Venusflesh's Dream journal

[venusflesh]

So, I have been slacking off recording my dreams lately. The last dream I wrote down was on September 21st. I hope that by having this online journal, I will be more motivated to write down my dreams! The teal color text is what I will write my personal notes in, if I need to, while describing the dream. Lucid parts/dreams will be red. The first post is a weird experience that I had on Monday night. Oct. 27, 2008 Last night something weird happened, and it's hard to explain because it's kind of vague and cloudy in my mind, but I'm going to try. First, I remember getting up to go to the bathroom, and looking at the clock in the bathroom and it being 12:59 am. The thing is, I remember looking at a clock that isn't really there... when I remember it in my mind, the clock is in a different place than where it really is in real life. In our bathroom it's on the window sill, but in this memory of last night, the clock is on the shelf by the sink. I don't get it... it's really weird to me. I don't know if my mind just is remembering wrong, or if this was all a dream, or what. The next thing I remember is going back to my room, and I remember standing by the light, because I had turned it on. If I remember right, I had turned it on because I'd had a kind of freaky/scary dream before waking up, although I can't remember what it was at this point. So anyway, the next thing I remember is laying in bed, and the thing is, I felt SO weird... it's really hard to explain. At points I felt like I was floating out of my body or mind, in a way, but it wasn't physical... it was in my mind. I felt like if I drifted back to sleep, I wouldn't wake up, or something weird would happen. I was thinking about lucid dreaming, and I was wondering if I was having a lucid dream (I've always wanted to experience one, but never have). I was thinking what it would be like if I got up, to see if I was having a lucid dream, but I was scared to, for some reason... I was scared something weird would happen, or I wouldn't be able to wake out of the lucid dream. I honestly don't know what this was that I experienced. I don't know if this whole thing was a dream. I remember so vividly laying there and feeling that WEIRD feeling, as my eyes were closed... like I was weaving in and out of dream-world, in and out of reality, like my mind was floating... to be honest it really freaked me out! I wish I would have gotten up and tried to tell whether I was having a lucid dream or not, but I didn't. ------------------- [/COLOR]

[venusflesh]

Oct. 30, 2008 Unfortunately I cannot remember any of my dreams last night at the moment. It's possible it will come back to me during the course of the day-- that tends to happen sometimes. I do remember waking up a few times during the night, and I did the reality checks-- I plugged my nose to see if I could breathe through it, and I couldn't. For some reason, and I don't know why, every time I did it I was scared-- I was scared that I actually WOULD be lucid dreaming. I've always wanted to have one, so why does it scare me? I don't get this. I think I'm afraid of not being able to wake up from one... I don't know why I'm afraid of it. I never was before the episode I had on Monday night. Then again, I hadn't really thought about lucid dreaming or the prospect of it, in quite some time. I wish I wasn't afraid... not sure how to get over that. EDIT: OK, I have remembered some of my dream from last night. The first part I remember is being with my sister and Peter, who is this guy I like at work. I don't remember any details really, except for that we are in what looks to be a public bathroom. The walls are pale blueish/gray and the ground is cold, hard cement. I don't know what we are doing there. There was another part of the dream, but I cannot recall it.

[venusflesh]

Nov. 3, 2008 I took a nap yesterday around 3 pm, knowing that I didn't need to wake up any certain time, that I could just enjoy my sleep and try to have a lucid dream. As I drifted off to sleep, I told myself that I would know I was dreaming. While asleep, I experienced some weird things in my dream, and also had a false awakening. I remember dreaming that I woke up, got out of bed, and was standing over by my closet. I looked down at my hands, and they were weird looking-- I couldn't see any of the lines on my hands, and they looked kind of webbed, in a way. They were also glowing white. I remember thinking that it had to be a dream. I then went outside of my bedroom, and I was trying to summon David Duchovny, because I've been telling myself the first thing I'm going to do if I ever have a lucid dream is summon him, LOL. Anyway, so I was trying to make David Duchovny appear, but he never did, and I was frustrated. There was some other guy there, though, but I don't know who it was. THEN, in my dream, I woke up, and was telling someone (I think it was my mom,) that I'd had a lucid dream. Also, I remember dreaming that I was experiencing sleep paralysis-- and I thought it was a dream, but maybe it was real? Then, I remember dreaming that I could tell when I entered the lucid state, too-- all of a sudden, I would hear this noise in my head, like a "whoooosh," and then everything else would fade away, and I'd be in the lucid state. I also know that after having that dream, I had several other dreams, because I slept for around 7 hours. I do not remember the other dreams I had though as of now.

