HomeRiver

Commentary non-lucid lucid

Last night was pretty good for dream recall. I was told in a dream before I started my journal not to go to sleep at my girlfriend's house anymore. This was told to me by a "dream expert." When I woke up, I didn't want to take him seriously but the truth is, my recall is much better when I'm not with her in bed. Still I can't say I would sacrifice the relationship so that I can get better at dream recall and eventually lucidity.

Amazon River
I was camped out on this river in the Amazon close to the city of Iquitos (This is where a former love interest now lives and interestingly it is the largest city in the world which can only be reached by boat or airplane). There were only a few people there in the camp but many people in the city and many people conducting their lives on the river. Many people were busy but I was bored. I tried to escape by going down the river but I turned back because I was a little scared. My friend caught me and suggested that I take a class in the city to learn how to speak Spanish.

75,000 dollars for a room (table)
Waiting in line to go to a concert maybe. It turns out that we are going to have to stay the night in line or the tickets are sold out and we can't go home. We need a place to stay. Inside there are all of these rooms that people are staying in with people waiting outside of the rooms hoping that they're leave so that they can stay there instead. Looked like lines at a port-o-potty at a concert. I didn't think it was worth waiting outside of these because the people would likely stay in their room the whole night. Outside there were empty spaces including cafeteria tables and chairs to stay in. My dad,mom, and sister are there and we all need a place to stay. I go up to my dad and tell him that we should take one of them. There is a Japanese man selling them for the night. He takes me to one of the cafeteria tables and offers it to me for the night for 75,000 dollars. I am incredulous. I go to my dad and ask, "how much would you spend for this at the maximum?" He says 3500. I tell him the real price. We try to get in touch with the Japanese man to make our offer but can't find him. Then I awaken.

Former friend, Office, Uncontrollable Driving
I see a former friend (MS) outside of a cafe. We exchange greetings for the first time in months. This is a guy who I haven't really talked to civilly since April. He's often in my dreams because in a way I miss him but I no longer trust him and he's incredibly angry at me. I tell him I have to leave, but on my way to my house I see a girl at a cafe table and I start talking to her because I know her. He comes and joins us.

Somewhere in all of that, we make a data for a basketball game. We met in the office where I work. It was on one of my "days off" but in reality I'm full time. There were all of these new interns and part-timers getting trained and doing work (including in my desk). I felt that my job was being threatened. I didn't talk to many of them, but one was cute and she was eyeing me. When I got into the office, i noticed there was no place to play basketball. I was looking for MS but he was really not to be found. I thought that I couldn't wait for him forever and that he's probably gone so I decided to leave. Then my high school friend (JR) arrives and walks me out to his car through the back door of the building. As he's driving, we are catching up. It turns out that he was involved in a movie, fiction, a story with themes of a particular conservative political philosopher named Le Fume (he doesn't exist, I googled it). I was impressed but didn't want to ask about the details of it because I didn't want to get into a political discussion. As we are driving, he gets out while the car is still going. I'm holding the wheel from the passenger seat to stay in the lane. Then I realize I need to stop because we're going down a hill and I don't want to speed up too fast. I jump into the drivers seat but it is manual (I'm used to an automatic). I try to apply the brake anyway, but the clutch isn't working. I slow down enough to pull into a parking lot and come to a stop as my tires hit a curb. It is a lot for a park and there is a lake. I'm still wondering where JR is. He should be arriving soon. There are many people there, some who I recognized and they have kayaks. They belong to a kayak club. I get into my bathing suit. My underwear are uncomfortable and I try to take them off in public but someone warns me against it. I get a name-tag hung around my neck with just my name and no summary of who I am. Somebody else gets a tag around their neck with a chicken leg bone tied to it. Then I wake up.

Commentarynon-lucidlucid
Had only two beers last night at the bar before going to bed but felt terrible afterwards and it effected my sleep. I was so groggy in the morning and couldn't recall one dream. By the way, bars seem to be a dream sign so I did a few reality checks while I was there.

