Thread: Unseen Wombat's Dream Journal

Well, I managed to get lucid last night after an epic struggle to fall asleep late in the morning, and also to remember all the dreams I had previously. Nothing came easy last night, even though I took the 8mg Galantamind. I managed to spontaneously recall 2 dreams after having forgotten that I even had dreamed.

I'm not sure it was the Galantamind that really caused me to get lucid, though I'm sure it didn't hurt. I didn't get lucid until the very end of my sleeping, at like 9:30.

The Dreams:

The first two dreams I had forgotten, but somehow managed to recall them when I got into the bathroom to take my Galantamind. In the first, I was watching a commercial with Garfield. He was talking about Bic mechanical pencils. He said something like "We like the ______. But we give Odie the 'Tahoma.'" (It was a red colored regular Bic pencil). Then Garfield snipped the pencil in half with some scissors and gave it to Odie. He said, "It uses the same lead as regular pencils, but can't be chewed."

I remember a little more of the second dream. I lived in Missouri, and I owned some land where I was going to build a house. (This is slightly similar to real life, except our land is in Wellington, Ohio). I was learning about the history of the area, about the Indians who used to live there and the geology, I only remember that the rocks under the soil were grey. Anyway, I was hoping that the land I had would be big enough to put in two streets. I wanted to give the streets weird names. I forget exactly what it was, but I was going to name them after a city, but I was going to divide the first word into two parts. Like Kan Sas Street and City Street. I wanted to do this because in that city there was a buddhist dream shrine. I thought it would be so cool then to name the streets after that plasce.

After I woke up, I took the Galantamind and used the toilet. I WBTB and fell right to sleep. I slept for two hours and only remembered one dream. I didn't feel the usual wakefulness that I usually get from the Galantamind. I waited a full week since I last took it, so I don't think I'm getting tolerant of it. I did have a little rum last night, so that may have had an effect. I don't usually drink, and I noticed my vision got blurry right as I was drinking it, so I think I may have had too much.

During this two hours, I had a dream that I only vaguely remembered the tail part of. It was very long actually, but I lost it upon waking. I remember that I lived in a mansion, and there was this book in the library room that was dangerous. We took it off the shelf and put a note in the empty space that said it could be found in our bedroom. It was a very thick book and took as much space as three smaller books. I don't know why it was dangerous, but in the dream we had kids and didn't want them reading it.

In the last dream of the night, I got lucid. I woke up after that 2 hours and tried to WILD with my meditation engine. It didn't work, but I did get some vibrations in my eyes. I then had an hour left to get lucid. I didn't have much hope, but decided to remain positive, and thought that I had gotten lucid in less time than that before. I was almost awake, but managed to get to sleep and had my lucid.

In the dream, or shortly after waking, I thought it might be a VILD, but no, it was a DILD, because I can remember an early part of it where I was non-lucid. Anyway, I came home from somewhere, and told my wife that I was going to the rec center to shower. I think this was so that I wouldn't have to clean the tub afterwards, but maybe because in the dream I just thought that going out to shower was unique and unusual and therefore, cool. So, I was walking down the street, then suddenly I was in the rec center. There were tons of people there. There were treadmills and locker rooms and exercise equipment, but surprisingly, there were very few showers. I thought there would be some private ones somewhere, but the only one I saw was right in the locker room and open to everyone's view. I was walking around with no pants on though, and was only vaguely bothered by it.

I went to the room with all the treadmills and there were mostly kids in there. I guess a PE class was going on in there, because a teacher was sitting in the corner with someone else writing notes about the students. They were deciding who would be permitted to go outside for the next class. I got on a treadmill and was fiddling with the speed control which was a lever in the front right. There was no control panel like on most treadmills, just the lever. I was having a hard time getting it to the speed I wanted.

I was suddenly lucid, I didn't even notice the transition. I thought the dream had started right at that point, and it may well have. I was slipping in and out of consciousness, because this was the last dream of the morning, and I was sleeping very very lightly. I thought in the dream that if I focused on the walking motion and the feel of the treadmill, I wouldn't be reminded of my physical body and would be able to make the dream more real. So I focused on walking, and it worked. I then thought, this is not very interesting; I need a sexy nurse here.

Instantly, a beautiful woman in a sexy nurse's outfit carrying a clipboard walked in front of me from the left. She was taking notes about me. She was blonde, had very large fake breasts, and looked exactly like I wanted, like a pornstar. I think we talked about something, I'm not sure, but then I said, "So why don't we do it right here?"

She said, "Well, because you can control everything." (Haha, I didn't expect that). I said, "So what," and got off the front of the treadmill and started taking off her clothes. She then said, "Because I have a new piece of jewelry that has an edge sticking out." It was like an anklet or something.

I ignored her and we started doing it. She then gave up on her objections and got into it. In the middle of it, I was on the bottom and I was suddenly looking at it in third person. In the dream, I thought, "Hey! I don't want third person!" I watched for a moment, and I was a pretty handsome bloke, I must say. I was wearing my silver necklace and looked like I had just gotten a haircut. I still couldn't shake the feeling though that it wasn't really me, but someone else, and I didn't want that.

Here it gets more naughty. Highlight the following text if you want to read: I took her over to a couch along the back wall. All this time, I didn't even recognize that there were other people in the rec center. I guess I didn't really care, because I was lucid. She sat down and this is the only point where I actually remember putting my penis into her and focusing on it. It wasn't very good, and wasn't very realistic. Definitely not like my other lucids, where I actually felt like I was there. But anyway, she was sitting on the couch and had her legs closer together, and I was on top with my legs apart, and it was difficult for me to get into her. She kept saying to go faster and harder, and I was having a hard time even keeping it inside of her because of the awkwardness of the position. When she said that, she had the voice of my wife, which is funny, because she was very obviously blonde and American, and my wife is Asian.

It was at this point that it spontaneously came into my head that I was dreaming and I thought about my body laying in bed. I tried to push it out, but it was too late and I felt myself become more and more aware of my physical self. I tried to DEILD back into the dream, but I was too awake. I tried a little later to VILD, visualizing the same woman giving me oral sex, and it worked for a few moments, but not very long at all, so I'm not really sure if I ever got into the REM phase, or if I was just having a very realistic daydream.

I think I'll try the galantamind again tonight with no rum before bed. I am getting lucid more often, so I'm making great progress. It took me almost a month I think after my first ones to get lucid again, then like two weeks, and now I've had 3 in a week. Two realistic ones and one sexy but less realistic. I'm happy with that.

Last night, I took 1 Galantamind and 1 310 mg Choline. As usual, I had no lucids from this. It didn't even keep me awake, which is unsurprising, since even 8 mg the night before didn't keep me awake. I had one dream that I bothered to remember. I had many others, but tried to DEILD, unsuccessfully, so I forgot them all.

The Dream: I was not myself in this dream. I was in a movie and was Gary Sinise. I don't know why, I've hardly ever seen any movies with him in it. Anyway, I lived in the woods. I was in exile because the person who was my wife in the movie had locked me in a rather large cage out there to die. I did die, but was somehow reincarnated. I saw my grave there in the cage, and my grave marker was a vulture skeleton. I had killed that vulture and ate it. Someone had asked me if it was appetizing, and I said it was better than the alternative, or something like that.

The reason I was in exile and had been locked in the cage was because there was an alien invasion. I was intimidated by the aliens just like everyone else, but I didn't want to kill the one that was with me. So my wife locked me in this cage.

The aliens were small, and shaped like an ear. One alien went to each person and I guess tried to control them. The person had to carry them around, but they had powers though. Like there was this little black ball that sometimes appeared next to them. I think it controlled the persons mind with radio waves or something. There was also a spike that would sometimes come out of the earlobe, and if you were holding it, it would stick you and infect you. I guess then you would be a slave of the aliens.

I can't remember much else than that. I didn't really expect to get lucid 2 nights in a row, but I hoped for it. Oh well, tonight, I'm not taking anything. Later this week, maybe Tuesday night, I'll try some GABA, but not as much as last time for sure.

1-28-08

I didn't write in my journal yesterday, not because I didn't remember any dreams, but because I was stressed out most of the day. The stress started right before sleep Sunday night, and I'm surprised I remembered anything at all, yet I do.

The Dreams:

In the first dream, I worked at Home Depot. I wanted to drive the forklift, but they wouldn't let me. Vince was there, and he was driving the forklift. I put some boards on the forks for I don't know what reason. That's about all I remember of that one.

