Jakro Goes Hardcore Into LDs

Couple of crap days again. Let's delve into a nightmare classic. One of the last dreams of 2009 I'm gonna write here.

Vicious Attack
Date: December 6th, 2009
Lucid: No

I was in the edge of our fields, and there was also my brother and his girlfriend. Some airplane flew over as and it's engine sounded weird. Dad came at the edge of the field, next to the forest wall towards us.

Nearby, there was a relatively big barn. Under the barn's roof there was a space, from which you could see inside the barn. In that space there were couple of guys.

You could hear from the heights, how the plane turned steeply. Someone shouted "Woo!" from the plane. My dad kept walking closer, but the guys in the barn were shouting at him for come to there.

Dad noticed that they were calling him, but he didn't react to it, rather walking to us. The plane landed on our field. It was odd that it could land there so effortlessly so near us. The plane was white, and through it went blue stripes. It was very wide and the rudder was weird.

Out from the plane came an old, disgusting looking old bald guy and three of (presumably) his sons. Oldest of them were around 20, the two others a bit younger. All of them were at least slightly fat. My brother was doing his boxing defense poses in front of our dad, which made me expect something of an aggressive encounter.

The old guy started talking about some piece of metal, with what my brother had apparently hit one of his boys. It seemed though that he was just using that as an excuse revenge some grudges he had for our dad. He had a knife in his hand, and it wasn't like a small carving knife, but a big, mean-looking meat-cutting knife. The boys were armed as well, with many kinds of blunt weapons.

"Why do you even exist?" The old guy attacked at us verbally. He started spouting some shit about agricultural law, that didn't even make any sense. Basically he insisted, that we were worthless human beings. Apprently dad had not done some thing he should have done, according to the law. What the fuck?

"If someone has broken the law, then you call the police", I intervened, and my argument was perfectly sensible. "You can't take the law on your own hands. It would result in an anarchy."

But it obviously did no help. This dream had already decided to escalate all the way. Somehow I got hold of the guys knife, and I fuckin thrusted it to the old guys side! I aimed for non-lethal spots (there's no self-defence in Finnish law - you kill a guy and you go to jail). I guess I should have gone for the kill, as the guy only got more enraged. I guess I'd get too if I had a knife in my side.

"I'm gonna kill you!" He raged. But instead of attacking me, he moved towards my dad. Somehow he got another knife and slashed at my dad with it. He only hit his arm, but that got over my threshold of horror, so I woke up.

Ironically, after 31 days of recalling dreams and a first full month ever for me, I lose the streak right on the first day of February. Too bad. The streak is gone, so maybe I'll finally have a lucid dream for a change this month. Barren streak now extends to 46 days.

Anyways, let's delve into another "classic". This is a really short, but has enough curiosity factor to make it here.

Cristiano Ronaldo Smackdown
Date: November 13th, 2009
Lucid: Yes

I was in what seemed like a football (soccer) field. It was dark. Cristiano Ronaldo was there as well and we ended up playing against - but not soccer, some other game. He grabbed the ball on his hands and made a supernatural jump to the other end of the field. He threw the ball while in air, but he had jumped too high and it only hit the crossbar. This whole time I was already lucid, the dream had pretty much started that way.

The match ended up being more like Smackdown than any other sport. I was beating Cristiano up at some point. My buddy Tomi emerged from the woods and joined up in my side. I was pretty excited.

Unfortunately there isn't more that I remember.

I have surpassed my recall streak. I've recalled something on 29 days straight. Yay me. To be honest, I guess that's pretty pathetic record for someone in this for over three years. But it is what it is, and I gotta be happy and keep extending it. For LDs the barren streak still extends to 43 days. I've had over two months without a lucid, so it's not record, but with this decent recall I'd expect better from myself.

In terms of my past dreams we are going to October 2009. I guess I had already peaked after the first excitement of the 9 months prior and started to coast a bit, so my results were going down. Still, I had more success than now. Non-lucid this time though.

Everybody Knows You're Lost
Date: October 2nd, 2008
Lucid: No

I was at my home, in the living room. I was just chilling out before the windows started moving. It was really odd. I ended up looking outside the window and following some girls with my eyes. Then the dream transitioned so that I was now looking outside a bus' window to those same girls. Then I transitioned again, this time in the front of the small bus, alongside the driver who I knew. We started a conversation about cars.

