side notes

Type: Lucid, fragmented, experimental.
Lucidity: [3/10]
Vividness: [2/10]



Well first of all let me say that having another lucid dream is a very reassuring thing to me, and also motivating - shows that my efforts, readings from all of you in the forums and books, are all having some sort of productive, positive effect! I tried for a year before I had my first LD, and was worried it was just random/by chance, but that occured on the 20th of September, so this was only a little more than two weeks apart. My LD goal was to have two lucid dreams by October 31st, and I've already accomplished that so early int he month. Woot.

Anyways, the dreams-

First dream of the night I'm at a house party with people my age or just a little bit younger. Lots of fun, I'm drinking vodka but I really do not like vodka much , so I ask somebody if I can trade for their whiskey but am rejected so I go mix it with something and drink it anways [should've been a DS since I stopped drinking]. Lots of girls , really good time, pretty average sized house a little big, white walls and completely dark outside windows. Suddenly we learn that the cops are coming, and there are underage people there so we clean up remarkably fast and efficiently and there is only food and soda out. The cops pull up and are standing outside the door but don't knock for some reason, so I open the door and ask "How may I help you, officer?" and he responds by asking me why I just opened the door [which was pretty funny]. I"m worried since I don't want to be arresting purchasing for minors but they wind up arresting two other guys for completely unrelated reasons to the party and leave without trouble. I remember one of the guys having a bright orange bandana, plain, that just struck me as odd, possibly another DS.

I have another dream after that with the same cast of DC riding bikes or hanging otu near a lake outside, talking to girls, very summer ish, everything green nice big sky . [it's autumn now, no green to be seen]

So I don't recall precisly how I became lucid or the dream leading up to it but this is what I remember of the first one

I'm walking along a cobblestone path, woods on either side of me, and I decide to RC for a reason I cannot recall. I do the looking at hands technique, and then the pinch-ing nose technique and it passes and I verify that I am dreaming. Last time I got over excited and frantically repeated to myself "I'm dreaming, I'm dreaming!" and lost control after about 15 seconds, so this time I was determined to remain calm and gently remind myself, which worked perfectly. I look at the ground, trying to focus my vision and repeat "stabilize" four times, without much effect, at least compared to the effect I expected it to have. Perhaps I just didn't repeat it emphatically enough, will try again in future. I felt a huge sensation of energy and heat flow through my body when I became lucid, and it was very pleasurable. The next part is a bit hazy, I'm kind of jumping around a house, through corridors, checking out rooms, wondering if I'm actually dreaming and keep RCing, worried that I'll hurt myself by flying or something. Almost walk in on my mom in the bathroom but she yells at me [weird but silly], I can't really think of what I want to do, not incredible lucidity or vividness, so I think "oh what the hell, I'll have sex" [since men can always think of that in any situation], so I enter a bathroom, big and plain with shower and big jacuzzi bathtub, ready for sex, and a gay guy is standing in there, and when I walk in he pulls down his pants and bends over, but thankfully his body is kind of plasticy and not incredibly realistic. At first I'm like "meh, it's just a dream, just want to test realness" but don't because.. well.. I'd rather have sex with a gorgeous woman! So I tell him that I want to have sex with the most beautiful woman, somebody I don't know, and he says fine and leaves the room, so I imagine the sexiest woman I can think of and she walks in the room. I must've put too much attention on the woman because when she came in I was viewing it in 3rd person, lucidity wavering but I've never experienced that so I didn't think to stabilize. So she kind of turned plastic-ish and kind of became a doll and the dream faded away

So I woke up from the dream, was about to record it in my DJ but first did a RC just for the hell of itand the nose pinch RC did to for me AGAIN! Awesome, glad I've been practicing that one in RL. False awaking FTW. So I'm lucid in my room, and decide to leave, walk out and I'm in a house different from where my room is, long hallway with windows, so I open the window and think about summoning a bow or sword to act out some Zelda situations [since my alarm is Zelda game boy tunes], but decide I don't really want to do that and fly out of the window to the ground, woods on both sides, dark sky like just after sunset, and a lake infront of me. As I was flying I tried to change the dream scene so I started to spin with my arms out and thought about going to a strip club to try the sex thing again, and closed my eyes, but amazing enough even though my eyes were closed, I guess my "dream eye"[?] wasn't closed with enough resolution and I could still see the scene around me, and the technique failed. So I'm on the ground and remember my intention/ goal to morph into an aquatic creature. So first I attempt running on water, and go across a small section of the lake, and it works, though I'm submerged up past my knees rather than on top, and my legs are burning from running/pedalling so fast. But still cool. So I'm on the other side, and a car drives into the water from around the bend, like on a highway completely natural, and I see the huge headlights under the water, and decide to dive in to get in the car and see what that's like, then try to morph, but at this time my ALARM goes off and I wake up

So yeah, those are my lucids! Not incredibly vivid, but I'm very excited about them anyways. The first one probably lasted five to ten minutes, and the second one only about three minutes due to the alarm.

Notes- In the lucid, my dream body felt SOOO natural it was great! I felt light, and fully in control, I had to keep questioning whether flying was safe since it felt so very real. "can I really do this, will I hurt myself?" The spinning dream scene change technique didn't work, but I can understand how it would, and will try again will definite success the next lucid dream I have. Also, I remember at some point during the first LD a fragment I forgot, I was going to have an orgasm but stopped the sex/activity or whatever was happening, since I remember that most people wake up and I wanted to test other things first. I will remember to try the whole way through[lol] another time to see what the circumstances are for myself, since LaBerge claims it doesn't happen with all people and I don't think it will for me since the lucidity at that point remained very vivid.

I found it difficult to create a new dream scene, and kept getting distracted by thinking "what do I want to do?" I opted against earth bending and sex for the majority of the lucid time because I didn't want to begin a fight unintentionally and turn it into a nightmare, didn't want sex because I didn't want to wake myself up, and didn't try to sit and close my eyes to dream- meditate for the same reason.

I think this was a result of a compulsion/urgency to control the LD because of a fear/ desire not to lose it and forget it, even though in the LD I experienced no loss of control, completely vividness, aside from when I was trying to control it and change things! Though I probably didn't lose my lucidity because I was so single minded on not losing it, but that was also most likely the cause of the bland lack of occurances in the dream. I probably blocked off other potential story lines and experiences because of it, resulting in lots of open spaces and corridors and a lack of other DC's, mostly dark and greyish lighting and color tones.

I need to
A Catagorize more Dream Signs and re evaluate my dream goals, based off of interactions with dream characters for more variety, and also hold off on the sexual and potentially violent/advanced stuff until I'm more comfortable, lots of stuff left to test.

B Read about dream scene changing tactics and focus on visualizing myself stabilizing the dream via techniques like focusing on each individual sense, etc. Will try the "stabilize" thing more since it doesn't take much effort, didn't really lose anything by doing it.

Anyway, thanks for reading, I would really appreciate any advice. What you focus on for incredibly basic aspects of LD DC interaction goals, and simple environment testing things? Trying to control flight more carefully? Trying to start conversation with DC as a way to get a dream cookie? Experiment with time? Change the color of my shirt?

Thanks a ton in advance!