Xanous' Dream Journal

#445 - DEILD - 7:45AM

The Monday got me this morning and I just said to heck with it, I'll go in at 9 and sleep a little more.

I am dreaming and laying in some sort of box with dirt in it in the gutter. There's some tube running off of some part of my body to drain something out. I feel the worst depression I've ever known and I decide to just lay there until I die. I really want to die. The thought of it moving on feels like a great relief. Then, I think that I should at least try to get lucid while I am lying her and this partially wakes me up.

I focus on body relaxation and vibes start. I try getting out but it feels off somehow so I go more visual and find that I am walking in the house. I feel the presence of my wife or someone (but it feels like her energy) following close behind me but I can't see her. It's comforting. I step out the front door and all my depression drops away and is replaced with a feeling of bliss. The air is pleasantly cool and I am delighted that I had an OBE. It has been forever. There is a light snow on the ground and the dream is unstable so I roll around in it. I still feel my wife near me watching over me like a guardian. I love it. The birds are singing loud and clear and it is the most beautiful bird sound. Everything feels like heaven and I enjoy every second of this visually unstable dream. I soon wake up.

#210 - 7:05AM - DEILD

My wife wake me up around 6:30am when she leaving for work. I decide it's time to really take advantage of sleeping in and set my intentions. I try to WILD but I am still too tired. Later I awaken from a NLD that I can't remember and just try to DEILD.

The first thing I notice is the sound of the fan cutting out completely and then the shift from my physical body to my dream body. I feel completely ethereal and light. After that, I get the vibrations. I try my usual way of "physically" exiting bed but lately I just can't get that to work so I try visualization. I try running and it feels good but nothing will form. I try seeing the back of my eyelids but I notice the morning light too much. Then I try seeing my hands and it helps but not quite enough. Then, I realize that I am putting too much attention to the blindness. I let go of it and I see the top of a door way. I do a few chin ups on it concentrating only on the task at hand.

The dream clears up and I walk out the front door. I immediately feel the cold of the concrete on my bare feet. The air feels very cold and my upper-body becomes cold. I realize I am only wearing pants. I tell myself that it is summer and should be warm. The cold vanishes and I continue on. What will the dream bring me this time? I scan the neighborhood for anything unusual. Nothing really get my attention so I start jogging but at that moment I see out next-door neighbor's car and decide to drive. As I approach it, it morphs from sedan to van. I hop in and don't even bother trying to start it. I just grab the old steering wheel gear shift and slam it in reverse and hit the gas. When I get out of the driveway and slam it to drive, the car stalls for a second and dies. I refuse to believe it and I push the gas all the way down. After a moment I am speeding off through the neighbor hood.

I begin to think of a destination and wonder if I could drive to Hell. Along the way I see metal buildings with one marked "Hell" on it. I decide this isn't going to be good enough so I pass it by and think about the Great Wall of China again. The surroundings turn from busy traffic and commercial buildings to wide open countryside. I fell like I need to get off the road to find the Great Wall. I pull up on the steering wheel and shout, "FLYYYYY!" For a moment all I can see is blue sky and clouds. Nope, too high. Think hovercraft. The front of the car comes back down and dissolves. Now I am zoom flying over grassy fields and dense forests searching for the Great Wall. I am enjoying the speed and the low altitude flight when the dream comes to a halt. I then awaken in reserve order of the DEILD. Darkness, back to physical body, the fan returns, and I open my eyes.