Thread: Dream Confidentiality

I think it comes down to how private of a person you are.

It did start feeling too personal after a while for me. At first I didn't think it was, but when a couple of people started commenting regularly on my DJ I started dreaming increasingly of my privacy being violated. I know they meant well - they were being nothing but friendly and consciously I didn't feel threatened or anything, but I guess my subconscious got a little freaked out - I remember having one dream where I woke up in my bed to find my room had been converted into a public gallery and strangers were standing around looking at pictures on my walls. There were several other dreams making the same statement in various ways until I finally decided I needed to just stop posting a DJ publicly.

Also, keep in mind dreams communicate through symbols - for instance, a dream of cannibalism doesn't literally mean eating a person's flesh, it could mean stealing their ideas or somehow destroying their self esteem or something similar. Often other people can understand our own dreams better than we can. That's kind of a freaky thought.

A lot of people on this site don't believe in symbolism in dreams, and I think if you don't then you wouldn't have any trouble posting your DJ in here.

If you don't feel comfortable, then don't post that certain dream you think, seems out of line.

If you're talking about dreaming of your friends or somebody you know
and want to talk to them about it, it will depend on how open they are to discuss it or how well you know them.
If you're talking about posting to the forum, I'd go with hathor28's advice.

For me I discuss/talk about my dreams to family and close friends if the dream has any significance regarding them.
and yes I too had a cannabalistic dream, only me and my friend were eating someone together
and when I told him the details of the dream like seasoning and stuff we had a good laugh, so it all depends you know ;D

edit: I'm not into cannablism in anyway, though my friend might consider I might be capable of that because of this dream, when I won't ever do it, cause to me that's all it was.
so there is still some effect, but you decide if you want to tell or not
cheers

I guess it depends on what you dream about ... I don't often have dreams that I'm hesitant to share with other people because there's generally nothing too weird/embarrassing in them. Sometimes I omit things if they are too weird, but not too often. But I typically tell my friends/family about my dreams. I think it actually helps me to remember them better. Of course, if you're uncomfortable about sharing your dreams you don't have to.

I don't mind spilling my guts behind the anonymity of Dreamviews. But strangely, I'm not reluctant to in real life either, though I probably should be. Even when I have dreams like--for example--being in sexual situations with platonic friends or even relatives, intuitively I see nothing wrong with talking about them with these people. Rationally, however, I know I will regret it. I'm beginning to think this lapse of judgement is caused by the fact that they were in the dream with me. They were part of it so it's never been a secret to them, or so I assume. Anyone else ever felt this?

Originally Posted by Skillet7

I'm beginning to think this lapse of judgement is caused by the fact that they were in the dream with me. They were part of it so it's never been a secret to them, or so I assume. Anyone else ever felt this?

You mean you feel it was like dream sharing?...and you assume they know what you dreamt?

I filter nothing but the really personal stuff that some people might take the wrong way. After all, I do have my face posted on this site so I am not guaranteed anonymity.

Just remember that it is public, and that there is no reason to post a dream that you wouldn't want others to read and comment on. Probably 90% of my dreams I would not mind at all and would welcome comments. The other 10% I don't post.

No one knows me IRL here, so I don't feel the need to censor as much. I do leave out some small (particularly graphic) details, and on occasion whole dreams. I'm not really concerned about any of the stuff I post here because of anonymity, but if someone I knew did join I wouldn't post nearly as much as I do now. If the topic of dreams comes up in conversation I might bring up small roles the person has played or minor dreams, but I def wouldn't tell most people all things. It all depends, but face-to-face I'm an extremely private person, and in matters of the subconscious my filter goes on hyperdrive.

Originally Posted by Skillet7

I don't mind spilling my guts behind the anonymity of Dreamviews. But strangely, I'm not reluctant to in real life either, though I probably should be. Even when I have dreams like--for example--being in sexual situations with platonic friends or even relatives, intuitively I see nothing wrong with talking about them with these people. Rationally, however, I know I will regret it. I'm beginning to think this lapse of judgement is caused by the fact that they were in the dream with me. They were part of it so it's never been a secret to them, or so I assume. Anyone else ever felt this?

I read somewhere that your subconscious usually can't tell the difference between imagination and reality. So in fact your subconscious might actually believe that they already know

Originally Posted by Bansheet

I read somewhere that your subconscious usually can't tell the difference between imagination and reality. So in fact your subconscious might actually believe that they already know

Your subconscious shouldn't be capable of knowing the difference, it's not aware after all. It's pretty much everything else, everything that isn't aware. The awareness, which is you, is like what.. 15 or 20% of the brain, more or less?