[Reality_is_a_Dream]

You got some crazy ass lucid there. You should do a RC every time you wake up, they make false awakenings (FAs) a perfect opertunity to get lucid. But I'm sure you already knew that.

[venusflesh]

Yeah, I'm going to start trying to remember to do reality checks every time I wake up from now on, and hopefully that will lead me to have more lucid dreams.

[Reality_is_a_Dream]

I tried it for a few weeks, but I never have FAs, so I just quit. I still don't ever recall myself having a FA, but I guess I'll start doing RCs when I wake up again. Good luck with your next LD!

[venusflesh]

I tried it for a few weeks, but I never have FAs, so I just quit. I still don't ever recall myself having a FA, but I guess I'll start doing RCs when I wake up again. Good luck with your next LD! Thank you, and good luck to you, too!

[venusflesh]

Nov. 3, 2008 So in addition to the dreams from my nap yesterday, I also had dreams last night while sleeping. I know there was much more to the dreams than what I remember, but I just can't seem to recall the detail right now. I remember in one dream there was some sort of disaster that was going to happen-- like an earthquake, but I really don't know if that was it. There was this huge mansion and I was there, and so were people I knew, like my family, and others. Somehow I became the hero of the hour because I prevented said disaster from happening, or at least I prevented people from dying and getting hurt. I don't remember any details or anything particular that happened though. Then, in another part of the dream, I remember walking down this big stair-case like ramp in the mansion, and saying out loud what a wonderful dream this was/had been (does this mean I was lucid?? I don't feel like I was).

[KingYoshi]

In your first post, you were having a WILD I think. Whenever I fall into a WILD I hear demonic noises in the background and see figures of people in conversation. My body is impossible to move and I get scared to death. I have yet to power through a wild. I always get too afraid and wake up. All of my Lucid dreams have been without WILDs, so dont be afraid of Lucid dreaming that'll only hold you back, just avoid WILDs. Don't worry they freak me out bad too.

[venusflesh]

In your first post, you were having a WILD I think. Whenever I fall into a WILD I hear demonic noises in the background and see figures of people in conversation. My body is impossible to move and I get scared to death. I have yet to power through a wild. I always get too afraid and wake up. All of my Lucid dreams have been without WILDs, so dont be afraid of Lucid dreaming that'll only hold you back, just avoid WILDs. Don't worry they freak me out bad too. You think, even though I wasn't trying to have one? Weird!

[venusflesh]

