!? >_< [DILD]

The details of this have gotten hazier since I didn't care to write it down at first, but there was some gigantic computer mouse whose cord stretched all the way across some city streets, and it got pulled away and I tried to chase it but lost track of it. I remember seeing my old high school friend AB's car, but then things get blurry.... This is around where I became lucid and phased but then my next memory picks again at the non-lucid point. :T I was spending the night somewhere with AB, M, and these guys J and Ma who I met through M. The next morning, I woke up and started blasting some really heavy club music and M got excited, and her boyfriend D, who's suddenly there, turns to me and says something like "We can catch up later." I then realized that I needed to go change my clothes so I went to the bathroom to do so, but there were big windows all over the door so it was very easy to see inside. Everyone was oriented in the direction of the windows, but just not looking directly into them, but of course it was making me very uncomfortable at the thought of starting to change. J was saying maybe they should turn in a different direction, but then I woke up.

Today

Last night, I took 250 mg of choline bitartrate immediately before going to bed. I'm fairly certain this had an effect, particularly on the lucid.

#1 - This would have been great to become lucid for!! [Non-Lucid]

I was playing some bizarre new PSP game the whole time, and there actually was something going on in the rest of the dream too but I pretty much missed it all because I was so focused on playing, so I don't really remember the plot anymore. What I remember about the game was that it had a setup where you had a team of playable characters that reminded me of the structure of NIS games, but it was mixed with a simulated life raising element like chao from the Sonic Adventure and Sonic Advance games, and the actual creature and level designs were sort of Pikmin-like. I really wish I could've played more of it because it seemed really interesting, but that's about all I can recall of it, and I remember walking up stairs or something maybe to see my speech professor... but no more solid details than that.

I woke up from this dream with a very strong headache. I'm fairly certain that my head was smashed into this part of the backboard of my bed and that's what caused it, because the pain slowly went away in a way that I can only relate to when you wake up with a numb arm and it slowly returns to normal, but it was my first time having that type of thing happen so I can only guess. But I really hope that that's what happened because otherwise it would mean I woke up with a severe unexplained headache. >___>

#2 - I could've told them this would happen... somehow. [Non-Lucid]

I was in a high school PE class (though I think the setting might actually have been my elementary school, sort of?) with O and people kept trying to give him balls that corresponded to different sports, but I remember equating these to video game weapons in my mind and thinking that they were doing it wrong because they didn't realize that "his growth charts are unique". Eventually he decided to play what I think was registered as either baseball or golf... but it's really just a bunch of balls bouncing around and people chasing after them with no clear goals. He makes the "winning play" I believe when at least one of the teams is "frozen" at 23 seconds left on the timer, but it switches to this weird TV view for it that only shows symbols to represent the player. He was excited that they run, but due to the odd way I saw it play out I asked him for verification that he actually was the reason they won, claiming that "they only showed the overhead", or some such nonsense. Suddenly he got all depressed at the thought because he didn't realize that he had won it, he thought he was just a part of it, so we asked some other guy and he said that that was the case. Suddenly O sank into despair, and this guy PR who I've known since elementary school tries to ask him what's wrong and cheer him up or something, but he proclaims that he may never play that sport again, and then walks out of the gym all dejected as class ends. On the way out I was trying to think of a way to explain his reaction to PR, but I couldn't really think of a good way to phrase it before I woke up.

#3 - I think it might have been inspired by Buffy? [DILD]

This was an odd driving dream, and I'm fairly certain I've had something like this happen before.... Basically, I was driving home in the snow at night, and I was stuck driving from the back seat where there was an accelerator but no breaks. As a result, I was forced to drive very slowly and frequently take my foot off the gas so that I wouldn't gain too much momentum. I have no idea why I didn't think to just climb up to the front seat, but I know that there was a car driving behind me too, so maybe I just didn't want to mess with the situation and cause any trouble. We came over this bridge in my neighborhood, and then when I turned on to my street it was suddenly daytime. Somehow I managed to go too far beyond my house though, and then this car started coming down the street in the other direction right for me, and I perceived someone else as being in the car with me at this point too, but I don't recall ever seeing anyone.... I started thinking "shit shit shit" because I couldn't stop the car or change the direction it was going in very easily, and then we ended up headbutting the other car. This is all unbelievably vivid... perhaps a mix of the supplements and the adrenaline boost? I started trying to rationalize this situation because I didn't want to have to actually be in a car crash again, and then I thought to myself "Wait, could this be a dream? This whole thing is pretty odd...." I climbed into the front seat and by then I had a feel for my state of mind and was sure of it, so I became lucid.

At this point I looked around at the street and the sky and just stared. This was one of those lucids that leaves you completely in awe from start to finish as you repeatedly tell yourself "There's no way a dream could be this real." As I looked over the neighborhood, there was no distribution of focus as in a regular dream, it was all fully rendered as a single image. It seemed exactly as if I was seeing it in waking life in every way, minus the snow. I ended up driving back down to where my house was (and I think it was using my first car which is long gone), and when I got there my house was pretty different. It was tall and thin, spanning multiple floors, whereas the real one has only one floor and is much more wide than tall. There were also large windows spanning most of the front face, and it had some kind of Greek-esque architectural design for what looked almost like a tomb on the ground floor, and it was covered in plant vines and everything. There was some large inscription at the top of this part, which was totally made out of stone, and I didn't get a good look at all of it but I do remember seeing the word "SOUL" in large print. Again, this was all extremely vivid. I wanted to go inside and check it out, as the front door was still right there where it should have been in the middle of that framework, but about that time I started feeling a headache again and woke up.