On topic: I probably would keep it secret, except for when telling them would be a form of venting. For example I once had a dream where I fought my brother to the death, I ended up stabbing him in the back as he was laying on the ground. I believe he was the one forcing me to attack, and so I reacted with instinct in the dream to end it quickly without hesitation. However this caused me to cry in the dream, which in turn caused me to cry in real life which woke me up. I have already told other people about it, but not him, but I would be willing to.

Originally Posted by hathor28

You mean you feel it was like dream sharing?...and you assume they know what you dreamt?

Basically. I mean, obviously I understand that the scenario in my dream didn't actually occur, but since our subconsciousness can't distinguish between reality and dream (as stated above), my normal social inhibitions are abated.

Originally Posted by Skillet7

but since our subconsciousness can't distinguish between reality and dream

No, it can. Maybe that's your problem in dreams.

Originally Posted by hathor28

No, it can. Maybe that's your problem in dreams.

Turns out you're in the minority on this one:

Originally Posted by IronicAtheist

Your subconscious shouldn't be capable of knowing the difference, it's not aware after all.

Originally Posted by Bansheet

I read somewhere that your subconscious usually can't tell the difference between imagination and reality.

"Your subconscious does not know the difference between reality and fantasy" (Hastings).

Source

Originally Posted by hathor28

but since our subconsciousness can't distinguish between reality and dream.

Sorry to break it to you, i actually can distinguish the difference.

Originally Posted by hathor28

Sorry to break it to you, i actually can distinguish the difference.

Right. Consciously, you can.

I think you're missing the point. Otherwise, you're a scientific anomaly.

I think i know why no one much responds to this post. The post started about confidentiality and now it's about what you can distinguish between reality and dreams? Pick one side please and stop changing topic Skillet7 or you won't have anyone to help you if you keep acting like you don't understand dreams or is a skeptic about it.

^ because you keep trolling it?

Originally Posted by Darkmatters

^ because you keep trolling it?

No, i am trying to help and give insight, and all i get back is a "i know better than you" act. So i tell it like it is.

So you really believe that the dreaming mind knows the difference between fact and fantasy? And I'm not talking about in lucid dreams, I mean in normal (unconscious) dreams.

All myths and superstitions arise from the fertile ground of the unconscious - it is the Underworld, Heaven and Hell and Purgatory, it's the Land of the Dead, inhabited by spirits, ghosts, gods and demons. The Ancestors are really just archetypes treading the divine realm of the collective unconscious. And since in reality we are only minds inhabiting the small island of stability called consciousness (which is surrounded and dwarfed by the vast archaic and primal ocean of the unconscious, which forms the shifting ground from which the seemingly stable conscious mind is founded) then in dreams we meet these gods and ancestors frequently. We see ghosts of dead loved ones. And these experiences are very profound - very real in a way that material reality can't compare to. This is precisely why so many people persist in saying that these archetypal visions are literally real - because in a sense they are, and are far bigger than we are. Your mind is a tapestry of thoughts memories and ideas - woven from threads emerging from the depths of the unconscious - woven from the stuff of deep superstitious dread and powerful religious awe but woven into forms that are more rational, and lifted into the light of conscious awareness that casts a small comforting spotlight around us in the vast howling darkness. When awake we know the ghosts and specters aren't real in a material sense, but when asleep they are as real as anything - in a sense more real than anything merely material.

Can you counter this with anything other than baseless assertions?

Originally Posted by Darkmatters

So you really believe that the dreaming mind knows the difference between fact and fantasy? And I'm not talking about in lucid dreams, I mean in normal (unconscious) dreams.

All myths and superstitions arise from the fertile ground of the unconscious - it is the Underworld, Heaven and Hell and Purgatory, it's the Land of the Dead, inhabited by spirits, ghosts, gods and demons. The Ancestors are really just archetypes treading the divine realm of the collective unconscious. And since in reality we are only minds inhabiting the small island of stability called consciousness (which is surrounded and dwarfed by the vast archaic and primal ocean of the unconscious, which forms the shifting ground from which the seemingly stable conscious mind is founded) then in dreams we meet these gods and ancestors frequently. We see ghosts of dead loved ones. And these experiences are very profound - very real in a way that material reality can't compare to. This is precisely why so many people persist in saying that these archetypal visions are literally real - because in a sense they are, and are far bigger than we are. Your mind is a tapestry of thoughts memories and ideas - woven from threads emerging from the depths of the unconscious - woven from the stuff of deep superstitious dread and powerful religious awe but woven into forms that are more rational, and lifted into the light of conscious awareness that casts a small comforting spotlight around us in the vast howling darkness. When awake we know the ghosts and specters aren't real in a material sense, but when asleep they are as real as anything - in a sense more real than anything merely material.