Well, last night when I went to bed, I had a lot of trouble sleeping. All I could think about was lucid dreaming, and for some reason, I was scared of having one. I've been having this trouble lately, and I really don't know WHY. It's extremely frustrating. I was pretty much waking up every hour, and sometimes I'd do an RC, and sometimes not. Every time I did one though, I'd be afraid I'd be dreaming. lol, so stupid! Well, finally I got to sleep (this was sometime after 2 am), and this is what I remember. Nov. 4, 2008 I am outside on what looks to be a really nice college campus. It's a beautiful, sunny day. I don't know what prompts me to do so, but I decide to do an RC, to see if I'm dreaming. I plug my nose and try to breathe, and to my astonishment, I can! I can't breathe SUPER well, but I *can* breathe somewhat, as opposed to when I do it in waking life and can't breathe at all. Then, I remember what someone in this forum said-- that you have to "stabilize," and so I started rubbing my hands together (I'm not sure why I did this), and just trying to stabilize myself in the dream scene. I am walking down the sidewalk, and I remember asking, "Can I please see John Lennon?" but then I change my mind and ask for David Duchovny (again LOL). But no one ever shows up. Then, it skips to another scene. I'm in this house, with all these random people, who I don't know. I remember seeing a really nice looking woman there, with long blondish-brown hair. She is smiling at me. Then, I'm in this den-like room, and there is a bar with stools. I remember a task from real life that the leader of this lucid dreaming Yahoo group that I'm in asked me to do yesterday. He wanted me to ask something about angels... I can't remember exactly what it was he wanted me to ask, but he wanted me to ask it of an inanimate object. This next part is kind of vague and cloudy-- I think I ask it of this red object, but I don't know what the object is. Then, I'm talking to this big black lady, who is wearing a red t-shirt, and I ask her, "How are angels created?" or something to that affect. Her answer is REALLY weird-- it's just like, a bunch of words that don't make sense put together. I don't understand it, and I ask someone behind me for a piece of paper and pen to write it down so I'll remember it when I wake up, haha. (It didn't work though-- I can't remember what she said!) Then, I'm back in the other part of the house where I was before, and I want to change the dream scene, so I start spinning, which I've read about-- but then I stop and say to myself that no, I'm not done with this scene yet. Then the next thing I remember is seeing this boy up in a tree, and I ask him, "Do I want a relationship?" (A personal issue I've been dealing with for a while). I don't remember his whole answer, but I know the gist of it is "No, you don't, not right now. " He says more things but I don't remember what they are. Then, it skips to a different scene again, and this time I am in this little store with a bunch of random DCs. I have the idea that I should continue to ask questions of inanimate objects and see what they say. I don't remember everything I ask, but I do remember asking some object if my ex-boyfriend ever cheated on me. The object says yes, and I'm really surprised. Then, I decide to ask something else, and I pick up this kind of old-looking object, that is kind of like an old-fashioned phone, but not... it's hard to explain. I put the receiver to my ear and ask the same question about my ex-boyfriend. The voice on the other end is saying yes he did, but then it explains something about how it doesn't matter if they answer yes or no, because the only person who will truly ever know is my ex-boyfriend, so their answer doesn't matter- or something like that. Then, the voice starts talking about creepy and disturbing things, like about how I could have gotten a disease from him, and the voice uses the word "black cancer" and is talking about me getting that, from my ex-boyfriend, in certain private areas, if you get my drift. (Which, I never got any disease from my ex in real life, so I don't know what that whole thing was about!) I do NOT like what this voice is turning into, so I think to myself, "That's enough of that!" and put down the receiver, because the voice was starting to freak me out. Then, I remember I'm telling the DCs that I'm having a lucid dream, because I think they are thinking I'm a bit strange for talking to inanimate objects, LOL. The last thing I remember is telling myself to wake up, because all the DCs are leaving to go somewhere, and it's like, I felt the dream was time to be over or something like that.

[venusflesh]

Nov. 5, 2008 This dream is pretty jumbled and incoherent, but I'll try to explain it best I can. First, I remember being in this house, and I think my family is moving there. I think I'm trying to decide which bedroom I want to be mine. I don't remember any dream actions, I just remember a brief glimpse of this scene. The next thing I remember is that there is this huge house, and there is a part of it that is REALLY haunted and evil, like the Amityville Horror house or something like that. I remember sitting in a room in that part of the house, and there is an article of clothing hanging above me on some rack. All of a sudden the article of clothing starts to move back and forth by itself, and I know it's the evil spirits messing with me. I'm like, "OH HELL NO!" and I get out of there, because I'm scared as HELL. I think that somebody I know is thinking of moving in there, and if I recall correctly, I am telling them/warning them of the evil that is there, so that they don't move in. Then, there's a new dream scene. I have traveled to Iowa for some reason, but I don't remember why. I remember 2 parts to this dream, and I don't know which came first. In one part, I am driving around, and I'm trying to find a Bank of America because I need to get cash out. I am not sure where I can find one, and I see a big shopping plaza, and pull in to it and park. I get out but don't see a Bank of America, so I go to this credit union ATM and get money out, even though I don't want to pay extra fee. The other part I remember is I'm inside, in this hallway. There are these really yummy looking cupcakes (one of my dream signs, I think, is really delicious desserts or food). I take one and I don't know if I eat it or save it. Then I'm talking to this woman and she says something to me, I don't know what, and I say to her, "I have to go back to California now." She says something that insinuates that I'm lucky to live in CA, as opposed to Iowa. That's about all I remember...

