lumiina

9/17/14

7:15 am DILD

I was having a dream about fighting space creatures like in Gantz when I woke up from it into a false awakening. I tried turning on the light and it didn't work. That's when I realized I was dreaming and became lucid. My window shade was gon and I could see outdoors into the wilderness. I walked through the window. Everything was so crisp and vivid. Then I saw big foot. I was scared so I said こんにちは, "hello" in Japanese, to assure myself and it said こんにちは back. It was walking away from me and I followed it. Then it faced me. I was so scared that it wold turn me into a werewolf or eat me, so I shoved it on the ground. I felt guilty, but was still scared, so I woke up.

7/8/14

7:23am MILD 2x

I realized I was dreaming and went for the door. I was excited to go to Japan. I thought as I held the doorknob and started opening the door, not just Japan, but my mother in law's house and tried to picture it. But when I opened the door, it was just the hallway to my apartment complex. I realized I needed to go through the hall to the next door that leads outside. But I woke up.

Before this FA, I had two other FAs. In the first one, non-lucid, I woke up in a mix of my apartment and my mom's house. I helped my mom out a bit with the daycare by supervising a kid playing a computer game while sleeping on the couch, but when I saw my mom, reminded her, today's my day off and I need to work on my translation internship, so I went back to my room to get some sleep.

In the computer game, it was a kids game and I remembered being able to choose a side character that gives you advice. So I kept wanting her to choose the butterfly. Also, she was able to switch the language settings to have the side character talk in Japanese.

At some point I had another non-lucid, either before or after the FA, in which I was outside on a jungle gym type structure trying to climb it with lots of kids and young adults around doing the same.

In my second FA, I realized I was dreaming when a little boy, from that jungle gym dream, was in my apartment. My husband was in the bathroom in this FA. I tried using a window as a portal but just entered another FA.

6/20/14

8am

Woke up from alarm, brushed teeth, went back to bed.

8:47 am

DILD

I think I was in the bathroom and it was pitch dark. I knew I was dreaming. I tried shouting vivid or brightness, but it didn't work. I did flips in the air. I knew I ha to get up, so I either woke up at that point, or continued into a non-lucid dream, I don't remember which.

I don't remember the order of my dreams either.

non-lucid

I was on a boat getting to land and both a hammerhead and great white were trailing us. I was scared of falling off the boat. But we did make it to land.

Also dreamed of an Animal Crossing esque scenario in which the girl I nanny makes a creepy house.

And of a Japanese video machine. The boxes for the machine had Japanese on them. I couldn't get the videos to work and emailed my mother-in-law about it. She replied saying she should send me some videos in the mail and that the videos I had, which were from China, weren't good quality. At one point I changed the channel and a movie about sharks was on. A daycare kid was next to me and I quickly tried to change it as a giant shark jumped out in the movie.

Also, one of the videos available for the machine was an educational, animated video with Japanese sign language. I only saw the cover.

5/22/14

10:49 a.m. non-lucid

Dream my husband and I adopted a little boy while in Japan. At first he was ~3 yrs and needed a car seat, but then some point in the dream he was ~9 years old. Him adopting the boy made me feel like my husband finally accepted my fear of giving birth and wanting to adopt instead. I was a little worried what others would think, since we were young, but I already loved the boy.

Yoshi was driving, backing out of the parking lot, but I was telling him we need to put in his car seat first. Eventually we did and things were fine but I told him next time he needs to stop right away.

The little boy was actually born in America. We spoke both English and Japanese together. He looked either half or not Japanese at all, but had dark hair. I loved him as my own son. I wondered how to enroll him in school in America.

In the following dream I dream journaled the dream above and then transitioned into the next dream, which was also set in Japan.

In this dream, I was babysitting the girl I nanny while in Japan. During part of the dream, I was watching My Little Pony with the girl. Her father commented why are there only girls in the new generation of MLP. I commented back, you only say that because you're not used to women as rulers and the majority. He and the girl's mom laughed and he admitted that's true. The girl's mom says she doesn't get why young adults like MLP, and then comments at least it's better than the filth on Adult Swim. Then she apologizes and says, oh, but don't you like MLP. She asks whether I really like it or am sending a message through liking it. I was unsure how to answer, but thought in the dream both.

