I think RC's failing within your dreams come from not performing them properly. RC's shouldn't be done as an action, they are designed to bring you awareness.
If all you do when you RC is just try and poke your finger through your hand and see what happens, even when you do it in your dreams it will just not work. When you RC you need to pause, become aware of all of your senses, the environment around you, the feeling in the room. Does anything stand out? How do you feel? ARE you dreaming? Make sure! Expect to be dreaming every time you do an RC, know full well that you are able to push your finger through your hand, or breathe in through your nose. You need to doubt everything around you, and always have confidence in your RC's.
I used to have failed RC's until I realised that I was just doing them too often and too fast. I started really questioning reality whenever I did them, and combined them with awareness whenever I did, and I haven't had one fail since.
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