Dream Dream Dream Dream Dream Dream

Hehe I woke up like "aw I didn't dream anything" and then it all came back to me in a flash yo. Hmm I liked this oonee...
Let's see, I want another color for low-level lucidity, 'cause I do neato things when I'm like that and I wanna encourage it. Uhhmm.
Testing.

The Dream In Question (Lucid #2)
Yo okay this is gonna be loooooong. Also I know I'm forgetting some details but the durned things won't line up so screwit.

Basically I dreamed humanity was in some vast war with these frickin' space dinosaurs. The space dinosaurs also had those tan, humanoid Star Wars droids on their side, which they'd built and programmed. I was the son of the general who led the entire human resistance (though I think at the start of the dream I either was, or wanted to be, just another regular soldier). We were positioned behind two massive walls, with a fairly large gap between, occupied by shells of former buildings on either side of a vast street, very post-apocalyptic; the dinos would pour over the first wall and we'd light 'em up as best we could to prevent them from reaching the second wall. Directly behind that wall was the general's (and my) house, which also functioned as a sort of meeting place for the media and government. My dad kept them all close as a necessary part of the war effort. He had all his bases covered, it seemed.

So that day there were two waves of dinosaur attacks I think. Oh also I could fly, despite not being particularly lucid. I guess I was sort of lucid but not enough to plan anything or go for dream goals; just enough to try to manipulate the dream a bit and perform unrealistic shenanigans such as flight. Good times. (Flying wasn't a normal thing in the dream either, it was just how I chose to get around.)

So the first attack I remember flyin' my way towards the middle of the map, and oh man it was great flying. I remember drifting down like it was slow motion, skidding a few feet along the ground despite my light landing, and the physics just felt really really GOOD. I don't even know what the deal was but it was amazing. I'm gonna figure out how to fly like that it felt fantastic.

Then I presumably did some dinosaur fighting, though I can't recall the details, which is a real bummer. I DO remember the way the dinosaurs would approach: the frickin' pterodactyls gliding in ranks overhead, the brachiosauri looming in the distance with smaller dinos in the lead. Fairly picturesque, I just wish the quality had been a bit better. But a striking image all the same.

Hmmm we held off that attack fairly well. The next one though, I started behind the wall again, but this time I couldn't find a weapon. I made my way to the building on the far side of the first wall. There were media peeps in there I think, despite it being a shell, walls and windows blasted out; I guess that was where they shot footage from. Also had weapons right under 'em on a lower floor. I tried to get a sniper rifle from there (I remember another soldier making off with one) but I couldn't seem to get one. I thought it might've been because I was the general's son.

Notwithstanding this problem I headed out into the battle and probably accomplished just absolutely nothing at all. Absolute zip. Then the general noticed I was there (close by the first wall) and pointed out a droid that was about to cross the finish line tower-defense-style. I tried to sprint after the thing so I could take it out, I was gonna snap its skinny neck with one hand (dream powerrrzzzz) but I couldn't even catch up to the dang thing before it blooped through the finish line. Then the general pointed out ANOTHER one, a bit closer but still just a bit too far away (how had these singles droids gotten through everything?). I sprinted after it, and this time looked away from it so I could sort of catch up to it, like sneak up on it more quickly than I could if I were staring at it the whole time (dreeeaaam poweerrrzzz), but I still couldn't catch up. The general was equal parts angry and disappointed, but I was pretty mad at him myself. I told him if he'd let me have a gun, I would've been able to stop them easily. He didn't deny it, so mystery solved.

Then it was nighttime and we'd all retired to the house behind the wall. The general was keeping tabs on the media and strengthening his ties to the government, making sure he had their support and all that. Meanwhile I was wandering around, went into a bathroom and stumbled upon a girl taking a bubble bath. I didn't leave right away, 'cause I was looking for somethin' (and you'll never know what it was), and meanwhile she gave some speech about how our sense of privacy was, in these times, only an illusion. Something to do with the changes the general had put in place. I could sort of see her point but I didn't feel like dwelling on it too long.

I wandered into another bathroom, which looked like the one from my IWL house (2nd floor), except right by the lightswitch was a little screen, maybe 6 inches across, that was blaring some sort of propaganda. Not exactly the untruthful kind, though. It was showing footage of three unarmed soldiers being ripped apart, screaming, by a couple of the droids (who seemed to be having a good time). Lotta blood and guts. The lesson was "these dinosaur guys sure are the worst." I watched it rather morosely, though for me the main connection was "hm, that doesn't seem far removed from how humans used to treat each other back in the earlier wars." I was kinda cynical about that stuff. Part of it was probably just good ol' teenage rebellion against my parent (pretty sure I only had the one).

And speaking of that guy, he started makin' really awful coughing sounds and presumably dying right then and there. While a few people attended to him, I wandered outside (he was in good hands and I was a terrible person). Now I was in the front yard of the house I currently live in IWL, at night.

Just then my IWL parents pulled up in the street, lookin' a bit wild-eyed for some reason. By this time I had somehow grasped it was a dream (no reality check though) and had decided to forge my own path. Also said somethin' like "I'm dreaming" just to confirm.

I took off flying up to the roofs across the street (in the background my parents took off again) and explored a bit. Then I sensed that the house below me belonged to some meditation specialist, and I decided to try to dig my way through the roof to get inside. At my touch, the roof split into 2x1 giant foam lego blocks, which divided into even smaller blocks upon further handling. These shenanigans may have distracted me from my goal a little, as I found myself digging through several layers with no sign of getting through her presumably-3-foot-thick ceiling. I'm pretty sure I woke up soon after.

Not the most lucid I've ever been (it didn't occur to me to perform powers from the competition) but it still feels pretty good, yo. Hasn't even been two weeks since I started this journal and I'm well on my way, hohohoho *evil laughter*.

Sleepy yo. I had some dreams and then woke up naturally at 3 am, which was two hours before when my alarm was gonna go off. I didn't wanna get up and write 'em down considering I'd be doing that in another two hours so I tried to like, remember what they were, sorta fix 'em in my memory.

At first 40 minutes passed in a flash while I was doin' that, then it seemed to take forever just to get to 4:12 am. By the time the alarm went off it had (1) felt like an eternity had passed and (2) been long enough for me to fall into a deep sleep finally, which was then interrupted. BLAGH.

Aiight lemme do this real quick so I can sleep again let's see here

Fragment 1
Dreamed I was in some kinda MMO game, didn't have too much of a purpose. Just lots of people floating around. Pretty pleasant place, large open area with some kinda old frigate-looking ship-thing floating in midair and a nice background sky. Sort of an artificial feeling.

Then some big ol' hole opened in the sky over the ship, and some people headed through; the quickest ones, or those who'd been expecting it. My bro and I made it, and now we were in Level Two. Hard to remember any details, I just remember the two of us finding a place to chill and being joined by perhaps five others. We all shared the same interests so that was pretty cool. I suppose the whole thing coulda been a visual description of the internet, and people with shared interests chillin' together could've represented a forum of some kind. At least that's what the impression I got mid-dream.

Fragment 2
I was doin' my video editor thing, except the changes I made in the editor affected real life, such as it was. They were canon changes, you might say.

I think the story may have been about a (Dr McNinja-inspired) female gorilla takin' out attackers. Or failing. Depended on my editing.

