HeSpeaks7

I was in class in high school with all my old friends. I dont think a teacher was their. We all were just having fun, talking, and watching a movie.

Katlynne talked to me casually. Which was nice and odd, because usually she felt repulsed by me. So I joined her group of friends for the last 10 minutes of the movie and we talk and had fun.

The bell rang and we all left. On my way out I talked to Devin a little. It was nice to see her again, because we were always on good terms. I go to my locker and grab a couple things, then headed down for lunch. It was a lonely lunch since I had no one to sit with.

Katlynne

I thought I'd take some time to go in-depth about katlynne, just in case my future self forgot. She has blonde hair, a perfect body, and has relationship issues; on account that everyone wants to hit and quit her. We've always had a weird relationship, in the physical world and dreamworld.

Back in middle school, I put myself out there for her and she rejected me, pretty harshly. And I had never went for a girl before. She ignored me for a while. Then our friends hung out so we kinda got put in the same situation a lot. We'd say a few words to eachother then kinda ignore eachother. She was the most complicated girl I knew. I couldn't tell if she just wanted to be friends or was kinda being nice because of how hard she threw me down or because she felt sorry for me. No idea. Then for 3 years we are seperated, as in, we are not put in the same situation. Then we get history class together and she starts to laugh at jokes I say in front of the class. She even approached me one-on-one a few times and put casual conversations out there. As if she would like to be my friend. I would talk back to her, but also kinda brush off her conversations. I was still confused and hurt by how she acted before. I feel like she may have been interested in a romantic relationship with me, obviously if we hung out more and she confirmed that she liked me. But I wouldn't put that theory on record. And at this point I had undergone a lot of changes. Something had to have appealed to her to want to be my friend. I more or less brushed her off, dropped out of school and went on to do other things with my life (highschool is pointless and I didn't need to go to a good college for my career choice). Anyways, I've seen her 1 or 2 times since I dropped out. A part of me wishes I didn't drop out, I now realize that her friendship would've meant a lot to me.

Now the tie-in. Ever since I left her 1 and a 1/2 years ago, Ive had dreams of her. About every two weeks I'll have a dream about her. Im not exactly sure why, Im assuming its a mix of her having a big impact on my life and that we have a spiritual connection. Of course I wouldn't say that on record, but I kinda feel that connection with her. Take that however you want, but... whatever. Anyways, these dreams are always about being rejected by her or just kinda watching her. In my dreams, her form basically represents rejection (especially from the feminine), the love that wont be, and just sitting on the sidelines. Always she acts out those themes to me in my dreams, up until last night, when she accepted me.

Afterthoughts

Katlynne usually represents feminine rejection/disconnection for me. And I've probably have had 20 dreams over the course of the last 6 months of her consecutively representing those things. So her having a casual conversation, trying to repair our relationship, means something big. Now I couldn't really tell if she was looking for something romantic later on in our relationship. But one thing I do know is that her form now accepts me and were on good terms.

I can't say that I know exactly what this means. It felt really good to have her acceptance and be able to have a nice conversation with her. It could mean that I've conquered my fear of rejection. But it could also mean other things. Im also not sure if this was a shared dream or not. If it was then it could've been just as much of her getting over what I represent in her life as what she represents in mine.

The lonely lunch definitely puts a twist to things. Like, I'm accepted/not scared of rejection yet Im still lonely. Shiitt, that's right lol Though I'm still a bit scared of rejection. There must be more dimensions to what she represents than I'm realizing.

I can't help but feel that one day Katlynne and I are gonna meet again one day and have a great relationship (friendship, possibly romanctic relationship, whatever happens). I just get that feeling out of no where. It could just be the dreams and resentment of how I left things. I guess time will show if its true.