Alyzarin

These are all of the lucids I've had since I went on vacation. It's good but I really need to get back on track with journaling, all of these have been high vividness but vanish so easily when I wake up. My ability to enjoy a lucid is high, but my recall is terrible. I definitely need to fix this....

But in the meantime, dreams! It's been a while since I had some of these, so my apologies if my memory is a little shaky on them.

May 21

Right before my eyes!! [DILD]

The first thing I remember is hanging around my neighborhood. I was hanging out with a couple old friends, I believe a couple who I went to elementary school with, and we were staring at where the elementary school used to be and reminiscing. It had been replaced with a college campus, though in reality it still stands there. I became lucid when I separated from them, and I headed down the alleyway that leads to my house. The main thing I recall about the beginning of this lucid was that there were a bunch of DCs chasing me like screaming fangirls. They were all cute, somewhat chubby white girls. I was fighting one of them off near my garage and I decided that I needed some kind of weapon. I held out my hand as if I was holding something and just stared at it and visualized a wrench being there, and it faded into existence right before me! It wasn't really that useful to me though, I'm not exactly sure why I went with a wrench, so I just tossed it at her and ran back out into the open. On my way out I also tried to split my body in two and summon fire but I wasn't able to do either. I was also able to reach up to my face and remove a pair of glasses, twice without putting any back on, that increased the vividness of the scene each time.

When I got out of the alleyway I was still being chased by the girl, she tried to jump me and I ended up accidentally groping her, but then I got away and she seemed to disappear. I turned down one of my neighborhood streets and saw this girl who looked like ML, that I knew all throughout public school also since elementary, but she looked almost like a porn star. Also, I have no earthly idea what this means, but in my phone notes at the end of that last part I added "and apparently it was an ongoing procedural thing." I believe I picked her up as I walked by her and started inviting her to my house, but then the dream faded away.

May 22

Good thing we're not.... [DILD]

I don't remember too much about this one. TB, a guy from elementary school, and some other guy were there, and at one point I was walking with this girl MH who people used to think we were related back in like first or second grade. I was thinking about making out with her, but then I realized that this all was odd and became lucid, but then I woke up.

May 24

Hammerspace trial. [DILD]

I was back in high school talking to M's friend C at the end of a class and the beginning of break, then I left to find someone else though I forget who now. All I know is that I was done with classes at that point. I became lucid while walking into a classroom and took off my backpack and randomly decided to just drop it through the floor so I could store it for later. When it actually worked and the floor swallowed it up, I got kind of distracted and decided to toy around with it a little more. I stuck my hand into the floor and tried reaching around for the bag but couldn't find it anywhere, so I pulled myself back out and tried to summon it directly into my hand like the wrench from before but I couldn't get that to work either, and since I focused so much on it the rest of the dream faded away.

June 4

#1 - Acid carnival? [DILD]

I was lucid outside at night at some kind of bizarre carnival. This whole section of the dream had a very strange psychotic feel to it. I was bursting with energy and the random chains of events happening around me were unfolding in a way that made me feel like I was in an acid trip. Everywhere I looked I had to fight off a good deal of sexual temptation to avoid getting too swept up into the dream and losing track of the lucid. The main ones I remember now are the barber shop girls and the girls getting their hair cut there, and then some beautiful performing girls including LK from middle and high school who wer just singing and dancing. There were also some weird guys here and there, and I specifically remembering sticking out my hand at one of them and yelling "Bang!" Other than that it's really hard to remember what all happened in this dream, it was very frantic and there was a lot going on.

#2 - Maybe I'll just wait.... [DILD]

This is an interesting dream to me because I'm pretty sure I accidentally incubated it while falling asleep due to what I was considering doing. I'm fairly certain the dream just kicked in with me lucid while walking down a hallway with the intention of masturbating. I seem to be in some kind of school or something and I come upon the bathroom so I head inside and notice that it's massive and there's a huge line of girls waiting inside, and even a few guys. I just decided to fuck the system and walk past the line all the way down to the end. I look in the stall and I try to throw this one girl out but she won't budge. She says something about seeing a "nasty phallus" or something like that, and then immediately holds up this suitcase with three fake but realistic and damaged-looking penises just sitting in it to show me. They looked like they were diseased and rotting or something, and it really grossed me out and I woke up.

June 6

Sort of like being drunk in an out-of-body experience. How can you beat that? [DILD]

The first of this lucid is hard for me to recall now which is annoying because I know it was cool, but mainly what I remember is starting out in some high up apartment building out in the hills somewhere and flying out and above a city scape for a while. I also saw this old abandoned building on the ground I was approaching at one point so I did a twirl in the air with the expectation that it would be inhabited when I turned all the way around and saw it again, and it was successful. When I got there I just flew around a bit and through walls to see what all there was to do, and I came upon this very attractive girl, just a little bit younger than me by the looks of it. I picked her up and just carried her in my arms with me for a little bit and got distracted talking to another DC or something. I can't remember what was said now, mainly because of what happened next. I focused back on her again and looked down at her body and noticed that she was completely naked. That combined with the fact that I was only somewhat lucid and already pretty horny, and my prefrontal cortex must have taken a big hit. I don't remember much about the next part other than basically becoming an animal. Seriously, I could get addicted to this. >.>

The bummer though was one part when I looked up from my partner and noticed that we were being swallowed into some sort of pit of darkness that was taking the stability of the dream along with it. At the last second I realized that I hadn't been able to keep focus, but there was no time to try to save it before my awareness vanished. The dream became a third-person, non-lucid scene of a woman who was escaping some thugs or something by jumping out of a window of the apartment building from before and realizing she could fly too, and I saw us flying next to each other while I told her that we were in an astral projection together. Then, I suddenly had a false awakening in that same building. I got up and noticed that my parents were talking right outside my room, and figured that that was probably what woke me up. But after that I actually did wake up.

Flying Over a Mountain Range [DILD]

The setting in this dream was odd, I was at home but I was also in some kind of school class working on a project. There was a decent chunk of this dream that was non-lucid, but I can't really remember much of it now. Basically where my recall comes in is when I became lucid and decided to go for a change of scenery.

I had decided to try walking through some doors instead of phasing for once, but then I remembered a thing I read where it said that walking through a door is enough to disrupt short-term memory and decided against it. I phased out through the backyard door of my house and flew over the fence and across other peoples' yards. The main thing I remember is that in this yard immediately behind mine, which looked nothing like it does in real life, there was a naked woman sunbathing that just caught me by surprise so I thought it was funny.

Next thing I knew the area around my house had completely changed, and I was flying high over a bunch of fields and a mountain range. It was extremely vivid and lifelike, I think it may have been the most realistic flying scene I've ever had in a lucid. I was just in awe of all of it, especially the trees, some of which were hanging in the air. They actually had very similar designs to these plants we have hanging from our living room ceiling, so I'm betting that that's what inspired them, but they were much larger, more complex, and very beautiful and natural-looking. The whole view was just incredible.