In the next dream, I was at work. I got an assignement from CS to go out to this trailer park or housing development and take some measurements or something. I took careful notes and I didn't want to mess anything up, because I wanted to do a good job. TF was with me out there, and when we came back to work the next day, I asked him some questions that I thought were very intelligent, but I don't remember what they were. I went to the lobby of where I worked, which was completely different from the actual lobby. It was this room and there were all these black ladies in there. (Missed dreamsign again). They had on matching grey T Shirts that said "Really Black" with a yellow, elliptical logo on them. I asked one of them something and she walked out of the room to find out whatever it was.

In the last dream, I was in the Cloverfield movie, or what I thought it would be like, because I haven't seen it. This was the longest dream of the night, and surprisingly, I remember quite a bit. I remember looking at extreme close-ups of this guy and a woman getting into a helicopter, and watching them as the helicopter took off. The next thing I can remember is that I was standing on top of this passenger train with the same guy. It was night, and there were about 300 other people standing on the roof of the train with us. The guy jumped off with the same woman and left me in charge. I was the closest to the front of the train. There were these plastic tarps on top of the train, and there were plastic bands holding them down. The guy told me before he left to make sure the tarps didn't get torn. After he left, I heard a voice say, "Don't trust him," So I started ripping off the first band and tarp.

I soon realized I should have trusted him, because now the tarps were blowing off and causing people to fall off the train. I remember hanging on to one of the plastic bands, trying to keep from falling.

Then I was in this room with the director of the movie and Tom Cruise. I was the director's assitant. Tom Cruise had two assistants and he was criticizing the movie. They were like on a talk show or something. They didn't talk though, but wrote their comments on long pieces of paper and set them on the table in front of them. They then took break from the debate and left me in the room alone with the two assistants. One of the assistants said, "Let's discuss _______." The other one said, "No, let's discuss _______." They started writing their points on pieces of paper and attached them to the table with C-clamps. I was just observing this. They also posted these photographs up on this lighted x-ray board, or it may have been a tall monitor.

I don't know what they wrote, but the one posted a picture of a huge black cat and only a few other things. The other posted a ton of pictures of sad Mexicans in jail in various mood evoking lightings. Some of them were flashing slowly. One picture was of a pregnant Mexican woman. It was captioned "Born not Hatched," in Spanish. The guy was obviously an illegal sympathizer.

I then posted my response to their pictures. It was kind of like an internet forum. To the first guy, I wrote "That cat was HUEG! Awesome!" To the second guy, I wrote "Get your emo bull**it faggotry out of here."

Then my alarm woke me up.

1-29-08

Though yesterday was less stressful than the day before, I remembered only one dream. I know that I dreamed more, and have a vague recollection of it, but don't remember any details at all.

The Dream: So, in the only dream I remember, I was watching this basketball game. There were three teams playing simultaneously, which was weird. There was a red team, a blue team and a grey team. (The color grey seems to show up in my dreams a lot. I wonder if maybe it's a dream sign).

I was going to school to learn how to be a coach, but I wasn't happy with the program. I was researching different schools so I could transfer out. I wanted to go somewhere close, and I remember saying that I thought Youngstown State might be good.

That's it. Pretty pitiful.

1-30-08

I tried the GABA again last night, and the results were pitiful. I had only three dreams that I remember after taking it and they were short, disjointed, and not lucid at all. I did feel the tingles in my hands, though not in my face, and not nearly as intense as the first time I took it, when I got sick. I felt them when my hands were under the electric blanket, then when I turned the blanket off, they went away. I'm not sure if it was the dose, or if the heat had something to do with it. I only took 5 pills this time, and in the middle of the night, when my stomach is asleep, it's a chore to down 5 pills and water.

I was actually afraid to take them, because I thought I might get sick. I was going to take 6, but decided to play it safe. I think I need more, unless the heating blanket has something to do with it.

The Dreams: I dreamed I was out on the great plains or something, and I was herding animals. I think it was mainly cows, but I mostly remember the goats. They were in a separate field from the other animals and my recall begins when I went over there to see about the babies. There was this one tiny baby goat. It was only like 6 inches long, but looked like a fully formed adult goat. I saw goat poop all over, little black pellets, and I think the tiny baby may have done a little too when I picked him up.

In the next dream, which I don't even remember where it started and the other one ended, I was in a classroom learning about fencing. My old fencing instructor was there, and so was Hulk Hogan. I remember being surprised that he could afford to have Hulk Hogan there. It seems a few days passed like this and Hulk Hogan stopped coming. I found out that he hadn't been getting paid much for this and couldn't afford to stay on. There was another guy who was supposed to come, but he never showed up.

In the last dream, (Again, I don't know when it began and the other ended), I was looking through some old things and found some twenty dollar bills. They were all stacked together and were somehow folded like we used to fold notes to deliver to girls when I was in high school. I had written notes to Vince on these and I wondered what they said. I also found a stack of one dollar bills in the same arrangement.

I guess we were in a hurry to go somewhere, because my mom sounded irritated and asked me if I was ready yet. I got irritated too and told her to hold on, I wanted to see what was on these notes first. I had written on the back of them I guess. I don't know what I wrote though.

A couple memories that were the ultimate in disjointed and random, I don't even remember which dream they were a part of: I went to an amusement park. I think with Vince. In another disjointed dream, I was at my old Sunglass Hut. They had strobe lights for halloween.

Man my recall was a mess last night.

1-31-08
It's my birthday today.

Wow, last night, I remembered so many dreams, I couldn't believe it. Sadly, none were lucid, though I don't know how I managed to stay oblivious to all the crazy stuff that was going on. Last night for dinner I had a tuna sandwich at Subway, because I heard tuna was great for vitamin b6, and that fish is good for memory in general. It certainly worked last night, because when I woke up at 4:30 to take my Galantamind, I had already had like 3 or 4 very long, detailed dreams. I even remembered a lot of the details. I wrote down a ton of notes and didn't even write down everything I remembered because I would have been up too long.

I should mention that I also went to bed unusually confident for some reason last night. I was doing reality checks throughout the day and felt for sure that I would become lucid. Remembering Sunday night, when I heard the sound of wood hitting the floor during my half-hearted early WILD, I also tried to WILD right at the begining of the night last night. It didn't get me anything this time, but I did have all these long non-lucids.

Unfortunately, the Galantamind didn't work today, which I attribute 100% to not being able to sleep in long enough because of my damn job. I hate the thought that I may only be able to LD consistently on the weekends, though I have had some great LD's during the week.

The Dreams: Sigh, where to begin. Well, the first one I have written, was half-nightmare, half epic adventure. I was back in high school. I remember seeing a lot of people, walking around the hallways, talking with friends, though I don't remember about what. I was friends with some guys from the football team. They weren't people who I really had gone to school with, though that didn't make a difference in the dream. There was about an equal number of black guys (Missed dreamsign) and white guys. One now reminds me of Mayhem from the new American Gladiators, which I watched right before going to bed last night. (There were no blacks in my high school until I was a senior, when there was one black freshman). Everyone was really excited because there was going to be a football game after school or on the weekend or something. Anyway, I was actually there for the football game, though I didn't watch it. I was in the school.

After the game ended, things got crazy. I guess it was a very close or emotional game, because people started rioting. Actually, it was more like terrorists started shooting up the school. They were all around outside and were dressed in black with black ski masks. I was in a teacher's office and the door lock had been broken. I ran outside to try to escape and just managed to. I found out later that the teacher I had been with had been killed.

One strange thing about this is that the high school had like a quad, so it was more like my college than the high school. There were people, hostages, arranged in groups out on the quad, which was very similar to the one behind Wilker Hall at BW.

Anyway, apparently a week passed, and there was another football game. And, guess what, the same thing happened again. I was again in a teacher's office talking to him about something, when I noticed the door catch had been broken. I thought, "Oh no, it's happening again." The door opened directly onto the quad, and I ran out to try to escape before things got any worse. I made a point that next week, I wouldn't stay around for the football game. I saw a terrorist come out of, I guess, Wilker Hall, though the door looked more like the back door of my old elementary school, and he shot someone in the head with a machine gun. I knew I wouldn't make it out alive, so I ran to the center of the quad where a group of hostages were being held and surrendered myself. I went in there with them. There were a bunch of trees, and there was this middle-aged Asian Indian woman who was the leader of the hostages. She was talking to and comforting people who were sitting there. Terrorists were standing guard on the tree-wells with their machine guns.

Apparently, we were released, because the next thing I knew, I was in this dorm common room with the football players. We were in hiding from the terrorists. We weren't at the school though anymore, it was actually more like a ski lodge. There were video games in a room to the side and most of us were just lounging on the chairs in there.