I was in the kitchen of my house and I was washing my face over the sink with liquid scopolamine (I had watched a documentary about this before going off to the bar). I was careful not to get any in my mouth or to sniff any of it because I didn't want to lose control of myself and be drugged. I think my mother came in for a while. I think I might have accidentally swallowed some and I was waiting nervously for the onset of the effects.

CommentaryNon-LucidLucid

I didn't have great dream recall this morning. I was at my girlfriend's place and she woke up as soon as I did. While I was trying to recall and write she was dividing my attention. Throughout the night, when I would wake up, I would say very strongly and clearly into my mind, "I will be lucid tonight."

It was my second night in a row where it became apparent that the tensions between my aunt and uncle are bothering me in my unconscious. Also, a friend BD has been showing up consistently lately.

My grandparents are about to come over for dinner. My mom would rather go to their house though. We all hop into my Aunt's van. She is nervous and is biting her fingernails as she drives. I am in the backseat with either my sister or cousin. Soon, it is my sister, me, and my two cousins in the back seat. We are trying to go to sleep in the van but it is cramped (my girlfriend was taking up too much space in the bed). Interestingly, my aunt has all of these sexual bumper stickers. I think that they are extolling the virtues of orgasm, but I can't remember clearly. At one point we pull over on what resembles the street in my hometown where my high school is and my aunt was trying to get my cousin a job cleaning a house. He was not enthusiastic and my aunt reluctantly got back into the car with him. We arrive at my grandparent's house and they are glad to see us. My grandfather is especially glad to see me and takes me up to the second floor of the house (that is where the bedrooms are located in their actual house). I remember wanting to wait for everyone to go up. In the house, I feel like the ground is shifting. I feel like the house will fall over but nobody else notices. My uncle is on the couch watching television and eating some Ricotta. He's on the phone. Everyone else is at the dinner table eating. I talk to my uncle a little. He mentions to my cousin (his son) we're going to bring a lot of chicks over to our house this year. This pisses off my aunt and she starts complaining about him to everyone. (remember, they got divorced a year ago and it has messed up the family and some of my mom's relationships including my relationship with my uncle)

Other dreams that I only have a minor recollection of

Being in my town, looking for my friend MC. (also had a dream like this a few nights ago).

Having great sex with my girlfriend.

Met my girlfriend (YW), my female friend BD and some other faceless girl in the Bank of America parking lot. It was hosting a mobile supermarket. BD pointed to YW and said, "You're quite a woman."

Commentary Non-lucid Lucid
Several dreams tonight about hiding from something or searching for something. I had the thought in one of my dreams that I was lucid but when I tried to experience the dream lucidly I came out of it quickly and woke up. I wasn't too frustrated when I woke up.

Nearly Lucid - Strange City - Jail Break - Mountain Lion - Shopping MallArrive in a strange city on a personal "train" station. The city is called "Somerset" and the word is big and bold on every building. One of the first buildings that I passed was the county jail. Some of the windows were busted open and it was obvious that there was a break-out. Nobody seemed concerned on the street but I could sense the fear in the air. I sped up my walking because I didn't want an escaped prisoner sneaking up on me. Around a corner I spotted a still mountain lion on the sidewalk. It frightened me and I thought it would attack me. I decided to attack it first by going up from behind it around the block. I did this but it was gone by the time I rounded the block. Soon, I walked into a mall. I'm shopping for fall/winter clothes thinking about what my girlfriend would like. They were very eccentric clothes, with brightly colored stripes. On the radio, they were playing the Grateful Dead's version of "When I Paint my Masterpiece." I'm done with that. I go walking through the mall. There are many people all around. Suddenly, and I don't know why, I had the thought I'm lucid! I'm lucid!Quickly, the dream became cloudy and the people started to disappear and reappear quickly. I was losing awareness of my dream body. Meanwhile I'm trying to rub my hands and make a hot girl appear.I haven't really read up on the methods for staying lucid yet lol. Then I started waking up, but didn't fully wake up and went into another sleep cycle.

Lighting & Grateful Dead
Was under a tall bridge in a riverside park with the Grateful Dead (Lesh and Weir were the only ones recognizable). There was a fierce lightning storm and I kept trying to find the best spot to avoid being struck. I was the only one worrying so much. I asked Weir for a ride to my house. He obliged. I said goodbye to the girls, who were people from from my life.