Can you counter this with anything other than baseless assertions?

Read all my dream journals, some are fact and some are fantasies.
Don't be surprised that i know how my mind and dreams work, everyone should...if not then i suggest working on it, meditate, practice and know one self.
By all means please, elaborate what unconscious dreams mean? is it non-lucid? or a WILD?

Let me ask you this then - your contention is that the unconsciuous mind knows the difference between reality and fabrication. So, when I dream of myself first as Arnold Horshak and then as Robert Redford in the same dream, was that reality?

Of course not. It was symbolism. That's the language of the unconscious. In a sense it can be said that it's reality, since dreaming of myself as Horshak represented my awful self esteem in earlier life and as Redford was a sort of fantasy representation - my mind showing me myself as an attractive man.

You know, as I write this I want to change my statement. I now say that the terms fact and fiction (or fantasy or whatever) are irrelevant in dreams and to the unconscious mind. It works with metaphor and symbol. The concept of a fact is something for science and the purely material realm of waking consciousness.

This isn't a complete flip-flop - it's me adjusting my statement because I now understand it was off base. But yeah, fact and fiction are irrelevant terms in the language of the unconscious. From a purely material standpoint it really can't distinguish between reality and fantasy, but then, in the world of inner feelings and ideas from which dreams are woven - the symbols of dreams are absolutely factual. I never was actually Arnold Horshak, but the low self esteem that represented was a fact. Hmmm... must ponder this more.

Good convo!

Originally Posted by hathor28

I think i know why no one much responds to this post. The post started about confidentiality and now it's about what you can distinguish between reality and dreams? Pick one side please and stop changing topic Skillet7 or you won't have anyone to help you if you keep acting like you don't understand dreams or is a skeptic about it.

Actually, the two topics are very related. The thread (which seems perfectly active to me) is about how the inability to subconsciously distinguish between reality and dreams might inhibit the natural reluctance to confide your revealing or taboo dreams in others.

Originally Posted by hathor28

No, i am trying to help and give insight, and all i get back is a "i know better than you" act. So i tell it like it is.

Actually, you'll notice that I make no assertions here beyond quoting my peers. And I appreciate discussion and debate, but all you've done is contradict each of my posts without evidence or logic. It may seem like I'm attacking you because your position seems very unlikely, but I encourage you to "tell it like it is" if you can 'back it up like you should.'

Originally Posted by Darkmatters

Let me ask you this then - your contention is that the unconsciuous mind knows the difference between reality and fabrication. So, when I dream of myself first as Arnold Horshak and then as Robert Redford in the same dream, was that reality?

Of course not. It was symbolism. That's the language of the unconscious. In a sense it can be said that it's reality, since dreaming of myself as Horshak represented my awful self esteem in earlier life and as Redford was a sort of fantasy representation - my mind showing me myself as an attractive man.

You know, as I write this I want to change my statement. I now say that the terms fact and fiction (or fantasy or whatever) are irrelevant in dreams and to the unconscious mind. It works with metaphor and symbol. The concept of a fact is something for science and the purely material realm of waking consciousness.

This isn't a complete flip-flop - it's me adjusting my statement because I now understand it was off base. But yeah, fact and fiction are irrelevant terms in the language of the unconscious. From a purely material standpoint it really can't distinguish between reality and fantasy, but then, in the world of inner feelings and ideas from which dreams are woven - the symbols of dreams are absolutely factual. I never was actually Arnold Horshak, but the low self esteem that represented was a fact. Hmmm... must ponder this more.

Good convo!

Dreams don't always mean representing as yourself, dreams mean many things and symbols to make you understand what your subconscious is telling you.
I go by the subconscious, not unconscious levels, i actually don't think there is an unconscious dream or such. I speak more about the subconscious means.

Originally Posted by Skillet7

Actually, the two topics are very related. The thread (which seems perfectly active to me) is about how the inability to subconsciously distinguish between reality and dreams might inhibit the natural reluctance to confide your revealing or taboo dreams in others.



Actually, you'll notice that I make no assertions here beyond quoting my peers. And I appreciate discussion and debate, but all you've done is contradict each of my posts without evidence or logic. It may seem like I'm attacking you because your position seems very unlikely, but I encourage you to "tell it like it is" if you can 'back it up like you should.'

I am trying to figure your posts out when you started to talk about distinguishing between reality and dreams, but i guess you know about it and i got no logic towards it.
I was expecting discussion than debate here, you actually turned that around by adding something else to catch some attention that's all how this started.