I remember two guys, who were white, were trying to pretend that they were black. I guess to confuse the terrorists if they should show up. They were in this disguise that they both got into that made them seem like one person instead of two. One of the two got sick of it I guess and got out of the disguise and stopped talking like he was black. The other guy was distressed by this.

I'm not sure if the next part is part of the same dream or if it's new. But now the football players were gone, and I was in a mall, though it still reminded me of the ski lodge. I think the two might have been different parts of the same building. There was this thing there for sale. It was a triangular platform with three wheels. It was kind of like a huge skateboard. In the dream, these things had been a big fad like a year before or something, but weren't popular anymore. I still liked it and bought one. I took it out into the parking lot, where a lot of people were standing around at the edges, chatting and relaxing. I got a plastic bag and started to windsurf on the triangular skateboard. It was actually a lot of fun, but I wasn't so great at it because it was the first time trying it.

In another part of the same dream, the parking lot was a beach. There was this shark and a guy who were friends I guess. Another shark stole the guy's car antenna and went into the ocean with it. The two friends went to get it back. The friendly shark had another antenna and was having a hard time holding it under his fins. He was going to use it to retrieve the car antenna. The guy went under the water to try to kill the shark who stole it. They ended up being unsuccessful. I thought this was stupid because it would make better sense for the guy to try to retrive the antenna, and for the shark to go kill the other shark since he could swim under water better and the guy had hands to hold the antenna.

In the final dream before my WBTB, I can't believe the craziness of it all didn't make me lucid. But, like usual, it all seemed perfectly normal. I was looking at this guy. He was that actor from American Beauty. I can't remember his name right now. He was in the park at night, and somehow found something that gave him supernatural abilities at accounting. He became what my dream called, "The Economator." He went to work as the accountant for Santa Claus, who was really Tim Allen. Just like in the movies.

They were sitting at this big table with a bunch of people, or elves, I'm not sure. I was there too. I had to then go and get some accounting stuff from this hotel. I remember going to this big, nice, fancy hotel, but it ended up that that was the wrong one. I went to this cheap crappy motel with outside corridors and that was where I was supposed to go. While there, I met the Declaration of Independence, who was this rolled up scroll with cartoon googly eyes and little legs and arms. I found out that he was supposed to be the accountant for Santa Claus, and the Economator was like a bad guy or something. The Declaration of Independence didn't know this though, but finally found out, or was convinced or something, and we both walked into Santa's meeting room again. The Economator looked really guilty when he saw the Declaration of Independence, because he knew he was caught.

Then I got up and took the Galantamind. I tried to WILD, but didn't have my meditation engine, so I think that screwed me up. I was also up a full 15 minutes writing down notes on all the previous dreams. I only got mild vibrations over the next two hours and fell asleep a couple times.

Strangely, I remember much less about the dreams I had after the WBTB than the ones before. I do remember it was a pretty long continous dream, but what exactly happened, I've forgotten. At one point I woke up and tried to DEILD, but couldn't keep lucidity, so the dream reverted to a non-lucid. Another strange thing is that the Galantamind didn't wake me up after an hour like it did the first couple times. This happened on Sunday as well. I don't know why this is. I hope I'm not getting a tolerance to it.

In the dream, I was in China. I don't know how I knew this, because everyone was American and speaking English. I was in a factory or something. There was this big cutting blade that was shaped sort of like a railroad rail, but was about 4 feet tall, blue and was really flexible. These workers, who I talked to and found very interesting, put it onto this machine that would resharpen it. There was a 10" circular saw blade mounted on the wall, and the railroad blade was pulled past it as it spinned. This cut grooves into the rail blade and apparently made it sharp again. I felt it after it had been sharpened, and it felt rough, like the edge of a tiling trowel, but not really sharp. I guess it was for like cutting rock or something, because even though it was made entirely of this flexible steel, I got the impression that it cut like a diamond blade.

And that's pretty much all I remember. I'm definitely going to have fish this weekend before trying my GABA or Galantamind. I'll probably take the GABA first, to give today's Galantamind an extra day to wear off. I hope I can do it without getting sick. I think I should be okay taking 6 or 7 pills, because I'll be able to sleep in.

2-1-08

Pretty crappy recall last night for some reason. I did forget to take my vitamin, and I ate way too much for dinner for my birthday. The one I recall though is from before my WBTB, so that's pretty interesting.

I did recall one relatively short one after the WBTB, but I didn't write it down, so now I've forgotten it.

The Dream: I was at work. It was pretty dark, and I got the impression that we were there at night. The place didn't look much like the real office, but in the dream of course, I thought it was. People I actually knew, JS, JG, MB who is about to retire, the big shot who's not the president, but sits down the hall from him, and I think JT were there. They were mostly just walking around talking to one another, but I also talked to some of them. They looked and sounded just like the real life people. It sucks that I have to be at work even in my dreams.

It was a holiday or something. Or maybe it was stormy outside, I think that was probably it and would explain why it was dark. I was in this section where there were lots of shelves and books. It was like a library. I think I was looking for some technical magazine for my job or something. Someone told me that they were going to let us go home early. I was like, "Oh boy," and was really happy.

And that's about it. I really should have written notes on both dreams down, then I would have remembered more. Oh well, it's not like they were really exciting or anything. Still, writing helps my recall, I'm sure.

Tomorrow is the day to OD on GABA. I'm also going to get me some fish oil today because I'm convinced fish helps my recall, but I'm not crazy about eating it. Except for tuna, a little. Maybe I'll get some 5-HTP too. I need to read up on what Yuschak recommends to use with the Galantamine. I think that's it.

2-2-08

I had a bunch of supplements yesterday and last night. I’m not really surprised that my dreams and recall were a mess. I took 2 grams of fish oil after dinner, then one 50 mg 5-HTP right before bed. I woke up after 5.5 hours and took 8 mg Galantamind. I remember 1 dream from before the WBTB, though not a whole lot of details. I had a bunch of dreams afterwards, but only bothered to remember 2 of them.

The Dreams:

After I took the Galantamind, I tried to WILD by remaining completely still and keeping my mind completely aware. I read in a thread here that that was supposed to work. Well, it didn’t. I did get a lot of HI, and I think I felt pretty heavy at a couple points, but I felt zero vibrations and had no lucids from it. I laid with my meditation engine for an hour, then for like 30 minutes, then for another hour and got nowhere. I finally decided to try to sleep for a DILD, and I guess I was successful, but the dreams were crappy and as soon as I became lucid, I immediately woke up to what looked like strobe lights behind my eyes. It was super trippy.

So before the WBTB, I had another dream about my old friend Danielle. I went over her house to visit. She was there with two friends and we were hanging out in her bedroom. In the dream, she was the daughter of the company president where I work, and I think she may have ran away from home and was just there without him knowing it. Even though we were in the bedroom, it wasn’t a sexual dream. Just like we were in real life, we were just friends. Besides, in the dream, she seemed much younger than me.

In another part of the same dream, I think, I went out to see Vince. He was at some guy’s house who he knew. He told me that when he got there, the guy asked him to do some kind of major renovation project on his house, then the guy acted scared of him. Vince then said, "And the guy is literally twice as big as me!"

After I took the Galantamind, I had a ton of short, short dreams, or maybe they’re better called HI from my WILD attempts. When I gave up and went to sleep, I had two relatively long dreams, though nowhere near the length of my usual dreams, even though I usually forget half of them, I know my usual dreams are of epic lengths. I guess these were technically lucids, since at the end of them, I did say, “Hey, I’m dreaming.” But strobe lights immediately came on and the dream eventually faded. The strobing lasted maybe 10 to 15 seconds and was pretty cool, though it was disappointing when the dream ended.

So, in the first one, I was both alternately playing Tomb Raider, and alternately acting as Lara. I was riding on this cannon and was fighting this giant walking machine. I was doing poorly until I maneuvered the cannon underneath its body and shot it several times. I must have been playing Tomb Raider: Legend, because I had to hit several buttons during cut-scenes. The buttons were labeled 1,2 X and O. I didn’t understand this at first. I was expecting square and triangle, and I failed once or twice to hit 1. I eventually got it though.

In the last dream, I was at this McDonalds. The cashier was in something that looked like our shower at home. There was a little computer touch screen on the water knobs that she took the order on. I paid her with a gift card and my mom and wife came in behind me. I was talking to them and not really paying attention to the cashier. She said something about the gift card not having any money or not enough. I was still talking to them, so I just gave her some cash. I finally finished talking and turned to get my change. She told me I still owed like $10.17 or something. I was now getting irritated.