[venusflesh]

Nov. 6, 2008 Alora's baby I am at the hospital with my mom, step-sister, and perhaps some other family, I'm not sure. My step-sister Alora is having another baby (in real life she just had a baby 3 months ago). I don't remember much about this dream-- I think there is some sort of complication with the pregnancy, but I think she ended up okay. I remember there being a baby, or babies, but it is not like a normal baby-- it's really small, and I can't make out exactly what it looks like, but in my mind I kind see/feel like it's about the size of a melon, but oval shaped, and brown, and it's kind of fruit-like... like the skin is like a kiwi fruit or something. LOL it's really hard to explain. I also remember something about my old cat Archie, who in real life passed away a couple of years ago, but I don't know what it was. Singing with George Harrison The first dream I remember, I am at the house I grew up in (this is a dream sign for me-- I dream SO OFTEN that I'm at this particular house I lived in, in real life, from when I was 9-14). I am there with my family, and some other people, and we are all out on the back patio. I ask my family where our dog was (we used to have a dog in real life named Casey, who we gave to another family when I was 14). They tell me that they had to put him to sleep, which is sad. Then, all of a sudden George Harrison is there (he looks like he did in the early Beatles days). He is standing next to me, and he wants to sing a song with me. I'm really happy and excited that I get to sing with him. I tell him I want to sing HIS song, "Something." Someone else there in the backyard with us points out that George was not the only one to write the song. Anyway, we have no music, but George is so talented that he is able to do the guitar sounds with his voice, and he's pretending to play the guitar, plucking invisible strings in the air. It's really awesome and neat! When the time comes to start the song, I am singing it, and then the next thing I remember is that I'm watching a video of David Bowie singing it. He's performing at a concert, and he's on the stage, and is dressed all in white. His hair is longer, circa his 1999 look. That's the last thing I remember. Reading Dream Views I was on the internet, reading this DV forum. I was reading the thread where people were talking about what particular hypnagogic images they experience. People were posting pictures of the kinds of images and things they see when they are in that state. There were dark pictures of tornado-like funnel clouds, and someone posted some kind of picture of the Chucky doll, from the horror movie. It was kind of freaky. random dream fragment I remember watching Lucy Liu and Calista Flockhart, on Ally McBeal, and they are going to kiss again, like they did in that one Ally McBeal episode back in 1999 or whenever it was. I'm kind of excited and think it's really hot. I don't remember anything else, really.

[venusflesh]

Nov. 9, 2008 I had a lot of dreams on Friday night/Sat. morning, and Sat. night/Sunday morning, but I can't remember any of them now. DOH. I attempted to WILD on Saturday morning, with no success. I tried Billy Bob's method. I woke up around 8 am, after passing out around, oh, 2 am. I was up for a very short time though-- probably only 10 minutes. I was just sooo tired. I put an uncomfortable object under me, and tried to keep it in my conscious as I drifted off to sleep, but it didn't work. Next thing I know, I'm waking up out of a regular dream some time later. Grrrrrrrr! Oh well, that was just my first attempt-- I don't think many people succeed their first time, do they?

