Dream Dream Dream Dream Dream Dream

SO LET'S SEE

first of all somethin' weird happened last night, I was drifting off to sleep and I suppose just sort of observing my thoughts (which is a concept I never really understood before but it seems to make sense in this context), and I started continuously knowing when my thoughts had shifted from IWL things that made sense to stories that seemed to be made up off the top of my head. I was just sort of ... listening to my own thoughts, and at some point that I couldn't quite pin down, they would start to get pretty crazy. And for some reason, rather than simply accepting this new development as "factual" (like most of my mind seemed to be doing), I would snap out of it and go "wait that's crazy". Hmm...

It was like part of my mind was the watcher, and the other part was simply dozing, and the dozing part would start to get invested in a story; I would catch myself thinking about something crazy, like maybe an IWL person who doesn't exist, or a story I once heard that I never actually heard, or a game I never played, but my dozing mind would treat it like something I was wholly familiar with, like an old friend. And I think what triggered the sudden realization that it was made-up was when I would think back for an instant, naturally expecting the memories to be a part of my recent past, my waking life, and that's when I would have this chill of "wait that was all just made up." And that happened like, three times in a row, and every time the chill was the exact same. So strange~

—

Now for the dreams. Don't remember too much, I know for a fact there were two separate dreams but since I can no longer remember what happened in which dream, I'm just putting 'em under one header.

Dream - lel my recall is so derpy lately gg
I guess rather than chronological order, I'll arrange this in the order of what I remember best. SO THEN...

Strongest memory would be the part where I was on a dark, fiery battlefield, lots of blackened earth, troops marching forward towards the enemy army or towards destruction or towards whatever waited over there. I was one of 'em, but I was a special snowflake; not exactly "just another soldier". I didn't really have a place in the dream, a prearranged role, no backstory. It was just me chillin' with everyone else, marching forward with everybody else.

AND USING ELEMENTAL CONTROL WHAAAAAT.

I wouldn't really call myself lucid but some part of my mind was naturally invested in the idea of controlling elements around me. And it wasn't really a feeling of "maybe if I do this I will be able to possibly get the elements to obey me", it was more like "hum-de-dum just gonna grab some fire from over there hm that's not very much oh well." Like, I had the confidence I needed, and there wasn't as strong a focus on "breaking the dream" or trying to use my expectations or anything like that. Quite natural.

So let's see I was walking forward and I think I tried to snatch a bit of fire from a fellow soldier's torch (think he was standing by the roadside), but I only ended up with a tiny flicker of flame. It survived for a brief moment, curled up in a ball of air that was cupped in my palm (I mean it was invisible air but I could feel something between the fire and my palm, holding it there). I think the reason I controlled it like that was because in general, when I imagine trying to control fire, I end up concerned that I'll lose control and get horribly burns and stuff like that. And my dreaming, non-lucid mind is apparently the part that likes to inventively come up with little solutions to those problems~ and new ideas for dream powers~ (as in, the psychic poke technique) aaah I love my brain :D

SO ANYWAY next I came to a surprisingly-untouched stream, clear water coursing through a channel in the black ground. I manipulated it a bit, lifting some of it out of the stream in a nice sort of curling trail, but I think my conclusion was that there was nothing I could really do with it, and also it felt sort of ... unsatisfying. Maybe it's just that water physics are so hard to render that I end up with a sort of approximation of water and it's not much fun manipulating an approximation? Who knows.

The third and last elemental control thing I tried was simply that I was still marching, when I noticed something burning coming up on my left. The start of a little wildfire, perhaps, and close enough on my left side that, as I walked past, I got a bit concerned that it might spread to me. So I waved my hand down at it, palm down, in a sort of calming gesture, and the fire almost completely extinguished. Really, given the size of it, it was sort of unexpected that the whole thing would be put out, but I got the feeling that it was easier to simply put a fire out than to try to control it. Fire is wild, but fragile, in my mind.

That was about the extent of that segment.

—

One of the only other things I remember is a brief bit where I was in a dark, rather small room with my parents (think there was a well-lit hallway outside it though), and then my shoe caught on fire. Or something like that happened. I was understandably upset, but my parents did nothing while I put it out myself (for a brief moment, the fire seemed borderline out of control, but it didn't hurt anything except my shoe). Afterwards, I examined the fire damage done to the rubber parts of my shoe with some disgust, irritated that my parents didn't care what happened to the shoes I've had for years and years. GEEZ.

—

UGH I keep getting such tantalizing flashes of how the rest of the dream went. But maybe the concepts just don't translate well to the waking world...

The only thing I really remember is that I was packing up to move, and going down to the basement to retrieve some stuff, and then there was something about a game or story. Impossible to retrieve now.