*sigh* That would've been cool to explore. That headache, too... not the real one, but this one in the lucid. It felt like the ones I get when I smoke too much or the last few times I tripped. I'm really starting to wonder if it's hippocampal in origin, and if the choline brought it out.... I guess this break from smoking will probably help in more ways than I thought, because it's going to be annoying if that headache keeps making an appearance in lucids. :/ Hopefully it was just a one-time thing though, and overall I still consider this dream very successful.

So, I decided to do another ridiculous supplement test this time. I took 80 mg of melatonin at 9 PM, and I washed it down with thin mints, for good measure. The result was interesting. First of all, my first dream of the night was lucid. That's pretty odd, especially considering the melatonin... not that I really mind. For the rest of the night I noticed that nothing overly trippy happened, except that all of the dream scenes were very, very vivid and had mostly bizarre video game themes. I was also a bit delirious whenever I woke up, which caused me to lose one or two dreams from memory before being able to write them down, so I actually had quite a few dreams this night. And I could've had even more, but I had to wake up early again, so....

#1 - I've Yet To Make This One Work >:T [DILD]

I remember being at a school and walking down a hallway somehow having control over what was playing on the intercom, and I was using it to mess with someone by blasting loud music whenever they started talking. Eventually I got to the class I was walking to and became lucid. I wasn't incredibly aware though, because I kept texting my friend N throughout it, and I can't remember what we were talking about now. At first I just stabilized a bit, and then I kept trying to summon a joint or a pipe into someone's hands so we could smoke, but it never worked. Eventually I just sat down next to one of the guys there and started cuddling with him, but soon afterward I woke up.

And yes, let it be noted that 80 mg of melatonin was not enough to stop me from waking up several times throughout the night.

#2 - Dream Fragment [Non-Lucid]

I think I was playing as a video game character, or maybe meeting one, who was super violent and was accused of attacking someone over one thousand times "outside of battle"...? Or something like that, and I believe there was a scythe involved too, but it's hard to remember exactly.... I almost lost this one, I just barely was able to grab ahold of the memory.

#3 - Bobolo [Non-Lucid]

I was trying to help my cousin K with a school paper based on some kiddie game website called Bobolo that was specifically about some kind of disease or diseases, and I was slowly realizing that this topic wasn't really going to be usable to make a very good paper, but I didn't want to point that out to her because I felt bad that her paper was due the next day. What I remember of the website I could most quickly compare to Maple Story, but I wouldn't say it was exactly like that. There was also some set of medical record scans that I was able to unlock and look at at one point, but I wasn't able to make our what any of them said.

#4 - I Would Definitely Play This Game [Non-Lucid]

I was with my cousin G, who was living at some kind of trailer house I'm unfamiliar with with his immediate family now. We were in his room and I was playing some video game with pretty strange maps. I'm fairly certain that the way I was walking around and the character I was using were based on Phantasy Star Online, but the maps had colored grid squares with area effects that were very clearly (I even remember thinking it at the time) based on geo panels from the Disgaea series. The way the character jumped also reminds me of a Mario game thinking back on it now, but not enough to say it was based on that. I was excited about something on it, but I can't remember what now, and then I logged off and talked to G about watching kids do something pointless (the conversation is pretty hazy in my memory), and then I left the house. I got in my car and started trying to figure out how to get home while blasting some really crazy dubstep song which actually sounded pretty badass, but just as I was starting to find my way the dream faded.

At this point I woke up and, after I got out of my mildly hypnotic state, my libido was running pretty strong. I rolled over and started basically molesting my body pillow for a minute, but I tried to do this passively so the energy would wear off and I could fall asleep again. Eventually I started drifting and had some light hypnagogia, I think of some text or something? I didn't make note of it, so it's hard to remember. And the same with not long after, I rolled over and had more hallucinations, I think it was some kind of ladder pattern running horizontal across my vision, or something... but then my mom came in and woke me up because I have stuff do. Ah, well. Not a bad night.

I'm just playing catch-up here a little bit. These are the dreams I have recorded from the past couple of weeks that I haven't uploaded yet.

#1 - Hmm [Non-Lucid]

I was in a bed in a dark room with A, this girl that I know through some friends that one of them has a crush on, and T, a different friend's old roommate. T wasn't very involved, I could just hear him moving around. I was giving A a full-body massage. Afterwards we all got up and walked to a classroom, which was just down the hall from the room we were in. Hmm.

#2 - Kenny Dies [DILD]

Most of this dream is blurry in my memory now, but I remember it starting with me, my old friend D, and Kenny from South Park all being chased by someone. We were going through some obstacle course connected to a mall or something and we were trying to escape from a room that was filling up with water before it was too late. At one point D and I turned around and saw Kenny floating in the water, having drowned. D looked shocked and said "Oh my god, they killed Kenny!" I jumped up and said "You bastards!!" I tried to go after him but D pulled me away, and then my memory gets hazy again.... The next thing I remember is walking outside the mall in the parking lot and becoming lucid. There was some cool pattern in the clouds, but I can't remember what it was now. I decided to walk through the mall and gathered up a crowd of DCs around me all chanting a mantra of stability with me, something like "this dream is long, vivid, and solid". While we were walking around I was also picking up various pieces of furniture in the store effortlessly with one hand and hurling them across the store. I was really worked up and this girl next to me did part of the chant wrong, so I looked over and said "No!" and shoved her headfirst into a glass wall. It didn't break, she just hit it really hard and then fell over. When I saw that it was actually someone I know and like in waking life I felt bad, and I picked her up and sat her down on a chair to see if she was alright. After that I started getting kind of unfocused and the dream ended.

