Sasso0o

I had an LD tonight. I went to bed around 8:30 pm for a nap but it took me some time to fall asleep, and I woke up at 10 pm. I rarely have LDs at night, but my sleeping times are messed up currently anyway.

It started with some painful sensations like the last time but I was aware I was dreaming this time, and tried to get rid of them but couldn't but at least I knew they were not real, so I suffered less. Then I thought I woke up and realized it was false awakening and became conscious again, and false awakenings kept happening, probably 5 times. I tried to summon somethings each time, but it didn't always work. There was never a time enough to go with the flow and live a story or something but I had some fun in between them.

I remember in one of the false awakenings, I thought that my body moved in real life while spinning in the dream. I thought that because when I woke up (not really, just a false awakening) I found myself in a weird position and floating! and that sounded realistic to me at the time until I realized later I was still dreaming.

I was having trouble sleeping, and the last time I checked the clock it was past 8 am I and woke up around 9 am, so it wasn't a long sleep.

I was having a normal dream and I realized I was dreaming, I was excited but somehow I was floating over my bed unable to change my position. I almost always have full control over my body when I LD, but this time I had only control over my mind. I ignored that and tried to conjure something behind the door while floating over my bed and failed.

Then suddenly I was in my bed thinking I'm awake but I wasn't. I had very painful sensations.
I felt like a couple of balls are moving inside my skull, they were moving and crawling under my skin, and I was shaking badly.

I also felt hot air coming out of my ears. I can't remember every sensation now, but I was in so much pain and trying to fight it. I tried to move my body and it made things worse. It all felt so real but I think at some point I realized that it wasn't because I tried to snap out of it and I woke up.

It didn't feel like sleep paralysis because that's not how it felt in previous experiences but probably the same person experiences it in many different ways.

I failed to sleep after, and I am still awake with only 3 or 4 scattered hours of sleep in the last 34 hours .

I opened a discussion about it here including a previous recurrent experience.

I haven't had many LDs lately.

I didn't record the last 2 here because there were not much details, but I used my LD app on mobile to save the dates, April 30 and May 5.

For the April LD, I remember trying to run too fast, I probably turned to a wolf at some point running on four, but my memory is fuzzy now. I also recall asking questions that went unanswered for the first time, maybe because I said something and waited a comment instead of asking directly.

I don't remember anything about the May LD because I fell asleep after it, and my entry on the app says "Don't remember details" .

In the next post, I will write about my today's LD.

It has two years since my first two lucid dreams. I admit I wasn't trying enough and at some point I forgot the whole thing, but lately I decided to try again. I was trying DILD mainly although DEILD is what worked for me before, but it requires much luck, it is not easy to remember to stay still when you wake up before you make any move. Also I find WBTB difficult, I don't think I can relax enough, so I'm saving this one to later.

Anyway I watched dream signs and I could never commit to doing enough reality checks, but today I finally did it!!!
I'm so excited and I wanna write the whole story but some parts I don't remember accurately.

First, I got sick and took a permission to work from home today, but I still woke up at 8:30 am without an alarm from a non-lucid vivid dream, then I talked to someone at work who is leading the project I'm working in, and he said I don't have to work from home today if I'm sick, so I decided to take a nap and then decide if I will work or not. I woke up from the lucid dream around 11 am, so the nap was around 2 hours long. I mentioned the times because I had my last lucid dream during a morning nap too, so I'm guessing that's something I should try more often at least on weekends.

It was a DILD this time, no SP or any other kind of transitions which is totally new for me since I had SP the first two times.
I was having a normal dream that I don't recall with details now but I think it was kinda scary then somehow ended in a car going to work, and as I mentioned above I'm staying at home today in the real world and I was considering more than just one day working at home, so in the dream I started thinking "Why am I here? I'm not supposed to go to work, I probably should go back." (The reality check I was trying lately but couldn't commit to was the "How did I end up here" one. so I guess it worked ). Then I started to suspect that this wasn't real because I am sure I shouldn't be here. Anyway I arrived there and decided to do a check. I dunno why I didn't try the normal reality checks, but what popped to my mind was to try to test the taxi driver's reaction. My logic was that he normally has to get paid, so if I'm in a dream he probably won't care , so I opened the door, and got out without paying anything, but he got mad! and starting yelling at me. I paid him and somehow I realized I'm dreaming while I'm paying him, probably because I kept thinking "I'm not supposed to be here". I literally threw the money at him after I realized I'm lucid dreaming, and walked away fast.

At that moment I tried to control my excitement since my last lucid dream was so brief because I got so excited and touching the floor couldn't stabilize it back then. I walked to the middle of the street and started spinning (it was the first time I try this technique), it felt so nice and the dream got stabilized. I tried to change the scene with spinning but I saw only slight changes, like colors and so. I was trying to change the scene to something simple I always planned to try, a green big field and a black horse. That didn't work, but I decided to move on and not focus on it so much.

I walked around and ended up in some building. It had my bedroom which I wasn't sleeping in tonight, and many other different rooms that can't be in a house. Anyway I didn't try to control the surroundings, but doors led me to different rooms which I don't remember in detail now like when I wake up from a normal dream. I got in my bedroom which wasn't exactly the same, and decided to ask my subconscious some questions (I made the decision a while ago to try that first since it is easier than changing scenes).

I started with my first question which was something about jobs always getting screwed up for me, something always happens that makes it is too hard to stay. Anyway, my voice at first was low, later I could shout. When I asked the question, I got a cat thrown from the window, it was like an empty stuffed cat and I thought he/she would talk, but he/she did nothing. So, I asked again, and I got a real cat jumping through the window, and he/she talked to me. That was kinda scary at first but I listened. It was a low deep male voice, and the answer was cynical, something about how all people with talents should be screwed like that, but I don't remember the exact words now. The voice was low, and I asked the voice to repeat some parts, and it would only repeat the last part it said, never more.

I left the cat and asked another question which was about a risk I wanted to take. A business to start because that has always been my dream and because I am sick of working for others. This time the answer came through a phone, a traditional one. I didn't dial anything, I just held it, and I don't remember how it ended up in my hand. I got the answer with the same low deep male voice, and again it was cynical about how that would be a risk and if it would fail "that would be it for me" in my career. The same thing happened with repeating parts I didn't hear. I was walking around while talking, and noticed some teens around who were making noise and making it hard to hear, so I yelled at them "quiet", and that's when the voice stopped answering, maybe because I got distracted.

Anyway I got out of the room, and decided to try again to change the scene, but it didn't work and I woke up. I just woke up like from a normal dream, nothing special.

Conclusion and notes for me:

• Morning naps work for me
• How did I end up here reality check might be the best for me.
• I am much better at stabilizing dreams now, and spinning works! I also tried touching my body while spinning.
• I'm not good at control yet, I was in full control of my character in the dream, but not the surroundings or other characters.
• I hardly interacted with dream characters, only the teens I yelled at, and the taxi driver was before I realized I was dreaming. I was too focused on me, and didn't pay attention to other characters. I should try to change that.
• I dunno what the voice I heard was, but if it is my subconscious, it is so cynical and I don't think I want to talk to it again
• I need to read much about creating scenes and practice visualization more.