Anyway... I started thinking the name S, which I've known lots of people named, and landed somewhere in a field by this compact trailer home. I looked around and saw this girl who was one of the people with that name, this girl SS I knew from acting classes in middle school, and ran up to her and said hi. She pointed out this tornado to me that was in the distance, and either she told me or I just suddenly knew that she was training to be a wind witch and I told her to try to change its path. She wasn't really able to though, but it did pass right by us in a very unrealistic fashion without even creating any feeling of gust, it's more like it just phased out of existence by getting closer to me in my vision.

After that SS and I just sat down and I wrapped my legs around her, but then I woke up.

#1 - Missed Opportunity!! [DILD]

I was in a warehouse setting where I was doing something that I feel like I would have wanted to remember, but I can't recall it very well. This is most likely because it was my first dream of the night and I fell asleep high because I had smoked to get rid of a good deal of stomach pain. I vaguely remember a couple quick, nondescript but tauntingly awesome looking flashes of it and then I went though this big opening to be standing outside of a small building waaay up high on a cliff. It basically looked, from my perspective, like it was a cliff looking down into the Grand Canyon, it was so far away. I could also see a bustling city in the center of it in the distance, and I decided that it would be really cool if I got to the city by doing a running jump and roll off over the cliff and just bounce all the way down there. I wanted to get a good shot so I climbed up to the top of the building I was next to (somehow...) so I would have more running space, but as soon as I turned back around to get the view again the whole scenery had changed to just be a city around me. Damn it!!

I was sad but then I heard a mysterious evil voice saying that they had kidnapped someone and hid them on a tall rooftop, so I scanned the area and found them. I flew over to the roof and this guy was just stuck up there and he was grateful to be saved but seemed really unstable. He was really paranoid about being touched and backed away from me when I tried to approach him, and then things got really psychedelic before my eyes. He was rapidly transforming into different humanoid shapes, the only one I can really remember being a LEGO body, but I knew that it was just because the dream was falling apart.

#2 - Star Wars Restaurant [DILD]

I was with some girl at a Star Wars themed restaurant, and there was a dream leading up to it I'm pretty certain, but I can't really remember how we got there. I became lucid as I was just looking at her, but then shortly after that I woke up.

Not the most exciting thing, but still a lucid.

#3 - One Gathering After Another [DILD]

I was hanging out in this big building in some room that was supposed to be like a chatroom except in person, and it was for DV users. Unfortunately I don't really remember anything that happened in this room , but afterwards I met up with my friend M and went with her to a party downstairs. There were lots of people I knew there, including this guy GL that I hugged, and when I was there I started becoming lucid. I noticed that there were far too many things in my pockets to be comfortable, like significantly more than they could actually hold since they're pretty small, so I decide to go find somewhere I could safely put them down. As I was leaving I saw this girl S and her girlfriend P who I had just met recently at a meeting of BDSM people around here. Somehow I decided that they must be good lucid dreamers, so I had them come with me.

We all three walked out of the room and then flew up and phased through the ceiling up to the next floor. I was taking us back to the chatroom, but we had to walk through this fancy party (almost like a ball with royal dresses) to get there and we lost S along the way. I got to the room and noticed that there were lots of people I knew from growing up there now like this girl AH I met in kindergarten instead of people from that forum. I wasn't phased and just started emptying my pockets there, but in the meantime my lips began to swell and were feeling very bizarre. I tried to distract myself from the sensation but it was very solid. I turned around and P told me that we needed to grab S before we went back to the party, but we would have to find her first because she had shapeshifted into a girl in a fancy dress in that room. I see this short girl in black and suddenly know that it's her, so I just walk up to her and grab her around the waist and say come on and she gives in.

I think this dream could have gone on longer, but the lips thing was becoming worse and worse and I started trying to move my tongue around to see if I could get my real body to do it and see if I was lying on my face in an uncomfortable way or something, but I couldn't tell so I just said to hell with it, time to wake up. I opened my eyes seconds later and, of course, there was nothing wrong.

#4 - Time Flowing Backwards [Non-Lucid]

I got up in the morning and I was using my cannabidiol oil, and the first thing I noticed was the clock in my room. The second hand was moving backwards, and I became slightly concerned about it. Not enough to really spring into action, though. I went into the bathroom to start putting the drops on my tongue, and saw that the clock in there was still moving normally. I was suspicious of it though, and didn't think of it as enough evidence to convince me that time wasn't flowing backwards.

#5 - Depth? Who Needs It? [DILD]

I was in a class in what appeared to be something like high school, but I was communicating with someone I only met this semester in college, this girl in my humanities class named C who sits two seats to the right of me. She wasn't actually in the class though, while this guy SJ from high school was, I was just talking to her remotely. Depending on when it was in the dream I was either typing an email or instant message to her or something or I was writing on a piece of paper that magically functioned like that and filled in messages whenever we wrote them. She was talking about mushrooms and I told her they were really cool. She said she secretly wanted to try them but she was afraid of getting into it all, and she used this metaphor where she said for example that a reason that she wouldn't want to use amphetamine is because it speeds you up and she wants to experience her thoughts at the natural pace, she doesn't want any of her life to race by and when it came to mushrooms she felt the same way about her creativity.

Around this time Rob Huebel and Rob Riggle walked into the room and I perceived them as cops based on their comedy routine that they showed in Super High Me. At that time I suddenly noticed that I had a bong in my hands and was hiding it under the table, and they never saw it though it should have been really obvious. I became a bit nervous and sort of forgot about my communication with C, but then I started to become lucid. I got up and hurled the bong at the wall and watched it shatter, and in the process I accidentally knocked my cellphone forward off of the table. I stretched out over it and tried to reach down and back to reach it but it was too far away, but then I got an idea. I did that trick like where a cartoon character will act like the moon actually is really tiny and right there in the sky and they'll just put their fingers right around it in their point of view and grab it, and it worked perfectly. My phone was a little bit smaller than normal but I still had it in my hand, so I put it in my pocket and started walking off.

I could tell that the dream was starting to fade away, and I saw this large girl in blue scrubs around my age who reminds me of someone I've seen before at school leaving the classroom. I jumped up on to her and just hugged and squeezed her, but as she started taking us out of the room things were getting very dark and all I could really still do was hear people talking in the halls. I started making out with her and could feel it a bit and I had hoped that this might revive the dream, but no luck.

When I woke up I really wanted to go back to bed and try to keep this crazy ride going, but I had a friend who crashed here overnight and I didn't want to be rude by just staying passed out all morning, so maybe next time!

I'm just playing catch-up here a little bit. These are the dreams I have recorded from the past couple of weeks that I haven't uploaded yet.

#1 - Hmm [Non-Lucid]

I was in a bed in a dark room with A, this girl that I know through some friends that one of them has a crush on, and T, a different friend's old roommate. T wasn't very involved, I could just hear him moving around. I was giving A a full-body massage. Afterwards we all got up and walked to a classroom, which was just down the hall from the room we were in. Hmm.