#3 - Too Much Energy [DILD]

The main thing I remember about this dream is that I was pissed when I realized it wasn't real, because it was going really well. I became lucid around the time I was doing all these crazy calculated flips around this huge auditorium that were really fun and impressive as hell, and then when I realized what was going on I just had endless amounts of energy. I got really unfocused and just started grabbing stuff and throwing it all over the place until I woke up.

#4 - Back Once Again [DILD]

I was back at my old middle school with O and we were visiting our old orchestra teacher Mr. L. Afterwards we somehow got lost in the crowd and became part of the student body there, so we started trying to find our English class that we were supposed to head to next. We realized that we needed to pick our schedules first, so we started walking to the office and on the way we saw an old friend of ours wearing this cute sweater that I own that looked totally weird on him. X) We were also on the second floor of the building and I could see a tower of people stacked on top of each other coming up and leaning in our direction from the first floor visible beyond the railing. >_> Around this time I became lucid, and I ran into the girl M in the hallway who I haven't seen at least since we graduated high school but who I knew since kindergarten. I walked up to her and said "Hey, girl." She came up to me and I grabbed her and ripped her shirt down and started groping her and kissing her neck, but I got a little too into it and the dream faded away.

I took 50 mg of zinc at dinner the night that this next dream happened. I like to think that it had an effect.

#5 - More Summoning And Possession Practice [DILD]

There was some weird school stuff going on this dream before my memory really cuts in. The first thing I really recall is becoming lucid while packing up my stuff in a dark room. I wasn't immediately lucid enough to break out of this action at first, so I started repeating a mantra "electricity works in dreams" while I kept trying to turn on the lights and use my cell phone light to help me find stuff. It worked to an extent, and some of the lights showed up or got brighter if they were already on. My cat was also in the room with me but walked out it and down the school hallway at some point. I decided to walk out to the hall myself and followed it down to a large open area in a very fancy hotel-type building. There was also a large window spanning several stores to the left of us that was visible because every floor ended in a balcony. I decided to fly forward and grabbed a sofa with people sitting on it with my right hand as I passed by it, and I phased us through the window. Outside I could see groups of people eating dinner at tables below us, and I chucked the couch at one of them and then just moved on without even really watching what happened. I flew higher up to where there was a rooftop balcony with no covering and saw a family eating dinner or something. I decided that I wanted to see if I could summon a whole group of people, so I flew a ways over to the next rooftop thinking that I wanted to see a small group of gossiping women. When I got there it worked perfectly, there were four women in classy dressed gossiping about something at a table, and they didn't seem to take notice of me. I decided to possess one of them but it didn't go completely smoothly, and the other women started looking at me (as her) and asking if I was alright, I was making weird faces trying to adjust the feeling. I finally started getting situated but then my libido started ramping up and it woke me up. Man, if I could just control that feeling without waking up more often....

That's it for now!

This is from November 21st, I just didn't get around to typing it all up before.

Early in the night I originally fell asleep on the couch in the living room in front of my laptop, then I woke up a couple to a few hours later and shut down everything in the house and moved to bed. So that technically makes these with a WBTB.

#1 - Creeper Nightmare [Non-Lucid]

Throughout this dream, for some reason all of the windows in my house had open blinds and were larger than normal, making it very easy to see into the house from the outside at any point. It was really creeping me out because in the house next to mine which was visible through the windows there were these four guys that kept peering around corners or over fences to just stare at me in a really freaky way, and then they would start laughing when I got anxious. Even when I tried to go out front or out back I would see them watching me from somewhere. At one point I was even crawling around on the floor in the house and reaching strategically over and around objects to avoid being seen by them, knowing that they were just out of eyesight staring into the window. Eventually I just got pissed, and I went out front, walked over to their fence, and jumped up on it in one swift movement. This is not uncommon for me; my dream self seems to think that walking on fences is fairly normal, though still something to be considered significant. I ran along the top until the second floor balcony of the next door house (which doesn't actually exist, it's a one-story house) and leapt over to it. I went in through the door and walked up to one of the guys who said "Oh shit!" and looked shocked. I was ready to smack a ho, but then my memory of the dream gets really blurry and I just remember there being something about my old friend T, I saw him for a second... but then, I woke up. Ah, well.

#2 - Modeling Assignment [Non-Lucid]

I was at some big school function where they paired us up with different students and had us take tests and do modeling jobs and stuff. There was some girl there that I was just trying to be nice to for some reason, and I remember lending her a pencil, but then she still got totally pissed at me for something. However, AB, this girl I used to know since elementary school but barely ever talked to since then, got up and started defending my honor with some long speech. Oh, also, I think for most of this dream, or at least this part onward, I was JY, this guy I also knew since elementary school. No idea why, I haven't thought about him in ages.... Anyway, like I said, we were paired off and we were supposed to be doing a modeling gig. For ours they were expecting us to submit some comic we'd made, but my partner was the one who had it on him and he didn't show up. I tried doing the gig myself and they told me my image was nice but it needed more, it had to be both of us or neither. I decided to go walking around the mall/school looking for my partner and somehow ended up back at my house. (My real house, not JY's house.) I was in my parents' bedroom and I decided to just jump back on the bed and give the guy a phone call. I told him the situation and he said that he had to ditch to go to a dentist appointment. I just said that that was fine because the school was just pushing us into it anyway so I didn't really care that much.