Tropical Lagoon Detective
I'm in a tropical lagoon. I'm on a rock looking at a cat. The cat is looking for "evidence." Supposedly, it is the best at what it does. I dive in myself and start looking for evidence. The cat looks at me like "who do you think you are?" but then accepts me and we help each other. We go up to this stone memorial that is halfway submerged below the water. There are many names on it but I don't make any of them out. They're clues....

I end up in a house who's first floor is flooded with water. We are hiding but someone on the second floor sees me and says that I'm careless.

Suddenly, I'm on the second floor of a bar overlooking a parade of some sort. It is rather crowded. My old housemate is there. He's not happy with me, lecturing me on how you have to work hard to keep your friends. I consider purchasing a spear gun to protect me from sharks and other dangers but my cat (who has transformed into a human) tells me its not necessary. There has never been a shark attack in that lagoon.

Argument between my aunt and father
It was at a family dinner. There were many people there, some of whom don't like each other; they consisted of some of the women who live in our town who have contributed to the breakup of my aunt and uncle and to the breakup of the friendship between my mother and her best friend and tensions between my mother and aunt (it's fucked up). My aunt started complaining about something she divorced her husband a year ago but everyone in the family including me and my father still loves him and this causes her some anger toward us. My dad is fed up with her complaining and starts verbally arguing with her. They are jabbing each other back and forth in front of each other. There is insults against the others genitalia. Finally, I get between my dad and aunt, point to my aunt and say, "you have to leave" and then point to my dad and say "and you have to stop criticizing her in front of everybody." At that, they do as I demand. I walk my aunt out and as she leaves I kiss my hand and put it to hers. She has this really kind of gross way of kissing where she purses her lips to an extreme degree. That is why I didn't kiss her face.

Fragments:
1.
Was in my house and new people were moving in. Some of them had complaints about the place and they had their families and friends helping them. I got angry at my friend because she deposited two checks of mine but then my receipt showed that I was losing money. I then threw her bowl with fruit against the kitchen wall and stormed upstairs. When I got upstairs I was in a mansion and I was watching Harry Potter auditions on television but none of the actors matched real life. I missed my girlfriend who was downstairs and wondered what she thought of my angry outburst. She was gone but she had cleaned up my mess.
2.
I was in Seaside. I was waiting for a friend. I kept calling/texting him and he kept saying that he was on his way. He wasn't showing up though and when I tried calling him again, it went to voicemail. He was at a pizza place. I met him finally later in a river setting. It changed into an indoor pool. It gets hazy. My high school girlfriend was there. He was mad or jealous of me because I had more free time than him. It turned into a bar. I was trying to talk to the bartender and the other customers.
3.
I happened upon a group of people. They were playing a game outside. I asked to join. I just remember the rules. We had to make a meal for the group but do it more slowly than any other person. I guess the game was a test of patience. I remember thinking how stupid it sounds and I didn't want to play. This dream occurred in the middle of the night. I woke up, thought it was a stupid dream not worth writing down. I was tired.

I was at a bar with a friend named Betsey. It was populated by hipsters and on the same road that was also the setting of my dream where I had a fight with a homeless man. The bar had the character of being a food court. Even though it was a bar, me and Betsey were drinking coffee and sharing a small cigar. We were passing it back and forth with each other. I started, passed it to her, and then smoked the rest so that I got 2/3 of the cigar. I felt that this was unfair. Also, the cigar was falling apart as we were passing it. Most people in the bar were smoking and I mentioned, "I thought that smoking in a bar was illegal in New Jersey." I saw a high school acquaintance named CJ. He didn't acknowledge me even though I was trying to meet him in eye contact. Suddenly some friends of Betsey came into the scene. I didn't recognize them and they barely said a word. One of them was lying down in her chair. They reminded me of the friends of my real life ex-girlfriend who I had met last month at a bar. Then I had an idea. I said, "Betsey, we should go to your place and watch TV!' She was excited by that idea. We started walking out and she change to my current girlfriend for a little while. I was mostly naked and had to go back to the table to retrieve my clothes. Betsey was back when I went outside again. There was no car. A man offered that we take a huge Rutgers bus. Betsey offered to drive it because I was nervous. She is totally confident. The bus is dirty. I sit in the second row (because it's safer than the front row) and buckle up. We start to drive through New Brunswick. She is driving too fast and I am nervous. WE accidentally get onto Route 18 South when we should get on North. When we are on it it changes to "Amwell Road" and becomes a country road. She keeps swerving into the other lane and onto the lawns that are on teh side of the road. I say we are going to crash. She denies it. I say, "when you keep drifting off the road like that, we will crash" and she laughs. Next we go straight into a tree. I start coming into the mind between waking and dreaming. I try to will myself to make the airbags go off but they don't. Instead I have a vision of a light crunching of the front of the bus. I then have the thought, "lt's okay if you crash in a dream" and just as soon as I have that thought I wake up.

