Last night, when I was in bed, I closed my eyes and focused on one thought: "I will remember I'm dreaming, I will remember I'm dreaming" over and over and over again. I watched the light behind my eyelids as I went. If my attention wandered, I returned it back to remembering to remember I'm dreaming.

And I succeeded... at keeping myself awake, and nothing else.

I was about to fall asleep once, but I snapped myself back awake - really awake. My heart was beating very fast, and I couldn't get back to sleep. That always happens... if pull myself out of unconsciousness like that, I'm absolutely wide awake afterwards, no matter how sleepy I was before. So, I can't turn around and try again. That's happened many, many times to me, but I've never seen anything written about that kind of experience.

What am I doing wrong here? I've tried counting, but if I stuck with that I'd probably get to a thousand before I fell asleep.