2-3-08

Tried the GABA last night. I got no lucids, just the tingles and got really hot. I recalled absolutely nothing from before the WBTB, even though I took 2g of fish oil before bed. I guess maybe it was just a fluke that I had such great recall those other times I ate fish, or maybe it was something else that's in the fish, but not the fish oil, maybe b6.


The Dream: I was at work, but my cat, Draba was with me. (This might make work a little more bearable IRL. I wish I could bring him with me). I vaguely remember we were in my cubicle, and there was a rolling chair. Also, the building I was working in was much taller than the actual building.

Then I went out to lunch without my cat, and I guess met my mom and wife. After I left them, I saw them crossing the street. I made a wrong turn, and was like two blocks away. I was making a U turn, when I saw them crossing the street again. I found this odd, but was more worried they'd see I had went the wrong way and looked like a dummy. So, there was the first missed lucid opportunity.

Then I was back at the office, and was walking when I heard this crippled guy I work with talking to someone else. I walked through the room they were in. It was like a copy area. I was wearing a white Indian's jersey and they were both wearing the same red Indian's t-shirt. The guy I don't know said that I looked like someone's mother with my white shirt. I got mad and said, "Why don't you try to say something polite." I looked at them again, and now they were wearing red tie-dyed shirts. I thought this was strange, even in the dream, but didn't get lucid. That was the second missed opportunity.

I then found a coin in the office somewhere. It was a penny, and I guess the mint was doing a new series of coins, because these had a state, and the date the state ratified the constitution. I listened to a story about some guy who found a valuable coin then sold it really cheap. I don't really remember any details though.

Then I was at home. We were spray painting the part of the garage wall next to the door. We had a heater running. I was trying to explain to my mom that the heater would make the paint rise, and it wouldn't turn out good.

Then I fed my cats. In the dream I had four of them even thought IRL we only have three. I think the odd one may have been Stray, my cat when I was little, who died a long time ago now.

2-4-08

Only two dreams remembered from last night, but they were of epic length, and I did manage to recall quite a few details. All I had was my vitamin as far as supplements last night.

The Dream: I had written this book about a cat. I wasn’t really writing though, as in sitting in front of a computer; I was acting out the plot as the cat. Though I don’t remember actually being the cat. I was still me. I know, it makes no sense. Anyway, I was in the woods at one point, and I remember walking around this stream on the rocks. At another point, the cat put his front paws in a pair of slippers. There was also a big green bug, like a caterpillar that had sharp teeth and was friends with the cat. That’s all I really remember of writing the book.

I had somehow become famous because of this though, and I guess people were watching me as I was creating the book. I had come to the end, and had left the woods and was now standing on this road that sloped gradually downward. Kristy, my old manager from Sunglass Hut, was coming toward me. She was a tour guide and was bringing people to see me when I came out of the woods. She didn’t see me standing there, and said to the people behind her (who I didn’t see), “This is where he’s going to come out.” I waved and said, “No, here I am! I’m already done!” I felt an even bigger sense of accomplishment for having finished before everyone thought I would.

I was standing on the street and a guy from Purina cat food came up to me. He was snooty and British. Purina and Friskies were both courting me to get my endorsement. Friskies had apparently already contacted me. Both reps gave me a box with cat poop in it and a big compressed square of dried cat poop. I guess this was so I could compare the quality of the food somehow. :crazy: The snooty British guy said to me as he gave me these things, “Our food is better than Friskies.” I looked at what he had given me and the box was my tool box that I keep my hammers in. There was cat poop all over them. :yuck:

After this, I was back at the old trailer. Draba was sitting in the carport outside of the screen room. I was upset that he had gotten outside. We went inside and were then in the house we live in now. We were in the living room, and Draba put his paws in my wife’s slippers just like the cat in my book did.

Then, I woke up and went right BTB and had another dream. I was at this high school that was very prestigious. I had had a hard time getting in there, and I think it was difficult for my mom to afford it, but I made it in. We were walking around the grounds. There were a lot of other people there and I think we all had maroon jackets for uniforms. I remember one or both of us were riding bicycles.

We met this old guy on the path there and he was talking to my mom, who for some reason, in the dream, was a man. They were talking about me and me going to school here. He gave her something, and I remember having seen him do the same thing before. I hadn’t asked what it was because I was afraid to, but now I finally did. It was part of his own hand. The skin between his thumb and index finger was very thick and he had cut off part of it to give to her. He wasn’t bleeding though. It was like he was made out of wet silly putty. The piece of his hand was his “individuality,” and he was giving it to her to give to me somehow. I realized that individuality was very important to the people who decided who got into the high school.

Now this is really unusual, but in this dream, which I’m pretty sure was a different one from the previous, I remember thinking to myself that having his individuality was the reason I was able to write that book about the cat and become famous. Wow. That’s the first time for me that separate dreams have referenced one another.

After we left the guy, we went down to the end of the path where there was a park and were standing beside a picnic table. My mom gave me a sack full of food to take to have at lunchtime. All I remember was there was a piece of bread in there. She had a sack of her own lunch too, and I saw she had a piece of brown bread, like the kind they have at Outback.

My mom asked me if I had any money for the “Navy vending machines.” She then gave me two quarters, and I guess put them into my cell phone. I was irritated that she did that, because my cell phone now dialed one of my speed dial numbers. It was some guy in Texas that I guess was a contact at work. He answered “_______ Arbuckle.” I was irritated and said to my mom, “Who did we even call?” and the guy on the phone responded, more angrily, “This is ________ Arbuckle!” I said I was sorry that I had accidentally hit his number on speed dial. Then my alarm rang and I woke up.

2-5-08

Absolutely nothing last night. I vaguely remember that right before waking I had a dream that my cats were in. But that’s it. I tried taking a B complex vitamin, with like 1000% DV of b6 and b12 last night a couple hours before bed. Apparently b6 and b12 aren’t so sure-fire. Neither was fish oil, so I don’t know what caused me to have such good recall those nights I ate tuna or tilapia. Maybe it was just a coincidence. Tonight it’s Galantamind, and it’s a good night for it. I’m out in the field tomorrow for work (yay!), so I can sleep in like an extra half hour to 45 minutes.

2-6-08Last night was pretty cool. I didn't recall anything before waking at 4:30, and was really disappointed about that. I had taken one fish oil pill last night before dinner, so it was much earlier than usual. I hoped this would have some effect, but I don't think it did.

After the WBTB though, I had a great dream from listening to a LD preset from the BW Gen preset archive. It was called LD test preset or something like that. I turned it into an MP3 and put it on my PSP. All I did was to fall asleep listening to it and at about 6:15, I abruptly woke and remembered almost everything about the last dream. It wasn't a lucid, but it was really cool anyway.

The Dream: My wife, my mom and I (Those two are certainly a dreamsign. I see them so much IRL though, that I don't know if doing an RC every time I see them would help. I suppose it's worth a try), were on a weekend trip to Santa Claus's house. It wasn't any toy making workshop or at the north pole with candy canes and elves, it was just a really large house that we were staying in with Santa Claus. He was like you expect him to look, he was a big guy and had grey hair and a short grey beard, but he wasn't wearing the red suit. We were there for the weekend, but I don't really remember what we did. But the last day, right before we had to go back, I was annoyed that we were going to have to pack up all our stuff. Apparently, we had brought every single thing we owned there. But first we were going to have dinner. I went to Santa's room and he was getting ready for Christmas. His room was freezing. He said that he made it like that so he would be used to the cold when he went out in his sleigh. He had been doing it for hundreds of years, I knew. He said that only the first three years he did it had he kept warm before going out and he didn't make that mistake again after.

So I asked him where he wanted to have dinner, and he didn't mind, so I said we'd like to go to Subway. This old guy, who was apparently also staying over at Santa's house came in the room, and he wasn't able to go with us because his toes were messed up. He had an extra big toe growing out of the side of each of his regular big toes. I knew in the dream that that was what happened to old guys, but his extra toe was really big and I guess painful to him.

So me and Santa went out and he showed me his workshop. It was out in front of our actual garage, and was a bench with a sewing machine on it. He was really proud of it because it ran on a car battery. I asked him how he made that work because the battery was DC current, and he said he had taken some wiring out of an air hockey table and plugged it into that first, then the battery. He showed it to me.

Then I guess my mom and wife had finished getting ready to go to dinner and came outside. My grandpa, who died a little over four years ago, was also there, but didn't say anything. We were going to take two cars. and I was about to get in the car with my mom and wife, but Santa asked me to help him with the key to the car. It was made of red wax and had stretched and distorted in the keyhole. He didn't really need any help, but he wanted to ask me to sit in front with him so we could talk. The car was divided, like a limousine, I guess, and people in the back were separated from people in the front.