Earlier this morning, I had a non-lucid dream about a false awakening at my mom's. I recognized this and did a mantra when falling back to sleep that I am falling asleep in my room, so if I wake up anywhere else, I am dreaming.

Then, comes my MILD!

7:32 am MILD

False awakening lucid at my mom's. I hear the door bell ring and answer it. I know it's a dream because I remember I fell asleep at my apartment. It is one of the daycare moms at the door here to pick up her son, N. I see N, and another daycare kid, M, below me. I look down at M and try testing the gravity. I think he asks me what I am doing and I think I tell him I need to check the gravity because I'm dreaming.

Despite the fact that I know I'm dreaming, the dream feels so weird, it doesn't feel like a dream, except for the fact that I'm levitating. The way in which the dream characters are acting are how they would've in real life.

It takes a bit of effort but I manage to propel myself into the air and levitate after spinning. I see my mom and try to ask her 世界を変えることはできますか？ but the words are so hard to get out of my mouth. As I'm struggling to say them she asks, "What?" and once I finally say it she says, "Yes" very briefly and casually in English while looking the other way. She seems distracted by her own reality instead of paying attention to my lucid dream efforts. I'm not sure if she actually understood me.

I wake up because I don't feel fully asleep and am afraid to fall asleep and can feel my paralysis. I'm also afraid I won't be aware of my surroundings in waking life if an intruder breaks in.

After waking up and writing down my dream, I went back to sleep. I had many false awakening dreams in my apartment. I try to focus my brain away from lucid dreaming because at this point I just want to sleep and finally I fall asleep and have four non-lucid dreams.

One of the non-lucid dreams had Japanese Sign Language in it.

9:30 am non-lucid

I have a dream that a boy who knows Japanese Sign Language and who is deaf came to our daycare. He signs the signs for "sign language" "can" "can not do" "question marker" to me. I reply with "can" and am excited. His father however doesn't seem to know how to sign and could hear. I text my friend from the farm dream about how there's a little boy who's native language is JSL at daycare.

3/16/14

6:39 am non-lucid

Dream Part 1

For our class, we're given bamboo sprouts to plant in bottles. I love the idea, but am overall saddened that as usual my fine motor skills (or lack thereof) get in the way, and creates a mess. I try to explain this to my teacher, who is Chinese (resembles my East Asian history teacher a little, but not exactly her), but she doesn't understand and instead is disappointed in me for not trying hard enough.

We receive Japanese children's books. One of mine is from a segment on children's books I remember from Japanese TV (not in waking life) and I feel excited. I think to myself, we can use these for Tadoku (a foreign language reading contest), especially my Japanese language club members who are doing Tadoku for the first time.

I approach my teacher. Somehow I end up talking to her in Chinese, just a little tiny bit. I remember using the word "hanyu", which means Chinese language. I tell her I had a Chinese teacher who taught me a different subject (something related to Japanese and maybe Japanese sign language).

Scene transitions to a video in which you control where you want to go in the scene, like a video game. I remember this is the set for something with Japanese Sign Language and this must be how they made the films. As I realize this the film becomes clearer in vision to me as a dreamer, but grainy to my dream-self, artificial.

Before I join my "bamboo class", my teacher notices me from afar while I'm talking with someone else near the entrance of a room at the end of the hall. My teacher wants me to come to class, even though there should be a few hours before class left. When I get there, it's another class. I think math.

I have this worry mid dream that I'm not wearing underwear because I had to throw it away or put it away, but realize I am wearing underwear and am relieved.

Done writing dream at 7:19 am.

9:38 am non-lucid

Had a dream Mittens (my cat) was in my car. (Recalled triggered by hugging my other cat, Miitan.)

I wasn't so happy about Mittens being in my car instead of safe at home. She would escape many times when people would come into my car and I had to drive them around. Because I was parked at my home church with a large field, thankfully it was safer and easier to catch her than a busy street.