#2 - Kenny Dies [DILD]

Most of this dream is blurry in my memory now, but I remember it starting with me, my old friend D, and Kenny from South Park all being chased by someone. We were going through some obstacle course connected to a mall or something and we were trying to escape from a room that was filling up with water before it was too late. At one point D and I turned around and saw Kenny floating in the water, having drowned. D looked shocked and said "Oh my god, they killed Kenny!" I jumped up and said "You bastards!!" I tried to go after him but D pulled me away, and then my memory gets hazy again.... The next thing I remember is walking outside the mall in the parking lot and becoming lucid. There was some cool pattern in the clouds, but I can't remember what it was now. I decided to walk through the mall and gathered up a crowd of DCs around me all chanting a mantra of stability with me, something like "this dream is long, vivid, and solid". While we were walking around I was also picking up various pieces of furniture in the store effortlessly with one hand and hurling them across the store. I was really worked up and this girl next to me did part of the chant wrong, so I looked over and said "No!" and shoved her headfirst into a glass wall. It didn't break, she just hit it really hard and then fell over. When I saw that it was actually someone I know and like in waking life I felt bad, and I picked her up and sat her down on a chair to see if she was alright. After that I started getting kind of unfocused and the dream ended.

#3 - Too Much Energy [DILD]

The main thing I remember about this dream is that I was pissed when I realized it wasn't real, because it was going really well. I became lucid around the time I was doing all these crazy calculated flips around this huge auditorium that were really fun and impressive as hell, and then when I realized what was going on I just had endless amounts of energy. I got really unfocused and just started grabbing stuff and throwing it all over the place until I woke up.

#4 - Back Once Again [DILD]

I was back at my old middle school with O and we were visiting our old orchestra teacher Mr. L. Afterwards we somehow got lost in the crowd and became part of the student body there, so we started trying to find our English class that we were supposed to head to next. We realized that we needed to pick our schedules first, so we started walking to the office and on the way we saw an old friend of ours wearing this cute sweater that I own that looked totally weird on him. X) We were also on the second floor of the building and I could see a tower of people stacked on top of each other coming up and leaning in our direction from the first floor visible beyond the railing. >_> Around this time I became lucid, and I ran into the girl M in the hallway who I haven't seen at least since we graduated high school but who I knew since kindergarten. I walked up to her and said "Hey, girl." She came up to me and I grabbed her and ripped her shirt down and started groping her and kissing her neck, but I got a little too into it and the dream faded away.

I took 50 mg of zinc at dinner the night that this next dream happened. I like to think that it had an effect.

#5 - More Summoning And Possession Practice [DILD]

There was some weird school stuff going on this dream before my memory really cuts in. The first thing I really recall is becoming lucid while packing up my stuff in a dark room. I wasn't immediately lucid enough to break out of this action at first, so I started repeating a mantra "electricity works in dreams" while I kept trying to turn on the lights and use my cell phone light to help me find stuff. It worked to an extent, and some of the lights showed up or got brighter if they were already on. My cat was also in the room with me but walked out it and down the school hallway at some point. I decided to walk out to the hall myself and followed it down to a large open area in a very fancy hotel-type building. There was also a large window spanning several stores to the left of us that was visible because every floor ended in a balcony. I decided to fly forward and grabbed a sofa with people sitting on it with my right hand as I passed by it, and I phased us through the window. Outside I could see groups of people eating dinner at tables below us, and I chucked the couch at one of them and then just moved on without even really watching what happened. I flew higher up to where there was a rooftop balcony with no covering and saw a family eating dinner or something. I decided that I wanted to see if I could summon a whole group of people, so I flew a ways over to the next rooftop thinking that I wanted to see a small group of gossiping women. When I got there it worked perfectly, there were four women in classy dressed gossiping about something at a table, and they didn't seem to take notice of me. I decided to possess one of them but it didn't go completely smoothly, and the other women started looking at me (as her) and asking if I was alright, I was making weird faces trying to adjust the feeling. I finally started getting situated but then my libido started ramping up and it woke me up. Man, if I could just control that feeling without waking up more often....

That's it for now!

This is from November 21st, I just didn't get around to typing it all up before.

Early in the night I originally fell asleep on the couch in the living room in front of my laptop, then I woke up a couple to a few hours later and shut down everything in the house and moved to bed. So that technically makes these with a WBTB.

#1 - Creeper Nightmare [Non-Lucid]

Throughout this dream, for some reason all of the windows in my house had open blinds and were larger than normal, making it very easy to see into the house from the outside at any point. It was really creeping me out because in the house next to mine which was visible through the windows there were these four guys that kept peering around corners or over fences to just stare at me in a really freaky way, and then they would start laughing when I got anxious. Even when I tried to go out front or out back I would see them watching me from somewhere. At one point I was even crawling around on the floor in the house and reaching strategically over and around objects to avoid being seen by them, knowing that they were just out of eyesight staring into the window. Eventually I just got pissed, and I went out front, walked over to their fence, and jumped up on it in one swift movement. This is not uncommon for me; my dream self seems to think that walking on fences is fairly normal, though still something to be considered significant. I ran along the top until the second floor balcony of the next door house (which doesn't actually exist, it's a one-story house) and leapt over to it. I went in through the door and walked up to one of the guys who said "Oh shit!" and looked shocked. I was ready to smack a ho, but then my memory of the dream gets really blurry and I just remember there being something about my old friend T, I saw him for a second... but then, I woke up. Ah, well.

#2 - Modeling Assignment [Non-Lucid]

I was at some big school function where they paired us up with different students and had us take tests and do modeling jobs and stuff. There was some girl there that I was just trying to be nice to for some reason, and I remember lending her a pencil, but then she still got totally pissed at me for something. However, AB, this girl I used to know since elementary school but barely ever talked to since then, got up and started defending my honor with some long speech. Oh, also, I think for most of this dream, or at least this part onward, I was JY, this guy I also knew since elementary school. No idea why, I haven't thought about him in ages.... Anyway, like I said, we were paired off and we were supposed to be doing a modeling gig. For ours they were expecting us to submit some comic we'd made, but my partner was the one who had it on him and he didn't show up. I tried doing the gig myself and they told me my image was nice but it needed more, it had to be both of us or neither. I decided to go walking around the mall/school looking for my partner and somehow ended up back at my house. (My real house, not JY's house.) I was in my parents' bedroom and I decided to just jump back on the bed and give the guy a phone call. I told him the situation and he said that he had to ditch to go to a dentist appointment. I just said that that was fine because the school was just pushing us into it anyway so I didn't really care that much.

#3 - Nothing Wrong With A Little Bondage [Non-Lucid]

I was at some kind of station waiting for transportation with my parents, and there were these two random girls standing not far from us. I turned to my parents and asked them if the train that just left was the one that we were supposed to be taking, and the girls startled giggling and said that it was actually a bus. I just responded that we call it a train where I come from. It was clearly based on a train from around here, so I wasn't wrong lol. Eventually a couple more arrive and we got on a different one from them and I get a third-person view (from outside and behind the train, though it may have become a bus considering what we did next) of the train swerving through traffic and over all these crazy highways that bend at impossible angles. It basically looked like a huge video game obstacle course set up all around some big city full of skyscrapers. The dream then transitions to when I'm already off the train and I'm at a mall restaurant of some kind meeting up with M, some random DC, O, ET (heh, not the extra terrestrial), S (5 hits, for self-reference), and maybe C and a few others. We were going to do something though I can't remember exactly what now, and this random guy walked up to me and kissed my hand. I just patted him on the back and said "Sorry, I'm taken." and moved on, and I saw a friend comforting him as he walked away. Then, ET just up and decides to grab me by the arms from behind, pick me up, and hold me locked in some bondage position to parade me around the mall for everyone to see. At this point many of the people in the crowd were suddenly in fetishy outfits, and everyone was just staring at me amused as we went by. And yes, it was awesome. >.> I could hear the whole gang talking about movies or something behind me, but I never got back into the conversation before the dream ended. I had a brief false awakening where I typed up most of the previous dream on my phone, almost letting it fade from memory. Luckily, I still remembered it well upon waking for real.

