lumiina

This morning my husband woke me up to say goodbye before going to work. I got up and brushed my teeth (don't like the bad taste) then went back to bed. Like usual, before falling asleep I thought about the possibility of an intruder and worried I'd have another intruder, false-awakening, paralysis dream in which I knew I was awake.

I fell asleep with my cat on the bed and the cat was still sleeping with me in the dream. I remember seeing my window, which has brown curtains, and knowing that I was still sleeping. I could feel myself paralyzed in bed and wanted to wake up. At this point I was half paralyzed, as I was lifting up my arm, stretched out towards the window. In my thinking in the dream, I was half awake, but in reality it was all a dream and my real body outside of the dream wasn't moving at all. I thought if only I can move enough, then I'll fully wake up. Finally, I struggle off the bed and onto the floor, then hear a tune very audibly. It was unfamiliar to me. A few seconds later I wake up. When I wake up, I wonder if the tune was coming from outside the dream or fabricated in the dream (often I rely on cues from reality to help me wake up from false awakening dreams, like the radio or an alarm, but I didn't this time) and realized it was in the dream. I knew I didn't know the tune, but I wondered if it was the song from Helix that my dad sent me as a ringtone recently. It wasn't perfectly like it, but it reminded me of it. Now I don't remember how the tune goes. This is the first time that this particular reoccuring dream has had a tune in it.

This was all with the knowledge in my dream that this same scenario happens all the time, and when it happens an intruder will come or my husband will come home early. I want to wake up so badly because I don't want to face the intruder. This time I didn't face him at all. My last encounter with the intruder I was trying to block him from opening up the door and suddenly woke up (I wasn't aware I was dreaming in this instance). I've also seen him in person in the dream, an Asian man (my husband is Japanese), but looks nothing like my husband. But it didn't seem like he is going to hurt me.

Usually, I'm really scared of this dream happening. But now I want to face it and talk to the intruder. So I hope to post more dream journals here and track my progress on this particular dream.