#3 - Nothing Wrong With A Little Bondage [Non-Lucid]

I was at some kind of station waiting for transportation with my parents, and there were these two random girls standing not far from us. I turned to my parents and asked them if the train that just left was the one that we were supposed to be taking, and the girls startled giggling and said that it was actually a bus. I just responded that we call it a train where I come from. It was clearly based on a train from around here, so I wasn't wrong lol. Eventually a couple more arrive and we got on a different one from them and I get a third-person view (from outside and behind the train, though it may have become a bus considering what we did next) of the train swerving through traffic and over all these crazy highways that bend at impossible angles. It basically looked like a huge video game obstacle course set up all around some big city full of skyscrapers. The dream then transitions to when I'm already off the train and I'm at a mall restaurant of some kind meeting up with M, some random DC, O, ET (heh, not the extra terrestrial), S (5 hits, for self-reference), and maybe C and a few others. We were going to do something though I can't remember exactly what now, and this random guy walked up to me and kissed my hand. I just patted him on the back and said "Sorry, I'm taken." and moved on, and I saw a friend comforting him as he walked away. Then, ET just up and decides to grab me by the arms from behind, pick me up, and hold me locked in some bondage position to parade me around the mall for everyone to see. At this point many of the people in the crowd were suddenly in fetishy outfits, and everyone was just staring at me amused as we went by. And yes, it was awesome. >.> I could hear the whole gang talking about movies or something behind me, but I never got back into the conversation before the dream ended. I had a brief false awakening where I typed up most of the previous dream on my phone, almost letting it fade from memory. Luckily, I still remembered it well upon waking for real.

#4 - And Now The Creepers Can Fly ;-; [MILD]

In this dream I felt that I was visiting home for the holidays, though I'm not entirely sure where exactly I would've been visiting from. I was wandering around outside on the side of my house by the next door neighbors' fence and I saw some random girl followed by SC, this girl I knew in middle school, breaking into their yard through the fence. The girl was saying that it's just something she likes to do to mess with people so they have to take the time to clean their yards up. Now this next part I really have no memory of at all, though I really wish I did. Instead, I'll just have to quote it. "Then some old guy comes running by and uses me as an external pacemaker for a second." I go back inside my house through the garage and see the girls sitting out back and think that something must be up because they should still have been in the neighbors' yard. I approach our back door and think to myself "Alright, if I can fly right through it then this is a dream." I leapt off the ground and went right through the door and wall and flew into the sky. I was excited, but immediately after the happiness set in and I turned around slightly and saw some creepy guy flying right behind me. I had an adrenaline rush and the scene transitioned into my bedroom, and I was convinced that I'd ruined my shot. I almost lost this dream to a false awakening as well, but thankfully I woke up shortly afterward.

#1 - Maybe Some Post-Apocalyptic Future? [Non-Lucid]

The first memories of this dream are very patchy. What I remember is that there were lots of these robots that looked like they were designed to be piloted by people for combat. They had the typical dwarfish body with a big round cockpit head design. However, when you actually got inside, through an opening in the top, there was a huge lair inside each one. Some of this dream took place in first person and some in third person, but apparently I was this girl who was just a little bit creepy-looking and sort of lanky, and my face was divided in half with colors so that (I believe) the left side of my face was my normal skin and hair color and the right had pale white skin and light navy blue hair. My hair was also much straighter than it actually is. Though I don't quite remember the experience (though I suppose this whole dream could pretty much count), I also recall taking like eight hits of LSD and almost snorting a line of MDMA, but then I got distracted. The clearest part of my memory comes in when I'm walking around an apartment complex looking for this huge drill vehicle I guess one of my friends was supposed to be at, and when I finally found it I started talking to them (I want to say it was a girl). They were shocked because I had aged more than them, and I explained that it was because I spent so much time in a combat robot lair and time moves faster in there. I think there was a little bit more to that, but... that's about where the vividness fades out, and I wake up.

#2 - Dream Fragment [Non-Lucid]

Something about having a big dinner with my parents and Linkzelda or something like that, I remember seeing them both separately but not really any other details.

#3 - Dream Fragment [Non-Lucid]

My friend N (who is not on DV) and I were arguing against some posts on DV, and all I remember is that the subject was blue and white suits, either for skydiving or skiing, and a claim that you have to do ridiculous things just to be noticed in this world.

#4 - Dream Fragment [Non-Lucid]

Just a direct quote from my notes for this one, it's hard to really remember it now. "Talking to Auron about how DV doesn't cater enough to people who want to improve their bodies through 3D models? Or something like that...." >.>

#5 - Creepy Thoughts [Non-Lucid]

I was visiting S in a house he was renting the top floor of, and I believe he was renting it with a roommate. The house was gigantic and I didn't even really get to see most of it, but I did end up sleeping over either on a cot or in a sleeping bag or something in a room I had to myself. There was a window in the room with a clear view of another house across the street, though with where I felt I was in the house and the size of the house I'm not entirely sure this view made much sense. Regardless, I could see the other house's balcony, and that got me thinking about the fact that if someone was out there I'd be able to see them clearly and they wouldn't notice me at all, and that just made me think about how often people must just people watch us for various reasons that we never even realize. And that's about where the dream ended.