[venusflesh]

Nov. 10, 2008 Psycho dad I don't remember the beginning of this dream-- I know there was more to it that the bits and pieces I remember, but they have escaped me. Basically, the main thing in this dream is that my dad went crazy-- absolutely, psychopath, scarily insane. I don't know what caused it, but I just remember him unraveling and it's really scary. In one scene, I am with my sister Alaina, and some other people, and we're walking or running somewhere, I think we may be trying to run from my dad-- I'm not sure. This is the horrible/horrific part-- I think my dad douses us in gasoline, and then he throws a match at us. I remember seeing the ground where the gasoline is light up in blue flames, and race along the ground where we are. Somehow I escape, but my sister isn't lucky. She dies from being burned to death. I am so... devastated and I just cannot believe she's actually dead. Next thing I remember is that I am telling my mom and step-dad what has happened-- I can't believe that I have to tell my mom that her daughter is dead, at the hands of her ex-husband. It's just absolutely tragic and horrifying. That's all I remember. Dream fragment There was another dream in which I'm at our old house on Laredo St. (one of my dream signs), and my mom gives me money to order Round Table pizza, and is being super sweet. I also remember driving around Napa (where we used to live, where said house is at). There is more but I can't remember at the moment... I have a feeling it will come back to me though. EDIT: It never did, lol.

[venusflesh]

Nov. 11, 2008 Baby RJ tragedy In this dream, something horrible has happened to my nephew, RJ. He is only 3 months old in real life. I don't know what or how, but I just remember hearing that he has gone brain dead from some accident. I am absolutely DEVASTATED. The thing in this dream that I remember though, is really weird-- I am looking down on this really long bridge, that seems to be in mid-air... it's so high above the ground that you can barely see the earth below. It's really freaky and scary. There are people, in a line, walking along this bridge, and it has to do with my step-sister and nephew, but I'm not sure how. Pregnant from Rob This dream was so... just... EW. In the first part of the dream, I am having sex with my ex-boyfriend (who, in real life, I am not attracted to WHATSOEVER anymore). This part of the dream isn't long, I just remember the end of the sex part-- he ejaculates inside of me, and I'm HORRIFIED. I cry, "I'M NOT ON BIRTH CONTROL!!! You're not wearing a condom!!!" I cannot BELIEVE that he actually came inside of me and that I could be pregnant... I'm FREAKING OUT. The next thing I remember, is that I'm with another man... and I think he's my boyfriend? I'm not sure. I also think I have a daughter with him, but she's not a baby-- she's like, 2 years old or so. It's really weird. o_O I don't remember much of this, I know there was more to it than what I'm recalling-- I just remember that the boyfriend of mine, he kind of resembles Michael McDonald from MAD TV, haha. I think that I'm trying to decide if I want to be with him, or another man... that's about all I remember.

[jimrocks22]

Nov. 3, 2008 I remember thinking that it had to be a dream. I then went outside of my bedroom, and I was trying to summon David Duchovny, because I've been telling myself the first thing I'm going to do if I ever have a lucid dream is summon him, LOL. Anyway, so I was trying to make David Duchovny appear, but he never did, and I was frustrated. There was some other guy there, though, but I don't know who it was. THEN, in my dream, I woke up, and was telling someone (I think it was my mom,) that I'd had a lucid dream. I love it that you tried and remembered what you wanted to dream about I've been trying to dream about Jennifer Love Hewitt but it never happens but I'm encouraged by this keep trying for it. I'm sure you'll get there before I do!

[venusflesh]

I love it that you tried and remembered what you wanted to dream about I've been trying to dream about Jennifer Love Hewitt but it never happens but I'm encouraged by this keep trying for it. I'm sure you'll get there before I do! Hmm I'm not so sure, lol! I have only had those 2 lucid dreams in the past couple of weeks... I had 2 in a row, and haven't had any since. Frustrating!