I: "They don't make good cars any more"
Him: "What do you mean?"
I: "Well you know... For example, they don't start in the winter etc."
Him: "Oh yeah..."
I: "And all those microchips etc. so there's so many places that can fail."
Him: "Yeah but if they're not in use then it isn't a problem."

Surprisingly sane conversation. He, I mean the driver, was really hitting the throttle despite the fact that the bus was now in some kind of city centre. He said that he drove 100 km/h and I looked at the speedometer and it confirmed that. Pretty insane guy. There was some hill where the I felt the speed in my stomach. The driver steered into some parking hall, still at least a hundred in speedometer and then just stopped like he hit the wall - despite not hitting one. All the other people got off the bus like nothing had happened.

There was my old PE teacher and the other people went along with him. I started wondering what the hell I was doing in this bus anyway. I didn't reach conclusion, instead I just decided that going along with him wasn't it. I guess the bus wasn't going anywhere any more, as I went outside. By now the surroundings had changed and it seemed like some kind of construction site. My brother / my friend Henri emerged from somewhere - it seemed to change from moment to moment, which one it was.

I didn't have any idea, where I was, but I didn't want to admit that to my brother / Henri. There was some... what do you call those spots where's map of the city on a big board? Anyway, there was one of those and I walked up to it to figure out where I was, only to be disappointed. There wasn't any map, just an empty space.

All the sudden clown popped out of somewhere. A fuckin' clown! Well, I wasn't stingy about whom I ask for direction, as long as Henri / my brother won't know I am lost. So I walked up to the clown to ask for directions. Henri came behind me and asked: "LOL, is that your superior ?" (as in a job)
"No", I stuttered, "I was just about to kick him in the nuts."

It was weird line to say, I guess I was trying to be funny. We have a weird sense of humor, but that's just messed up thing to say. Anyway, you don't fuck around with clowns as he first kicked my ankle and then smashed his fist right in my face. I was down for the count and my brother / Henri walked me far from the clown.

It seemed like every time when the other side was nice, it was my brother, and every time he was mean, it was Henri. Makes sense.

I wanted to get back at the clown. Partly to revenge, partly to explain that it was just a joke and that I wasn't really going to kick him, and partly to finally ask him directions. Jesus Christ, just admit you're lost, haven't you endured enough trouble already? I was also thinking about pressing charges against the clown, as he had just beaten me up without me doing anything. My brother managed to talk me out of going at the clown again.

All the sudden we turned right next to my former school. I figured I was in the place I was looking for, so I forgot about the clown and didn't care to meet him again. My brother thought that I finally came to my senses and realized that I couldn't beat the clown.

Then the dream transitioned again and this time I was at my home again. My mom asked me whether I reached anyone. I guess I was to meet some people in the school, or something like that. Then the dream ended.

I've been a little lazy this past couple of days and have not been writing here. My recall is still slightly improving. God, I just wish my dry spell would end. I still need to try harder. Last night though I got decent recall, so here's the dream.

Chillin' In Korea
Date: January 28th, 2012
Lucid: No

I was just walking around in some bustling little asian town, that I just again "knew" was Korea. North or South, I didn't even wonder about that. I was walking around, watching the people going past me, looking at the buildings, just chilling out and feeling good. In fact, I felt like I could move to live in there.

All the sudden this orange truck stops beside me. Somehow I knew that it was Chinese. There were some soldiers and they asked me to get on board. I decided that why not, even if I felt a bit threatened and wondered if I have something to worry about.

In the truck's... what's the word? Let's just say "space in the back", anyway in there was some guy they were holding as prisoner. He was beaten and tortured. I noticed that once of my old army buddies was one of the three soldiers doing the dirty deed and one of them were my sister's boyfriend. Neither of them are really asian and they were just themselves in the dream as well, but for some reason Chinese soldiers as well.

So anyway I was angry about this man being tortured, but they just said that it wasn't against the law and it is what it is. Crazy shit law. I got really angry and in my mind I just rationalized "Well, if beating up a guy into a near death isn't illegal, then killing you isn't illegal either." Somehow I got an assault rifle on my hands and killed all of the soldiers.

At that point the truck was stopped in the middle of the woods, so I was in a perfect spot to get away with my murders. I grabbed the tortured guy on my shoulder and started running away. Most of the time it felt like the other guy weighted nothing, and finally the dream transitioned so that the guy was running along with me.