#4 - And Now The Creepers Can Fly ;-; [MILD]

In this dream I felt that I was visiting home for the holidays, though I'm not entirely sure where exactly I would've been visiting from. I was wandering around outside on the side of my house by the next door neighbors' fence and I saw some random girl followed by SC, this girl I knew in middle school, breaking into their yard through the fence. The girl was saying that it's just something she likes to do to mess with people so they have to take the time to clean their yards up. Now this next part I really have no memory of at all, though I really wish I did. Instead, I'll just have to quote it. "Then some old guy comes running by and uses me as an external pacemaker for a second." I go back inside my house through the garage and see the girls sitting out back and think that something must be up because they should still have been in the neighbors' yard. I approach our back door and think to myself "Alright, if I can fly right through it then this is a dream." I leapt off the ground and went right through the door and wall and flew into the sky. I was excited, but immediately after the happiness set in and I turned around slightly and saw some creepy guy flying right behind me. I had an adrenaline rush and the scene transitioned into my bedroom, and I was convinced that I'd ruined my shot. I almost lost this dream to a false awakening as well, but thankfully I woke up shortly afterward.

Flying Around School [DILD]

This dream is pretty much a fragment. I was doing stuff at school for most of it, but I can't really remember what any of that stuff was now. O and D were there, however; that I know for sure. At one point I got tired of walking through the hallway so I just lied down and started gliding across the ground. This and the flying that followed soon afterward made me become lucid. Really all I did for the rest of the dream was phase through the walls to get outside and then fly around above the school. Right before I woke up I also got a strange out-of-body sense that I wasn't myself but rather was controlling some skinny guy white bleached blonde spikes in his hair, and I got a somewhat decent bird's-eye visual of him.

Yesterday

Dream Fragment - This one was technically more than a fragment as it was fully developed, I just don't really remember much about it now, so I can't fill in the details for my notes. "I go to a book/department store-based event, like A-Kon or something, with old [my senior high school] people at it. Walking around, not giving a fuck what people think. Yeah, look at the food."

Childhood Memories? [DILD]

I was driving my old jeep and my old friend JRE and I parked it somewhere deep in a forest. After we got out, we walked to where there was some bus stop and got on the bus, which then took us to some downtown area. Though I'm pretty sure I experienced all or most of our downtown adventure, I know there were tons of people that I potentially know. All I really remember of it now was wandering around a parking lot with JRE, and he was getting annoyed at me for acting childish (in a playful way), or something like that. Eventually we end up getting back on the bus, and initially JRE sits far away from me but he eventually moves up to where I am. The bus is traveling through the forest, and somehow it turns into the legs of an AT-ST (the two-legged robot walkers from Star Wars) with a tiny couch seat on top, where JRE and I are sitting. Of course, this all seems perfectly normal at the time. I was just admiring how vivid all of the forest surroundings were, and I had the sudden sense that JRE and I might be having a shared dream. Oh snap, this is a dream! I looked over at JRE and started doubting whether or not this was really shared, and I decided to slap him on the back to see just how stable he was. As I did he exploded into sand, and my hand continued to move straight through where he had been sitting. As the AT-ST legs took me back to where the Jeep was, I had the strangest sense that this dream was connecting me to my childhood memories, though it's hard to explain the sensation now. As I was approaching the Jeep, I looked down and noticed that I was wearing what appeared to be a transparent white one-piece bathing suit. It did make me happy, though. I got in the car and grabbed the wheel, which was now invisible, as the dream was sort of falling apart around me. I either drove or just phased forward through some kind of "wall" which I can't even describe that was in front of me now, and then everything went black, and soon I woke up.

Today

#1 - The Perfect Lawn [Non-Lucid]

There was a family party going on at my house and my aunt C and cousin S were there at least (and I think probably my uncle N as well), and all I remember is that I was relaxing in my bedroom and I knew that they were spending a lot of time in my parents' bedroom for some reason, and then they walked out and went into the guest bathroom, where my other aunt D suddenly walked down the hall trying to get to and was mad that it was already occupied. I think my mom was with her, too. Somewhere down the line (I think the dream may have skipped forward a bit), I decided to go swimming out back. I also became Jackie (Mila Kunis) from That '70s Show. Donna (Laura Prepon) was also there and I was trying to get her to swim with me, but she didn't want to get in the pool. :T I believe it skipped forward again and we were walking down the street that extends directly outward from my house (we're centered at a three-way intersection), and I was looking around for lawns that had sprinklers covering them with water (sometimes even sprinklers shooting water on to them from the middle of the street ). My aim was to find a yard that was so wet... that the grass and dirt had entered a complete liquidy consistency, so I'd be able to swim in it. ._. I even found one that I thought might be good, and I dipped my toes in it and saw it ripple. I turned around and said something to Donna I believe, but then I woke up.

Dream Fragment - I was hanging out with N and I think R on my back porch, and suddenly we were in the pool and N was talking about how he found some amazing ecstasy tabs recently, claiming he'd taken only a third of one and ended up rolling really hard. I ended these notes with "Me disappoint." Not entirely sure what that's supposed to mean here. >_>

Dream Fragment - I was with NS, this guy I knew through my entire public schooling career but then never saw again after we graduated, and we were walking around at some kind of Star Wars convention... or something....

#2 - An Old Goal Completed By Chance [MILD]

I was lying on my bed with my old friend D, and for some reason we were lying extremely close to each other, with our faces almost touching (but it wasn't supposed to mean anything, it was just taken as totally normal at the time ). Though I'm not sure if there even was much dream content before this, I had an underlying knowledge that we were in a Heroes-like world. Derek had the power of cryokinesis (ice generation/freezing) and I had the totally broken ability of absorbing the powers of anyone around me. Since we just happened to be right there next to each other, I grabbed his cryokinesis for myself. I suddenly had the knowledge of how to use it and everything. The dream skipped forward to he and I standing at an intersection, like actually in the lanes where the cars would be, waiting for the lights to turn so we could keep walking. I was in the left-hand turning lane, and D was arguing with me about something, though I can't remember what it was now. I was getting fed up with him, and when the light turned I flew off into the air and turned left down the road. Realizing that I was flying was enough to make me become lucid, and I knew immediately what I had to do. I thrust my arm out at a nearby plant while flying by and made the same kind of psychic-power-hand-gesture pose I make while using telekinesis, and the plant instantly froze over. It works!!!! Now I'll know how to do this from now on! I decided to freeze a car too, and it worked, but then it almost immediately just turned into a different white car and kept trying to drive slowly. Clearly the skill needs some work, but it's good to know that I can at least use it now. I wanted to try to freeze a human, so I looked for a DC and noticed a girl walking on the sidewalk not too far ahead of me. I pounced on her, expecting it to be playful... but apparently I put a bit more force into it than I meant to, because it killed her. O_O I was disappointed for a second, but then thought I'd give something else a try... and with one more psychic hand gesture, she came back to life! That's two new abilities! I ended up rolling around on the ground with her trying to get her into focus because my vision was fading away and I was having a tough time saving it, and finally I was able to freeze her, but I only heard it because my vision had already faded to black. Oh well, there's always next time! Shortly afterward, I woke up.