#6 - Fight In The Gym [Non-Lucid]

I was with this guy I used to hang out with, JB, and we were at a school function or something with lots of other people. I want to say we were in a gym with a stage on it, and we were pretty close to the stage at first. Out of nowhere these two guys sort of near us started fighting, and along with the rest of the crowd we got pushed into one of the back corners of the room, and most of us sat down. I was literally there in the corner myself, everyone was packed in pretty tight and there was a guy in front of me and a girl to my right that were wedging me in there. I actually felt completely trapped because they were pushing tight but there was no discomfort of any sort, so it felt really nice. >w< Someone tries to take a couple good pictures of the group after those guys randomly stopped fighting and then ML, this girl I knew in high school, is saying something when her mouth starts growing gigantic and rotating sideways. >_> My memory starts getting a little hazy at this point, and then I wake up.

Nosy Teacher [Non-Lucid]

I was in a high school class with people who I don't really remember now, they might have been imaginary. The teacher was standing right outside the door not really paying attention to the class, I guess we were just waiting for it to end or something? And I was seated on the floor around a few people and we were trying to smoke a bowl of weed without getting caught. The teacher came in and almost caught us but I managed to hide everything from her at the last second and we got away with it. When she went back out I sat in the chair at her desk and started going again, but then she came back in and we decided to call it quits. One of those times, I want to say maybe the second time but I'm not sure, I had to hold in a hit while she was talking to us to let all the smoke disappear. When we finished we moved to a different spot on the floor and my old friend D was there, and apparently I was dating him. I snuggled up next to him and started watching this tiny TV placed up on the ceiling in the opposite corner of the room. I remember him getting my attention and saying something to me about how his parents can't believe I still listen to this old radio station we used to listen to a lot (not that there's anything wrong with it ), but I don't think I got a response in before I woke up.

Patchy Memories [Non-Lucid]

Just a couple short clips in this one.... I was in this gigantic house which seemed vaguely based on mine, though I'm pretty sure it was just some huge building, maybe a school, before that.... I was in the living room and there was a huge opening in the roof (made as if it actually belonged there) starting in the opposite corner of the room to me and taking up most of the ceiling. I was fairly concerned with this as it was raining and all this stuff was getting rained on, especially the HD TV. Here my memory blanks out for a bit and skips forward. I'm in a high school classroom or something with... something, an egg maybe? But what was born from it? A bid? A kitten? (Yes, a kitten. Potentially, anyway.) I want to say that that's right but it's really hard to say now.... The last thing I clearly remember about the dream is that Wolfwood was there in the class with me working on some computer and I tried to talk to him after class got out and everyone got up to leave but he just ignored me the whole time.

Just to catch up on a few dreams I missed recording recently....

October 31

Fragment - "Weed smoking at some school with creepy guy who wants cheese pizza, blue teddy bears on the highway? The rest of us eat pepperoni." All I remember about this dream is seeing those blue teddy bears, they looked very trippy and weird. >.>

The Sacred Stream [Non-Lucid]

I was with M and at least one or two other people (who I think was/were imaginary) and after driving in my car a bit and then getting out to walk around we fell way down over the side of this huge cliff. We landed on a rock formation around half way down that had a stream flowing down it and started drinking it, and I believe M who noticed that it was, in fact, alcohol. o.o I took some large handfuls myself and it was freaking delicious! Unfortunately, when we climbed down from it to the ground there was some "tribe" of people there talking about how they were pissed at us from drinking from their sacred river, and then they started shooting at us. (I can't remember if it was just guns or poison darts or what, it's been too long now.) My first car just happened to be parked nearby so we all ran to it and hopped in and I started driving us away, though for a second I got really distracted by the fact that the headlights wouldn't work (), but then they finally did (). We pull off to the road and finally get away, but then I start feeling odd so I pull off to the side and look at my cellphone. Everything on the screen is fluctuating wildly, letters, shapes, and colors start switching around and pulsing and I realize that I'm hallucinating really hard. (In actually, technology usually malfunctions like this for me in dreams. ) I felt like I'd ingested something toxic and M was trying to look after me while I felt colder and weaker, but shortly thereafter I woke up.

November 1

Incredibly Fragmented Lucid [DILD]

"Stabilizing in a house...."

How disappointing is that. ._.

November 3

Pitted Against One Another [Non-Lucid]

I was part of some futuristic battle where people all fighting for their own personal causes were pitted against each other even though they had no hard feelings against each other, and I ended up fighting this one guy in a mall who was trying to set himself free of the hurt that he had because, apparently, he had taught every single person who died on a plane on 9/11 to read and speak English and he hadn't gotten over their deaths. o.o When I had to unfortunately defeat him, he, like, dissolved into blue code while telling me this story....

I really wish I remembered more of that dream, but I didn't even write anything down when I woke up so that's pretty much all I've got now.

I had a good number of dreams last night but I only wrote this one down.... I need to stop being lazy. But, at least this one was sort of fun.