Fragment 3
Seemed to have two dreams, one right after the other, with either a real or false awakening between. Apparently, at the start of both I'd gotten lucid, thanks to my brain trying to help me out. However, it wasn't real lucidity, just dream lucidity (aka you dream that you're lucid but you actually aren't, it's just a dream aspect, like having super strength without being lucid). And they both only lasted a few seconds. Also, at the time, I was picturing the DreamViews forum competition (#17) like "O IM LUCID DAT'S 5 POINTS". But nah man. Ain't countin it. Felt more like sleep math.

*this is where I woke up at 3 am*

Fragment 4
Dreamed I was in the kitchen of our current house blastin' two dirty dishes with hot water and idly contemplating what I would say if a certain ex-friend reappeared and said "hey, it's [name]". I'd totes be like "I don't have a friend called [name]". Hehehehe. The water physics were pretty realistic too how nice.

ARRIGHT managed to sleep after that and nothin' further bad happened which is good. I suppose as a rule, as long as I'm not still shaken up by whatever nightmare I had it's safe to go back to sleep. Yayyy~

Writin' this down at 4 PM, already got it memorized I suppose, CHECK DIS RECALL. (PS: one thing I do to aid recall is write out a quick outline with all the important details I remember, but I erase it when I'm done 'cause it's just for me, yo, it's lazy writin'. Example: "there was some kinda crazy mother figure who knew all our secrets and now we were in a house instead of a building and she totes (1) spilled the beans on my secrets and (2) despite being huge, could stretch herself to reach her limbs into any part of the house")

Dream 1
Arright so first of all I dreamed I was mercy-killing praying mantises. And praying mantises are my favorite bug so this was fairly traumatizing. Also I believe I was in the 1319 house again, in the dining room, though it may have kinda switched to the current house at times.

We had three mantises that were chilling on the dining room table, or at least we HAD three at the start of the dream. Mom had helped collect them, I believe, but the issue was that pretty soon the larger one was eating the smaller ones. They were all light green, and close to the same size, but the strongest and largest of them had some pretty powerful killing intent that obviously helped motivate the murders. It was actually pretty sad because once the larger mantis grabbed one it was pretty hard to free the smaller one, and then it was just helpless watching while the larger one tried to eat the smaller one's face, and the smaller one sort of tried to do the same, but generally failed.

I think there may have been in the end, far more than two murders, as though the dream were replaying the scenario a bit. Also it got a bit darker at times, with the smaller mantises ending up badly mangled or being dragged to their doom by the larger mantis grabbing onto a mangled claw of the smaller one, or eating the abdomen and nothing else, which is about when I started mercy-killing the smaller mantises. I only did this twice.

Hrm. Basically I took a rather powerful pair of scissors and cut the smaller mantises' heads off so they'd stop suffering, since they clearly couldn't survive without an abdomen. It was sort of a weird feeling because although they should've had little weeny necks, the sensation was like cutting through flesh ... yeah I'm freaking myself out now, along with probably a few other readers.

Anyway it was a fairly bad dream, but there wasn't too strong a sense of sadness and helplessness, and performing the mercy killings wasn't too traumatizing either. So that was alright I guess.

Fragment 1
Something about a golf range. Yup, that's all I got.

Dream 2
Man this one is much larger. Let's seeee...
First of all I was in some large building that I suppose I would describe as being some kinda museum. There was one of them theater exhibits near where I started out. Got the sense that the museum opened out onto the city, too bad I never got to check it out.

I had a group with me, companions of some sort. I would describe our relationship as... "friends by necessity", like perhaps members of a group project in a class, but while we were overall neutral there was a certain subtle warmth from them, which was nice.

NEXT THING WE KNOW WE'RE SURFIN ON THESE WAVES THAT'VE HALF-FLOODED THE FIRST FLOOR OF THE PLACE. Neat. It was actually more of an intentional wave sim than the product of some natural disaster. Still pretty dangerous though. I think we all had boogie boards, sort of official ones that probably all looked the same, and we were mostly just trying to not get crushed or torn up by these massive waves. Man they were huge. And they had this way of sort of sneaking up on you, where at first you were thinking "oh okay it's only rising to approximately THAT height, I should be fine," and then you'd hear shouts of alarm from your companions and realize it was not only still building but also about to crash down directly on top of you unless you dove under it. It was like that. They weren't too bad to deal with though. Note: no idea if I could breathe underwater, didn't have to deal with actually being underwater.

Kay next thing I remember is that there was this uh, scary "mother" figure who was sort of like, omniscient and could squeeze herself into anywhere. Which was surprising because as I recall she was rather large, not in the overweight sense so much as the "large and spiderlike with limbs that can contort" sort of sense. But other than that she wasn't scary. Pretty much a normal suburban sort of mother with extendy limbs and a habit of gettin' all up in one's business.

Speaking of which, that was the very first thing she did. (DAGNABBIT I OUGHTA FINISH WRITIN THIS THING ALREADY ITS TAKING ME AGES.) Uh. The very first thing she did was start gettin' all up in my business. I was sitting between these two ... box things, with a wall behind me and her in front of me, so I felt a little boxed in. OH GOODNESS I DIDNT MEANT TO MAKE THAT PUN. Too late now.

She mentioned somethin' factual (IWL, no less) and somewhat embarrassing about me, and I was just like "yup, that's true" because I wasn't letting her get under my skin. Then she started talkin' 'bout who I was dating, asking who it was, boy or girl, whether they were gonna cheat on me... I threw her a bone, tried looking legit upset by what she was saying just so she'd THINK it was working (I'm a terrible liar though so it looked super fake), then pointed out that my IWL boyfriend would never cheat on me. (#links 2 reality, check this sicknasty conscious decision making. just what I wanted~)

Next scene we were in some crazy house that I'd never been to before, which was PRETTY COOL. New houses are interesting. Also relevant to my life since it turns out we're freakin' moving again, but I didn't hear about that until today so idk draw your own conclusions. I'm a crappy psychic or whatever.

The scary mother with the bendy arms had no trouble navigating this (three story) house. She could send her hand to any room she pleased, or her foot if she so chose, and could see what was going on anywhere even if her face wasn't around. I recall being in some carpeted room on the third floor that I liked, seemed sunny and lived-in, loads of junk everywhere, looked like some not-quite-teenage girl must've resided there. Past tense, I don't know what happened to her. Maybe she was just away.

Anyway I was chillin' in there looking at all the mess and I realized the mother was lookin' for "us" (idk who else was with me) and saw her hand (with painted red nails) snaking its way into the room to grope at me or whatever. I was chill with that too. Not actual groping, you perv. She was being grabby but I was putting it up with it, I think that's mostly how I am in dreams. I let things happen to me. You'll see later, I'm sure. #crappy psychic.

OK and lastly the only other thing I remember is that at some point I was playin' some kinda game with my bro. We were younger than we are in reality and maybe it was a flashback, though a false one since the game and house were different from those IWL. Some kinda two-player video game, or something that two peeps could enjoy easily even if only one was playing. Something like that.

OKAY AAHHHH FINALLY DONE.

Had an episode of nightmare SP while on my side/stomach, which seems kind of unusual. Also first time I've had SP. Bleuch.

Dream 1 - Dream SP?
Started out with me dreaming I was in a grocery store with Andrew at like, 6 am, so maybe it counted as a false awakening? The grocery store was mostly deserted. Then I was trying to walk normally but I kept sort of falling into a crouch or to one knee. I couldn't seem to stand up, not for longer than a few seconds. I had the impression it was because of the shoulder-strap bag I was carrying, maybe it was way, way too heavy.