Dream Fragment - I was with D again and we had ordered pizza at his house (which wasn't really his house), but we were having them deliver it to my house so that we could drive over there to get it. We got here and ended up working on some homework on my dad's computer for some reason, but the pizza never arrived. I kept staring out the window for it, but only some girls I vaguely knew in middle and high school drove up but never got out of their car. I wanted that pizza. :C

Dream Fragment - My mom was asking me if the ball at the end of my poi was actually just a gigantic Skittle.

#1 - Dream Drug OBEs [Non-Lucid]

My dad and I each smoked some weed laced with synthetic cannabinoids, at least a good few and including JWH-420, and we ended up having heavy out-of-body experience trips for a while. I don't really remember what happened other than a few flashes of color. When I finally started calming down and come back to "reality", I noticed that my dad was still pretty out of it. I went to my bed to lie down and turned off the lights, and then I woke up in my real bed.

Dream Fragment - There was a family party going on but I can't remember where, some swimming occurred, our family friend DE and my cousin GA were there and GA had apparently just come out of the closet, or something... and finally there was talk about going off to college, but I can't even recall who it was about.

#2 - Lucid Fragment Again [DILD]

All I remember is that I became lucid and I told myself I had to keep focus. And that's it. :T *sigh*

#3 - Creepy Party [Non-Lucid]

There was some really bizarre party going on with a bunch of people there, and I don't really remember much about it other than being scared and deciding to leave with O. We walked out to a parking lot and decided to meet up at my house, and when I got in my car I noticed that I was really high, and I felt it was off of a synthetic cannabinoid. I felt cautious about driving, but noticed it barely took me a second to be at some highway intersection. Soon after that I woke up.

#4 - Changing Rooms [Non-Lucid]

I was in some kind of clothing store and lost in what I wrote in my notes as a "matrix of rooms and bathrooms." Basically I was looking for a changing room, and there were rows and columns of hallways with rooms in between each intersection, mostly consisting of bathrooms and changing rooms that were too revealing, and occasionally just an actual hallway. I was walking around in a pink one-piece bathing suit and carrying lots of different clothes, and at one point I walked past a group of women just standing around and changing out in the open. They chuckled at me as I walked by distressed, I guess because I wasn't as willing to change in the open as them lol.

#5 - Lucid Nonsense [DILD]

No memory of when I was non-lucid, but I do know a good amount of things happened. I became lucid at my house and flew to the laundry room where some random guy was standing. I tried to punch him and it went in a sort of slow motion and he dodged it. I turned around and saw another guy standing in the kitchen, so I flew up to him and this time he tried to punch me, again in slow motion, but as he did I grabbed his arm and directed it towards the other guy, hitting him this time and seeing my face in the microwave door as I passed by it. My memory gets a little hazy at this point, but I talked to my dad to make sure it was still a dream, and then I touched some stuff to stabilize. I randomly decided to grab a bottle of mustard that was sitting on the kitchen counter and pour it on to the floor, but nothing came out despite there being a squirting sound. I told myself that the mustard must have covered the whole outside world! And when I looked outside everything had some mustard on it. I didn't really get to explore it, though. My vision got weird and I started seeing my arms resting in front of me like in a bed, and I started thinking that I must've been waking up and my eyes were opening. I fought it but eventually I just gave in.

False Awakening - I started typing up my dream and got a little less than half way through, but then I fully woke up and luckily didn't lose too much.

Lucid Fragment [DILD]

"In a mall, N, melanieb, flying through holes in a wall and a hallway, possession."

Yeah, so basically all I remember about this dream is what I have there. I became lucid, I flew, I possessed someone, and melanieb was there.... Damn you, memory!

Sigh. I'm pretty sure it was fairly in-depth, too.

#1 - Surrounded [Non-Lucid]

This dream sucked. We were in some evil house with killers wandering around outside, they would always wait at the windows and when we looked in that direction the blinds would be closed, but then they're start turning and we'd see the killers just staring in and then they'd just through the window. It was so nerve-wracking that by the end of the dream it was over and I was back at my house safe and sound but I couldn't stop myself from pushing the couch I was sitting on into the wall behind me over and over again without rest because I was having a bit of nervous breakdown and I couldn't accept that there was no one behind me trying to get me. I was very happy when I woke up from that one.

#2 - My Flying Pet [DILD]

O and I were in some alternate version of my house with my cousin P, and there were lots of girls that I remember "knowing" in the dream but I can't recall who any of them were now. They were all talking to P and for some reason O and I were getting really uncomfortable, but I don't remember much of the plot at this point. O and I somehow made it out of that alternate dimension and into our correct one, where we came swimming through a field of grass next to my real house to get there. Yes, swimming, we were actually half submerged in the grass and it had flowing waves like water. O left to go to his house and I went in mine, which looked like it was half in some weird jungle, in fact the lighting in the area was actually very surreal and video game-like, there was an orange tint to everything. As I was walking into my house I felt pumped and became lucid. I started yelling lucidity and control mantras to myself and noticed that my voice sounded different. More... distinguished. I like it. The backyard looked like it was fused with some sort of playground so I went out there and looked up at the top of the structure. I summed LK, a girl I knew in school, and she appeared up on the top. I told her to pull me up there and she almost got it, I had to fly a little bit too. I jumped on her back and she acted shocked for a second but then I did a "Hya!" yell and she flew us off into the air and we just darted all over the place until I woke up. Wonderful!

#3 - We Meet Again [DILD]

This dream was a long one, though I actually only remember very little of it. There were two plots going on, one involving me which strangely I remember nothing of, and another that involved some random guy and Hayden Panettiere, my original celebrity crush.





My clear memory comes in on the last part of the dream, I'm seeing Hayden and the guy each wearing similar strapless tops with ink blot patterns on them, black skirts, and heels. The guy didn't look half bad! Hayden and the guy have been running from some evil organization guys for a while now and Hayden says that they're about to have to start running again. After walking behind a crowd in my vision they each took off in different directions and a guy followed Hayden into a store, so I went in too. My involvement in the scene became a little less passive now, I was actually there instead of just watching. I turned lucid as I was going into the store and watched Hayden and the guy running through people really fast. Hayden was now wearing something more like a tracksuit, an outfit much better suited for this activity. I think to myself "This looks fun!" and move my perspective forward and zoom into Hayden's body. Oooh, limber! I keep running and start weaving my way through crowds of people while keeping away from the guy, it was pretty fun. But after not too long the dream started fading, and I tried to bring it back failed. Oh well.

