OMG Let's rap battle!

[Jeff777]

Good shit jeff. O is so frekin sick! his rhymes flow better than anyone I've seen in this thread lol Good stuff everyone! Also wont be as easy next time jeff Yeah O is pretty good, but just like you...he can get it too

[Oneironaut Zero]

Thanks, Lonestarx. Anytime, Jeff.

[Universal Mind]

It's funny how you mention my mother yet again, I told you once before, you must be forgettin' when, Common case of Alzheimers, now give me an "amen!" Should I say that one more time before you can comprehend? And penis jokes too? What's next, my balls on your chin? You gotta do better to get under my skin, So let's begin this final bout before I fuckin' win. Mr. Jackson, Mississippi, you say I rape fowl, But take one look at where you're from... that's right, the SOUTH. Where the law is you can't farm unless you can spell economy, Where animals aren't for food, but instead to practice sodomy, Where, if it wasn't for Martin Luther, there would be no equality. Where you'd have to draw a gun on me if you wanted to talk to me. Now I'll stop with the state bashing, for the list would be infinite, You can't keep making insults that label you hypocritic. So quick, grab that hen before it's turned against the law, Pick up Jeff, set the mood, and dive into ménage à trois! Here I come to win with the round's final one, but I don't have to do shit 'cause I already won just like I won your... never mind... I'm tired of her fat ass, so now it's time to bash on pussy Canada trash Do all the men in the French Tundra want my balls on their chins? I'll have to say, "Fuck no!" I'm never going there again. But you can come on down to 'ssippi and lose all your dicks when you challenge our shotguns with your hockey sticks Then we'll shove them up your ass and give you swirlies and the order not to all live two inches from the USA border You included me and Jeff in your masturbation fantasy involving your hen that's become your favorite pocket pussy I hope your goats aren't jealous since you made that revealed so I won't tell them a word when you're horny in their field with a "brewski" in one hand and your balls in the other, slowly facing the fact this battle victor is the Southerner Allright, good game. Let me buy you a drink.

[Identity X]

Since you're slow at perception I'll tell the readers about your life He turned to masturbation when he caught me screwing his wife He caught me doing it right, turned to her and then he said "Shit Rachel! I didn't know you took cocks that big!" Well she DID, cause I'm done with her, but wile I had my fun with her? I videotaped the sex, and sent a copy to your grandmother Now you know why grandma smiles when I'm around And why she takes her teeth out, whenver I'm in town If he wants another round I'm not down Unless you come with your casket, so I can put it in the ground But going back to your mom..I bet the readers wanna know What happened to the video of me and that bangable hoe Well here's the story, so don't get lost and keep up dude After I finished recording... I sent a copy to youtube You can check it out now readers, it received a million hits I gave you a shoutout Identity, while cumming on her tits Identity's wreckless readers, so it's best that he wise up And get a penis pump, like his muscles he needs to size up Come round 3? Nah it's best that you quit now Your spit is still shit but do your thing and take a bow You managed afterall to make it this long But where I'm going to send you? No "E.T. can help you phone home" Time to end round 2, I think I've made myself clear Quiver says he's your nightmare, bitch I'm YOUR nightmare here Nowhere to run and nowhere to hide, consider me your gravest fears I'll take you to your grave half alive Your hearts dying beat the reaper hears... Since you cannot read, I will write your own book; A page and a half, that's all that it took; 'Cos your life ain't nothing, not even work one look, You are the pawn to my analogous rook. I can move however far I like, Capture the queen, fuck the king's wife. But look at you, scared for your life, While I am the master, sharp as a knife. Oh sorry, fag, I forgot you can't play, Such a stupid kid, your parents didn't pay At the orphanage, the one for gays. So ugly were you, they just gave you away. You don't know algebra, heck not even ABC, What is two plus two? Dude, you think it's three. You don't even understand the Teletubbies, But even so, you're as queer as Tinky Winky. The story so far: You're a thick ugly fag. I'm not homophobic, not as stupid as that, But what you do is sick, fucking the fat, 45 stone; you like men fatter that that. They turn you on, no not the overweight. The morbidly obese, they are your "playmates" Sucking their cock, feeding them cake, "When you've finished that, I've got another one baked." You like their tiny dicks that they have never seen. Their giant assholes that they have never cleaned. You say you're well endowed, dude I don't disbelieve; You'll need to be to fill their rectal ravines.