Anyway before all that happened it was just a nice 6 AM grocery store visit. I also got the impression that nearby was an older couple who visited the grocery store at 6 AM as a nice little custom of theirs, before other people were around. And also I was trying to find a nice jug of apple cider, but I kept running into the storebrand stuff, which was kinda watery looking and bleh.

Then I started having trouble staying up, like I was just too tired, and the bag was too heavy. I made continuous and valiant efforts to rise, but even when I could stand up, staying standing was impossible to maintain. I think it kept getting worse, but before it hit that point I ran into some older dude who chatted me up and then invited me to his and his wife's divorce ceremony; she showed up around when he was saying that and I noticed two rather recent-looking scars on the back of her right wrist. It sort of looked like a failed suicide attempt. I determined that the older dude was Pretty Terrible.

At some point the mp3 player in my bag started going off. I don't know what song it was playing. I started digging through my bag looking for it, but even this was difficult; I was not only weak, but uncoordinated. Also, around this point Andrew had been replaced by Ben, who I spotted wandering away from me, and following him was impossible. I think I called after him. Probably some sort of striking metaphor for coolkids goin' to college. And the random peeps around me didn't seem to notice that I was in need of assistance. It was all pretty weird.

Uhhh I think I woke up briefly and then slipped into a nightmare.

Dream 2 - Nightmare
Bleuuuhhh I don't remember much of this, except the traumatizing part. It was basically like watching a movie. Trigger warning: rape, etc.

*siiigghhh* okay all I remember is that the movie was cutting back and forth between two different groups, one of which was two businessmen, and the other one being, idk, a woman and her friends ?? so I really only remember a couple cuts before it got dark. It cut from the female group to the two guys in an elevator, one being some guy who'd been around in the company longer but maybe wasn't much older than the other guy and was probably a psychopath and wore glasses, and the other being some dude who was pretty similar but did not wear glasses and I'm not sure how to describe their characteristics. Then a cut to the woman and her friends goin' out in the dark to party or coming back from a party, idk. And then just this fricking cut to the glasses psychopath raping the other guy, who was pinned down, gagged, and making pitiful noises that have thankfully slipped my memory, while the glasses psychopath was talking like this was perfectly normal or doing some sort of villain monologue. My brain flipped the frick out like "what he must've chloroformed the guy oh no him being alone in the elevator with him was such a mistake I want to wake up now", and then I think I was awake.

dat SP tho
So I was awake (though still mentally only half-awake) and still traumatized and wanted to just kinda get up, but I couldn't move. It didn't really occur to me that this was a huge issue. I think I was just waiting for my body to move. I was on my stomach with my head turned to the right looking at my desk, and the edge of the bed was right next to me. So, when it became clear that my body was not going to move, I decided that I was just going to roll off the edge of my bed and wake myself up. These calculations were all done while I was still half-awake, and some part of my mind was processing the whole not-moving thing in a fairly analytical way that (for the moment) staved off panic. (Also, realistically, there wasn't really room for me to roll off the bed, and I would've probably hit the desk and ended up awkwardly wedged between it and the bed frame to some degree, but at the time that seemed a reasonable risk and/or I felt invincible, like I was still dreaming, and/or my view of the floor was a bit skewed so it seemed like I should've been able to land without injury. Presumably the same part of my brain that jumps out dream windows was managing things.)

My plan to roll off the bed failed as I continued to not be able to move. It didn't feel like being pinned down. It sort of felt like being too ill or tired to move, which for some reason felt familiar, though no real reason for that comes to mind. I still wasn't panicking, just sort of continuously sending signals to my body that it should roll off the bed.

Then, all at once, fear rolled over me and I started hyperventilating through my nose. I got the impression that if I looked over my shoulder, I'd see a demon on my back. I looked back (I could only move my eyes) and seemed to glimpse darkness; not the absence of light but something that entirely defies light. At the same time, there was a building roar in my right ear, and something like a demon voice laughing or making some kinda weird noise, not actually speaking, and maybe some third louder noise, and then it all just snapped off like a light switch.

I can't clearly remember the line between being paralyzed and suddenly not being paralyzed. Looking back it seemed like I started getting up the second I was able to, though not in a panicking way (wasn't hyperventilating anymore either). The fear had been temporary and sort of artificial, as if it was just sort of The Thing To Do in that instance, which is reminiscent of other nightmares. I suppose the reason for that is that realistically, there isn't much for me to be afraid of. If I'm afraid of something in a dream, it's because I'm supposed to be, but I don't really have a death phobia in dreams so that lends a sort of invincibility. Bahhhh I can't explain it. I'll try again later.

Huh. I don't recall a dang thing. Maybe there's a fragment about Ben and some kinda boss dude but it's almost more of an impression than anything ...
Might start going for 5 hours instead of 6. Time to WILD. *yawwwnnn*

WELL WELL WELL.

Lucid Dream #1
Note: I've had lucid dreams before, but only a few. I'm starting at 1 anyway.

It started off with a false awakening, which are rare for me.

I wake up in the 1319 house (J room) and start getting ready for my morning (not even remotely realistic for a false awakening). The first thing I do is take a bath in the 2nd floor bathroom, and it's sort of strange and scary; the water is oddly dark and near both edges lengthways (how 2 describe ??) I can feel an uneven edge in the floor, some sort of precipice, little rough bits that threaten to cut me. I can't see anything, though. I'm also wondering whether a bath is really how I start my mornings, wouldn't a shower be faster? Don't I usually shower? Or I suppose it's usually a bath. My mentality seems to be present-day, despite the surroundings.

I may have spent a brief amount of time getting ready in my (J) room post-bath, but the next thing I remember is sitting next to Ben (he's wearing a grey t-shirt) in the living room, on the blue couch. There are some hints towards present-day reality, such as the fancy computers he and I are using, BLEHEHH. I'll write this part later it's too frickin' sad. (My brother was home over spring break and yesterday he headed back on a train so yeah he's one of my favorite people ever)

*SIIIGH* so at first I'm just brushing skin foundation over someone else's artwork in a big notebook, I'm not sure why. They used some sort of wet clay marker or something, so the skin foundation sticks to the art but not the paper. I'm havin' a good time just brushin' it everywhere even though on some level idk if I'm just hurting their art. The feeling was pretty cool though, very realistic. Nice detail.

Then I'm showing Ben some kinda audiovisual webcomic, or more that I'm just letting it play on my computer and he looks over sometimes. I don't remember the storyline very well, although I do remember it was kinda urban and at one point four guys were in a car, and the driver guy suddenly passed out or something, maybe he pulled over first, they were kinda just waiting for him to wake up. One of 'em gets out and takes a phone call from their boss, tells him the situation, gets his orders, and then leans down, sticks his gun in the car, and shoots the driver. The perspective was from outside the car so you couldn't see anything violent.

