dream fragment

This one was several days ago. I was in my old apartment in the livingroom. Kuvira (a military dictator/conqueror from The Legend of Korra) was there. I can't exactly remember what happened, all I remember is thinking that her next move was going to be her calling her army to catch me, so I jumped onto her and covered her mouth. I remember seeing the front door as well.

Dream

I was at what would best be described as a military camp-school. I was in a building that reminded me of hogwarts in the way that it was old and classical in appearance. I was in a team of 4 people: a 14 yo girl, a 18 yo guy, and a 15 yo guy. We were at an indoor pool. There seemed to be a lot of teens there, but no adults or CO's. Everyone, including us, had red M4's with lethal rounds. I walked down the stairs and the 14 yo came with me. I thought of transforming my M4 into a M1 Garand a little while later. The girl and I went down the last flight of stairs into a dinning hall, in which had T.V.'s that monitored the major sections of the camp's buildings. On the screen I saw my old friend, Dayne, pull out his pistol on a 13 yo kid after a short conversation with the kid. I saw that no one did anything in that room.

I begun sprinting over to the building where this was taking place, thrusting my rifle side-to-side to generate that extra momentum. The girl and others followed me, probably just to watch the action. Though I think the girl genuinely had my back. I was there within moments, I busted the door open and Dayne begun running. I think some of the others tried to fire some shots at him, but missed. I stopped behind cover and trained my rifle on Dayne as he quickly move across the room. With the perfect shot lined up, I fire a single round, killing him.

He drops to the floor, dead. I face my peers and say,' This what happens when you try to shot someone else.' END

On a side note, I think that our superiors (CO's) that were not present left us unattended as a test. For what, I have no clue.

Afterthoughts

I think this was a test/scenario that my higher self had me run through. I believe that there was much more than I remember, but that the scenario was meant to hone my intuitive self in all directions. I am glad to know that my basic-self, my instinct is to uphold the highest of moral and Good. I'm glad to have killed my friend in the defense of innocence. I always had a feeling that I had a higher connection to Good. Now this confirms that I have an affiliation with Good. Which gives me contentedness, joy, and cause.

As I write this, I feel the high Good energies permeating in my being. Thinking of upholding Good brings righteous energies. I bet living a fully honorable, righteous, courageous, and self-sacrificing life would bring ascension for me, which is what it feels like, I believe I would ascend into a full Warrior of Light. Also fighting for Good no matter what any being thinks or threatens. Also having wisdom, and learning. And of course being spiritual. All with a hint of somethings I don't know about yet should bring me to ascension.

(If you're reading this and considering using that as a means for ascension, don't. That's my path and my way of ascension. Your path is most likely different, thus you must take a different path to ascension. I wouldn't want you to waste your time on something that only works for Lightwarriors.)

I'm not sure if this was a feat that I was tested on by an outside source, such as a higher being or recruiter for a spiritual order. But it would be about time. But then again maybe not. Though I strongly believe that this was a test in general. I believe it most likely, by sensing, that my subconscious was/is honing or training, me to be a guardian of light. Though it shouldn't ruled out that higher beings are specifically monitoring me and subtly testing me. Though if they had to actually sit down in my dream and create a scenario for me to run, then they are already past initial sensing and judgement of my day-to-day behavior. Theoretically meaning that Im seriously in the running for being offered to join a spiritual order of Lightwarroirs.

Dreams

-Field Trip

A group of teens my age and I were on the side of a hill, off of a road. I forgot why. I was more outgoing and wise than my normal self. A guy was acting out because he wasnt accepted. He put on sun glasses, I could tell he put them on to become more acceptable, not because he liked them. I told him he doesnt have to wear them, to just be himself. Since he thought of himself lowly, he thought I was makng fun of him. I assured him that I wasnt and told him a couple other things. He said that he was starting to trust me, to be his friend; I was probably his best friend there, cuz everyone made fun of him.

We all went back up the hill, onto the road, and into our school bus. We rode in the bus for a while. During which, I socialized with other people. There was a pretty, brown-skinned girl sitting in the seat next to me. As we neared our destination she asked me to be her boyfriend. We had a thing going on for a while now, and I accepted. As we got off of the bus she said,' I love you,' in a kind of joking tone. I replied,' I love you too,' in a more serious tone. 'Wow, thank you!' she replied astonished. I dont think she really gets loved by people.

We get off the bus, the class and us are walking into what looks like a science facility of some type. My new girlfriend and I stay behind the crowd. The teachers are leading the pack, not checking the people in the back. When we get into the building, we see a restricted area door. We wait for our group to trail off a while. Then she just opens the door and runs in, I take a last check, and run in. There's an operating machine and nothing else in the room. We climb over it and go down a vertical shoot. I went first. From the bottem of the shout, we can see a hallway and a man in scrubs pushing a cartwheel. We make sure that we dont move at all so that we dont get spotted. Then a couple other people walked past. When the coast was clear we decided to leave, since we couldn't go in any further. I jump and pull myself up and out of the shout. I look back down to see how she was doing. Apperantely, she didnt think she could get herself up, and was holding a hand up to me. I reached down to grab her hand, and pulled her out of the shout.

We snuck out of the restricted area door and walked down a hallway into a lunch room. Our class had already left by this time. So we leave the facility and see our bus still outside. We walk in it, knowing everyone else has already left. Our teacher, who resembled Julius Caesar, waited for us the entire time. As we walked in I said,' I love the dedication of Milwaukie teachers that you would wait for us this entire time.' 'Ya thanks a lot,' my girlfriend said.