[suttsman]

Gotta start every rap with some random shit, lol Yo...yeah, check it... this the beat we working with? Turn that shiz up...Ughhh, Ughhh You got guts sutts, but you made the wrong decision I'm getting PM's from your friends like "Please done kill him!" (Too late) Are you serious? A battle between you and me? Aint even a battle, it's a reading of your eulogy Here lies Sutts, thought he was a rap creator Spit his crap at Quiver, and died one post later My flow is disaster, I can see it got you torn Sutts going to sleep every night wishin' he never born Survive one round, son, and i'll consider it a feat I'm already at the top of the game. You buried underneath. My ego got you quivering, but I ain't gotta brag You can just relax, while I zip up your body bag *turns mic horizontal and drops it* haha Jeff's got some pretty funny stuff -> "e-genocide" I like Onei's flow though, especially in the very first one he posted I haven't read everybody's yet but the thread is jokes lol Nice one, man! Gotta give you props. Definently better than that human punching bag Ramna. But can you beat this.... Hey, Look the man actually made his words rhyme You think you got me killed but it just ain't my time Me and this here rhyme will last a thousand years You can just scram now, it'll save you a few tears! I just cannot die, cos I could take on Death Just don't even try, I'd win with just one breath Even if you try, man, there's just one round left I'll swat you like a fly, It's like an ego theft! You think I need mercy? Hah! Not from scum like you! Because you cannot see, I'll help you get a clue You need skills like me, I'll show you what to do Either step it up to me, or go on, buddy, shoo! Now you!

[lonestarx]

So yea I came back to spit this verse for anyone think they got it reversed thinking they can take me on well I say bring it and get your lights turned off yea I might be new challenging well establishments blazing these undergraduates while I dust off my sword dent after dent, and blow for blow one after another it'll be over just like your mother

[Quiver]

oo I'm coming back after you Sutts, as soon as I get back from hockey. I was trying to work in a Green Bay angle before lol... but I think I read that their record was like 13-2 or something and I couldn't think of anything. We should have like some themed battles, they're more full of punch lines than just general insults and praise. I wanna take Onei in like a matrix-themed (ie. using some matrix references) battle, he's probably like an encylopedia.

[suttsman]

Ah, okay. You got some real skill, man. It's good. We should have like some themed battles, they're more full of punch lines than just general insults and praise. I wanna take Onei in like a matrix-themed (ie. using some matrix references battle), he's probably like an encylopedia.

[Jeff777]

oo I'm coming back after you Sutts, as soon as I get back from hockey. I was trying to work in a Green Bay angle before lol... but I think I read that their record was like 13-2 or something and I couldn't think of anything. We should have like some themed battles, they're more full of punch lines than just general insults and praise. I wanna take Onei in like a matrix-themed (ie. using some matrix references) battle, he's probably like an encylopedia. That's be hella cool, but interesting you should mention that...tell me...have you seen the wizard of oz?

[suttsman]

I can't wait to do it this one....... You talk about heat? You talk about snow? Well listen up bitch, you don't even know. I rhyme so fast, you rhyme so slow. i'm packin the heat, i'm burning on fire, your time is about up, you're about to expire. Anyone who wants to battle, i'll do it all day, Then at the end of it all, I'll smoke up a jay. I rap in my sleep, i sleep while I rap, the shit that you're saying, it's all the same crap, that the little noobies say, when they're startin out, and when they lose a rap battle, they scream and shout. They can't admit, that there rhymes are shit, and that they don't know, how to deal with it. Some people, they don't like my style, but they just afraid, cause if you look at their file, under parents, you don't even need to bother, because you'll see my name, listed under father. cause i fuck all these ladies, and i fuck em all right, I rock em till the dawn, till they pussies aint tight. They sweat and they twitch, cause my sex is torn, about nine months later, a baby is born. That baby is you, and your sister too. So what you gonna do? Do you even have a clue? So what if I talk dirty, I don't need to talk clean, cause when i talk shit, I'm extra mean. I got alot of lines, i can fucking see, but you know what bitch? You'll NEVER be me! WOOOOOT Haha.. all in good fun. Dont' take any of the shit I say litterally. I didn't even notice you challenged me until just now. Sure, I can handle 2 vs. 1... let's go! The reason I go slow is to add my wit Unlike your words, which is just random shit My words pack power, which comes with a hit You challenged me? Well, the fire is lit I'll admit man, you're really getting better But I can still own you with every single letter You go around flailing that stupid sensless stutter But all that verbal crap goes straight to the gutter Your waving shit around, you looking for some fights Well here a fight is found, and I'll punch out the lights Don't even make a sound, man, cos my words can bite I'll plow you to the ground, so don't even try to write! Ha!