I was walking down the street holding hands with my girlfriend (YW). It was on a street of the city where I work that is more or less the gate into the bad neighborhood and in waking life I feel anxious on that street. It was night time and the street was pretty deserted. We needed to get to my car. Ahead there were two homeless people; a couple. As me and my girlfriend approached them, we lost control of ourselves and walked between them. The man then fell over onto me. He was offended and thought that I had fell onto him. He then became enraged and attacked me but I fought him off and beat him. His partner was trying to take care of him as me and YW scurried away. We walked through some other settings, but all the while had an anxiety that the two were looking for me because we both lived in the same city and frequented the same area.

Later I was at the home of a girl I used to date (CL). It was a college neighborhood type place. She was kind of coming and going from the scene. I think she was flirting with guys and it also emerged that she had some kind of girlfriend. I wanted to tell her the story of the homeless guy. I began to tell her when some people from the zen meditation group came. I stopped the story while they were there because it seemed wrong that I would do something like that if I'm a Buddhist. When they left, I continued my story. She is also a Buddhist but somehow she understood and was somewhat admiring of me.

I'm on a boat. There are several strange phenomenon of which I remember one. A bull crashed through a window and into a room where there was a nurse. It is on a rampage but then falls down a deep hole out of sight.

I go onto the deck of the river. My dad and sister are there. We start tubing down the river. I am on the edge of a mass of people; a pyramid of tubers. Minding my own business this muscular, black, teenager guy comes up to me and starts threatening me. I am trying to remain calm and not get angry back (partly because I will not beat him in a fight). He punches one of my tubes (I have three stacked up) and then punches the other one, deflating them both. Finally, he leaves me alone and goes back to the edge of the river to walk down it with his grandmother. My sister and dad are still present as we drift further down the river. I am separated from them. I go up a kind of "reverse waterfall" that is reminiscent of the ascent on a log flume ride, but the water is moving upwards against gravity; I am floating on the water. Some experts explain that eels and tunnels are making this strange thing happen. On the other side of this water-up is a delta type scene. I relax on the banks and here somebody talking about Atlantic City.

Traveling down a river with my sister is a recurring theme in my dreams. Also, it is common for me, my sister, and my dad to be on a trip together without my mother.

I was in a strange village that was largely deserted. I was waiting for a date. She was only 15 years old and very beautiful and excited to be with me (girl A). When we were first saying hello to each other another girl (girl B) showed up and greeted me with a kiss. I had forgotten that I had set up two dates. I did not like girl B though and wanted her to leave and was embarrassed that she came. Girl A was upset but quickly forgave me when I turned my attention back toward her. Anyway, we were all walking back to girl A's house through this village to meet her family. All these people were looking at me and judging me but not because she was young. They seemed like they were rural, traditional people from the past and I was an outsider. They didn't really trust me but they weren't hostile. We arrived at her house and I waited outside on the lawn while she went in to get her family to meet me. The front lawn was my grandparents front lawn but most of it was eroded away and the surface was not smooth. Girl B who had showed up and kissed me was there but had her focus not on me. She was dancing and looked ugly. Girl A came out of her house and we were hugging each other. She had the feel of my real life girlfriend. I liked her. A third girl suddenly drove her car into the front door. It was a girl that I volunteer with. She wasn't that upset that she did that.