[venusflesh]

Sinking plane This dream was horrible. I am somewhere, not sure of the city or exact place, but it's on the waterfront, and across the water, is the runway for this airport. I am with someone, or maybe more than one person, not sure, and I look out at the water/sky, and there is a plane landing... the plane is SO close to us that it appears absolutely frigging GIGANTIC... it's actually really scary and I'm like, "HOLY SHIT!" because it's SO HUGE and SO CLOSE. The next thing that happens is the plane lands, and it's going towards the water, and something malfunctions, and the plane goes INTO the water, and at first we think it's just going to skim the surface and get to the land okay, but it starts to SINK in the water. Everyone is HORRIFIED and traumatized, because we are watching this ENORMOUS plane with PEOPLE in it sink into the ocean/bay, and I am thinking to myself, "Oh my god those people are going to die" and I cannot believe it's actually happening, it's devastating, and so incredibly SCARY and HORRIBLE. Then, somehow, I am in the ocean with my mom and I THINK my sister, and I think we are on a boat of some sort, and we're trying to fight the massive waves that are being caused from the plane crash in the water. The waves are gigantic, like TIDAL waves, and I look out and see a huge one coming right at us... I'm wondering how we are going to survive this. It's really scary. I remember seeing a glimpse of this girl in a boat. She's pretty petite, and she is hiding in the bottom corner of this long narrow boat. I also remember seeing this white boat, with a bunch of rope-like things streaming from the sails, and I'm thinking it might be a safe thing to hold onto, or get on, to try and save ourselves. That's about all I remember of that dream.

[venusflesh]

Nov. 16, 2008 I had my 3rd lucid dream the same way I had my first-- taking a nap on Sunday afternoon. I went to sleep around 2 pm or so, and I had the lucid dream shortly before I woke up, between 4 and 5 pm. The dream was very cloudy and jumbled. The first part I remember is that I'm at my old house in Napa (not the house I usually dream I'm in, but the 2nd house we lived in, the last house we lived in before we moved away). I had a series of false awakenings. I remember waking up in my old bed, and I'm getting dressed. I have on this brown sweater, and I can't remember what else. Then, I'm laying down, trying to go to sleep again, and I wake up again, and I realize I'm dreaming. I go out into the hall, and I decide I want to fly, so I jump up and I'm flying down the stairs, and I go into the living room. I think this happens a couple of times-- the false awakenings, and realizing I'm lucid dreaming. On what I believe is the 2nd time, I fly downstairs

[venusflesh]

Nov. 28, 2008 Sex with Jason Marsden I had my 4th lucid dream. I became lucid without doing any reality checks. In the dream, I am with this actor, Jason Marsden, who I've had a crush on since I was about 13 years old, or so. (He is actually my friend on Myspace in real life, and I've e-mailed back and forth with him a couple times.) All of a sudden in the dream, I realize I am dreaming. In the dream, I think to myself that I need to turn around and face him, without moving in real life and waking myself up. The feeling is so weird-- it's like I can feel myself in bed, but in the dream I'm moving, yet I'm not moving in real life... it's hard to explain. Anyway, so then I am facing Jason, and the next thing I know, I'm laying down and he's on top of me, and we're going to have sex. He has his penis out, and he's erect, and then he enters me. It feels SO REAL, it's crazy!! Then, I start to worry that I'm going to start thinking about something scary, like Freddy Kreuger, lol, and I start to get scared. I'm trying to concentrate on Jason, and repeat his name in my head, but the worry and fear is too strong. All of a sudden I can't see Jason anymore, because he's positioned above me in such a way that his head is past my line of vision. However, I can FEEL that he is changing form, and I know he's turning into something scary. I am way too freaked out, and I'm like, "Fuck this!" and I think I chose to wake up then, or just... escape the dream somehow, I don't know how though.