[Jeff777]

Not bad identity, you've definitely improved, but now it's time to end you Since you cannot read, I will write your own book; A page and a half, that's all that it took; 'Cos your life ain't nothing, not even work one look, You are the pawn to my analogous rook. I can move however far I like, Capture the queen, fuck the king's wife. But look at you, scared for your life, While I am the master, sharp as a knife. Oh sorry, fag, I forgot you can't play, Such a stupid kid, your parents didn't pay At the orphanage, the one for gays. So ugly were you, they just gave you away. You don't know algebra, heck not even ABC, What is two plus two? Dude, you think it's three. You don't even understand the Teletubbies, But even so, you're as queer as Tinky Winky. The story so far: You're a thick ugly fag. I'm not homophobic, not as stupid as that, But what you do is sick, fucking the fat, 45 stone; you like men fatter that that. They turn you on, no not the overweight. The morbidly obese, they are your "playmates" Sucking their cock, feeding them cake, "When you've finished that, I've got another one baked." You like their tiny dicks that they have never seen. Their giant assholes that they have never cleaned. You say you're well endowed, dude I don't disbelieve; You'll need to be to fill their rectal ravines. Homosexuality seems to be your forte Sucking dick is your foreplay, after that? It gets more gay, am I done with you? No way. You say you're hot? Not really I'm gonna beat on you harder than bobby ever beat whitney You see me, I spit rhymes about having sex with your mommy The only shit you spit is sick...about gay love and sodomy You bother me, really...find a noose and hang yourself now Or I'll hang you myself THEN put your casket in the ground But not before ending this round, see this here's round 3 You sniff glue harder than CB, if you thought that you could beat me You say you captured the Kings wife and fucked her hard? You're the opposite of smart, you're a high-level retard The Kings wife had aids and she gave it to you She paid gays to make her scream a higher octave or two I'm nearly finished beating you, so don't cringe But to prove how dumb your ass is? Where do I begin? Here's a poptest, tell me what's original sin? Forgive me if I grin, my wit is quicker, you've already lost Consider me fucking hitler in this verbal holocaust I didn't mean to jump subjects though, so I'll rewind Since you're intellectually behind Google "original sin" you'll find The actual definition, but here's a hint since I'm so kind Original sin has nothing to do with apples, adam or eve the FIRST SIN was rhyming gay shit themed "adam and steve" Oh and the second sin which I'm sure everyone agrees? You believed you're up and coming, this put-down will make you leave Before I pull a swarchenegger and terminate this third round I'd like to give you a syllabus of how your love lifes going down Since you rhymed so heavily about kings wives you fuck You lied that'll never be, hopefully here you'll have more luck Girls flock here frequently, so you just may find yours Ask your mommy if you can go there when you're done with all your chores It's a website of course, but Identity don't whine The only sex you'll get is cyber, so there's better luck online You've probably seen advertisements for this site on t.v. Couples holding each others tight, smiling big white and bright Then an old guy comes on, to invite you to his site Let's get this moving along, and end all the mystery After you're done visiting? Don't forget to clear your history So drop all the gay adam and steven stuff dude... E-harmony.com will find someone who'll love EVEN you. Edit: Shall I crown myself victor yet again or does someone need to judge the obvious?

[suttsman]

I declare Jeff777 the winner.... /me gives Jeff another Rap Battle Victims thingy Dude it's just obvious. IDX was pretty good, but Jeff just owned him.

[Jeff777]

I declare Jeff777 the winner.... /me gives Jeff another Rap Battle Victims thingy Dude it's just obvious. IDX was pretty good, but Jeff just owned him. Thanks sutts! IDX -> IDX's funeral -> Funeral Afterparty -> And for the record, yes IDX was pretty good...I was quite impressed.

[Xox]

May I interrupt this lover's tiff, What lame excuse is this for diss? Perhaps Spartiate is stupid, perhaps he is; But what sorta stupid name is Flabisz? It was sensible to shorten it to ex-oh-ex More sensible to make it es-oh-es Girl, you need rescued, no less; 'Cos your rhymes are a gory mess. No rhythm to your lines, My words are in perfect time Perfectly periodic, like sine. My rhymes one of a kind. You think this battle is a game? Only I will reach the heights of fame. Hear me and you'll think you came. My rhymes are good, yours are lame. Leave this sport to the pro. I'm in the league of my own. You were relegated long ago. Underground you've sunk so low. Excuse me? Who the fuck is this? Mr. Nobody Is that what your name is? Ah yes I see it now, Mr. Identity X It's time for you to put that garbage to a rest. You're as soft as taco bell burritos I'll eat you up and spit you out like Chester does to cheetos Beating you in the game is as easy as freethrows I'm the real shot, show me all you got Battling me? You'd have better chance walking through fire My friend, it's best if you just retire I never fall, I'm the best, who's testing me? It's time to accept you'll always be 2nd-best to me My flow is so sick, it can be described as cancerous But it comes easy to me, call it effortless Btw, learn the rules, it's 16 bars Next time you knock at my door, don' forget who you are