I've been really lazy about logging DJ entries and checking others lately, but I'm trying to get back into it now, starting with these dreams from the past week or so. I got lucid four times despite smoking lots of weed, too!

April 28th

#1 - Unemptiable Mouth RC [DILD]

I was hanging out at the house of this kid AB who I knew in high school, except it was actually my house and we were hanging out in my parents' bedroom. It was just us and some random people, and AB apparently smokes weed now (which would NEVER happen in real life). I can't remember much of this part, but I know we got a pizza and we finished it but I still wanted more, so I said I was going to head out and get some since everyone else wanted to go somewhere else. At the door when I was getting ready to go I noticed that RE was with us as well. Now first of all, the way I was thinking of this was that AB, RE, and I all lived in my same neighborhood, and AB and I each lived in mirror copies of the same house. There's a street that extends directly out from my house, and in this dream the whole neighborhood was just symmetrical around this one street, so on the other side would be my house again, the one that's actually my house. Yes.... RE also lived on the other side but one street over, so we decided to walk home together. I realized that this was my first time seeing him since he got signed to a label for one of his latest songs (which actually happened in waking life), so I congratulated him for it. Instead of taking the symmetrical street we went to the next one over and started walking down it, and somehow it turned into a huge bazaar with lots of restaurants intermixed in it. RE went to stand in line to get some food, but I just sat down at a small table not far from him. Suddenly my mouth started seeming very full of chewed up food and it was really starting to bug me, it seemed like no matter how much more I chewed up and swallowed there was always the same amount still in my mouth, so I started just spitting it out on the table and it still wouldn't reduce in volume. O's mom suddenly showed up out of nowhere and sat down at the table with me, and I felt embarrassed because I couldn't say anything. I pointed to my mouth and made a weak gesture and she nodded, it looked like she was chewing something too. I went back to my annoyance and started getting really upset about it, thinking "This only happens when... I'm dreaming." The area has suddenly become a 7-Eleven-like store, and I get up excitedly and say to a DC a couple of times that I'm dreaming, to which he grumbles "Yeah, I heard ya the first time!" and walks off trying to mind his own business. I just flew around the store a little bit and tried to use the windows to teleport myself, but it didn't really work. After enough bouncing around, the dream faded. I woke up without moving and with my eyes still closed, so I thought about attempting a DEILD, but then I got antsy and decided I'd rather remember this dream for sure instead since it was my first lucid in a while.

#2 - Cute High School Guy [DILD]

I saw this girl... wow, her name would also be AB, I didn't foresee this problem. >w< Anyway, AB and this guy T whose last name initial I don't know, were walking around my old high school where I ran into them. It seems that they still go to high school despite the fact that they're also celebrating T's 23rd birthday, and it appears as if they're dating. T starts asking me to do something for him involving a bridge and digging but I can't remember exactly what now, though I agree to do it at the time. There was also talk of a monster...? Anyway, I start walking down one of the school hallways and see some black lagoon-type humanoid monster just standing there, and lazily think "I'm dreaming." I fly down the hallway and there was some cute guy standing there. I landed and the dream started fading a little bit, and I told him to hug me because I needed to stabilize. He did and I grabbed his ass while he was doing it. :3 After that, I took my glasses off for some reason and everything got really blurry. Wonderful move, me.... I put them back on but it didn't help anything, so I just gave up trying to save the dream and let it fade away.

April 29th

Dream Fragment - "D's house base, McDonald's food drug makes you full, K, aunts S and D."

Dream Fragment - "A's boyfriend drive to movie dad meets us turn into M SSRI serotonin control dopamine M burped by boyfriend by being thrown into the air hilarious everyone so happy, dave1701 doing SSRI presentation, among others."

Negligent Sisters [Non-Lucid]

I had sisters (I'm an only child in waking life) that I normally forgot about because I never saw them, at least a few. I claimed that the last time I'd see any of them was around 15 years ago. J was over (and refusing to shut the door to my room no matter how many times I told him to) and getting to know them before coming into my room to wake me up in the morning, having spent the night. He talks about my sisters and I said if he was getting to know them then he probably knows them better than I do, and I'm obviously feeling a little dejected. He starts talking about how he'll have to take me home soon because he has stuff to do during the day, and I'm like "What the fuck? I'm already home....", and suddenly we can't remember who drove him over. I look out front and neither of our cars are there so I start getting a little concerned, but then I wake up.

April 30th

Waiting For Class To End [Non-Lucid]

I was doing some really bizarre worksheet in a high school class and then I got up to stand at the door with this girl A who's last name I forget. We could hear some kids yelling funny stuff with a musical track playing on the other side of the door, and we start making fun of it and I do a little dance that makes A laugh. We eventually pushed the door open to hear the music and I recognized it at the time but I forgot when I woke up.

May 1st

#1 - Horny Teacher [Non-Lucid]

This girl who I don't know wants me to help her go to the game store (which is apparently anti-Jew ) at some vacation spot, I don't remember exactly where. The store ends up being a medicine store owned by my old Chinese class teacher. He tries speaking to me in Chinese and I don't understand him, but I don't need to to pick up on his incredibly lewd gestures. I laugh weakly and the girl and I leave (oh, also, I lost a sandal right outside the store and magically had it back on when we left), and then we see the actual game store we meant to go to. As we're walking in we look at each other and back at the medicine store and I say "Pervy old man."

#2 - Transporting Bodies [DILD]

I was helping a group of people transport bodies in bags into a truck being driven by a fake cop that's behind some huge house. The people weren't dead though, just unconscious. One of the bodies was actually melanieb, and I saw her sneak a quick glance before pretending to be knocked out again as she was put into a bag. I finally finish taking all the bags over and then walk out to the front of the house and become lucid. I try to make all the windows in the house suddenly shatter but it isn't really working, so instead I fly up to the roof and lay on my stomach and feel the brick texture, and I was intenting to make something of it but then I woke up.