Lastly... ;-; I said something to Ben like "did you miss your train?" in a sort of awkward teasing voice, and he looked at me like I was crazy and said no, he didn't. I said "So you're in [college] right now?", and he said yes. This all came as sort of a shock. I considered the implications of this, that I must have been talking to him over Steam while interacting with a hologram, except that explanation wasn't a way to cling to reality; it was more that, because this was a dream, that sort of thing was possible. I did the nose-plug reality check, found I could breathe, and fully realized I was dreaming. (sry for tense change)

I get up from the couch and say "I'm dreaming" out loud just to confirm it. Everything feels very real. I walk towards the front door; I'm standing in the living room doorway when I hear Ben on the couch behind me. I look back half-expecting him to have changed somehow (something I'm worried about in dreams, you'll see later with the lifeguards), but instead he's completely gone. Dad's grey blanket is piled up where I'd just been sitting.

I focus on trying to get outside. My first thought is to phase through the glass; it seems like glass would be the easiest thing to phase through, but I find myself pressing my hands up against it instead. I'm sort of frustrated by this. I try for a bit longer, and then I decide to simply break the glass.

I slam it with my fist and manage to break it somewhat. The door is actually split into two sections of glass, top and bottom, separated by a wooden bar piece. I figure I'll have to break both, though the logic isn't all there, and continue punching the glass and broken edges (sustaining no pain or damage). At some point, because it's not really working either, I stand back, hold out my right arm, sort of brace it by putting my left hand on top, and try to summon some sort of concussive blast to shatter all the glass, thinking of Mega Man or perhaps Kadaj with his materia. Nothing happens. Then I try breaking the lower section of the glass with my eyes closed so it'll be easier to crawl through (logic ??). (My eyes-closed view was sort of interesting, because it was all dark except for a mental picture of the broken edges of the glass around the hole.) Finally I just stand up and try the (old, loose) doorknob like a normal person, and it comes off in my hand. Underneath is another one, slightly larger but also very old and sort of ugly. I try that one and finally manage to get out the door, opening the next door after it easily.

Now I'm outside in the 1319 area, in the daylight, taking in how real everything feels. I start flying up to the roof, thinking about the dreamviews competition (#17), and have no problems getting to the roofs of the townhomes. There are some smaller townhomes on top, minis. One of them has sort of a colorful beach house design, with a sign out front explaining that it was designed by a 6-year-old and is up for auction. There's an open house going on inside.

I get the idea to summon Ben back, and start calling his name, then turning around expecting him to be behind me. That doesn't work, so I head into the 6-year-old-designer house, still calling him. He's sitting on the stairs inside (green shirt now), which are so small no one else can get by, and I hear people on the second floor. I come sit by him, a bit lower on the stairs.

There's a sort of odd brown mug with a cover/lid of some sort on a convenient wooden platform (there's a better word) in front of us. I decide to try passing my hand through it. I hold my hand out palm down, fingers together, and try moving it horizontally through the mug. At first it doesn't quite work, and then I find my fingers passing through it rather slowly. It seems to be solid all the way through, not really a mug. The sensation of moving my fingers through it is like passing them through slime of some sort. One successful pass later, neither the mug nor my fingers are changed in any way. I try it again, a couple times, and while I'm trying the last time I say "it's like air!" out loud, in the hopes that it'll be a more "professional" sort of "passing through", more like a ghost. It doesn't work, though. At least I'm optimistic.

I go outside next, and, still on the rooftops, head up the street towards the mall. (I think, for the sake of convenience, I'll designate the direction I'm currently heading "North". The houses I'm walking on face West.) I see some sort of Stone Harbor-esque structures in the distance (Northeast) and go towards them; there seems to be an ocean or perhaps a bay on the East side up ahead. There's also a weird metal structure that I'm interested in flying to the top of, for no particular reason.

Now I'm walking North-ish down the street in the Stone Harbor area, no longer on rooftops. I start thinking about whether I can turn this into some kind of chase dream (or more specifically, "being chased"). As I'm thinking this, I notice five-ish lifeguard guys behind me, reminiscent of some sort of gang. I wonder if they're going to chase me, and decide to keep a low profile for a moment. I go around a corner and then busy myself admiring the detail of the dream, peering very closely at the white-washed wall, which has some ugly yellow spotted stains on it, while they walk by to my right. Then I investigate another wall (slate gray?) so my back is to them.

At some point as they walk by, I think about the way that things can change easily in dreams. It tends to surprise me how stable dreams are, given that when I try to imagine things IWL, I can't get anything right visually and it can't seem to hold steady. At this point, thanks to my thought process, one of the lifeguards abruptly doesn't have a head; only a sewn-up and scarred neck stump (thx Outlast). He keeps walking just fine, and I think his head may have returned after a moment. idk if that counts as a dream power so much as a mistake.

Next I fly around a bit more, maybe up to the metal structure, and then land next to a tide pool with minnows inside. On closer inspection, however, I realize they're actually small piranhas (some are still actively switching to being a mini piranha). I say something surprised out loud about piranhas. Then I hear a sound nearby, and look down to see a small frog/toad-looking thing sort of snuggled among the wet stones. I wonder if my dream wanted me to throw him to the piranhas, but decline to and move on. I think I probably woke up shortly after, without my alarm going off.

Re: the WILD attempt.
I woke up after 6 hours, tried to remember dreams but only got fragments, decided to write them down anyway, briefly reviewed BillyBob's WILD tutorial, set my alarm to wake me up in an hour and a half, and then laid down, on my back, to sleep. Then, for a while, I could feel myself slipping closer to sleep by degrees. I was trying to monitor how exactly it felt: the heaviness in my chest, the deepening layers of almost-sleep, my mentality. I could feel it when I slipped down another layer, and realized this was the closest to sleep I'd ever been while WILDing. However, at some point I rolled over onto my side; it's more comfortable. I should probably just start out there.

Eventually I started getting the hallucinations, and this time I tried to simply observe them, smothering my impulse to tense up. I was surprised to realize that I'd felt this sort of thing as I was falling asleep before, where I would hear-without-hearing someone's voice or some noise close by my ear, although the visual hallucinations were less familiar. First they were quick, flashing images, and then, a bit later, some static and fuzz. I kept trying to focus on clapping my hands in the front office of the 1319 house, and when I fell asleep I woke up in the 1319 house. I wasn't lucid, though. Could still use improvement.

Shoooot, my recall is bleh. Feels like I've been sleeping weird, or too lightly or somethin'. Think I'll try WILDing.

Fragment 1
Uh, these were some kind of "lucid" dream where I wasn't really lucid. I can't remember any details, I just remember waking up from something my brain called "lucid #6" or whatever. Kinda felt like when I try to solve math problems in my sleep and come up with crazy gibberish, which usually indicates that I'm focused on something IWL too hard. So apparently I'm focused on lucid dreaming IWL too hard? What?

There were actually a few of these but again, no memories of anything, just the impression that I was going in and out of dreams fairly quickly. And my brain called them lucids, but it was half-asleep, sooooo. I don't get it. Gotta think more.

Fragment 2
Playin' Pokemonzz. There was some kinda drama going on but I don't quite recall. Some Pokemon being depressed or something. It lost its owner, perhaps. That IS depressing.

It went in and out of that third person perspective where you're looking down at everything from above 'cause you're playing Pokemon, which is inconvenient because it's kinda hard to look at your hands from that angle. heehehhehehehhe. okay im going back to sleep x.x

hrm. slept fine. nothin' to report.

Fragment 1
Dreamed about somebody being on trial and/or going to jail. They had a couple buddies who were hanging out in the court rooms during the hearings and/or were considering going to jail with him just to keep him company.