[Identity X]

Excuse me? Who the fuck is this? Mr. Nobody Is that what your name is? Ah yes I see it now, Mr. Identity X It's time for you to put that garbage to a rest. You're as soft as taco bell burritos I'll eat you up and spit you out like Chester does to cheetos Beating you in the game is as easy as freethrows I'm the real shot, show me all you got Battling me? You'd have better chance walking through fire My friend, it's best if you just retire I never fall, I'm the best, who's testing me? It's time to accept you'll always be 2nd-best to me My flow is so sick, it can be described as cancerous But it comes easy to me, call it effortless Btw, learn the rules, it's 16 bars Next time you knock at my door, don' forget who you are What's this talk of burritos, Free throws, Chester, and Cheetos? Girl, I'm English, don't you know? No time for your Sportscasts, smores and so-and-sos. We gave you football and you fucked it up Quarter-back, touchdown, what the fuck? Your version of The Office, the jokes suck. Ours had subtlety, but for Americans, that's not enough. Rhymes littered with trademarks, girl that's bull; You're a corporate whore, I'm original. Among giants my lines will stand tall. From up there, like an ant you're so small. God with his omniscience don't see me coming. But like me he can clearly see your bluffing, Your downfall is forthcoming; For I am a king and you are nothing.

[CoLd BlooDed]

Alright, I'm combing through this right now. Expect a thread in the lounge soon.

[Xox]

Alright, I'm combing through this right now. Expect a thread in the lounge soon. About what?

[Jeff777]

About what? displaying battle winners. CB

[Xox]

displaying battle winners. CB Oh! Well I battled Ranma and am done. Battling Spart and Identity X.

[Grod]

This should def go in DV Favorites.

[Xox]

I think we need to organize all the battles, make another thread. I've organized all the battles I've done and am doing. I wouldn't mind organizing them all and making another thread. Anyone with me?

[CoLd BlooDed]

That's what I'm in the progress of doing right now. Thread is in the lounge, gonna finish it once I get back in half n hour. PM me the organized battles if you want, though, it'd help out. Any suggestions to prettify the thread too, just tell me.

[Jeff777]

That's what I'm in the progress of doing right now. Thread is in the lounge, gonna finish it once I get back in half n hour. PM me the organized battles if you want, though, it'd help out. Any suggestions to prettify the thread too, just tell me. How about a favorite battle of the day/week being thrown in there as well? Or... A ranking system...perhaps?

[Xox]

That's what I'm in the progress of doing right now. Thread is in the lounge, gonna finish it once I get back in half n hour. PM me the organized battles if you want, though, it'd help out. Any suggestions to prettify the thread too, just tell me. I'm going to go through the thread and tidy up every battle that happened. Kay? If you want I can PM it or just post it myself. I don't think we should quote it, italisized is a a pain to read. And every post should have 2 people battling instead of the whole thread jammed in. That in ascending order.

[AmazeO XD]

I didn't even notice you challenged me until just now. Sure, I can handle 2 vs. 1... let's go! The reason I go slow is to add my wit Unlike your words, which is just random shit My words pack power, which comes with a hit You challenged me? Well, the fire is lit I'll admit man, you're really getting better But I can still own you with every single letter You go around flailing that stupid sensless stutter But all that verbal crap goes straight to the gutter Your waving shit around, you looking for some fights Well here a fight is found, and I'll punch out the lights Don't even make a sound, man, cos my words can bite I'll plow you to the ground, so don't even try to write! Ha! Round 2 ftw! I'm here to play a game, a game with your rap, to prove to you how much, your rap is like crap. The reason you go slow is to add to your wit? Well in your case, (as well as your face), doesn't amount to shit. Your words pack POWER? You think I'll die and curl? You words pack about as much power, as a 6 year old girl. Girly: WOULD YOU LIKE A GIRL SCOUT COOKIE? Sutts; OH YES I LIKE YOUR VEST! Girly: WHAT ARE YOU DOING MISTER? Sutts: I"M JUST TRYING TO MOLEST! By the way, thanks for the compliment, I wish I could say the same, But in all honesty dude, your rhymes are fucking lame. I'm not LOOKING for a fight, I'm just answering a call, You'll punch out the lights? I"LL MAKE YOU FUCKING BAWL. I"LL MAKE YOU MY BITCH, MY LITTLE BITTY TOYA, THEN I"LL FUCK UP YOUR ASS, JUST LIKE OSCAR DELAHOYA! Well thats the end, And next time tell her to say please, I'm talkin bout your sister, When she gets down on her knees. BAM. Haha.. this is great.