Drawing As A Means Of Summoning? [DILD]

I don't remember the dream up to the part where I became lucid or even a little bit after it, just that it was at a school. I walked down some hallway to a door that should've led to a classroom, but instead it opened up to the stage of some TV game show with a full audience and everything. I was kind of nervous that walking through this door alone would make the dream unstable, so I went to grab a DC to take with me. I walked back out of the hall and found M and grabbed her hand and got her to follow me back. As I was running down the hall with M behind me I thought to myself something along the lines of "She better still be M when I turn around and see her again." and when we got to the door I checked and she was, but upon going through the door I noticed that it just led to a regular classroom now. I guess she wasn't what I should have been worried about changing. I got kind of mad and decided to take my feelings out on the unsuspecting room full of DCs, so I walked up to the chalkboard and drew a cat, like a really basic cat like you would expect a child to draw. I then wrote next to it "ATTACK!" and underlined it twice, and stepped back from the board. The cat's eyes suddenly went from normal circles to an angry expression, and then it crouched back and leapt off of the board, in slow motion, over on to one of the desks a DC was sitting at. Unfortunately, it was still slow and weak-willed, and the DC just kind of brushed it off. ._. I guess I should probably plan that out a little better next time, maybe draw a tiger or something instead. At that point I noticed that the dream was starting to become unstable as the environment seemed to be breaking into strange red runes that would flash all over the place chaotically, so I just started moving around grabbing things and DCs trying to regain some sensory input and re-stabilize things. It did increase the vividness somewhat, it saved the dream temporarily, but this part also gets kind of fuzzy. I also remember (and I THINK this was after the cat stuff, but I'm not 100% sure...) getting really horny and feeling the urge to masturbate, and I almost started but then I realized that that would be a totally pointless use of a lucid dream and it would probably wake me up. I also groped some girl with gigantic breasts for the fun of it at one point, I think it was right after that lol. Shortly after that (or the other thing if that happened before it, but I'm pretty sure that was last), I woke up.

This dream definitely made me consider some new aspects of summoning, like I put in the title. I wonder what else I could bring to life like that....

#1 - When Did We Become A Resort? [Non-Lucid]

I don't recall too much about this dream, but I do remember that I was with my family staying at some sort of resort, except the setting was actually just our house. There was some woman in a fancy (and shiny, if memory serves) dress doing inspections around the house/resort, so I had to make sure to hide all of the drug-related stuff in my room before she got there so I wouldn't get in trouble. There had been a lot of drug nonsense going on earlier in the parts of the dream I can't really remember, but I do remember a flash of flying a magic carpet through skyscrapers in a downtown area on LSD. Anyway, the lady showed up and did her inspection, and all that really comes back about it was that I had the slightest desire to try to steal the woman's body from her. There was also some comment about how people kept trying to give us these rectangular cheesecake slices for free, claiming that they were "flannel cake", because it was his birthday. After that, I woke up.

#2 - My Demon Pals [Non-Lucid]

I was walking around my old high school/a wedding that a bunch of people I knew from school were at. Walking around with me were two demon spirits: a skinny, normal-looking guy except for the fact that his face (and especially eyes) just gave off that feeling of evil, and a big, buff guy wearing a fedora and with a cannon for an (at least one) arm. Cannon guy was causing mayhem by shooting cannonballs everywhere, and I was just laughing. There may have been some of my normal friends with me too, but it's hard to remember now. I saw this girl I've known since really early in school, KR, running by me in a wedding dress holding a leash and a long wire for some reason, and I took the wire from her and kept running alongside her. A bunch of other people from the school started running with us and I had the feeling that we were racing each other to this one special location we were all headed towards, just to be like we were carefree kids again like in school. That was fun. However, that image was becoming fainter as it went on, and then I woke up into sleep paralysis. My entire room felt like it was encompassed with a powerful energy, things were constantly pulsing and waving, and my vision was somewhat blurry and distorted, and a bit doubled. There was also a loud white noise that sounded like some kind of demonic language, and occasionally words could be pulled out of it but they didn't have any meaning. I was lying on my back so it was hard to look too far down, but I saw the same skinny demon spirit from the dream standing at the end of my bed, staring at me with those evil eyes. Hey there, specter. I reached out a fantasy arm to him (as my real one was still quite paralyzed), and I felt my imaginary limb twist and bend along with the rest of the energy in the room. The demon just stared at me longer and I tried to give him an "Aw, come on." type of face, but then it all faded away and I was just lying in bed normally. Too bad, I would've liked to see where that could've gone. >w<

Supplement Dose: 3.6 mg Hypericin (1200 mg St. John's Wort extract), 3 York Peppermint Patties

Blahhhh.... So, the beginning of this night was rather unpleasant. Perhaps hastily, I ingested four St. John's wort capsules which were standardized to contain 0.9 mg of hypericin per 300 mg of extracted plant matter, as I've experimented with St. John's wort before and had very trippy dreams from it (though the active I'm more interested in is hyperforin, got some of that on it's way too ). However, four is a rather large dose, and though I was mainly aiming for the NMDA antagonist effects of the hypericin, I suppose I could've taken into account the other possible actives in the extract.... I had a good bit of insomnia and stomach pains (which the peppermint patties may have contributed to), and after a few hours of sleep with no solid dreams I had to get up and use the bathroom, which was... not fun at all. I was certainly feeling the effects of the hypericin as well, as when I woke up I was slightly dissociated. All of my senses were more euphoric than normal, but also more dulled or distant (this may be hard to comprehend correctly if you don't have experience with dissociatives). It felt nice at first, but didn't do much for me overall. It also stood in the way of my progress to help force myself to fall asleep again, with a little (perhaps menthol-assisted) help from my body's natural processes. I got started but the sensations weren't strong enough to keep me going, and I was slightly anesthetized so I wasn't able to get anywhere with it. *sigh*

Eventually, I did fall asleep, and I started the night out with a strange fragment, followed by a fairly surreal dream with a slight hint of mint, so that's nice at least. I wanted to stay asleep for longer and try to suck more out of the dose, but my physiology wasn't putting up with it after I woke up from the last one, so I just decided to get up.