So we were driving then, and I guess Santa asked me what I wanted to do with my life, or he might have asked me outright why I wanted to be rich. I don't remember. But I do remember telling him everything that I really feel in real life. I told him I didn't really care about having money for money's sake, or even for having fancy, expensive things. (I remember seeing a pretty realistic vision of three large diamonds at this point). I told him, (and I'm paraphrasing), I want money so that I don't have to get up at 6:00 in the f***ing morning to go to a place that I hate to be and waste my entire life there. I remember saying they ruin my whole day. They take the best part of the day from me. I also said that I would really be perfectly happy having just a modest place to live, and to live a modest life, but just not have to work every day, but, we're about to build a really big fancy house, (mostly thanks to my wife's salary), and I said, "But you know, I'm married, and my wife wants a big house, and we're gonna have kids, which will cost money too. So, you know, what can I do?" (That's not entirely true, I really like the house we're building). He nodded and seemed to understand. And I think he seemed to think my reasons were good reasons for wanting to be rich.

Then we were following this van. It pulled into this driveway of a pretty crappy-looking home, and there were like 4 cars parked in an area in front, blocking the driveway around the side. Somehow, the van made it through, but when we got there, there was no way our car could squeeze between the house and the other cars. Santa then got out. I knew he had to go in and see the people who lived there, but he leaned back in the car and said something like, "Okay, go to the website you always go to (I guess he meant this one), and I'll write you a response there."

Then I abruptly woke up, remembering all this, and I wrote it down. I had a strong feeling there, still half asleep, that I had really been talking not to Santa, but to God. I know a lot of you probably don't believe that, but I know God has visited people in dreams before, so I'm not sure.

So God, if you're reading this, I'm here waiting for your response.

2-8-08

Last night I again took my autosuggestion seriously. I should really be doing it throughout the day as well. Again I remembered a lot of dreams, though most were really short. None of the length of the Santa Claus dream of several days ago.

The Dreams: My first dream was a nightmare. I was in this hospital or something. My wife and I were in a crowd of people about to get on an elevator. (That's the second time I had a scary dream with an elevator). This girl who we knew called to us to wait for her. I think it was my old girlfriend Jenny H. Her face had these either pink marks or pink tatoos. They looked like the makeup that KISS wears, but pink. We got in the elevator with her and went down into the basement. I guess earlier, I had a premonition, or saw a video of her turning into a giant housefly and killing me and her family. When we got to the basement, there were 2 doctors waiting for her around an exam or operating table. She said, "I don't really believe I'm going to turn into a fly and kill you and my family."

She laid down on the table, and the doctors split her face open down the middle. It was almost like a cast. Sure enough, underneath, she had the face of a giant housefly. It was really scary. She started chasing me around the operating table. The room was really small, like an elevator cab. I was jumping from one wall to the opposite wall as she ran behind me. I got so scared I forced myself awake.

(I don't think that counts as lucid. Because even though I willed myself awake, I never really became aware that I was dreaming).

My next dream was much shorter. I was back in high school. I had graduated a few months before, near the beginning of the school year, but wanted to go back just for the fun of it. I wondered if they would let me back in.

The next dream was almost a nightmare too. I was in this house. It was a little like Santa's house, only in that it was big and had natural wood grain trim. I was writing this diary and again, either had a premonition or saw a video of the last guy who wrote in the diary being cut in half lengthwise. He was all green and stringy inside and had green blood. I was kind of copying the diary and I remember part of it was to draw a green ace of spades. I figured I wouldn't make the same mistake as the other guy, I would draw the ace first. I did, but sure enough, right after I finished writing, this girl came out of the closet with a shovel. She was trying to attack me, so I picked up an aluminum snow shovel and hit her in the head a few times with it. I hit her solidly, but it didn't seem to really hurt her. Then we were in my basement and she was trying to pull the cats' water bowl over to her with the shovel. I wasn't sure what she was going to do with it, but I kept it away from her. I said, "I know you're going to try some mischief with it."

In the final dream, I was in a cafeteria at a mall, I think, with my wife and someone else. I was talking about dreams, of all things, and still managed to not get lucid. I said, referencing my first dream of the night, the nightmare, "I hope I don't have a bad one again." My wife then said that Lei, her friend in China, has bad dreams all the time.

2-10-08 I tried the Galantamind both nights this weekend. Neither got me lucid. I tried the autosuggestion before falling asleep and the WILD method of remaining completely still but not worrying about not focusing on my body.

On Saturday, I did better with the WILD. I think I was getting close to SP, and I think at one point I achieved it. I was listening to the "LD test preset and 12" which is supposed to be for WILDing. I felt floaty at least three times and twice I'm sure I noticed that I physically could not hear the earphones. At these points I could visualize a glowing ball in the center of my "vision." I really feel I was very close.

Last night I didn't do so well. I felt floaty a couple times, but not as good as Saturday.

One other interesting thing I learned on Friday while reading Astral Dynamics was the method of activating chakra's or something. I normally don't go for all that Eastern mysticism BS, but I definitely felt something when I visualized scratching the joint between the thumb and hand in a circle. I'll definitely read more of that book.

The Dreams: I was back in college again, and working for Larry at my old job. Rick was there too. I designed a bridge truss, and it took me a real long time. When I was finally finished, I gave it to Rick to look at and he seemed really irritated that I did it wrong. He said he thought I was going to use an "Ace truss chord," I had no idea what that was. (I still don't). I was reading in my steel manual trying to find out over the next few days. I found some comic strips in there that had something to do with engineering. I was going to keep looking for the Ace truss chord, but I got sidetracked by a Snoopy comic. I remember reading another one about an alien that had crash landed on a planet. There were about a dozen smaller aliens standing around his ship. They were singing about not being able to fix it and him being stuck there.

I never found out what an Ace truss chord was.

After I woke up, I tried to WILD. Like I said, I only felt floaty, and after an hour, I turned on my side and gave up. I fell asleep half-heartedly trying to remain still. I thought my mom woke me up to go to Marc's (a discount grocery store in northeast Ohio). I remember continuing to try to WILD while walking through the store. I was actually doing pretty good and could kick myself for not doing a reality check. At some point I lost even that little bit of not-really-lucidity. I met JG from work up there. He was a little kid and was there with his brother and parents who were two women. I was like, OMG, they're lesbians. They were arguing, and JG seemed embarrassed that we were there listening to it. One said, "You're not going to have your meeting tonight." Because of something that happened earlier. The other woman got mad and said the kids were having a catfight. The argument was pretty entertaining really. There was a walnut-colored cutting board on the top shelf in the aisle, and a wooden "Jacob's ladder" toy. I made a show of playing with the toy so I could stay there and listen to the argument. Then I really woke up and was so pissed that I didn't get lucid there.

2-11-08

I tried the 1000% B6 and B12 with a regular vitamin last night right before bed. Didn't work at all. I tried to autosuggest that I would know I'm dreaming and become aware I was dreaming. It didn't work, though the suggestion to remember my dreams seems to have worked a little. I woke to an alarm at 5:15 and listened to my LD test preset. Didn't work either. I remembered one dream from before the WBTB, but now I forgot it because I didn't write it down. I also remembered a pretty cool and fun dream from after.

The Dream: I was in this cemetery with these kids. They were part of a club or group that I had, in the dream, once been a part of. I was one of the original members and they were trying to restart the club. We had a secret hideout in the cemetery down a hole that was drilled into a headstone. It was really cool down there. We had like a whole underground house. I was above ground with several of them, and there was this old lady at the cemetery, I guess visiting someone's grave, but I don't know. One of the guys kept talking about the club or doing something to give away the secrecy of the hideout to the old lady. I was getting so irritated with him. Finally, I said something like, "I'm just going to tell her about it."

Like many of my other dreams, there was a lot more to this one that I have now forgotten. I really should write this stuff down immediately.

2-12-08

I tried the subliminal lucid 3.0 mp3 today. Didn't get lucid, but woke up several times during the night. I think after every dream.

The Dreams: In the first one, I was at the mall. I went into this software store, I guess, and these guys gave me a box with free software. I don't know what kind it was. I was then at Home Depot and wanted to buy 2 board feet of some kind of wood. Norm Abrams (famous woodworker on TV) was there. He seemed like kind of a jerk. He acted like he knew so much more than me, which is true, but he sounded really annoyed when he said, "Drop it," referring to the board. Dropping it shook off some sawdust. He told me I needed to check the moisture content of the wood in the sawdust.

I think I then had another dream that I didn't bother to remember because it was short.