I was in a restaurant and Katlynne was there too. I think it was a school field trip it stop. Katlynne was flirting, getting to know a guy. The guy had brown skin, was athletic, and generally a cool guy. I guess it was cuz I was jealous, but he made a joke that crossed the line and I told him to leave and never come back to our school or area. For some reason, he left and he picked up that I didn't want him around Katlynne. She was obviously upset that I made him leave.

We and the rest of the class got on the bus that was taking us home. We all lived in a rural area, apparently. On the bus Katlynne was still clearly upset, so I told her that I would tell the guy he can walk freely and be with her. Apparently, Katlynne liked to have this guy get off the bus with her and have sex with him right as they got home. She replied telling me something along the lines of 'you better get him back'. We were no longer on good terms with eachother. It seemed that if I could restore what I undid, then Katlynne and my friendship would begin to heal. I asked her if she wanted me to tell the guy to go to her house if I saw him.'yes,' she said, still upset with me.

We arrived at Katlynne's house. She got off, didn't say anything to me. The bus backed up a bit and the guy got on. As he passed me I told him that he was free to roam about our area and come back to school. He was cool with, though he looked like he was dealing some feelings of rejection. At this point, I felt legitly bad for him. I wanted him to feel comfortable in our area again. I also told him that Katlynne wanted him to go to her house. He said something like,' oh seriously?' I confirmed it, and he got off the bus and toke a short walk to Katlynne's house. On account that the bus hadn't left at the point.

I was in class in high school with all my old friends. I dont think a teacher was their. We all were just having fun, talking, and watching a movie.

Katlynne talked to me casually. Which was nice and odd, because usually she felt repulsed by me. So I joined her group of friends for the last 10 minutes of the movie and we talk and had fun.

The bell rang and we all left. On my way out I talked to Devin a little. It was nice to see her again, because we were always on good terms. I go to my locker and grab a couple things, then headed down for lunch. It was a lonely lunch since I had no one to sit with.

Katlynne

I thought I'd take some time to go in-depth about katlynne, just in case my future self forgot. She has blonde hair, a perfect body, and has relationship issues; on account that everyone wants to hit and quit her. We've always had a weird relationship, in the physical world and dreamworld.

Back in middle school, I put myself out there for her and she rejected me, pretty harshly. And I had never went for a girl before. She ignored me for a while. Then our friends hung out so we kinda got put in the same situation a lot. We'd say a few words to eachother then kinda ignore eachother. She was the most complicated girl I knew. I couldn't tell if she just wanted to be friends or was kinda being nice because of how hard she threw me down or because she felt sorry for me. No idea. Then for 3 years we are seperated, as in, we are not put in the same situation. Then we get history class together and she starts to laugh at jokes I say in front of the class. She even approached me one-on-one a few times and put casual conversations out there. As if she would like to be my friend. I would talk back to her, but also kinda brush off her conversations. I was still confused and hurt by how she acted before. I feel like she may have been interested in a romantic relationship with me, obviously if we hung out more and she confirmed that she liked me. But I wouldn't put that theory on record. And at this point I had undergone a lot of changes. Something had to have appealed to her to want to be my friend. I more or less brushed her off, dropped out of school and went on to do other things with my life (highschool is pointless and I didn't need to go to a good college for my career choice). Anyways, I've seen her 1 or 2 times since I dropped out. A part of me wishes I didn't drop out, I now realize that her friendship would've meant a lot to me.

Now the tie-in. Ever since I left her 1 and a 1/2 years ago, Ive had dreams of her. About every two weeks I'll have a dream about her. Im not exactly sure why, Im assuming its a mix of her having a big impact on my life and that we have a spiritual connection. Of course I wouldn't say that on record, but I kinda feel that connection with her. Take that however you want, but... whatever. Anyways, these dreams are always about being rejected by her or just kinda watching her. In my dreams, her form basically represents rejection (especially from the feminine), the love that wont be, and just sitting on the sidelines. Always she acts out those themes to me in my dreams, up until last night, when she accepted me.

Afterthoughts

Katlynne usually represents feminine rejection/disconnection for me. And I've probably have had 20 dreams over the course of the last 6 months of her consecutively representing those things. So her having a casual conversation, trying to repair our relationship, means something big. Now I couldn't really tell if she was looking for something romantic later on in our relationship. But one thing I do know is that her form now accepts me and were on good terms.

I can't say that I know exactly what this means. It felt really good to have her acceptance and be able to have a nice conversation with her. It could mean that I've conquered my fear of rejection. But it could also mean other things. Im also not sure if this was a shared dream or not. If it was then it could've been just as much of her getting over what I represent in her life as what she represents in mine.

The lonely lunch definitely puts a twist to things. Like, I'm accepted/not scared of rejection yet Im still lonely. Shiitt, that's right lol Though I'm still a bit scared of rejection. There must be more dimensions to what she represents than I'm realizing.

I can't help but feel that one day Katlynne and I are gonna meet again one day and have a great relationship (friendship, possibly romanctic relationship, whatever happens). I just get that feeling out of no where. It could just be the dreams and resentment of how I left things. I guess time will show if its true.

I have vague memories of a scary dream of monsters lurking in the dark and us being trapped in a big building. Though, of course, with my manly manliness, I wasn't scared; though I did get excited at some points. Anyways, all I can remember is an elevator falling, me with a group of people. A significant character being a late-teen girl with black hair. Some big loading dock in the warehouse part of the complex with this fucked up monster in it. And that a group of 9-12 of us were trying to escape. Oh and 90% of the time it was really dark and I couldnt see shit.