Man, I would love to be able to get some hypericin by itself and not have to go through that again! But, what're you going to do? Oh well, here's my dreams for the night.

Dream Fragment - I was doing cocaine in the back of a high school class that had a substitute teacher with my old friend SN with help from PR, this guy I knew since elementary school. ("With help from"...? Not exactly sure what that implies now, but it's in the notes.) Afterwards I was disposing of the evidence (notes: "favorite tin") and dropped my phone in the trash by mistake, and then people kept throwing more trash in on top of it before I could get it out. D:

An Unfocused Night [Non-Lucid]

There was a lot going on in this dream, and I'm pretty sure I was with O for a lot of it at the beginning, but my first clear memory comes in at the top of a tall building in Las Vegas in some kind of suite with some of my family members and my dad's friend Px (I think?). Mainly what I remember is that we were smoking weed, and I had brought my own but they wanted to smoke theirs first, and I was telling them about how O and I had just come here to Vegas twice in the last three days just to relax and to take some extensive English course that was over in literally two days to get those college credits out of the way. I believe my cousin P then came up to me and started showing me some new Mario game that I had thought was just a port of Super Mario 64, but it turned out to be a legitimate remake with new graphics and features and all of this stuff, and it was on the Nintendo DS. The game zoomed in to take up my entire perception, and I could see now that it actually took place at a modified version of my old middle school. Of course, that didn't strike me as too odd at the time.

Mario was basically just running around and doing wall jumps all over the place, and somewhere down the line (I saw a lot of the game but don't remember much of it now) the narrating voice changed from my cousin P to my other cousin (P's younger sister) K. I told her that she should go wall jump way up to the top of some tower which I was apparently aware of from the original game, even though there was no such structure in it. She gets up there and... it's kind of a weird area where you can see windows and a church bell or something outside and it was sunny outside, and where we were was waaaay high up above the ground on a floating platform, and around the rim of the room (with just a little space extending outward from the walls) there were lots of newborn babies in the kinds of cribs they get right when they're first born, at the hospital. Suddenly K and I were actually here in the room with them, and as the panel was small and she was the one who knew what she was doing, I was standing behind her and holding on to her waist as not to fall off. This is where the mentholy libido feeling kicked in, not because of my cousin (thankfully ) but because I was suddenly aware that I was wearing a sexy nurse outfit, and I was struck with that sort of "pure" feeling that's been discussed in the experiment thread and I just wanted to mother all of the babies in the room and make sure they were all happy. >w<

I'm wondering if the feeling may have caused the dream to become less stable (since in all of my other menthol dreams it actually woke me up), because things unfocused for a minute and then kind of refocused at my house, in my parents' bedroom. I was apparently playing the game on the DS alone now, and some guy who I don't recognize came into the room. I told him briefly about the game and then asked him if there was anyone else (who?) left in the house, and he said no. We also had these sugary colored dough ball things that I perceived as being Japanese candies at the time, and they were delicious! We were eating them to just kind of pass the time and break the tension since we didn't really know each other, and he was watching something on my parents' TV (a sports game maybe?), and I asked him if he wanted to go out somewhere and get some real food, my treat. He said yes but in a way that made it seem like he thought I was joking, which I recognized at the time but I still went to change into a bit more formal-casual clothes. I went back into the room and said something like "Alright, let's go!" and he looked at me a bit surprised, trying to back out of it then but I told him he already said yes. He just seemed embarrased because he didn't expect me to actually pay for him, or something like that. I asked him where he wanted to go, and after much debating I believe he settled on "anywhere with cucumbers". We walked out into the kitchen briefly so he could grab his stuff, and while we were out there I saw a teenage mutant ninja turtle walking around. I don't know which one is who, but it was the one with the blue headband. We headed out the front door and I noticed that it was nighttime and the neighborhood was fairly covered in snow, which looked really nice. I ended up trying to lock the door with the wrong key first, but then I switched the right one. The guy started walking out towards my car, but then I woke up.

Dream Fragment - "SA, M maybe?, and someone else... reminiscing."

Dream Fragment - "Humanoid ants made of shit taking over the classroom, Mrs. K and R (from that class) and such."