My next dream was a pretty long one. I was in the park, walking down a path, and there was this pull-up bar across it. It was winter, but there were spider webs stuck to the bar and the posts. I guess it was because no one was using it because it was winter. I was going to hang from the bar, but i didn't want the spider webs on me. While I was standing there, a couple girls came up and asked if I wanted to play football. I said yes, and there were then these two Indian guys who came up from behind me. The girls asked them if they wanted to play too. I guess they said yes too. I had to wait though, and the Indian guys passed under the bar and went to play their game. I guess it came to be my turn. I was suddenly inside a building and JT from work was there. I don't know what happened for a while, because my handwriting on my notes is illegible. But the next thing that happened was the girl came back to us and said that JT's dad, who had been playing football in another room, had broken his hand. All his fingers were broken. He was also the height he was when he was 18 years old.

We wanted to go see him. JT was concerned, obviously. We walked through a door and were in a hospital room. It looked like the large exam room that I used to go to at the urgicare in Texas. A nurse said we weren't supposed to be back there, but we were like, the hell with that, and just walked right through. JT opened a medicine storage cabinet and walked inside. I was worried that it was a trap, but then realized it wasn't. I told him we really shouldn't be in the cabinet.

Then when we turned around and came out, everybody jumped out! It was a surprise party!

Then I woke up and was really satisfied that I had had a dream with a plot and an actual ending.

2-13-08

I tried the subliminal lucid 3.0 mp3 again. And again, I didn't get lucid. This time, I think I heard a guy whispering subliminal messages behind the music, but I couldn't make out what he was saying. Again, I woke up several times during the night, though I think I missed the first REM phase.

The Dreams: In the first dream I remember, I was a worker on the Great Wall of China. (I had just watched a 2 hour show on that last night before going to bed). We were on this level patch of dirt and had made a rectangular fight ring out of the large grey bricks we were using to build the wall. (They were like the size of 4x8x16 modern concrete blocks). The general was there, and there were a bunch of peasants. He told the peasants that if they could kill one of us, the soldiers, he'd give them $1000. I guess it was his way of punishing the soldiers who weren't even good enough to defend themselves against a peasant. So there were a whole bunch of us in the ring all at once, and a whole bunch of peasants, and we were all just walking around in there. The peasants had knives though, and one particular guy, who was really pretty big and intimidating was really out to get me. I knew he wanted to stab me in the belly. I was trying to avoid him.

In the next dream, I was in the olympics I guess. I ran a race and was at the home stretch, but I stood there and waited for a bunch of other guys to arrive, then when we were all there, we all ran and finished at the same time. I remember we all had on different colored uniforms.

In the last dream, I was on vacation with my mom and my wife. My mom wanted me to go to this youth group that was there, so me and my wife went. We went on a retreat I guess, and were in the park. We were sleeping on a picnic table. My wife was topless and was sleeping on the top of the table and I was sleeping on the bench. I had my arm up on the top and she put her breasts on top of it. In the dream, they were much larger than they are in real life. It seemed like this dream lasted a long time, but I don't remember many details.

I woke up this morning and could have sworn the clock on the dresser said 6:45. So I got out of bed and brushed my teeth. Then when I came back to the room to get dressed, the clock said 6:36. I was like OMG, OMG! Am I dreaming? I did about 6 reality checks, but no, I had just misread the clock I guess.

2-14-08

I didn't recall much last night. I didn't try the subliminal messages, but I did take one 5-HTP pill at 9:00. I think that stuff just screws me up. I don't get the REM rebound because by the time it's ready to do the rebounding, I'm up for my stupid job.

Anyway, I woke at 4:45 for my alarm, but was too lazy to do anything. I went back to bed, and had one dream I remembered only after getting up and thinking I hadn't recalled any.

The Dream:

I was in this grocery store, and was also at work. I guess shopping was my job. I had a shopping list and I was supposed to pick up some things. The only thing I remember on the list was a tub of butter, or maybe cream cheese. Anyway, JG from work was there, and just like in real life, he was sneaking around peering over my shoulder. I was not doing my job. I was looking at the things on the shelves and not concentrating on getting the items on my list. The shelves kept moving past me, from the right to the left. On the shelves, near the bottom, there was porn. Like magazines and videos I think. I was looking at this, (no, I don't look at porn at work), and JG snuck up behind me and caught me looking at it. I was embarrassed.

That's about it. I hope tonight is better. I did manage to try to DEILD after randomly waking in the middle of the night with no recall of any dream. I didn't get lucid, or even SP, but I did get some strong vibrations, even in my arms, and I think my feet, and I also felt a pulsating sensation in my head, just like I felt that time I WILDed from inside a dream. I think if I had been a little more awake I may have been able to get it.
2-15-08

In restaurant with pornstars

Like the title says, I was in this restaurant. In a back room or something, there were pornstars making a movie. I was back there watching for a while, then came up to the front. I was sitting in a booth next to the aisle with people I knew sitting on the other side at tables. It was kind of like the turning restaurant near Niagara Falls, but was on the ground, and wasn't curved. The tables were against the window, and the booths were against the wall. The place alternated between being a restaurant and a computer lab. I had a computer at my booth and there was porn on it! People kept looking over my shoulder. I thought about how sitting against the wall would be better because then people couldn't see my computer screen. Then I thought that sitting with your back to the aisle was better if you didn't want people to see you talk.

Driving past The House on the way to a pond

I was out in a car driving along this road, sort of like the one near that lake in Idaho we went to. On one side was a hillside, with a few houses, on the other, it was flat with a lot of houses. The car had a sunroof and I was putting my hand out the top and was grabbing leaves off branches as we drove by. Vince's friend Shay, who I haven't seen in about 10 years probably, was with us. I think my mom was driving and my wife was there too.

We were on our way to this neighborhood where there was a pond or a pool that we were going to swim in. Eventually we passed it on the road we were on. I could see it to the right through the houses. Around this time we also passed The House. Not just any house, but the one I have a dream about like once every few months. The one with all the secret passages and rooms behind bookshelves. In the dream, it belonged to Dale C., the farmer we bought our land from, and his wife. I pointed it out to Shay and said, "That was where we stayed." In the dream, I remembered having stayed there before, and having stood on the balcony.

Through the large front windows of the house, which took up almost the entire front, I saw the balcony again. It was right above the living room, and there were no stairs to it. It could only be reached from a room through the bookshelves to the left. Sitting downstairs, I saw Dale C. and his wife. They were watching TV I think.

Eventually we arrived at the pool/pond. There were pornstars in the parking lot. I remember thinking to myself that me and Shay were the best-looking guys there and had the best chance at picking one up. (I forgot that my wife was with me)! We were now sitting on the open back tailgate of an SUV taking off our shoes. My wife came up and was making statements loaded with sexual innuendo. My mom was standing right there, but totally didn't pick up on any of it.

That's all I remember. I hope next time I see The House, I'll remember it only exists in my dreams.

2-16-08

Last night was amazing. I got farther with WILD than I ever had before. The feelings were amazing. It was like being on a roller coaster. I wondered for a moment if I was going to see anything scary, but nothing turned up. I also had a bunch of long really detailed dreams. I only remembered four of them total, but I recalled a ton of details.

The preparation: I went to bed at 1:00 am, really stressed out. I was thinking I wouldn't recall anything, but I was sure wrong. I had pop in the morning and a large pop in the afternoon. I ate leftover teriyaki chicken from Sakkio for lunch and a quarter pounder meal from McDonald's for dinner. I also had a small amount of rum with coke before dinner. I did remember to take my vitamin. I woke up to my alarm at 5:45 and used my meditation engine preset from 12-21-07. I listened to the subliminal lucid mp3 for about 4 hours straight in the afternoon, then again right before going to sleep.

The Dreams: Sadly, none of these were lucid. I was surprised, since I got so close to the WILD earlier, but everything in the dreams was really pretty normal. There wasn't too much crazy stuff going on.

The first dream happened before I woke up for the WILD. Again, I had very nearly forgotten it, but remembered when I walked into the bathroom to take my Galantamind. I was watching an episode of Mythbusters and Adam had a CNC machine and was using it to make a table leg. I wasn’t watching on TV, but was actually there. They had almost finished it, but then Jamie came over and had this slanted, round piece of wood connected to a plate that went in the CNC machine. There was a nail sticking out of it. It was some kind of jig to get the table leg to be curved. The block of wood was there to keep the bit from the machine from cutting the metal part of the machine.