The environment had also transitioned. It looked like standard Finnish countryside. Some woods, some fields, house and barn here and there. We went across someone's yard and while the other guy got through unnoticed, some old woman spotted me. I tried to squirm my way out of it, but she wouldn't have it. I don't know what she could have done though, so why I just didn't leave? Anyway, the other guy saved me by saying something smooth and in the end we were welcomed inside their house.

We didn't stay for long, as we still had to continue fleeing from the authorities, who will surely eventually find the bodies and start tracking us down.

When that happens though, I'll be already awake.

Same old story with the recall, only fragments. I guess being biphasic at the moment is capping the limit of my recall. I'm staying asleep so short times that proper long dreams can't form. According to my Zeo Sleep Monitor my longest REM-periods happen a little bit after five hours, so it's no wonder that I'm not reaching my best with 3-4 hours at a time. I'll still keep this up, we'll see if it improves once I get more used to it.

In the meanwhile let's check back to one fucked up dream I had a while back. One that proves that being lucid and having a nightmare are not exclusive.

Killing My Mom
Date: July 27th, 2009
Lucid: Yes
Method: DILD

I don't remember what triggered the lucidity, but after confirming it with reality check I was semi-excited. I had read bunch of stuff back then about grounding the lucidity using touch, so I tried licking a screw that I found. I didn't notice any change in the quality of the dream.

Next I tried to put the living room's light's on as the dream seemed a bit dark. Obviously the lights wouldn't work. I called out my mom to put them on. I mean surely the dream character would manage to put them on? I don't remember what we exactly said to each other, but she didn't do it in the end. So I did the next best alternative. I started fucking smashing the lamps into pieces. I guess I am more random when lucid than normally in dreams. Surprisingly that was such a strong stimulation that it strengthened the dream. I think it also got brighter, ironically.

My mom got upset about the broken lamps though. This sent the dream into a downward spiral. Her negative emotions (that were actually mine, since this is my dream after all), made me angrier and I started venting it on the furniture, as I knew it was a dream. I don't usually smash the TV like I did then when I'm mad. No, really, I don't do that shit. So anyway mom started screaming at me for such behavior and I didn't want to hear that shit.

I went to my brother's room. There's a big window there. I jumped through the glass to get out. Yeah, I sure like destruction. Why take the door, when you can smash yourself through two layers of glass? I ran to the woods next to our house to get away. The atmosphere of the dream had turned into really dark and depressing. I was frightened and conscious of it. I knew that I had to get rid of the fear because I knew that it would affect the dream. Besides, what's there to fear, I knew it was a dream after all!

I tried joking around with my mom. I said to her that she is surprisingly agile for such considering how big she is (she is overweight). I guess that's not the best joke to say someone to calm him down in reality, but as it amused me and my mom was just a manifestation of my mind, that could have worked. But it didn't.

Confrontation was inevitable. The fight was short and I killed my mom with a simple hit on the head. I was relieved, but still thought how fucked up that whole thing was. Relief was only temporary though, as my sis came after me next and she wasn't happy. I was like "you gotta be kidding me?" Do I have to kill my family members one by one in a lucid? That's some fucked up shit right there. I tried to convince her to calm down, but I said the last words aloud in my bed, as I had woken up. Thank Lord.

I finally had enough recall to write about last night & day - that's right, it seems that my sleeping pattern has organically turned into biphasic. I don't mind, I've always been drawn to that kind of sleeping. I used to try polyphasing heavily back some time ago, but that didn't really succeed. Anyway, I'm still not fully satisfied with my recall. I remembered a lot, but for the most part it was just fragments. I'm going to write here the longest fragment.

Shootin' Cops
Date: January 10th, 2012
Lucid: No

I don't think I was in my own body in this dream, it was more like being in some charismatic dude's body. I don't know what I was searching, but I opened some kind of coffin and it tilted towards me, so that some stuff got all over me. It caused weird, tingling sensation in my body.

Then I transformed to our house's kitchen. There was some woman there. I told her about my sensations. She said that she needs to do something to me. She used an odd word that I didn't understand, so I can't exactly tell what she said. I feel that there was something supernatural going on there, like I've gotten some kind of curse over me from the coffin and she had to remove it.

She took my hand gently and held it and we had a beautiful, silent moment there. But it had to be ruined, obviously. The cops arrived to the house with their lights on and sirens howling.