Fragment 2
Hangin' out in the youth group from the old church. I think it may have been a sleepover of some kind, and they may have played a movie, or maybe it was a nighttime church service for the night owls of the church?

Fragment 3
Walking down the street with dad during the day, heading home from the 1319 7-11. Some old lady ends up needing to go past us quickly so we have to move outta the wayyyy~

Dream 1 - In which I spend ridiculous amounts of time in a CVS but it's interesting anyway.
So it's nighttime and I walk into this CVS with Dad and I'm gearing up to buy a package of (Wonka) gobstoppers. I pick some up near the entrance and right away a store associate dude calls me over as if to make sure I'm not stealing 'em, and I'm not, so I go with it. Then he goes to ring me up, but for some reason decides that the goods he's selling me aren't up to the standard, and then neglects to sell me anything at all. I'm a little miffed by this.

I wander over to the toy section and see some horse stuffed animals like the ones I used to have as a kid, but when I pick one up it's objectively sucky. The eyes are too big, the head is too small, and the horse looks kinda awkward as a result, like a big ol' dork. I scoff at the follies of the manufacturer, with a bit of pretentious nostalgia mixed in. (This is based on a true story, where I recently bought a "gold edition" Bionicle Rahkshi 'cause I frickin' loved those things as a kid, and not only was it like twice as expensive as a regular Rahkshi, it also didn't have the gear at the back that lets you flail its arms around. For shame.)

I'm actually not quite sure about the timing of this part, but I'm putting it here because hhhh. I'm in the toy aisle, still, and I look up to see some dude I haven't seen in forever, and I'm like "I know you!" and he's like kinda sarcastic so he goes "Yeah, I'm [fake name] from [fake place]." and I'm like, "No, you're [guy's real name]." and there's sort of a flicker of surprise and/or alarm on his face, and then he goes to purchase some stuff and then leaves. I'm telling Dad that I just saw [guy's real name] and then I look over and he's frickin' gone with the wind and outside in the night already. I briiiiefly consider going after him and then figure chasing people around isn't my style.

I'm walkin' towards the back and I realize that I've got the world's dumbest hairstyle right now, with my hair pulled back in a very lazy ponytail and a terrible baseball cap slapped on top, but my conclusion is that as long as it's comfortable and I don't feel it, it doesn't matter how I look. Like in video games, or something. You don't feel your dumb hair in video games. OK I forget how exactly the train of thought went ..

Anyway I walk towards the back along the left side, and I see two young kids, brother and sister, playing table tennis on a non-table-tennis table. I'm briefly impressed by their ability.

Then, as I go around to the right, I see some other crazy stuff, maybe a way to the second floor? It's way more open back here, it's reminiscent of other times I've dreamed of a store like this one. I think.

I'm still loopin' around and I happen across a sort of grown-up daughter and her mother all chillin' on a couch reading books and being mother-daughterly, in front of this super awesome display that's supposed to sort of mimic the impression of being in a wintery house (This is my Decemberrrr... these are my snow-covered treeesss~). Or something like that, I'm not actually totally sure how it worked. It looked like the shell of a house with snow on the inside and glassless windows that somehow gave the whole thing a sense of real depth. Personally I thought it was great. If I'd been lucid I would've been able to step in and change the dreamscene to a wintery wonderland.

Arright then I wander to the pet section. I see a row of cages, first couple have rats (which I want to pet but don't want to stick my finger through the bars), and then a bit farther on, some guinea pig/rat crossbreed looking things that are somehow even cuter. And then there was a segment about how various animals in the pet section were feeling distressed and trapped in some way, like I saw a rat digging in his bedding and there was so much bedding and some of it was more like stone for some reason, and then after he'd dug out a pit some store employee, when I wasn't looking, put a plastic igloo thing on top of him and then he couldn't get out. I dunno what that was about or what my brain was trying to tell me but it was sorta sad.

Anyway then I'm heading back towards the front along the right side of the store (from the perspective of a cashier up front), and as I'm goin' down this one aisle I see these two guys with powers chasing customers around. I don't think they were all bad but honestly I don't now what their deal was. It didn't phase me at all anyway.

Lastly I went up front 'cause I wanted my fricking gobstoppers already, so I grabbed a pack and paid for it with a different cashier this time, and as I'm doin' that I look over and see fricking. Ketchup. Gobstoppers. And I'm like wait what, that's like a Japanese sort of flavor, and I'm simply flabbergasted by this development. I chat with the cashier about this crazy nonsense while I'm looking over the package, and then I notice it's a joint effort by Ford and a couple other companies, although I can't imagine why they would be so invested in it. Then I finally get my regular freaking gobstoppers and I think that's where the dream ended. I spent so much time in that CVS.

Btw even though that last paragraph featured a great deal of me being surprised by strange occurrences, I did not then, nor even now, consider it any sort of dream sign. I think part of me likes to take things as they are in the dream and not question whether it somehow means it's all in my head. And on the whole I think that part of me is tripping me up in my journey towards having a lucid dream for the first time since. Uh. February. Hehe.

But yeah I haven't been focusing on lucid dreaming so much as just recall, I think on some level I just want to be invested in the dreaming experience and now that I've been journaling again I've started to be invested again. My dreams are becoming more real, my thought process more natural and rational, my reactions more appropriate, and that's the main thing I was missing. It's so incredibly boring to have dreams where I just take what happens and don't even think about it... and lucid dreams will come next.

uhm. apologies in advance for what will surely be a truly enormous post. I'm recalling so much, wooo. In fact you know what Imma use spoilers. That'd be cool. hoo yeah.

Important Note
When I woke up I found myself going over the dreams I had, and then I had a sudden flash of realization: remembering all my dreams was what I was SUPPOSED to do! It was an odd feeling, because generally the part of my brain trying to recall and record my dreams, and the part of my brain that stores the memories, are painfully separate. I'll recall pieces of dreams at random throughout the day and think on them as if it were perfectly normal, and then, almost in the same train of thought, be wondering "what did I dream about last night?" Same thing happens in the morning, where I'll idly think on my dreams, and then the moment I start to get up, I remember my intent to write dreams down, but I've already half-forgotten everything. But this time I connected the two! Or something! I don't really know how it works!

Dream 1 - My First Job ?? 8D

Spoiler for In which I land the first job I've ever had in my life and it is in a fancy place:

So, I dreamed that I got a job for the first time in my life, thanks to some dude (maybe my old bus driver?). I remember being sort of surprised and nervous about the fact that I had, indeed, got the job; it was one of the first things that happened. The setting was a very luxurious ... entertainment something-or-other, maybe a restaurant or maybe a theme park or some combination thereof. It was entirely indoor, climate-controlled, with a great deal of plant life all around, dim lighting, water fountains, marble, the whole shebang. Sort of a cross between a bio-lab in Planetside 2 and a fancy hotel lobby.

I didn't get to explore it very much though. I presented myself near the front, was admitted, had to put on a cloth bracelet thing that said "BugGirl" (my old name) in blocky embroidery (... it's a certain type of bracelet iwl but idk what it's called), had to do something else for further identification and to make sure I wasn't fired, and then went towards my designated area, where another employee, a girl around my age but probably older, was gonna show me the ropes. I remember that the bracelet had a surprising amount of detail: it really did say BugGirl and I could read it plain as day, see the shape of the letters and everything.