[venusflesh]

Dec. 7th, 2008 I had my 5th lucid dream last night. I've been slacking though, because I haven't been recording ANY of my dreams for almost the past month. STUPID ME. Anyway, as with the last lucid dream, I became lucid without doing any reality checks (unless I just don't remember doing one, but I'm pretty sure I'd remember). I am standing in a room somewhere, and all of a sudden I realize I'm dreaming. There is a guy in front of me in a black sweatshirt, of black descent, and he has glasses on and has a shaved head, and is tall. As soon as I realize I'm dreaming, my first instinct is to scamper off and try to do stuff, but I realize I need to stabilize myself first. I rub my hands together, and it seems to work, because then I think I feel more, well, stable in the dream. The next thing I remember is that I'm in this house, and my mom is there. We are upstairs, standing outside of this bedroom. I am thinking to myself that I want to try to get my mom to say something funny, and we're talking about something, and all of a sudden she says something really random and hilarious, except when I woke up, I couldn't remember what it was! Damn. Then, the scene changes again, and I am in some place, but I don't know what/where it is. It's inside some building, somewhere. I am trying to control the dream and put myself in the scene from The Labyrinth, the ballroom scene, in the beautiful dress that Sarah wears, and with Jareth there, etc. (I've been telling myself in real life that if I have another lucid dream, I want to dance with Jareth/David Bowie like Sarah did in The Labyrinth movie). I am trying to think about it, and picture myself in the scene, to try and get it to happen, and all of a sudden, I'm in the dress (except I don't think it's 100% the exact same, but it's pretty close)! I'm really happy that I'm in the dress, but I want to be in the scene, too, and I want David Bowie as Jareth to be there. I remember how I've read that a way to get something to appear in your dream is to look for it, so I'm looking for Jareth, and saying to myself that I'm looking for him. I also remember spinning around and around, dancing by myself in the dress, and I keep looking at my reflection in this window, not quite a mirror, and loving the way the dress looks. I think that I check to see if I have the silvery things in my hair that Sarah has in the movie, and I have those, too. For some reason though, when I am thinking back on the dream, in the image in my mind of my reflection, it looks like I'm in my Rainbow Brite costume from Halloween... but I remember being in that beautiful gown. I don't know, dreams are weird. Anyway. The next thing I remember is that David Bowie is there, except he's not dressed as Jareth. He's in a black sweater, and his hair is short... he looks younger than he is in real life now. He is sitting on a chair in this little office which is near where I had been spinning/dancing. I am in the room/office with him, and to my disappointment, he seems extremely uninterested in me. I am in tears, telling him how much I love him, what a fan I am, etc., but he's just sitting there, not paying attention, and looks bored/annoyed. I'm so bummed! The last part I remember is I decide to start spinning to change the dream scene, so I am spinning, and then I look around and there is no scene anymore-- all there is, is white around me. That's the last thing I remember. [/FONT]

[kinkydreamgirl]

It sounds like you've been going out for astral travel and leaving your body at night. That frozen feeling, that has to do with feeling seperated from your body and trying to reenter. Usually anytime you are flying over things that indicates OBE's. People usually engage in astral travel at least three times a week, many dismiss it as lucid dreaming, but usually it's more intense, much like the experiences you have described. Have you tried praying and doing the protection excercises before you go to sleep? I usually ask my guides angels and Jesus for safe travels...sometimes you can encounter some scary entities, liek people who died tragically...you visit other levels that can be frightening and hence the paralyzing feeling when you try to come back after a long night of flying. Ask Gabriel and Michael to guide you safely in and out of your body and you should encounter much less resistence and trauma during re-entry. I would also recommend to you looking into how to ward off psychic vampires and negative energies, that's another thing you can ask the dream angels for, just to be protected from any threat of dream vampires.