May 2nd

Spa Adventures [DILD]

There was a lot of dream leading up to this, but most of it is blurry in my memory. I was at some kind of resort hotel/apartment all by myself, and I went out to a room that was supposed to be like a private spa tub room. I got in the tub and was enjoying myself, but was also somewhat afraid that someone was going to break into my apartment, for whatever reason, but after I got up and locked the door to the spa room I stopped worrying about that. I looked around and noticed that there were no walls in the room, in fact the huge hotel building was built in a square design with all of the spa tub rooms directly on top of and under each other and all facing inwards in the square, so I could actually see lots of other people using their tubs as well. It was mostly girls, but some guys too. I became a bit concerned for my own privacy, but then figured that I'm already looking at everyone else, so, eh. Across from me and to the left a bit I saw a creepy guy looking straight at me, with some weird woman crawling around like an animal next to him. I tried to act like I hadn't seen him but it was too late, he yelled to her to get me, and she jumped all the way over to my tub and cornered me. She's reaching into my forehead and I'm freaking out, but she says "I'm just prying open your third eye so that you...." Well, there was more, but that part's a secret. Sorry! So I say "Oh, okay!" When she finishes opening my third eye, I'm suddenly standing in one of the hotel/apartment rooms again, and I think to myself that that was pretty crazy was just happened, it must have been some kind of hallucination or something. I happily walk off, but quickly become suspicious, so I do a noseplug RC for the first time ever in a dream. Holy crap, it works! Now I know what it's like to breath through my nose when it's pinched shut. I fly out through the window until I end up at some pool area where there are what seems to be a few random employees and a Chinese man and his daughter (?). I had a lot of energy so I was just yelling gibberish at them like usual and repeating stabilization mantras to myself, which seemed to work pretty well. The man and his daughter started getting into a fight so I flew off and started traveling down different hallways in the main hotel building. A thought suddenly occurs to me that if I'm dreaming now then maybe what happened was I fell asleep in the tub and the woman opening my third eye was hypnagogic imagery, and now I'm slowly drowning there in my sleep. I freaked out a bit but finally managed to "wake myself up".

False Awakening - Ah, safe at last, back in the spa tub. Happiness sets in, then suspicion. Noseplug RC. Damn it! Oh well. Totally forgetting about my imagined danger, I fly off and hover around the other floors' spa rooms. One pretty much directly below me is occupied by three very gorgeous and very naked women just chilling in their tub, and I was intent on joining them. X3 But then I woke up. D: Damn it!

I Am Speed [DILD]

This was a very long dream. I remember vaguely playing this game before this happened, but not much of the content. I was playing some new Pokémon ROM based on Red and Blue that I was apparently making, and was amazed at how good it was. (Even in the dream, I didn't actually remember making it.) I was showing D how crazy it was, but I only remember that from hearing it in the background; the screen took up my entire vision. I was in a Cinnabar Island-like area, and I laughed that at one point the whole map went from black and white to color, then back again almost instantly. I went inside the Pokémon center and the scene totally changed. It was some big panoramic view of a bar scene, with the healing station up in the front with an animated background playing behind it. I can't remember much of what happened there at the bar, but I got sucked into it and started experiencing it in first-person perspective. I met this girl there who I've known since elementary school, and I've been calling her M but for the sake of not mixing her up with my more current friend, I'll stick to ML from now on. I think she said something about some people being injected with some drug or virus, but they may have been inserted later by my false awakening.... Anyway, this dream was REALLY long, even from this point on, it had to have been at least another 20 or 30 minutes. Unfortunately a lot of my memory of this point is lost, but I'm pretty sure I became at least somewhat lucid somewhere in here.

I don't remember the realization, but I do remember the clarity of thought, knowing I had control, and remembering that it was lucid in my false awakening. For most of the dream, ML and I were trying to get away from this guy I used to hang out with named JB, who had been chasing us ever since the bar. He ended up following us around some huge building which I don't recognize as anywhere real, but it contained all types of strange rooms and structures. We were flying to get away from him, and my memory starts coming back in when we were in a movie theater room. We were just trying to watch the movie, but we sensed that he was there again, and ML slowly whispered to me to fly backwards into him. I did that and it totally caught him off guard, and then we both zoomed off. My memory gets a little hazy for a second, but then I'm standing a hallway somewhere in the building. I started flying forward again, and this time I started thinking to myself that "I am the fastest I could ever be, no one is faster than I am." My speed started increasing faster and faster and faster, and everything in my vision was moving so quickly that it looked like it was just bouncing all around my line of sight. Then finally, reality broke. My perception of my speed passed some kind of barrier, and it was no longer that I was feeling how fast I was going as much as it was that I just was speed... like there was no "normal" speed to compare it to. Very hard to describe. I was hit with the sudden feeling that the entire building map was open to me simultaneously, like I could see around all walls at once. I was still moving, so I was just warping all around the building. I was moving so quickly that my environment was just flashing and warping from one scene to the next. I felt like I was bursting with power but also pushing myself out of control, and then it suddenly faded. I guess I made it too unstable.

False Awakening - I woke up and tried sooo hard to get all of this dream typed up. N and D were both there and they wouldn't shut the fuck up. I kept telling them "Seriously guys, this dream was so amazing, please just let me type it." They would agree for half a second and then continue trying to distract me with stuff, and N wouldn't stop talking about how whenever he sings the lyrics to "Brown Eyed Girl" he gets it wrong and says either "blonde eyed" or "green eyed". (I can't remember which he said, I think it was the former, though.) D kept trying to hand me some keyboard, which I claimed was "memory foam" and told him to go put it in my parents' bedroom. Of course, if I'd looked around for even a second I would have realized that the environment I was in looked NOTHING like my house, and was in fact actually more similar to the building from the dream, but... oh well. When I finally woke up so much memory of the dream had escaped me. But I least I got what I did.

#1 - Holding Down The Fort [DILD]

I only really remember the part of this dream where I was lucid. I vaguely recall flying around mountain ranges at some park... or something.... And then, I was in a school with a bunch of people and we were doing some kind of intense LARP battle. I run to some small, sealed, closet-sized room but with window and lock myself inside. People would run up to the door trying to open it, then I was suddenly lash out phasing through the door, grab their arms or legs, and snap them with super strength.

#2 - Aesthetic Lucid And Link Contact [DILD]

I remember something about my dad intending to buy me a new home, and I was walking around some neighborhood with this guy S I knew in middle and high school, though didn't get to talk to all that much. I think he was here because O mentioned that he was going to see him for the first time in years the last time I hung out with him. We walked up to some gigantic building, and I wanted to see into it. It had kind of a cool stylistic architecture that's hard to describe, but we also saw a few other buildings being built that way, including a McDonald's. I became lucid and flew up to the top to look inside, and there's no ceiling - the top is huge and totally open. I went down and grabbed on to a ledge and just let my feet dangle inside the building while feeling the wind blow past me. I spend most of the time here just enjoying the scenery, there were massive open fields and mountain ranges all around me that I could see faaaar into the distance of due to the altitude I was at. It was really cool.

False Awakening - I wrote down the dream, which almost totally screwed me over because when I woke up for real I remembered being lucid but not what happened, luckily it finally came back. I got up and went to play some Digimon game that I remember very little of now, but I do remember that it was long and intense. I finally beat it in the end and then got up and started browsing the internet on my computer. I was at a site that listed game data for all the different Pokémon. I was looking up Exeggutor's moves, and then suddenly the text on the screen scrolled to the right and new text was appearing in its place. It was some kind of chat log. The first few lines were this:

Aly!
Aly!
This is Link!

:O I think I saw the word "incredible" in there somewhere too, but I can't really remember the rest. After I started comprehending what it meant, I woke up. :T

I had several more dreams than these but I couldn't log them down because my phone was acting weird. :T Oh well. At least I got the lucid one down.