Oh shit. My alter ego knew that he was in trouble. He stayed calm and picked up the lady. I was thinking like I was creating a plot twist, that "they must keep touching, or else whatever the woman was doing won't work." So on some level, I knew it wasn't real, but my brains wouldn't tell me what it was and I wasn't smart enough to realize it's a dream.

So now I was there carrying in the woman with my masculine alter ego body. I went to the back of the house and jumped out of the window with her, thinking that we'd could get away.

Not gonna happen. For some reason couple of police were laying on their backs in the backyard and got up immediately after I jumped down. They started firing at me. Brutal, they'll just fire at me despite me carrying an innocent civilian? Anyway I get a pistol from somewhere and start firing back. To my surprise I hit, and then I remember like I've read, that this guy is an excellent shooter. So it's a book now? Mkay...

After killing the first two cops the rest of them run behind me and keep firing towards me. Dream started fading, but I still remember that I wasn't hitting them anymore when the dream ended. I remember being frustrated, but not really scared - I still knew that it was something not real.

Again, recall was poor and only fragments, but I'm actually considering that kind of good - I only slept five hours, so remembering anything is pretty good after all. Tonight I'll go through one of my favorite dreams ever.

Gang Wars II: The Infiltration
Date: May 15th, 2009
Lucid: No

I was near one local place, basically equivalent of community center. I was one a backseat of a Mercedes as the car drifted past the community center. There's a school next to it and I was to infiltrate that area. Yeah, I was some kind of agent or something. My hometown was in some kind of gang warfare, that was what I intuitively "knew" about the situation It was dusk, I guess, since it was a bit dark.

There was some guy patrolling in front of the building. He had a pistol on his hand. He looked the Mercedes and seemed suspicious, but let it pass. The Mercedes turned to rowhouses that were next to the building, with some trees and field between them to block the sight.


I jumped out of the car and started moving within the thin trees and then over the field. My mission was to contact a mole that was working undercover in the ranks of the enemy gang, or something like that. When I arrived to the place, there was some other buildings beneath the community center that really aren't there,
but the area was a bit different anyway in the dream. I peeked around the corner of one of the buildings and saw some maintenance guy. I was about to shoot the guy with my silenced pistol, but then I realized that the place was crawling with guards.

The guards in general were youngish guys, where as maintenance guys - who were also everywhere - were basic, middle-aged men, just what you would expect. But what the hell could take so much maintenance?

I wasn't feeling very patient, so I hoped that darkness would cloak my movements as I sprinted out to the sight. I tried to make it between other buildings in the other side. For some reason it seemed like there was more light all the sudden and I was obviously seen. Fuck. Not quite as smooth as James Bond.

I realized that men behind me had certainly seen me already, so I was in a hurry. I continued running and ran into a guard that emerged from between the buildings. Instead of defending himself, the guy lifted his radio to call out the alarm. I shot him. Admirable (or stupid) to sacrifice your own life just to let others know that there is somebody uninvited in. Especially since I was already seen.

I continued my running from between the buildings. Now I had no destination - I was just running somewhere for the sake of running away. This time I met two guards at the same time! I shot one of the guys as I was running towards them. Instead of shooting me, the other guy picked up his buddy's pistol and extended his arm to give it to me. Now I can shoot with two pistols, I thought! I realized that this must be the guy I was looking for. Nice luck.

My mission was to contact him and probably to tell others as well what he said. Well I forgot it, so I guess that's mission failed. Anyway, I still had to get out of there alive.

I continued running and actually the next place I remember is in reality over a mile away from the community center, but I guess in the dream it was closer. I was running on the road by our neighbors and there was some tall guy on their yard - and of course some other gang members as well.

I raised the gun that I had gotten in the enemy's base and pulled the trigger. Click. What? There's no ammo in their guns? What the fuck? I think we are going to win this gang war. Anyway, my original pistol was still working, but my shots were scattering all over creation. There's a downhill after the house and I disappeared down it, from my enemy's perspective. Soon the tall guy ran behind me. He was at the top of the hill and pulled out a sawed-off shotgun. He started screaming after me:
"I'll take care of you! Like I did last time!"

So apparently this is a sequel. Shame that I didn't see the original, I guess it was awesome.

The guy started shooting at me. Instead of staying with my back to him and protecting the back of my head, I kept looking over my shoulder at him and then somehow put my hands in the x-shape in front of my face to protect it from the shots. Some shots still went through and hit my forehead, but they didn't cause serious damage. I didn't experience any pain. I saw myself from outside of me, like in a movie, and noticed that lines of blood were pouring down my face from the wounds the shots caused.