At one point I went to my mom's, where my sister-in-law was having her second wedding ceremony with my brother. But I missed it (though I didn't care to go, they're already married). She and others talked about how I missed it. Not mad at me, just teasing. I got so mad/frustrated, trying to explain that Mittens was in my car and I had to drive people around all day, but they just wouldn't understand. I yelled and screamed.

I realized Mittens was still in my car and imagined her lonely and thought it may be dangerous for her to be in the car that long. Thankfully, my dad came to me and said he took her back to my place (I think) and I was relieved.

3/16/14

6:39 am non-lucid

Dream Part 2

I overhear a school's presentation in another class after hearing Japanese coming from the class. I decide to join in and watch and the scene transitions to outside at a Japanese concert with Japanese music. I find my friends and cheer. Then, it goes back to the classroom, in which I'm cheering for the presenter.

Not sure if this was the same presenter, but one of the presentations is about Conan O'Brien. Student dresses up, looking like Conan, has red hair. After the presentation I bump into him on the way to the parking lot and congratulate him. I'm charmed by him and almost forget that I'm headed to the wrong parking lot, supposed to be going to a satellite parking lot further away.

The guy is actually some sort of witch that kills its victims when he gets them to go back to his hotel with him. He is male, but has a evil female presence. I realize this. My friend is worried about me, but I tell her not to worry, I broke away and left for my car.

Somehow we do end up at the hotel. Me, my friend (female), my husband and that guy. I remember my love for my husband to avoid getting charmed by him, but I'm worried for my friend. All of the sudden, we're running from him and we go down to the basement (my mother's) to escape, but it's too late for my friend. She tells us to go, she'll hold him off. Her fingernails dig into the archway of the entrance to the basement stairway. He gets to her and kills her. This is when she comes to the realization of what the presentation really meant. Conan O'Brien was just a cover. The aspect of wanting to see him stood for loss, mourning and missing one's loved ones who have passed away.

This dream didn't make my heart pound or terrify me, but I still think it's a nightmare because I'm left creeped out, lingering into my waking life.

Was scared to go to the bathroom alone after I woke up and brought my husband with me. Scarily enough, the mirror to the medicine cabinet was open! I had him close it.

I also had this feeling towards the end of the dream that my own fingernail was digging into my skin (I don't know if it actually was in real life) and needed to wake up to stop it.

3/12/14

3:10 am non-lucid

Zombies. Eventually we have to live downstairs in a basement to escape (or be kept away from). We seem to have been infected, but it's not so bad.

Atmosphere transfers from dark to comedic. I, as Lesley Knope at one point, am called back to the above ground, but in a protective suit as not to infect others, in order to feed someone who won't eat. (Maybe he was infected, not us?)

Wasn't always Leslie Knope, just at that point. Comedy montage music playing in the background.

Before that point my husband and I am in the basement with another couple.

Some sort of analogy to Japanese language learning blogs and my job at JALUP. Tofugu included.

One of our cats in the basement with us.

We're hiding in the basement. Dream didn't start off in the basement, but I don't remember point before basement.

Playing board games till 6pm with another girl who loves games. This brings on the talk of Japanese learning blogs. She works for Tofugu.

3/6/14

The following is all one dream and did make sense as one cohesive dream when I woke up. However, I was too tired to write all the details so just wrote the highlights. Now looking back at it, these look like all kinds of mini-dreams, when they all originally worked together as one plot. I'm happy I at least wrote the main points down though.

I also remembered that aquatic animals is another dream sign of mine.

8:15 am non-lucid

Dream with Japanese Sign Language in it.

Scene with aquatic animals and non-aquatic animals.

Someone is after my family.

High school reunion, my close friend from the farm dream and someone from my home church are there, even though they didn't attend my high school.

A classmate of mine from Japan tried to get me to memorize a Japanese Christian song so covers my eyes when I sang.