Then I woke up and went to the bathroom, I took 2 Galantaminds and sat up on the computer for 30 minutes. I read some of Hiros' journal and some of Twoshadows'. I then went BTB and played my meditation engine on the first preset I made, the 12-21-07 one. After about 30 minutes, I still hadn't felt anything. I was ready to turn over and hope for a DILD, but after 2 weeks of failures doing just that, I figured I'd try a little longer. After about 15 more minutes I guess, I was doing the stirring technique from Astral Dynamics on my left toe knuckle. The first thing that happened was both my ears popped simultaneously. I suddenly saw an image of a giant PSP up against my bedroom wall, next to the closet. There was a really hot Asian woman on a news show. It was different from a dream about a news show though. I was actually seeing this with my eyes. I was unsure if my eyes were open or closed, I tried to think about my eyes, but couldn't decide if they were. I think they were closed. I figured, okay, this is it, and I drew my awareness closer to the screen. I wanted to get into that scene and a lucid dream with the news anchor. I couldn't quite make it, but I started to feel a rush of energy through my whole body. It was like the feeling of being on a roller coaster I guess, or much higher frequency vibrations than I usually get, but it was over my entire body. The feeling came and went, though it mostly stayed with me. It was amazing. I was so hyped that I finally reached this point. I was able to make the feeling intensify by focusing more on my foot.

Near the end, I tried to do the giant wheel exit that I read about in Astral Dynamics, where you imagine your dream body rolling up over a giant wheel in your room and then back through your physical body and around again. I started to lose focus though and went back to my foot stirring. Later, I tried to sit up and I felt my body also laying down. I was unsure if I was up or down. I was also unsure if I was dreaming yet. I tried to do the tongue through teeth RC, but ended up moving my tongue. Then I woke up for real and couldn't get back into it.

Then I turned over and tried to WILD from my side. As usual, I fell asleep pretty quick. I had a couple dreams that I remembered immediately upon waking. I didn't even have to try hard really. I tried to take a mental note to remember, but I forgot them now because I didn't write them down. I then had about three more dreams though, which I do remember.
In the first one, I was at a mall with my mom and wife. We were trying to get to an entrance, but I made a wrong turn and was in this parking area that was a dead end. I was waiting for all these pedestrians to GTFO of the way, but they were walking really slow. Finally they moved, and I got past only to find the dead end. I turned around and took them back out the way we came and got to the mall entrance. I don’t remember anything else, though I know there was more, especially before the stuff I remember.

In the next dream, we were in this house. It was a really old house, and I only remember, vaguely, one room. It was a lot like the room upstairs in our church, where they keep the old piano. I was there with my mom, then suddenly we were in our own house and my wife came home with these eggs. They were duck eggs like they eat in the Philippines with the duck embryo inside. I was like, “Yuck!” There was a thin part of the shell on each one where you could see inside of the egg. I saw little yellow ducks in most of them, but there were two that were different. I guess my wife brought them because she knew I wouldn’t like the duck eggs. One had some fluff inside with a piece of 3 Musketeers bar. Another had some scrambled eggs, some mashed potatoes and some bacon inside. I opened this one and put the food on a plate.

In the last one, I was with my mom on the street. She had a bicycle, but was walking it. We had just come out of a restaurant, I think, and we walked past these trees planted in the sidewalk that had been dressed up. The trees had two trunks that grew together up high, so it looked like a pair of legs walking. Someone had put on these really really long red rubber leggings with rubber feet onto the trunks, so they really looked like a pair of legs walking. Then we saw these two other trees. They had a single trunk, but it split near the bottom and branched out. It looked a lot like an upside down person riding a bike. Someone had put a giant bike up in the branches, upside-down, and dressed up parts of the trees in biker’s outfits. So now it really looked like a (headless) biker growing upside down out of the sidewalk.

I think it was at this point that I got on her bike. The handlebars were really close and my knees bumped them so I couldn’t pedal. I tried to rotate the bars back, but they were still in the way, so I kinda just pushed off the ground with my feet. We came to this outdoor party that was going on. My mom was taking me there for my birthday. It was called the January 32nd party. There were people sitting at tables all over the sidewalk and around the corner of this building. There was this huge open area that looked like the mall in Washington DC, but with buildings on each side. It was really more like the “mall” in Colonial Williamsburg. Anyway, we were on this elevated part of the sidewalk and there was a wall there. We stood at the wall, and there were people around the corner, next to the buildings singing Christmas music for the party. I was unsure if this was the January 32nd party or if this was another show that was just ending. They were singing “The First Noel.” I said to my mom, “I really don’t like this song, I like ______ much better.” I forget which one I liked better. I think it was “We Three Kings.” They sang a verse at the end that doesn’t really exist, and I actually did like it.

There was nowhere to sit, so we went around the corner, and I guess the Christmas show ended because now there was an announcer talking about “last year’s competition.” I guess there had been an Iron Chef contest that took place there, and that’s what they were about to do now. There was a cute (not really sexy, but cute) girl there with an obviously fake nose who was talking about the food they made last year. There was also a big statue of her on the mall. She had long curly hair. There were like strips of wide curls and strips of tight curls. It was really very pretty. They were showing scenes of last year's show on big monitors too. The food was disgusting. There was a beef and cream cheese shake that looked like chunks of beef floating in blood. Beef and baked potato was the only good thing, the girl said. There was a hot dog that opened and closed its end on its own and some black stuff was inside. It looked like poop. :yuck: I saw the girl on the monitor take a bite of it. She looked disgusted too. (I guess this dream reflects what I usually think of the stuff they make on Iron Chef in real life).

Then there was a contest between the cute girl and some faggy-looking guy. He looked like a male version of her. I wasn’t sure what the contest was, but I think the guy won based on some objective criteria like vibrations per second. I figured out after that it was an ass-shaking contest. He was standing on a table with a really tight top that bared his mid-section. Everyone was applauding for him.

Then I woke up for the last time and laid in bed trying to be sure I remembered all this.

Haha, I laughed out loud when I read about the headless upside down biker trees How does our minds come up with this crap? lol

Congrats on the WILD progress. I had a very intense HI experience the other night too, so it looks like we're both making progress.

I tried that meditation engine on my PSP after reading about it on your journal. It didn't seem to help at all, I used the meditation preset that comes with it and it just annoyed me after a while and I turned it off. But I want to give it another try on one of the other settings.

Hey man. Yeah, I wasn't too crazy about any of the presets that came with it either. I made my own though, and I think it helps me. I do notice it's easier to get the vibrations to start when I'm listening. This is the preset I used. If you want to try it, save the following text to a txt file and put it in the pme/preset folder.

WILD 122107
V300.0 6.5
V0 0
V0 0
V0 0
V0 0
V0 0
V0 0
V0 0
T0 20 50 300.0 6.0
T0 50 110 300.0 5.5
T0 110 170 300.0 4.5
T0 170 230 300.0 4.0
T0 290 320 300.0 5.8
T0 333 363 300.0 6.0
T0 430 460 300.0 5.2
T0 460 490 300.0 6.0
T0 520 550 300.0 5.8
T0 550 580 300.0 5.0
T0 610 640 300.0 5.2
T0 640 670 300.0 5.0
T0 700 730 300.0 5.8
T0 730 760 300.0 6.0
T0 790 820 300.0 6.2
T0 820 850 300.0 6.0
T0 880 910 300.0 6.8
T0 910 940 300.0 6.0
T0 970 100 333.0 5.98

I'm thinking it might be better to stay up closer to the 6 hz range rather than letting it fall to 4 because that's getting too close to the border of deep sleep.

2-17-08

I tried 2 Galantaminds last night again. I knew that the effectiveness might be reduced, but the weekends are really my only days to have enough time to WBTB and WILD right. I tried to do everything exactly the same as the night before. I did feel the vibrations/tingling through my entire body, but no HI this time. I drifted off a couple times during my WILD. I guess I should have stayed up a little longer. I also found it hard to keep alert and concentrated on my energy raising visualizations. I hope it was just the Galantamind losing its effectiveness. Yes, I'm going to believe that. I'm not going to think that Saturday was a fluke. I am better at WILD than I was before.

The Dreams: I didn't hardly remember anything from after the WILD, but remembered one from before, which is the opposite of what I usually get. Of all the dreams I could have remembered though, the one I remembered was a terrible nightmare. It was completely normal, except for being with my Grandpa, who died several years ago. There were no supernatural elements or monsters at all, but it was the most disturbing dream I've had since I started with this dream journal.

I spontaneously woke up at 4:45 on my own. I went back to sleep knowing my alarm would go off at 5:45. I had this dream, then woke up at 5:42.

In the dream, I was out in my car. I went to Westgate Mall and to Midway Mall. They weren't anything at all like they are in real life. I actually just drove past them on the highway. I also went to The Flats, an area of Cleveland where there used to be bars and clubs. Now they're changing it to housing for derelicts or something. Whatever. I went to a restaurant there called "Flat of the Earth." I don't think my mom and grandpa were with me at this point, but some time along the way, they were with me. We were on our way home.