So the girl explained things and then I was off and rolling on my own. The pattern of things wasn't too bad; I remember coming back into work maybe once or twice, and having to re-don the bracelet and other identification, but the dream never actually left the original setting. It was just sort of implied that I'd left and returned. And after my original new-job-jitters I got the hang of things. Woo!

I don't recall what my actual duties were. I do remember a fragment where I climbed a ladder close by where I was assigned, and another where I had to know something about a certain (or some certain?) African American figures in history, such as Sojourner Truth, but I'm not sure why I had to. Also I may have befriended an employee, or that may have been a false memory from the last dream. HMM.

Dream 2 - Coming up with names that sum up what the thing is is difficult

Spoiler for In which I advise a squirrel general to throw away his army against a fearful opponent:

This may have happened before Dream 1 but I'm fairly sure it happened after. But not totally sure.

I dreamed that I was inspiring a Redwall squirrel to throw his Age of Empire-esque units against a truly fearful opponent. I'm not sure why I did this; he was probably screwed.

There's something else I need to remember. I think the squirrel and I may have been friends. We had a conversation outside of me trying to make him attack an enemy he couldn't handle. I'm not sure what we talked about.

There were two different situations in which I got the squirrel-general to rush the fearful opponent (concerning whom I wish to recall more, get on that brain). The first was, the squirrel general and his army were on a bridge in front of a tower, which the fearful opponent inhabited with his own army. I advised him (or half-forced him) into moving his units forward to attack, at which point enemy units came flooding from the tower, with the fearful opponent in the lead. I'm pretty sure we didn't last long. He may have had an elephant or so, and they may have been flying.

There was another situation, and this time we were in a forest. I believe I convinced him again to attack the opponent, and this time we may have all been captured. I recall being rather unconcerned by this, which made sense. After all, I was the one who'd been convincing him to throw his units at an unbeatable force, knowing full well the most likely result, so I was expecting and even intending such an outcome. I'm not sure why though.

Details remain evasive. We may have been held captive high in the trees. I don't recall whether ... contact was made ... with the fearful opponent directly, such as a conversation. I get the feeling it's distinctly possible, but recollection remains low. I wish I remembered more. I'm pretty sure this was a more interesting dream than I'm able to give it credit.

Dream 3 - 7-11 and Andrew and Junk Food

Spoiler for In which I buy things from 7-11 and have a generally good time:

I almost feel like I'm skipping something, but oh well. In this dream, I lived within walking distance of a 7-11, which I frequently visited, spending my boyfriend's money in the process (with his permission of course). He had a tendency to be there already, asleep in the clothing aisle, and I'd just have to walk over, wake him up, and ask for cash. For the most part, I would then spend this money on necessary food items, which may have been something I did early on in this dream, or during the first half. The timing is sort of confused.

The first half, I believe, involved myself proceeding along those sorts of lines, and also observing as a family with two moms and a few kids perused the aisles. One rather young kid boy child thing seemed to really want junk food, and one mom seemed to really need comfort food that was also junk food. Hm.

During the second half, I found myself wandering the 7-11 idly considering the wares, and gradually coming to the conclusion that I wanted to use Andrew's money to buy myself as many treats and sweets as I could afford. The idea was that he'd given me a $20 to buy something that was actually food, and now there was about $15 or more left over. I figured he wouldn't mind me spending it on 7-11 things, even if those things were just a whole bunch of junk food. I think I may have left that money at home, though. When I checked my pocket, I really only had $2. Also, when I went to ask him, I couldn't find him, and the clothing aisle he was usually in had been replaced by a single display of clothing items.

I remember specifically picking up a bag of smarties as something that I would definitely want, which feels good. In some dreams, my decisions feel arbitrary or determined by the dream somehow, but I remember smarties being something I definitely wanted (and one of my fave candies iwl to boot). Hurrah!

Anyway, I think I determined I'd have to go home to get more money or something, and then I ran into a couple people. First I believe I ran into Ben, which was cool. I think we both took a look at a weird flier that explained how, in preparation for the holiday season, everyone had to get used to digesting raw car oil stuff. It was part of some new technology that would feature heavily in the upcoming holiday festivities, and the flier included tips on how to build up a tolerance and stuff like that. And then at some point the flier was on the floor, and there was a spider or two on it, doing their best to climb it but failing utterly thanks to its gloss. Actually I saw spiders a few times. Maybe a dream sign?

Then I ran into a friend from my job in the first dream ?? which seems unlikely. But when I looked at him and tried to remember where I knew him from, that was my conclusion: oh he's that guy from my first job. He was with a girl and mentioned how there was gonna be a parade soon, and how I should sing in it. I reacted to this with ... the typical response that no I do not like to sing no thank you no.

Then Ben returned as I was leaving the store, and we both set off walking home.

Dream 4 - The Helicopter Bus Thing that was not actually a helicopter

Spoiler for In which I'm in the 1319 area and watch a helicopter bus take off:

Lastly I was back in the 1319 neighborhood in broad daylight, crossing the intersection from the Metro station we always used towards the CVS. As we walked, we saw some weird helicopter bus thing; it was supposed to be the newest technology, the reason why everyone was drinking oil for the holidays, though it really looked less like a leap ahead in technology, and more like some unnecessary attempt to prove that completely un-aerodynamic things can be made to fly for no real reason. It wasn't quite the holidays, but whoever-was-behind-it wanted to demonstrate that it could actually work. Also, it was filled with celebrities and/or people that could afford to pay their way onto the thing, which was called a helicopter but was really just a school bus.

Mom and I commented to each other something along the lines of "Do you think it'll work?", and "Well, it's made by [something here that implies faith in humanity and the scientific method], so it should." At which point the helicopter (which was really a school bus) lifted off.

It managed a brief flight before crashing down and burying itself to the hilt, so to speak, in the CVS (which, in this dream, was more like a bank business building boring thing of some kind), maybe about 5 feet off the ground. It remained like that for only a moment before somehow crunching its way through the remaining 5 feet to the ground, and then, now apparently free of the building and following a brief, tension-filled pause, tipping on its side. The reason it moved like that was probably because I was paying such close attention to all the people arranged inside, filled with concern as the bus moved and tipped about, and watching them tumble while hoping they didn't sustain any injury. Which they didn't.

At this point I was still heading home towards 1319, and then (timing is confused) I remembered that the guy behind Celldweller may have been on the bus. Or else I just happened to look inside and see someone who looked like him. And I was trying to figure out whether it was actually him, and then there was a brief segment where he said something, maybe on twitter, about how he dresses: lots of black and red and a fancy haircut. At which point I stopped worrying.

Fragment
Being in a room, sort of a community center thing that reminded me of a 7-11. I know Nathan was there, and probably some other people. I think before that we'd all been wandering around Rock Creek Park.

Dream - Velociraptors
Yo this was a velociraptor dream. I suppose I would call this a zombie theme, since the general idea is fending off hordes of undesirable things that want to eat me and that are very difficult to run from.

SO in this dream I was in, I think, the Cheverly house, and Ben was with me. There were also a few others, one of which being an older businessman sort of fat guy who seemed very doomed under the circumstances. Also some people were fending off velociraptors in the van at some point, or maybe that's just something I considered doing myself? Personally I didn't like the idea of being trapped in a tiny space with a bunch of velociraptors, but different strokes for different folks. I preferred to be trapped in the basement.
Actually the basement wasn't as open as you'd think, thanks to the piles of junk everywhere, but they did prevent the raptors from surrounding my brother and I right away.