Dream started to fade, but it was near it's logical conclusion anyway. I didn't stay to fight the tall guy, instead I ran home and got away with it.

I've actually not yet gone to bed tonight. Or more like "tonight". It's already morning. So let's delve into another classic. This is a short one mainly because I'm lazy. The Formula One fans here will enjoy this one. I can imagine that there's like two of you in whole Dreamviews.

Michael Schumacher Formula One Showdown
Date: April 16th 2009
Lucid: No

So I was watching Formula One on tv. Schumacher, who at the time of the dream was retired, had made a comeback to the races (as he later did irl). Barrichello was his team-mate as had been in the real-life as well. Schumacher went to the pits and there was some trouble, but they managed to deal with it and get him back on the track.

Just as Schumacher exited the pits, Barrichello smashed right into him! Schumacher's car didn't seem that damaged, but Barrichello's car was obliterated. Despite Schumacher's car being seemingly okay to go on, he parked to the trackside. Instead he jumped out of the cockpit and headed straight towards Barrichello.

It seemed like Schumacher would go to console his team-mate, but instead he grabbed Barrichello, ripped him out of his cockpit and started beating the hell out of him!

That's it. Amazing scenes. It was amusing to me when I woke up and it still is.

Last night was underwhelming once again in terms of dream recall - or I should say last day, and I only slept 6 hours. I have been struggling to sleep at night and it's interfering with my recall. Compared to my usual recall this has not been at all worse though. I am still struggling in cultivating a habit of actually making notes of my dreams right after I wake up. I should just do it. On a brighter note I have remembered at least fragments on five days in a row. Probably doesn't sound much especially coming from a guy that has been into LDs for three years, but my record stands at mere 27 days in a row. I hope that I beat it come the end of the January.

So anyway that means that you're in for another "classic" dream. As always I'm only rewriting the lengthy or otherwise memorable dreams here.

Zombies vs. Christians
Date: March 5th, 2009
Lucid: No
I was playing some kind of a hack 'n' slash multiplayer game - except that in my dreams, games are never games but rather I'm really in their worlds. There were two sides - Zombies and Christians. Your standard match-up... not. I was fighting with a battle-axe and our team was fighting along some ramp, slaying our opponents. I was obviously on the zombie side as I'm so vehemently anti-christian.

The main group of opponents started coming up the ramp. There was some kind of fence on the ramp, but that would have been easily surpassed should they have wanted it - but I guess they didn't see us, as they went into some mansion through the door behind the ramp.

I followed them. Inside the mansion there were coffins. I presumed that there would be zombies inside the coffins, but no. The zombies were lying on the tables in the next room, where I noticed one of the Christians crouching and "defusing" the zombie with his cross. Similarly how the bomb is defused in Counter-Strike. WTF? Zombie Counter-Strike? I'd play that. It's a bit odd though, usually in games and movies zombies are just shot to pieces, not "defused" with a cross... Well, whatever. Anyway I was in control of these lying zombies. At some point they got up and started walking whenever I was looking.

I took something that look like a pancake, inserted it into my mouth. I needed to speak into it to command the zombies. I hadn't done that earlier because it would have given off my location. Now the room only had some woman with my zombie. I put it into my mouth and commanded... "Kill me." Oops. I don't know what brainfuck happened there, but even the zombie looked surprised. Then it started to walk towards me. "No no no, kill the woman", I corrected myself then.

The zombie took it's time on killing the woman and she didn't look at all happy about my command. She started walking towards me ominously.

I retreated outside, constantly repeating the command "kill the woman!" through the pancake, or whatever. The zombie and the woman kept following me. Once I was outside, some of my teammates, who for some reason were just idling outside, came to my assist.

All the sudden some guy comes up to the zombie and says that he is sick of it doing things so slowly. The guy kept talking and I don't remember what he said in between, but somehow he managed to shift the subject to some new law, that said that you couldn't play more than 250 hands of poker a day anymore. He told that it was frustrating, especially for a pro like him, given that he had to meet the betting requirements of bonuses etc.

I just looked at him flabbergasted. I had forgotten about zombies and all. The I collected myself and just answered: "I'm not obeying that law."

That's it, now to wait when the Zombie Counter-Strike gets published.