I meet a Deaf person who only knows ASL and a hearing person who is learning ASL and JSL. I try to sign with the Deaf person, but since I only know JSL, can not communicate. Eventually, I turn to writing down what I want to say. I'm worried he thinks I am making up signs when it's really a different language. I suppose I was just showing him I know a sign language too and it's nice to meet him.

February 23, 2014

3:33 am non-lucid

I had a dream that I went to Japanese camp to teach, but when I got there together with my husband who was dropping me off, I was having second thoughts. I didn't want to be away from my husband for 2 weeks, no cell phone contact. So I had to confront my employers, who knew me since I went to Japanese camp as a teen. There was a Chinese male and a white female. Went to the back room offices to talk. At first small talk, but the Chinese man could tell something was wrong. I hugged him at one point since it's been a while since I've seen him. When I mentioned how I didn't think this was going to work, he said not all marriages work out. Then I said hold up, no, I'm talking about the job. We were confused over the word pre-meditated, or a word similar to that, which caused the misunderstanding. The word's definition in the dream eluded to something not working out, not the definition in waking life. He told me to reconsider working there and how it is only two weeks and my Japanese would improve a lot.

The lighting was very dim, like nighttime throughout the dream. I remember going out and reminiscing over the camp. Then I went over to a bunch of children's books that were about mythical native American or Inuit creatures in the snow. Theme of heritage, culture being passed down. I read one of the books, which had a theme of pride in one's culture. The book had a few foreign words in it, but not in Japanese. It could've been a book about the same content, but in Japanese, yet it wasn't. I didn't understand why.

Before I confronted my employers, there was another worker in the dream who when found out about the cell phone rule, also felt she couldn't do that. She was short, I think her hair was pulled back, dark hair. Not a language employee, instead another kind of staff. Her face kind of resembled my piano instructor's. She was encouraged to speak up after hearing that I wanted to and has a husband too. She's older than me.

I remembering arguing to the Chinese man that if only my husband could work that summer too, but couldn't because of his job, implying that he should hire him and pay him to solve things.

When contemplating, I was leaning my head on a wall or pole.

I was having second thoughts before we even left to go to the camp, which is states away, but still decided to drive there with my husband.

I felt sad to be conflicted. Loved Japanese camp so much, but had to choose between keeping my marriage strong (which could end up fine even if I did work at the camp) or working at a place I loved and grew from. Reminiscent, though setting not at all like the actual camp, as usual in dreams.

The white lady resembled my TEFL (Teaching English as a Foreign Language) instructor, who is pregnant in waking life and pregnant in the dream. Dream was in English and non-lucid.

I woke up with a song from Animal Crossing: New Leaf playing in my head. I immediately realized I had a dream when I woke up, wanted to record it and jumped to my dream journal.

Time after writing down this dream: 4:01am.

Mantra: 夢を見ることを分かっています (I will realize I'm dreaming) 野原に風で空を飛びたい (I will fly in a field using the wind)

I had asked my husband if he has had a flying dream before, and he said yes, many times. He recalled one in which he was being caught up by the wind in a field and flying really high. So I imagined using that method to fly.

4:07 am Haven't fallen asleep
4:15 am Still not asleep
4:40 am Still not asleep

6:02 am

Dream 1 MILD

I realize that I am dreaming and check through the thumb/palm RC. I am so excited to confirm my thoughts that I am dreaming by seeing my thumb go through my palm. I try to jump so that I can levitate/fly, excited that I am lucid dreaming, afraid to be short on time. The gravity is definitely not normal and I kind of float through the air as I jump, but I don't exactly get far off of the ground. This is probably because I'm inside a building.

Before I become lucid, my dream is set in my apartment at night and I feel there has been an intruder. The intruder is female and I could hear her have a phone call in Spanish and sing from my bed. My husband and I are both in the bed and I try to alert him but he doesn't really think there's any threat and just goes back to sleep. I am extremely afraid and I think at some point my husband does leave the bed and is harmed, but the scenario resets itself. I eventually realize I am dreaming and next to my bed practice jumping.

The dream is in English and was induced with MILD. Along with saying my mantas about flying, I also was a little paranoid about an intruder, though I tried to push the thought away.