Apparently we were coming home early. This guy who used to be friends with my best friend Vince, whose name is Shay, was coming over. In the dream, he was a coworker or something of my wife's. We were on a sidestreet approaching our house, and saw his car parked there. We pulled up to the house, and I knew something was wrong, but I hoped it wasn't what I thought. When we got there though, I looked out the back window of the car and saw through the attic window, my wife was putting her robe on and Shay was getting out of the bed up there. I saw him lift up the covers. My wife looked out the window and I could see her make a super angry face and start yelling.

I was so pissed. We pulled into the driveway and I didn't have my house key. My mom and grandpa were looking for theirs and had just found it when my wife opened the door. She smiled and acted like everything was okay. I knew better though. She said something to me like, "Hey, look who's here," referring to Shay. I barged into the house and looked up the steps to the kitchen. Shay was standing there. I took a step up without saying anything and tried to grab him. He slipped out of my reach though and laughed. I was yelling now, I said "I'm gonna kill you, you mother f***er!"

Then he was suddenly somehow outside. I chased him across the driveway and through the gate in fence and into the neighbor's back yard. I was really going to kill him if I caught him. He was just walking fast, and even though I was running, he was gaining ground on me. There were two neighbor kids with him and they were laughing at me.

I went back to the house and there were two cats who weren't ours standing in the driveway. My cat, Sapsy, who died several years ago was there too. I took her in so that she wouldn't get sick from the other two cats. I saw my wife standing inside. We were then suddenly upstairs in a bathroom. (There isn't really an upstairs bathroom). It was just like the bathroom in the old trailer I used to live in. I had a sister in the dream, and she came in to the bathroom to wash her face or something, and I didn't want to say anything in front of her. Then I figured, "Screw it, she knows anyway," and I said to my wife, "Not once. I never once cheated on you." She was still trying to act like nothing happened. I asked, "So why do you have all that makeup on?" She had so much make up on it looked like a mask. You could see where the makeup stopped and her real skin color began. She looked almost like those Japanese opera women, except the makeup was like a light brown instead of white. She said something like, "You know, I put makeup on to go out or this and that." I could tell she didn't know what to say.

Then we went to the back bedroom of the trailer. There was a stick that I used to use at my Tae Kwon Do Class with black tape on it and blue tape around the handle laying on the bed. I picked it up and said, "Next time I see that mother f***er, I'm gonna kill him. Or maybe I'll just break his arms." My wife then opened a bottle and dropped out four pills. She said, "I was going to take some pills," meaning, she was going to kill herself. I said, "Well that won't solve anything," meaning, it wouldn't undo what she did. She took the pills to the bathroom and threw them in the toilet.

Then I woke up and was so relieved that it was just a dream. I hated that dream.

I remember another fragment from a later dream. There was a race with these Japanese guys I think. They were in different types of rolling things. I remember one guy was on a ladder that had wheels on the bottom. Near the end of the race, he let the ladder fall forward and it had wheels on the top too, so it rolled like that.

In another one, I was at this movie theater, or a drive in. It was dark outside, and there were pornstars there. Near the end, I didn't specifically recognize that I was dreaming, so I wasn't lucid, but was able to pick a different pornstar that I liked better, so I exerted a little control.

2-18-08

I didn't have very good recall last night. I woke up at about 3:30 and did remember one dream. I think Mileena was in it, but I didn't bother to write it down or commit to remember it because I wanted to get some good sleep so I could try to WILD at 4:45.

I woke up to my alarm and took one Choline pill by itself. I stayed up for 15 minutes then WBTB. I was able to keep more focused than the night before, though I think I did drift off a little. Suddenly, I felt vibrations in the back of my neck just like I always used to. I started focusing on my feet like before and managed to get the vibrations to spread over my whole body.

The Dream:

I don't know how long I stayed like this, but the next thing I knew, I was standing at the foot of my bed! I must have lost consciousness though, because I wasn't sure I was dreaming. I had the thought in my head though, because I wondered about it. I looked at the space between the foot of the bed and the wall in front of it, and it looked bigger than it really is. I knew that in my dreams my house is often different from the real one. So I looked at this a while. It kept changing, but for some reason I couldn't decide if it really was different. So, I did a reality check. I tried to put my finger through my palm, but, it didn't go through. I did it about 6 times, but it didn't work.

So, I just went along with the dream, not lucid at all. I was supposed to go outside and help my mom with a split rail fence along our driveway. It was actually in the neighbor's yard, and there was a flower bed in front of it. My mom had cleared out the flowers, which were spiky, and I had no shoes on.

We were putting in a diagonal brace between the split rails. I went away to get some tools or something and when I came back, the flowers had all been put back. I tried to step on the edge so I wouldn't get any thorns in my feet. I gradually woke up from this and realized, "Oh great. Yep, I was dreaming."

Ohh too bad
I hate when that happens!

I use the block my nose and breath RC because although I've only done it a few times in a dreams, its never failed on me... yet.

I tried WILDing with that preset you made. After about 20 minutes the sound just stopped for some reason. I'll have to look into why it did that... It screwed me up, but i kept trying for 10 minutes and gave up because I wasn't getting anywhere, it was already 6:30 and I was wasting time for dreaming. I will say that the new preset wasn't as annoying as the default ones though, I found it calming.

I had it in my head all day yesterday that I would at least have a DILD because its been a week since my last one and so far I've always had one each week since I started trying. So I went to sleep and had a normal dream, woke up tried to FILD back to sleep and failed, but finally had that DILD i was expecting. I need to find a way to honestly expect one every night, then I should have them more often.

Dude, that happened to me before! It means your ears just shut off. I think it's part of sleep paralysis. It happened to me today too. You're lucky man. I've been waiting like 3 weeks to have a good LD. I guess I did have some that were technically lucid in the interim, but they weren't good at all. If I could only finally nail WILD, I could get them like you do.

2-19-08

Again last night, I missed becoming lucid for a stupid stupid reason. I didn't remember anything from before the WBTB, and when I did wake up, I had slept through my alarm and it was 5:50. I tried to WILD, because I figured I had done it before in a short time, but after about 25 minutes, I gave up because I wanted to get some more sleep. So from 6:15 to 6:45, I had this dream.

The Dream:

I was in the American Gladiators arena, but it alternately changed into my garage, and my basement. I had this ladder, and was using it to climb up to the ceiling so I could get a good close look at it so that when I did the awareness bounce from Astral Dynamics, I would know what I was looking at. I had a thing that I put on the ladder, that was shaped like a chariot and it hooked onto the ladder step. It was to hold the cord from my light so I could see the ceiling better. At one point, I was in my garage, and the ladder had changed to the wooden one I used to have and the chariot wouldn't fit over the wider steps. Them my mom gave me the retractable trouble light, and I just held the cord in my hand.

There was also this really tall straight ladder, and people were lined up on it. I'm not sure what they were in line for, but I think it was either a slide, or they were jumping off killing themselves because they were in a dream and knew they wouldn't die. How did I miss that?

Then I was in my house, and I was talking to my wife. We were sitting at the kitchen table, and get this: I told her, "Yeah, I don't really believe that you leave your body in astral projection. I think you just dream that your body is there sleeping. But I did put a playing card face up in the basement on top of the heating duct just in case." (I really did do that IRL yesterday. I don't think I'll be able to see it, or even remember to look for it. I'll be happy if in my next LD I can stay in it long enough to get it on with Jessica Alba or Marisa Miller).

Tonight I had a banana. So I'm confident something will happen. I'm also going to take one choline pill when I WBTB. I hope I don't miss my alarm.

Haha, nice. Lining up to kill themselves

I'm sure it wasn't my ears cutting out, it was the program. I could hear my sister in the kitchen. Thats partly why I was using the program, so I wouldn't be distracted by the outside noise. I've tried going to sleep earlier so I can WILD before she gets up but I just can't seem to make myself do it. I kept going anyway, and when I gave up I checked the PSP and it was still on and everything, but had stopped playing the sound, I pressed X and it started again. Something funky with the program, glitched itself I guess.

I almost had success with FILD last night I think, even thought for a moment I was dreaming. Seems easier to me than a full WILD. I WILDed for 50 minutes, got some progress, couldn't feel my body.

Ohh, and I ate 2 bananas last night like that other thread somewhere suggested. I had very weird dreams, but my recall was actually less that normal so it didn't seem to work. I had a lucid anyway by sort of refusing to get up until I had one But it was so bad... I was dumber than nails in it.