Supplement Dose: 36.4 mg Menthol (Cough Drops)

#1 - The Lust Returns [DILD]

There was something going on in the beginning of the dream that I can't quite remember, but we were in a huge auditorium with multiple floors of seatings, and I was up on the second floor (which was kind of like a balcony overlooking the stage). There was a massive amount of people there, which is perhaps notable because I'm usually not in crowds this big unless I've taken some kind of dream enhancer. All I really remember about this part of the dream was that we had some kind of instructors or someone who was watching after us, I'm pretty sure my old friend S was there, and someone had pissed me off and subsequently was moved closer to the edge of the balcony, further away from me. Somehow, I think when I was turning to face the crowd behind me, the scene turned into a classroom. I almost want to say there was some strange 2D video game screen that flashed in between this, but my recollection of it is very hazy.... Anyway, once I was in the classroom I pretty much immediately became lucid. I looked at the screen which was pulled down and had the projector turned on, and there were very readable words on it but it was entirely gibberish, and I didn't really make an effort to remember any of it, though it was funny. I surveyed the class and noticed that everything was in extremely high detail, and the dream hadn't required any stabilization at all. That's nifty, usually things are falling apart for me by now. A bunch of the kids in the class had drinks, so I decided to do a taste test. I tried three different drinks, all of which were delicious. I want to say that one of them looked vaguely orange juice-like, and I think at least one or both of the others was/were soda. I return to the front of the classroom and say "Someone go get me lunch!", deciding that I wanted to try some food now too. This girl in the back of the class stands up and cheerily says "I'll do it! " Awww, she's cute. >w< I say that I'm going to hug her first on her way out and I basically jump up and wrap myself around her. So warm and soft. Suddenly my libido starts shooting up HARD. Oh no, this again! It was much stronger than last night too, so maybe it is a normal menthol effect for me.... The feeling just keeps rising and I'm not sure how much longer I can take it, I'm honestly afraid that I'm just about to explode. I squeeze the girl tighter... and then the dream fades, and I wake up. Intense. X)

Dream Fragment - Apparently I said something on DV about how not everyone wants to be rich, and tommo was doubting if it was true.

These are just a few old dreams that I haven't taken the time to log yet, figured I should get them out of the way. The first two happened on the same night, but the third one was a different time. Unfortunately I don't remember them very much, but it is what it is. :T

#1 - Drugs Are Bad, Mkay [Non-Lucid]

O and I were in class, and apparently the class was about how bad weed is for you.... We ended up staying after class and smoking weed. But what I do remember is that the teacher was so adamant about how terrible drugs are and so on and so forth, and then out of nowhere she suddenly started acting all fiendish and talking about how she needed her OxyContin to get through the day or she'd go insane, and she yanked the pill bottle out of her drawer and popped one. At the time I thought it was so funny that I started laughing like Shion except happy. I honestly couldn't stop, I had to grab on to nearby objects for support because it was knocking the wind out of me. Later on the dream gets a little hazier and less structured, what I wrote down was "something about a hotdog, a boyfriend, and a gay manager or producer or something?" Hmmm....

#2 - Some Kind Of War [DILD]

This one I really don't remember at all, which kind of sucks because it sounds really interesting. This is what I have written up on my phone: "Shopping district bomb supposed to go off but doesn't, the country backed out of some political thing, families are fleeing and I'm with O and others. Lots of active DCs like PZ but can't remember much now, stealing A's (self-hint: old) car (supposedly) that we found abandoned, with some pretty metallic orange heels for me to put on right next to it. ^_^ The dream fading away in the car made me lucid and I tried to save it, but it was too late."

False Awakening - "Transitioned to a false awakening where I wrote the whole thing down in a notepad."

#3 - The Weed Restaurant [Non-Lucid]

I was in Las Vegas at a casino with O, and we were going to some in-casino restaurant where all of the food was made from weed. SD (game shop) was out front somewhere, and PR was sitting at the table with us. When I sat down I accidentally moved the table, which was on wheels, and a girl who was sitting there also spilled her water and got mad at me. Afterwards O showed up again and started telling me how he broke his leg or something making a really stupid decision. If I remember correctly, he tied his leg up with an American flag so that it was always being held back in the air, and then with his one remaining leg he leaped off of a cabinet or desk on to the ground, and his leg gave out and he slammed into something, injuring the other one. ._. Though he looked perfectly fine at the time, and was walking with both legs. In the meantime, he was totally chowing down on all of the food. We had water and fries and cheese sticks so far I think, all with weed in them. I wanted to order some mini-churros, but I never got to try them. >w< Also, I'm pretty sure that the cheese sticks were just like the basic thing they bring out and refill over and over whenever you run out, like chips at a Mexican restaurant or bread at most Italian places... which is pretty awesome. Basically, my last thought before waking up while listening to O's story and watching him stuff his face was "Oh god, we're going to be so fucking high."

#1 - Chair Fight [Non-Lucid]

I was with AB, an old friend from high school, and some random girl. I think she said something about her named being Andon... hard to remember now. All I really remember was that it was the girl I was just meeting for the first time, but AB was the one who acted like he didn't really know us, and we were in some kind of high school classroom and we got into a fight with random objects. I was holding a chair up to defend against attacks and AB pulled out his wallet and threw his credit card at me, and it bounced off the chair and then flew straight (and slowly) into the ceiling where it got stuck, and then I proceeded to laugh my ass off at the absurdity until I woke up.

#2 - Just Another Family Party [Non-Lucid]

There was some kind of family party going on, and I was on the deck out back. I was actually swinging around the roof on some kind of rope or wire for part of it, too. A family friend, ME, was doing coke on the back table (which was awesome to witness ) and my uncle and I were laughing at my cat, who was actually speaking English with this funny high pitched voice... but just saying random gibberish, kind of like a parrot but even less developed, just repeating word salad phrases rather than structured sentences. I woke up laughing from this one, too.