Anyway I can't really remember how it got going, but I do remember that Ben and I were in the basement for a specific reason, something we had to collect, some reason we couldn't leave right away. He was attending to that while I tried to fend off the first wave of velociraptors with something that may have been a baseball bat or simply a long chunk of wood. And apparently the dream's graphics engine got a bit lazy, because the first wave of raptors consisted of rather small clear-colored raptors that were fairly difficult to spot, owing to their see-through-ish-ness. I remember whacking a few, but I had the impression that I wasn't going to be able to hold them off very well, and/or they didn't seem particularly impressed by my attack, despite being hit over the head with a chunk of wood bigger than they were. At any rate, I did seem to be managing to stall them for the moment, at which point the next wave of velociraptors arrived.
These were a size larger and featured Graphics 2.0 with full coloring, which appeared all the more striking as though to make up for the previous and more boring first wave. Their color was something like brown, red, and green, with dramatic zigzags along their backs, and very bright eyes and faces. I don't recall fighting them very much; I think their appearance was a sign that we should leave the basement, lock the door, and never open it again.

Man there was some kinda plotpoint that had to do with why we were in the basement, and maybe even why raptors were coming to attack us, but I can't remember it. Scientific research? Who knows >:U

I also remember a point at which I was talking to the fat business guy in an upstairs room.

Unfortunately there doesn't seem to be any satisfactory conclusion to this velociraptor dream. OH WELL. I'm pretty sure there was more to it as well, like maybe their emergence from the basement as the situation worsened, but I'd hate to speculate. (I hate accidentally rhyming too but whatever.)

UH I was hoping I'd fall back into the flying dream but oh well 83 I ended up dreaming about school 'cause that's what I'm really worried about.

Dream
OK so I dreamed I was taking some kinda class in a fancy marble ... room. I wouldn't say a building because somehow it didn't feel like one. Just a large marble room with another marble room branching off it. Seemed sort of reminiscent of another dream building from a previous dream. I know I just said it wasn't a building but whatever. What kind of building only has two rooms?

The teacher was some lady tryna school me in ... some sort of writing class I think. There was certainly a lot of paper involved; I remember looking over at a filing thingy (I have NO idea what they're called) that held previous assignments, already turned in, and seeing that other students had unanimously decided to put their enormous homeworks between book covers. They sort of looked like photo albums with papers inside. So many papers.

I also noticed that the previous assignment, one we'd turned in just last week (in the dream) had actually been supposed to be (TENSES) a group project. Which wasn't how I'd done it. So that was an especially uncomfortable feeling. I got over it though.

Lastly there was a bit where I was home working on the newest project, but it was some dream house, not MY house. It was still a pretty great house though.

Anyway I found an old half-sandwich in the fridge and I was like "huh I suppose I shall eat this then." The idea was that it was just some old sandwich from like, last week, again, and that maybe it had been left out for a bit since I took it to school with me, but the fridge had probably refreshed it. And anyway it was a pb&j sandwich. So I ate it with all those feelings sort of mixed in. It was tasty anyway.

Fell asleep at 12:30, woke up naturally at 6:30 after a non-lucid(?) dream with dream powerrrrss~
arright so let's see

okay so first was a rather strange part about me and others living under a table in the dining room of the 1319 house. most of us were just trying to get by, but there were two, maybe three who were in danger of killing others ... they ended up in critical condition thanks to me but I don't fully remember what I did. some kinda desperate, bloody fighting. hrm.

neeeext part was probably Ben and I just outside the 1319 door discussing the defensive mechanisms of the house. between the glass door and the gate were two black computers stacked on top of each other with red numbers displaying how many TBs of "protection" they offered, as far as security measures for the house went. It was nighttime, close to bedtime. Ben was lecturing me about how it wasn't really necessary or we owed it to our fellow man to not wall ourselves off from them; he even punctuated his speech by hailing some woman with a baby walking by, though I'm not sure what that proved. Mostly I remember checking out some weird bugs on the porch's stone railing, and then realizing that the computer on top, the more powerful one (with 128 TB), wasn't even on. flipping that switch was very satisfying somehow. per Ben's lecture, though, I left the front gate open.

there was something abouuut some teenagers hanging out in a group in the 1319 living room. I remember one or two girls walking over ... I think it was partially About Time-inspired. I picked one girl to be my friend or something, and then there was a short discussion about R-rated movies during which I heartily insisted I wouldn't watch a particular one whose theme was "boiling" (just eggs out-of-shell, but it seemed like the type of movie that would get quite a bit worse).

then I walked into the dining room where the two-ish people I'd incapacitated were still lying under the table, and then it was time to take them to a hospital or prison or wherever.

now I started to use some dream powers automatically. I wasn't thinking anything like "I'm lucid" and I imagine the thought would've surprised me, but at the same time I was conscious of the need to trick my brain so I could get away with classic maneuvers like flying and breaking windows. Still, I'm not counting it as lucid yet. I don't want to settle... xP

the next bit was about the half-dead guys being driven away in the back of a prison van; but then there was something about a group of teenager chasing me along the nighttime streets. same teenagers, maybe. I think slightly before that was a brief segment during which I practiced floating as opposed to flapping, but it was remarkably hard to stay in the air that way. I found it took far too much energy to simply believe I was able to hover, and any lapse in concentration or belief sent me drifting downwards. I had some success but eh.

Next I was in the streets being chased by eager teenagers for some reason, and I remember gleefully clinging to the top of a red van as it drove along. that was definitely giving them some trouble, my choice to cling to a van. gosh I'm tired and my writing sucks. at least I'm getting this down. I don't remember that part too well anyway, though I was having a great time defying them.

the last piece of dream was set in a museum, and now I was starting to settle into old patterns: breaking windows to fly out. I remember a friend leading me up to the top floor of the museum, where some lady was setting up an exhibit about her writing, which was some sort of fantasy series about warrior rabbits; somehow this was also a lecture presented by the professor of an online class I was taking, and am taking IWL, though the subject matter is different. the only people around were me, my friend, and some hint of the writer lady, such as her voice narrating something about her writing, or the impression that she was nearby, setting things up; the room was set up rather nicely, with a staircase along the east side (top-down view), dark carpeting, dim lighting, a row of windows along the south wall, and some cardboard cut-outs arranged in front of them. there was more exhibit to the north beyond a wall with two doorways, but I was mostly interested in the very many windows.

likely in opposition to my friend's wishes, I started trying to kick or punch out one of the windows to let me through. There really wasn't much time before teenagers would come flooding up the stairs, as far as I could tell, so my main focus was simply on managing to break a window. It took a few good tries on a few good windows; I was trying to lever my self-belief into the equation but it backfired somewhat when I started self-believing that some of the windows were made of two layers of glass, and were therefore much harder to break. Also some had blinds in the way, but I don't think I really cared; it just made it a bit more difficult and awkward.

Finally I broke a window and climbed through, clinging to the outside of the building where I would probably be safe; next, I flew down a bit to land on some wall structure nearby, and then my next plan was to fly up to the roof. I think that's when I woke up, though.

There was also some weird fragment about being in the CVS in that area and someone describing how certain ... things would hide in the displays. Uhhh. Basically how Easter eggs would conceal themselves in their ... packages. Which seems lazy to me but whateverz.

.... guhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
the evening nap apparently wasn't such a hot idea because when I curled up to fall asleep around 11 it took me maaaaybe until 3 am, 3:30 to actually sleep... but after that I was fine? xD I woke up at 7 'cause alarm, then reset it for 8, then my mom woke me up around 9, so proooobably close to 6 hours total but with so many interruptions auuugghhhhh

I don't remember my dreams at all >:U any memories I had are mixed up with the afternoon dreams which are mixed up with something else. so ggggg

hhhhh. I wanted to fall back asleep and pick the dream up where I left off but I think the TV downstairs is too loud ...

Fragment 1
Somethin' about an evil villain type guy who operates mainly in this underground sewer-ish place. Tunnels, dark with red lighting, and with walkways of metal grating. There was something about how he wanted to lure a good guy or a hero of some sort there, in order to harness his ... heroic attributes.

Fragment 2
Dad's chewing noisily and I'm trying to tell him that this time, THIS time, I'm not going to just handle it (I have misophonia IWL). I'm so beside myself that I doubt he can tell what I'm saying, but it's something along the lines of "It's been four times already and I'm not going to keep handling it." I think at some point he takes me aside and explains that I am going to keep handling it. Oh well xP

Dream 1: Walking on Ice
Yayyyy an actual vivid memorable dreaaammm...
It's nighttime and there's a bridge that goes across an enormous frozen body of water to an island of some kind. There's a rather treacherous path at the very edge of the island and at the base of the cliffs, that goes all the way around the island, and tourists are told that the farther they make it around the path, the more bonus attributes they'll get. I'm not sure what these attributes were supposed to be but it kinda reminded me of an RPG or something. Except I think they were positive morality-based attributes, not power-based.

Anyway I wasn't a tourist but I decided to go around the path anyway. My sister was with me, walking along a bridge that also went around the whole island, so we were sort of side-by-side. The path itself was kind of hard to describe. Basically, at the base of the cliffs there was some white-painted wood cut in nice ribbed sort of shapes, at foot level and hand level. I forget what it's called, argh. At some points the wood formed nice flat shelves I could easily step (or leap) on, but other times I had to cling to whatever I could at hand level because my feet hardly had anything under them. If I slipped my sneakers would end up in icy cold water, so that's something I wanted to avoid, but somewhat counter-intuitively the middle of the lake was more frozen than the edges, so it was really only a danger right next to the woodwork.

My method of traversing this path was sort of daring. I wasn't proceeding at a particularly slow pace; more leaping from one foothold to another and clinging to the handholds as necessary. I think Jess and I were chatting as I went and the maneuvering was more background work. I wasn't at all worried about slipping; I think on some level I knew confidence would be enough to keep me from slipping. Low-level lucidity? 8) Maybe I'm getting there~

One interesting occurrence was when I saw a fish frozen in the ice a short distance off-shore. My first impression was that it was an "angry fish" (carnivore), and then I walked over on the ice to investigate, a little nervous as I felt it cracking under my feet. At this point I was a little fascinated by how great the ice looked; really, how great everything looked.

Upon closer inspection, the angry fish was actually only partially trapped, and it had its face pressed up against a hole in the ice. Then I had a good idea, and walked over to where I'd (earlier?) spotted a dead normal fish (non-carnivorous), also trapped in the ice. My impression was that it had been in the ice for some time, but that it would make a good meal for the trapped fish anyway. It was also about the same size as the other fish. I grabbed it at the base of the tail and pulled it out of the ice somehow, and then walked back to the carnivore fish, which I could sort of now tell was a seal, and I said as much to Jess when she called from the bridge asking what the thing was. It had its muzzle poking out the hole in the ice again and was eagerly opening and closing its mouth, and as I dipped the dead fish's face by the seal's face, it suddenly grabbed it and yanked it out of my hand under the ice.

Then there was a last bit where the seal was drifting along (free of the ice) asleep with the fish, now trailing blood, in its mouth. Somehow the fish was parallel to the seal. Actually they may both have been trailing blood for some reason. Then there was some nature narrator saying something about how, unfortunately for the fish, fishes and seals experience unconsciousness differently, so the fish couldn't really escape even though the seal was asleep. And then shortly after that I woke up. Hm.

And then I spent probably half an hour or more trying to fall back asleep but no cigar. Maybe because I was worried about forgetting all this.

WBTB After Six Hours
Hmmmm. I remember ...

Fragment 1
Waiting in a church parking lot for something to happen, like for church to start. There was a lot more going on, but that's pretty much all I can really remember. I think I may have been moving along the ground which sort of signified how close I was getting to church starting. And there were cars and people going by and I was kinda waiting for mom. Huh.

Fragment 2
Some kind of Mega Man story... uh the most memorable part was that at the end, the promising scientist kid turned out to be on his way to becoming another Dr Wily, along with his asian scientist wifey. Like, that was a huge plot twist on top of everything earlier that had happened. Which I can't remember. So ha. I mean bleh. BLEH.
It feels like my recall is getting worse, not better... xD but maybe I'm just impatient!

Morning
uhhh my WBTB attempt was totally unfruitful. maybe because it's finally Spring Break and I just finished that end-of-the-8-week-class essay and my brain knows I can relax and recuperate somewhat. BUT IT IS WRONG. THIS IS NO TIME TO REST.

An Actual Dream Whaaaat
A kid from Paranatural who will remain unnamed is sitting in a classroom with about three others. My mom and I are sitting in chairs in the other room, and then I walk over to the doorway of the classroom. I remember this part a bit better because I was actually emotionally invested to some degree, which is SOMETHING. THAT IS SLIGHT IMPROVEMENT.

Anyway I was leaning against the doorway trying to be all casual and I was like "What's up, Dude'sName?" and he was kinda like, wondering what I wanted, and then I was like "Do you want to ... come talk?" like I was asking him out on a date or something. I was really trying to play it cool and it was super difficult... xD The girl sitting next to him was kinda laughing at me but whatever. HE DID COME TALK. With my mom and I. Which actually wasn't awkward because I view my mom as a cool buddy and not a ninja lurking in the shadows for her chance to embarrass me and ruin my entire life forever. I don't remember what we talked about though. I think I was just really satisfied that I'd managed to extract him from the classroom and get him over here with me. good times ;3

Fragment 3
uhhh this one had a slightly darker mood because I'm pretty sure ... well okay, first it was set in a filing room sort of thing that was pretty dark. And there was some kinda bad guy leader person, and he had this subordinate that he was trying to get to murder everyone in the filing room. I don't remember being too concerned by that though, so I guess it was more like a movie than a life-and-death struggle scenario.

Anyway there was MORE INTRIGUE GOING ON that I can't remember. just, y'know. Know that it was really cool and stuff. Just so interesting. SIGH.

If there were any other dreams they got swallowed up, even though I slept like 10 freaking hours. It was so annoying, I sort of imagined that morning would be when I would just be surfing in and out of dreams but it doesn't make a difference surfing in and out of dreams if your BRAIN DOESNT KNOW THE DIFFERENCE. I seriously remember that when I woke up for my WBTB my brain was simultaneously going "I HAD NO DREAMS AT ALL" and still sort of having flashbacks to the dreams I'd just had. Make up your MIND.

I'm going to get back my consciousness, the consciousness that let me realize the difference between waking and sleeping. I'm going to figure out where it went and drag it back into the open spaces of my mind. It's probably behind a mental dishwasher somewhere. Frick.