[venusflesh]

I had lucid dreams 2 nights in a row, on Friday and Saturday. So exciting!! Dec. 26, 2008 I had several dreams, but they are not as vivid to me now as they were when I woke up on Saturday morning. I do remember the lucid parts, though. The first dream I remember is one in which I get fired from my current job. I am at work, but my work doesn't look like it actually does in real life. The place is entirely different. This dream is jumbled and a bit all over the place, as lots of my dreams are. Basically I just remember Kim, my boss' boss, being there, and I have messed up a registration or some paper work of some sort... and I know that I'm going to be fired. Then I remember Stephanie calling me into this room, but I'm feeling really defiant and I hate her and want to lash out at her for firing me. There's another part surrounding this dream... something about ghosts and this place I'm at being haunted, and seeing scary visions. I can't remember the details, though. The next parts I remember are lucid. I don't remember how I became lucid-- I think, like in the last lucid dream I had, all of a sudden I just knew I was dreaming. I remember looking down at my hands after this realization to check, and sure enough, my hands were weird-looking. The fingers were kind of gnarled in a way, but not *completely* grotesque... just a little bit. Haha. I remember looking out and seeing this beautiful landscape on the horizon. I saw this vast ocean, and other beautiful landmarks, like trees, green hills, etc. I decided I wanted to fly over that ocean, and the next thing I know I'm in the air, flying. At first I found it hard to control where I was going, but then I stopped trying to control it so much, and somehow I could just veer in the direction I wanted to go... I don't know how I did it exactly, but somehow I found a way to guide myself the right way and do what I wanted. Then, the next thing I remember is I'm with a bunch of people, and I'm masturbating. LOL... I don't know why!! I am trying to get off, and there are people around, but I don't care. I tell myself it doesn't matter if they're seeing me because I'm dreaming, so there's nothing to be embarrassed about. haha. That's about all I remember of the lucid dreams.

[venusflesh]

Dec. 27, 2008 My 7th lucid dream happened the night after I had my 6th lucid dream. WOOHOO!!! The first dream I remember is a dream in which it's my birthday (I just had my birthday 2 weeks ago in real life). I walk into this house or some sort of building, and there are hundreds of people there, and they all shout, "Happy Birthday!!!" It's a surprise party for me, which is awesome. There are sooo many people and they're all dressed nicely and stuff. Calista Flockhart is there, as Ally McBeal, and I hug her tightly and feel such a connection with her. The next thing I remember is walking around the party, and all of a sudden, I don't recognize any of the people at the party anymore. I don't know anyone, and I feel really uneasy and am wondering why everyone I know isn't there anymore, and wondering who all these strangers are. Then, it jumps to another dream, and I'm lucid. I think I just all of a sudden realized I was dreaming without doing a reality check or anything, like in the previous lucid dream. I think I looked down at my hands to check and make sure, and they were weird-looking, just like the night before. The first thing that I remember is, and I don't know why, but for some reason I think about having Jennie Garth (former BH 90210 actress) in my dream. I have NO clue why I picked HER in my dream... I'm a 90210 fan, but she was never my favorite... I don't DISlike her, but I'm not some huge fan. So random! All of a sudden, she's there, walking up to me. She has her long, beautiful blond hair that is cascading down in soft waves, and she's wearing a white pencil skirt and a matching white suit jacket. She looks really pretty. I decide that it would be hot if she went down on me... so lo and behold, that's what she does. She is kneeling down between my legs, and I'm watching her perform oral sex on me, and oh my god, it's SOOO hot... it feels amazing, too... it's so real! I ask her if she likes doing that, and she says "yes." She's very submissive, which is also hot... heehee. Then, it skips to a different part... I'm somewhere, not sure of where it is, and I remember thinking this really random thought of trees made from Coke bottles... and all of a sudden, I turn around, and there are all these trees, of which the stumps are huge Coke bottles. I laugh because it's just so cool how I can create stuff in my dream world! Then, I want to do gymnastics, because I've always loved gymnastics since I was a little girl but never got advanced at it. So all of a sudden there is a balance beam there in front of me. I hop up on it, and I'm doing all sorts of fancy and fun tricks, flips, and jumps on it. I'm doing back handsprings and landing them on the beam, and jumping up really high and landing back on the beam perfectly and stuff. I remember thinking how cool this all is! That's the last part I remember. YAY for more lucid dreams!!!