#1 - Bizarre Family Party [Non-Lucid]

This one I just remember a few bits and pieces of. I was at a family party, there was some "moon scare" going on referencing some sort of apocalypse, it was my cousin K's birthday, my cousin G was suddenly legally allowed to drink alcohol despite being 17 years old, I talked about how I was hanging out with M and a couple other people before the party, out in front of the house a runaway bicycle came out of nowhere and rammed into some random guy's nuts, causing one of them to burst with blood flying everywhere , and finally a third-person view of some strange Futurama episode where Bender and Hermes got fused together.

Dream Fragment - I accidentally stumbled upon some YouTube video about "secular graduation" (something related to school), and all I remember about it is that there were lots of theater kids from my high school starring in it which surprised me, and there were these two Asian kids at the end. One of them was a bit chubby and had short, straight, silvery white hair, and the other was very thin with a blonde beard but a black goatee.

#2 - FLCL Throwback? [MILD]

I was back at my middle school in a regular classroom but it was in the music hall. I was playing a Pokémon game with a bunch of random people and then C, an old friend and amazing weed dealer, comes in and joins us. Eventually he's heading out again and I decide to go with him, but when we get out into the hallway I realize it's a totally different person. I follow him out to the cafeteria anyway, only all of the tables are gone, and he's talking about OpheliaBlue, someone else I can't remember, and cheese. Slowly I start to think that something's not right, and then I realize that I'm dreaming. There are a ton of DCs walking around, and I tried to do something that failed but I can't remember what it was now. I saw some oddly placed lockers and decided to fly over to them, and as I did a couple of them magically opened, and there was just one big locker space behind them. There was a sheet of music in them, so I picked it up and then went over to a DC and yelled at them "Make music come off this page!" However, I was flailing the paper around in my hand as I was saying this and I guess that caused it to lose shape, I saw it morphing so I stopped shaking it and it took solid shape as a red electric guitar. o.o I shrugged and whacked the DC on the head with it, and he fell over and I flew off. I turned around to look at him a second later but all the DCs in the area had already changed drastically, and he was gone. I was just hovering above the crowd and decided to whack someone else too, so I did and as he fell over slowly his head popped off. I flew off but the dream started fading, I had lost my sense of sight and I could tell it was about to end.

False Awakening - This was fairly interesting.... I woke up, but didn't open my eyes. I guess that might've been connected to the lack of visual input at the end of the lucid, but I just perceived it as keeping my eyes closed. I felt my surroundings and could tell that it wasn't right. Upon a little inspection I realized I was lying down in a bathtub with just a little bit of water in it, I could feel the porcelain edges and everything. I considered the idea that this was some sort of strange tactile hallucination based on my bed that was just continuing because my dreaming mind hadn't totally shut down yet and I hadn't opened my eyes yet to break the illusion. However, when I actually did open my eyes I was lying in my bed in a totally different position, so it was definitely a false awakening.

I had a dream before and after this one, but I was too lazy to write them down. They're not important, anyway.... I spent like eight hours helping a friend do yard work immediately after getting up so I don't remember much of this dream other than what I wrote down, but what's really important to me is what happened at the end....

Vividness Is An Illusion [DILD]

So first, the part of the dream I just barely remember. It was another high school dream, and there was some plot going on about some girl who wanted to kill us all and expected me to play along with it. (I don't remember this in the slightest, it's just from the notes). There was lots of really trippy stuff going on though, like when I was in a hallway and couldn't figure out which way to go, I looked at a wall and saw this guy J's face attached to the wall smiling this creepy smile and tilted sideways in the correct direction, so I smiled back and walked that way. Also, I remember being in a class and seeing my cat walking around, and people wanted me to follow them so I told them to hold up while I put my cat away. I picked up my backpack and unzipped the center area to put him in, but when I looked inside there was another cat already in there, and he looked like he was starving. I said "Oh shit! I must have put this other cat in here already and forgot about him, my bad.", then just left them both there and walked off. Anyway, so the girl that was trying to kill us wanted me to do something, but I didn't fall for her trap this time. I became very mildly lucid and just flew up, phasing through the higher floors, until I was over the building. I was just trying to get away from the girl and didn't really have any goals in mind, so from high up I just watched some kids playing soccer in the distance until I woke up.

This is where it got interesting for me. I'm no longer confused about the last time I woke up and was still dreaming but everything was SO real, including detail I hadn't actually seen before, and I even was pretty sure I was awake at first but then lost focus, in a way that false awakenings don't. That and this were hypnopompic hallucinations. So I woke up in bed, facing the wall. It was pretty dark still, but then suddenly I heard a guy talking extremely clearly and there was sounds of cheering on a TV. I didn't see either one, but I immediately got mental images, the voice was coming from a heavyset black man and the TV (which was not actually on) was showing some soccer game. Unlike the last time where I was asked by a hallucinated M if I was up and I responded "I think I'm awake....", but then forgot about it when I started listening to her, this time I knew exactly what was going on. I started mentally repeating to myself "It's a hallucination, it's a hallucination...." I got a very clear image of what was going on in the soccer game too, there were no players at all, just several soccer balls of different sizes. They were moving in strange trajectories one at a time until they hit the next one and caused it to roll, sort of like dominoes causing each other to fall over. The man was talking about the game, though I can't remember what he was saying now, it was all rather startling and I wasn't paying much attention, not to mention my short-term memory was still pretty terrible. Eventually though he started just saying complete gibberish words, and I knew the hallucination was falling apart. I took a leap of faith and quickly turned over to see if he was there, but the room was empty. All the sounds vanished, and I felt very dissociated for a second, and then I returned to full waking consciousness. There was no feeling of waking up because I was already awake, just sort of a transitional blip.

Basically what I can say about this is... it made me realize how much we fool ourselves into thinking that regular lucid dreams are vivid. I'm sure they can be made extremely vivid like this, but they're still nowhere near as vivid as waking life. My most realistic dream, which I previously would have said was possibly even more vivid than reality, now just seems like a hallucination compared to this. Senses like hearing and sight can definitely be waaay up there in dreams, the amount of detail in specific objects can definitely match reality, but there's so much more that just isn't present in dreams. In waking life your brain constantly monitors your heart rate, breathing rate, the position of each of your limbs and how comfortable they are, what temperature you are in various parts of your body, whether you have any itches, if you're hungry, thirsty, bloated, sweaty, physically nervous.... All five of your senses are constantly at work at full vividness, your brain knows that it has to keep itself aware of EVERYTHING in your line of sight and peripherals, not just what you're focusing on, it has stay aware of even the slightest sounds or changes in taste or smell or feeling. Basically, in waking life, your brain knows it can't just let loose like it can in dreams. Together these make for soooo much detail missing in dreams unless you're specifically focused on it, it's ridiculous. The reason we can feel like dreams are so vivid is because we don't normally consciously think about this stuff, and in dreams it's hard to remember what it's like to be in the waking world anyway, but this vividness is an illusion. Even when you're on drugs and awake and hallucinating in reality, they have a dreamy feeling to them and you often lose track of some of these sensations. This was different. I was in reality, totally hallucinating, and totally lucid. This feeling of knowing you're in a dream while being in the waking world was mind-blowing, at least to me. This is something I won't soon be forgetting. I wonder how much work it could take, what level of awareness would be required, to recreate sensations this powerful in dreams....