Had long dream where I was trying to kill a child...my motivation was fear... The was a child smiling I though out of devilment initally. I was trying to kill them by bludgeoning them with a chair. I was careful to cover the area with plastic bags to avoid blood going everywhere . the child continued to smile. i killed them. afterwards i realised they were smiling because they loved me and didnt mind how much pain i caused them. i resurected a child...they were not quite the same but i tryed. [cooment i believe i have been hurting myself with my own negative thoughts and lack of self love. but my subconscious still loves me. i will try to be more aware of my emotions.
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