So last night I had A dream and I posted It in the http://www.dreamviews.com/f16/rant-r.../index344.html thread

Heres what I wrote

Ugh lastnight I dreamed about the girl I love most, she was my best friend throughout the last two years of high school, and after I graduated we kinda started messing around. She even randomly showed up at my house on valentines day with a bottle of Sailor Jerry's which she knew was my favourite and we drank and she stayed with my for three days sleeping with me. after awhile I got sick of us messing around and wanted to date, and we had.... IDK not a fight but kind of I guess. anyways after it was all said and done she said she would give me a chance, but I felt sick of it then I lost my job and got kicked out of my house and someone stole my phone and so many things started happening and I was sick of how she had treated me and felt even if we dated it wouldn't change, So I just cut her off and left. I haven't seen here since she said we could go on a date, last night I dreamed about her, and I was searching everywhere for her but couldn't find her anywhere. Then she popped up and said that that was how she felt about me right now, so now I feel like a piece of shit.

Three songs by We Came As Romans played throughout the dream and I remember them Vividly here are the songs.



Am I still breathing?
Am I still breathing?

I've stumbled over every obstacle
That has come before me
But at least I made it past
I've been fumbling over every word I wanted to write
But I've but those insecurities in the past
It's so much easier to leave my mistakes behind me
If I acknowledge that I've made them

(Ithink this part might have to do how I lost over a hundred pounds from the moment I met her because I wanted to date her and how I left her behind.)

Am I still breathing?
Then nothing is as bad as it seems
So just keep breathing, and keep calm, keep calm
The only real control we have is over ourselves
So let's get over it
That we can't and we won't control anything else

(THen this is where I needed to keep myself calm because I couldn't find her)

You can't lose something you never had
So why miss the memory of something didn't exist?
Everything is all right, just keep calm, keep calm
But everything is all right, just keep calm, keep calm

(We never dated so I lost something I never Had)

Am I still breathing?
Then nothing is as bad as it seems
So just keep breathing, and keep calm, keep calm
The only real control we have is over ourselves
So let's get over it
That we can't and we won't control anything else

Is everything all right?
Keep calm
Am I still breathing?
Keep calm

Don't let yourself think that you control
Anything besides the way you live your life
Everything is all right
Just keep calm, just keep calm
Everything is all right
Just keep calm, just keep calm
Everything is all right

Everything is all right
Just keep calm, just keep calm
But everything is all right
Just keep calm, just keep calm

Am I still breathing?
Then nothing is as bad as it seems
So just keep breathing, and keep calm, keep calm
The only real control we have is over ourselves
So let's get over it
That we can't and we won't control anything else
So just keep breathing






I am so far away
And it's more than I can take
I haven't heard your voice in days
I haven't heard your voice in days

(I really am far from her now and I miss her so much)

What is the measure of a man?
Is it wading through the worst?
Or is the measure of a man
Admitting when he is defeated?

But I am not and will not be defeated
I have given everything in my life for this
I'm counting down the days
Though I've been broken and beaten
I know I can't let it, I know I can't let it win

(I am having an inner conflict right now because I gave up everything and lost everything I had in the past couple of months even getting jumped and stole from by "Friends")

This feeling that there is nothing left
That my purpose is gone
These views, they never cease
To keep me from myself and who I am
So what makes the measure of a man?
Is it being too stubborn to let go of the good and move on?

But I am not and will not be defeated
I will wade through the worst of it all
I'm counting down the days
Though I've been broken and beaten
I am not done with this
I know I will not fall

This is my deepest dream
Or is this a nightmare in disguise?
What makes the measure of a man?
Is it always trying to do right?
I'm' so far away
And I don't know if it's more than I can take
With these views, that never cease to keep me from myself

(Whoa because this dream was horrible but it wasn't really a nightmare and it meant a lot to me)

With these views, they never cease to keep me from myself
I will keep moving forward when I have nothing left

I am not and will not be defeated
I've given everything in my life for this
But I am not and will not be defeated
I've given everything in my life for this







I just want to feel something
I just want to feel something new

I feel like I'm stuck in this routine
Every day is decided before I wake
Every dream that I've dreamt I don't want to chase
All the people I've met, I start forgetting their names

(Since I lost it all and had to move back in with my mom I spend everyday looking and failing to find a new job, and all my old friends are no longer my friends, and the girl is gone from my life completely)

The whole day just blurs into one picture
And months later, there are collections of copies
Everything looks the same
Everything feels the same

I feel like I'm stuck in this routine
Every day is decided before I wake
Every dream that I've dreamt I don't want to chase
All the people I've met, I start forgetting their names

And they forget mine and I give them no blame
I'm so disconnected I don't feel the same
That I did when we started
When I knew what my heart held

(I am not the same person since I met her and its and she is forgetting me and i her because I vanished out of nowhere)

So what does my heart hold now?
Is it something else or am I too blind to see I'm still the same?
I know I still hold close the same things I always have
But this world crashes down on me and I can only think about the weight
Instead of those who were always there to help me hold it up

You have always been there to help me hold up this earth
Every time it weighs me down

(She was my best friend and helped me get through so much)

I need to break out of this routine
Everyday is decided when I say
Every dream that I've dreamt I am gonna chase

All the people I've met in every different place
I hold them all close and support their dreams
I feel so connected, now I am the same
That I was when we started
When I knew what my heart held

Everything looks the same
Everything feels the same
You've always been there to help me hold up this earth



K so the things in parenthesis are what I think my subconscious might have associated the songs with judging from what I dreamed about. I just used this to vent in a way. another weird thing is that these songs are all in a row on the album and I didn't even know what song they were I had to go find them, I haven't had the C.D. long and hardly listen to it.

This dream is making me think really hard about life.