Dream 2 non-lucid

I was heading towards a babysitting job for a Japanese family. When I met the mother, she talked to me in Japanese and I replied in Japanese, though I didn't remember any of the dialogue. She lived in an apartment.

I remember walking down the hall to the apartment and seeing her neighbors, who aren't Japanese. Her neighbors were intimate and I remember it being embarrassing to witness, but I don't remember what happened. I think their bathroom was in the hall and one was using the toilet, yet with no shame of being in public and still smiling and waving.

This was non-lucid.

I think I might've woken up in between the 1st and 2nd dream, or if not consciously thought in between the dreams that I need to write down my lucid dream before I forget, but instead moved onto a 2nd dream.

Time after writing down these dreams: 6:22am

February 22, 2014

6:15 am
Woke-up remembering scary or mystery themed music from my dream and not remembering much else. Felt like another thought process dream in which I am just thinking, like in real life, but when I wake up forget what I am thinking about. The notes went lowest note - highest note - second lowest note - second highest note repeating again and again. It didn't feel special enough of a tune to go to my computer to record the exact notes, and I don't remember the exact tune anymore.

Got up, brushed teeth and hair. Went back to sleep.

Mantra: 夢を見ています　(I am dreaming.) すごい夢を見ています (I am dreaming an awesome dream.) 嬉しい気持ち (happy feelings).

I thought maybe if I did my mantra in Japanese, I would dream in Japanese. I've had dreams in Japanese before.

7:08 am Haven't fallen asleep.
7:45 am Still not asleep.
9:59 am Just woke up.

3rd Dream - Part 2
Had a dream about Japanese school life (second time since watching the drama Limit). All of my classmates are Japanese, including me. I'm not really in the dream, seeing through a different girl's perspective. We're all at a restaurant. Then the police come to say there's been a murder. My friend, a guy, and I try to run to the back and escape because we're scared, but we end up sitting down at our table with our other friend, a girl. We learn that the murder has been committed by our other friend, who is often bullied. She killed her parents. I'm so shocked and wonder why. If she could kill her parents, she could kill her friends too. I can now picture her face clearly at this point in the dream. She's not really there, just my dream self remembering what she looks like. She looks like the manga artist from the drama Limit. I also remember being sad for her. I hear her screaming in my head, "来なくて" (go away) again and again, through it is grammatically incorrect and should be 来ないで. I run to my friend, a guy, sitting at another table. His presence feels like Ron Swanson from Parks and Rec. I hug him and he comforts me. Aside from that one line, the dream is in English. It wasn't scary, more like a movie. Last scene, we are leaving the restaurant in a car and I remember seeing a police van and wondering if our friend is in there.

3rd Dream - Part 1
Before this dream changed into a murder scene. I remember mixing a drink at the table with my friend, a girl. The presence is the same girl who was at the table in Part 2 of the dream. At this point we don't have distinguished ethnicities and I am myself. The drink was an orange-colored smoothie. We came to the idea that we want to pour orange-colored cough syrup in it. It tasted disgusting, like curdled milk. The cough syrup absolutely ruined the smoothie, separating the fruit juice from the cream, turning it a gray color with lumps. We realized it was a bad idea.

2nd Dream
My mom and the girl I nanny and her family. My mom wanted to plan some sort of event. I was in my mom's kitchen at one point and Nila's living room at another point. I asked my mom at one point if she was going to cook for the event, perhaps turkey. She had eating out/bringing in food from outside more in mind. I suggested a specific restaurant, but she didn't like the idea.

**Note: I know the name of the specific restaurant and wrote it in my physical dream journal, just leaving out that detail since it might reveal where I live.

1st Dream
I might've been at school. Hallway, elevator. Perhaps Japanese club. I think a presence like Michael Scott from The Office might've been there. Group of people.

All dreams were non-lucid. By the time I finished writing down my dreams it was 10:24 am.

Reflections: I want to meet the girl who looked like the manga artist from Limit (dream character) while lucid. I have a lingering feeling of wanting to know more about her.